Calling all Capricorn men (& women too!)

Hey,

So I'll just get right into it, I am currently talking to a very cool Cappy guy that I've known for awhile. We get on really good and have been talking on a more romantic level. He tried to get me to sleep with him right away, but I wasn't having any of that, he said it didn't matter to him if he slept with me or not it wasn't a big deal. I believe him just because he does have quite a few "fans" lol Anyway the more we're talking the more we have come to realize that we have a great connection. He's a made a few comments stating that he thought I was smart and that I'd be a good person to do business with (he has a start up clothing company and a talent management company)

Anyway fast forward today and we're doing our usual chatting intermittently on messenger and then all of a sudden he says he thinks that we shouldn't sleep together and try to hook up because he would really like to look into me working for him under one of his companies. He's says he needs a go-getter and knows I'm smart and with tell the truth. At first I asked him if this was his way of telling me he's not interested in me "that" way and he said it wasn't that at all, just that he'd hate for us to try and get together and then it doesn't work out to lose the bond we have. Basically he sees me as someone he could be with but also someone he could do business with. I did assure him that I like him as a person and even if things didn't work we'd become close friends, it's just a strong feeling I have I guess.

I was honest with him and told him while I'm absolutely flattered that he respects me enough to consider me working under one of his businesses, it would be a bit hard for me to turn off the feelings I already have for him. I told him I was embarrassed for feeling that way, because I was letting my "emotions" rule me I was being a silly girl. He told me not to be embarrassed and it was him and that he wasn't judging me. Well at least he knows where I stand.

So...I guess my question is..would he respect me more if I did just decide to forget my feelings for him and just keep it strictly platonic and eventually a business relationship..or should I go with my "heart" (lol) and move forward with trying to see if we have a future together? He says that he is looking for a wife and of course I'm looking for something permanent as well. I know this sounds corny but I could see myself being his wife, it's unreal how well we gel together. Anyway if you've read this far

cont'd

If you've read this far then thank you! lol

Poor you... you already failed... He saw that your feelings werent as strong as you lea them on to be. A cap would've respected you if you would've said " I'm not interested in a job, I can manage myself, im interested in you." He'll pull a dissapearing act soon and either never come back because he was testing you, or all his feelings for you will be gone and you'll just be a coworker. Ummmm but i might be wrong 😆. If he tried to get you to sleep with him right away he might be playing mind games to get what he wants.

Posted by Lucriu
Poor you... you already failed... He saw that your feelings werent as strong as you lea them on to be. A cap would've respected you if you would've said " I'm not interested in a job, I can manage myself, im interested in you." He'll pull a dissapearing act soon and either never come back because he was testing you, or all his feelings for you will be gone and you'll just be a coworker. Ummmm but i might be wrong 😆. If he tried to get you to sleep with him right away he might be playing mind games to get what he wants.

I never said I would take the job all I said was that I was flattered and I was pretty honest with him about my feelings..so I'm really not seeing where I "failed" lol This isn't the first time he's mentioned that he thought I was smart and has told me on more than one occasion that I've gotten more out of him then any woman has. He says that women always try to "figure" him out...I guess I saw that as a challenge and told him about some observations I've made regarding who he is...and he tried to say I was wrong..but then admitted that I was right. He said I scared him and that I know too much lol. I mean he could very well be playing games..but why go thru all of the trouble when he could easily get it from some of the other chicks he talks too? I've made it pretty damn clear that I wasn't giving in to him. He's used to getting his way obviously but I do what feels right for me and he's cool with that. He's been very honest with me for the most part. Not all Caps are the same..what's interesting is that we share the same moon and the same venus which could be why we get along so well.

Posted by Lucriu
Poor you... you already failed... He saw that your feelings werent as strong as you lea them on to be. A cap would've respected you if you would've said " I'm not interested in a job, I can manage myself, im interested in you." He'll pull a dissapearing act soon and either never come back because he was testing you, or all his feelings for you will be gone and you'll just be a coworker. Ummmm but i might be wrong 😆. If he tried to get you to sleep with him right away he might be playing mind games to get what he wants.

