I broke up with my cancer please help to fix this i cant handle and i cant stop crying pleaaase

I am a leo female and my love is cancer zodiac. before 1 month my babe.s attention for me decreases tooo much and she told me that because she is busy but she dont even talk to me in her free time and the problems arises between us because of this. I made a problem for her. and one day i was in her home and she didnt treated me well because shes upset from me because of of that i said for her its over and treated her badly and i went out from her home we have been in no contact one month and after i tried to talk to her she said all of the mistake because of me and i hurt her and she dont like me any more.she asked me to be friend with her as i requested from her until we see later if it well fix or not and this time i refused to be friend althoug this was my request for her before in the no contact month becauuse i was angry from her ignore and i want to see her reaction.. the problmes starts again between us because i cant handle this situation and i know deep inside she loves me because i always take care of her always buy her what she likes always pay her bills always makee reservations for us and do with her all what she likes i was diffrent that all of her exes and better than them even in her birthday after our problems i made her day full of happiness and lately she told me that she was thanking god am in her life. my question is i reserved a hotel for us and i told her that the reservation i did it was before our broblems and we have to stick to it she will go the first day alone and the second day of reservation i will go there.. i want to know whats the right way to talk to her in the hotel and tell her that i am so sorry for this and i love her i cant leave her i will not make her sad never ever.. should i tell her all of this and all of my emotions and its ok to be weak infront of her ? Or i have to be strong and ask her only if we can give another chance and keep calm without emotions ?? What is the best way .. now i have depression because of our relationship got damage and i started to see psychological dr to be happy cause i cant handle this should i tell her this situatio also or no..tell me what what i have to do please dont be negative with me

By saying i know deep inside she loves me because i always take care of her always buy her what she likes always pay her bills always makee reservations for us and do with her all what she likes i was diffrent that all of her exes and better than them you just show you might be overestimating yourself, you can't buy love with things, bills and reservations, you're leo and you give loads of attention and expect same back, the cancer might give it to you, but i don't think you have enough emotional understanding of cancer, water element, if you break the trust you make a huge wound, she needs space to recharge her batteries, thats the trait of the water sign, we get drained and we need to recharge from time to time, if she's thanking god for you in your life, that might mean that person truly cares and appreciates you in your life, but might not have any love/attraction feelings towards you, i always thank universe for each of my good friends that remain in my life.If you don't show weekness to water sign, you'll be considered fake and kind of cold, water signs knows that each person has a weakness, and those who are close have to share happyness and sadness and weakness, and showing weakness is not accually weakness, only the strong can make themselves vulnerable, thats courage 😉 try to talk to her, but if she says she doesn't want a relationship you should respect that, you might want from her more then she can give you 🙂