Another thing..why does it have to be he's testing me by saying that he thinks I'd be a good asset to his businesses? Is it that hard to believe that he sees me as a person and not just some ass? damn lol

Oh and the sex thing in the beginning seems to be an ongoing theme with Cap men in general I'm finding..

Im sorry I wasnt being objective Wasnt in the best mood. Let me try again. Your question is more focused on having his respect instead of his love,why? holding your own and letting him know he cant just say " I want your body" and getting it is enought to make ANY man respect you and want you more. Caps treasure intelligence, and if he's saying you're smart , he DEFENETLY respects you, intelligence is fucken sexy to a cap. All in all youre doing an awsome job already and dont need our advise ^.^. Once more im sorry, my first post came from a dark place.

Posted by MintSprinkles

Posted by Lucriu
Poor you... you already failed... He saw that your feelings werent as strong as you lea them on to be. A cap would've respected you if you would've said " I'm not interested in a job, I can manage myself, im interested in you." He'll pull a dissapearing act soon and either never come back because he was testing you, or all his feelings for you will be gone and you'll just be a coworker. Ummmm but i might be wrong 😆. If he tried to get you to sleep with him right away he might be playing mind games to get what he wants.

Another thing..why does it have to be he's testing me by saying that he thinks I'd be a good asset to his businesses? Is it that hard to believe that he sees me as a person and not just some ass? damn lol

Oh and the sex thing in the beginning seems to be an ongoing theme with Cap men in general I'm finding..

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I dont even hold hands on the first date. Anyway. It doesnt have to be that he's testing you. Think of my first post as a post showing the dark side of caps manipulating and the one after of them expressing themselves and wants in a healthy way.

Posted by Lucriu

Posted by MintSprinkles

Posted by Lucriu
Poor you... you already failed... He saw that your feelings werent as strong as you lea them on to be. A cap would've respected you if you would've said " I'm not interested in a job, I can manage myself, im interested in you." He'll pull a dissapearing act soon and either never come back because he was testing you, or all his feelings for you will be gone and you'll just be a coworker. Ummmm but i might be wrong 😆. If he tried to get you to sleep with him right away he might be playing mind games to get what he wants.

Another thing..why does it have to be he's testing me by saying that he thinks I'd be a good asset to his businesses? Is it that hard to believe that he sees me as a person and not just some ass? damn lol

Oh and the sex thing in the beginning seems to be an ongoing theme with Cap men in general I'm finding..

I dont even hold hands on the first date. Anyway. It doesnt have to be that he's testing you. Think of my first post as a post showing the dark side of caps manipulating and the one after of them expressing themselves and wants in a healthy way.

click to expand

Ok, well thank you for clearing that up for me, you honestly had me thinking that maybe he didn't take me seriously. I'm very upfront about how I feel about him so I'd say he has a pretty good idea of how much I like him...and you're right I probably should be more concerned with earning his love rather than his respect. I've never gone this far with a Cap before so I'm still learning some things.

And as far as the sex thing, so far the cap guys I've met thru various dating sites just seem to jump in to the sex talk right away...maybe they are all talk and no action? Either way I wasn't down with it lol

I think he is playing game. This is why I want to body slam some of them...they get way too manipulative at times. He didnt have to mention anything about not sleeping together....then mentioned it in a way as if he knew 100% it would eventually happen, when in reality that was most likely his way of saying he was wrong for coming at you like that and probably embarrased since u didnt give in.

I read that all as a cover up for his ego being bruised.

Lol no offense but dating sites are all filled with guys like that , no matter the sign 😆. Its kinda like trying to find love at a strip club * sadly... im speaking from experience* Oh, never? So you can say you're fairly new to cap dissapearing acts right? *Smiles evily* Lol good luck ^.^

Posted by lnana04
I read that all as a cover up for his ego being bruised.

Hmmmmm, and maybe manipulating you into working for him in order to have you in a setting he is comfortable with and has the upper hand. Sorry but imma go with my dark side cap.... whats his venus ,moon and rising sign?

Posted by lnana04
I think he is playing game. This is why I want to body slam some of them...they get way too manipulative at times. He didnt have to mention anything about not sleeping together....then mentioned it in a way as if he knew 100% it would eventually happen, when in reality that was most likely his way of saying he was wrong for coming at you like that and probably embarrased since u didnt give in.

Well what he doesn't realize is that I can see his manipulation from a mile away, cuz trust me in the beginning he used to say some crazy stuff..,like it was blatant to me he was just trying to get me to give in. I remember one day he was going on about something sexual and I pretty much told him that what he was asking for was not something I'd do with just a boyfriend, that would be the duty of a wife. He said ok then forget it bye! lol I was like ok and didn't respond..tell me why like a half hr later he hit me up sending me some music video talking like yea this is the cut lol. He said I'm just not giving it up because I know he always get's his way..but of course that's not the case at all. I don't know if he is running game because if he is it's pretty elaborate lol We don't talk about sex anymore and if he has something on his mind he'll ask me if he can say it first lol.

Another point I can make is that for awhile we only talked during the week. So I asked him straight up if he was married and why I never hear from him on the weekends. He basically said he has his son from Friday afternoon to Monday morning after he drops him off. His son has a lot of extra curricular activities too. I told him that I respect that he wants his weekends to be about his son. He also would ignore text and I asked him about that and he said he gets lots of text messages because it's his work phone as well and sometimes he gets so many that he just doesn't scroll thru them. So I told him ok then I know now not to text you on the weekends..or at all for that matter lol. Well ever since those conversations he's made an active effort to communicate with me on the weekends and respond to text more.

I'm finding with him that if I have an issue and I come to him rationally, calmly, and just state the facts, he apologizes, gives me the reason why, and then tries to change it. I really don't think he's playing games with me and if he is he's gooood lol

Posted by Lucriu

Posted by lnana04
I read that all as a cover up for his ego being bruised.

Hmmmmm, and maybe manipulating you into working for him in order to have you in a setting he is comfortable with and has the upper hand. Sorry but imma go with my dark side cap.... whats his venus ,moon and rising sign?

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I don't know his rising but we both have Virgo moons and Venus in Pisces...

Posted by lnana04
I read that all as a cover up for his ego being bruised.

That's an interesting way to look at it, I would agree with you if he had made those statements like right after I turned him down...but significant time had passed and he actually had a chance to get to know me and that's when he started to make those comments regarding his businesses.

Posted by Lucriu
Lol no offense but dating sites are all filled with guys like that , no matter the sign 😆. Its kinda like trying to find love at a strip club * sadly... im speaking from experience* Oh, never? So you can say you're fairly new to cap dissapearing acts right? *Smiles evily* Lol good luck ^.^

Well I'm waiting for that to happen as it hasn't yet, but I know it's probably coming...but I have a life so it really wouldn't be a big deal.

Virgo moons!!!!! ^.^ . No games what so ever, and you should be asking this question in the virgo forum. Sun sign is only what you need to achieve to be fullfilled or be ego satisfied. The moon is where the long term emotions lay. Yep Virgos will give you a more accurate answeres

Posted by Lucriu
Virgo moons!!!!! ^.^ . No games what so ever, and you should be asking this question in the virgo forum. Sun sign is only what you need to achieve to be fullfilled or be ego satisfied. The moon is where the long term emotions lay. Yep Virgos will give you a more accurate answeres

Well I know myself as I'm a Virgo moon and when I'm serious about someone I let it be known. I just asked the question here because he's a Cap and I've never dealt with them before.

"Oh and the sex thing in the beginning seems to be an ongoing theme with Cap men in general I'm finding.."

I'm not 100% sure about that. I do see it a lot on here, but the Cap I'm seeing kept ridiculous respect and boundaries in the beginning. But I also made it very clear from the get go that I demand respect. It got to the point that I had to initiate because he wouldn't. He would only go so far. To me, that's priceless in a man and speaks volumes about character. Just my opinion 🙂

It still doesnt make sense, imho, for him to randomly say "I think we shouldnt sleep together" especially if time passed. And it seemed offensive because it puts him in a light as if he had a definite chance.

My blood is starting to boil so Ill exit. I had a "moment" today with my Cap friend so I dislike em all right now. They can be highly manipulative.

Id just stay observant, and if he is serious about something real you willl know it.

Posted by lnana04
It still doesnt make sense, imho, for him to randomly say "I think we shouldnt sleep together" especially if time passed. And it seemed offensive because it puts him in a light as if he had a definite chance.

My blood is starting to boil so Ill exit. I had a "moment" today with my Cap friend so I dislike em all right now. They can be highly manipulative.

Id just stay observant, and if he is serious about something real you willl know it.

Ok, I see it now what you're saying. Hmm well I think the fact that we've established a like for each other and know eventually it would get to that point, but in due time is the reason why he said it that way. But I want to thank you all for responding I'm def gonna stay alert and keep my guard up a bit.

Posted by champranger

Posted by MintSprinkles

So...I guess my question is..would he respect me more if I did just decide to forget my feelings for him and just keep it strictly platonic and eventually a business relationship..or should I go with my "heart" (lol) and move forward with trying to see if we have a future together? He says that he is looking for a wife and of course I'm looking for something permanent as well. I know this sounds corny but I could see myself being his wife, it's unreal how well we gel together. Anyway if you've read this far

I would turn down his offer of a business relationship, if ultimately what you want is a romantic one. I think he would definitely respect you more, if you went after what you want, rather than give into what he wants.

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Well that's what I pretty much did, I guess I was just wanting reassurance that I made the right decision, because I do like him a lot and I kind of took it as him liking me a lot too because he didn't want to lose the friendship if a relationship didn't work out.

Posted by lnana04
It still doesnt make sense, imho, for him to randomly say "I think we shouldnt sleep together" especially if time passed. And it seemed offensive because it puts him in a light as if he had a definite chance.

My blood is starting to boil so Ill exit. I had a "moment" today with my Cap friend so I dislike em all right now. They can be highly manipulative.

Id just stay observant, and if he is serious about something real you willl know it.

Well it wasn't completely random we were joking back and forth and he said he thought I was funny and should write a book/movie, I told him to stop being sarcastic and he said he wasn't and that's when he told me he thought I was smart and didn't think we should sleep together and all of that.

Posted by MellyMel909
I dunno. I see it more as his mind switching gears from sex to business, and then him relaying this to you. As in: even though sex is off the table, he's still capable of recognizing what you bring to the table in a professional sense.

Him telling you is probably just to clear up any confusion or so you're not left wondering about his intentions (or lack there of).

That's the thing though sex isn't completely off the table, I'm just looking for something with more substance and he seems to be ok with that as he hasn't run away yet lol. I kind of took it as him being confused because he sees me as a woman and is sexually attracted to me but at the same time he thinks I'd be a good business partner. But of course you can't mix business with pleasure so in the end I opted to see where things go romantically with him.

I kind of have a different thought on this one. He might be used to girls jumping in the sack with him and them doing whatever pleases him. You were different. You refused to jump in right away. That's a plus on your side.

Then, he got to know you better and recognizes your full potential. So, he's taken the easy romance game plan off the table. This shows he respects you and values you.

I'd consider building the business partnership and continue to get to know him. Yeah, he's going to go do his chicks, but he will have a chance to build a relationship with you. Over time, he will come to rely on you and know he needs you. Caps build their bond with others through work and achievement.

You're out for now on the easy romance, but the long term potential is higher. Keep the sexual tension building to maintain the interest and one day, he might realize you're wife material. Partners in business, life and bed - that's a cap's ideal woman.

Of course, I could be way off base here, too. It would take years to build the kind of relationship I'm talking about and you will get bored and frustrated with waiting, watching him go through chicks and feeling left out.

Who am I kidding, what I wrote sounds like a movie script.

Then, if you're not interested in business, let him know that clearly, and go for it!!! Be the now girl!

🙂

I didn't mean now girl as in girl of the moment. I meant be with him now instead of later.

Posted by truecap
I kind of have a different thought on this one. He might be used to girls jumping in the sack with him and them doing whatever pleases him. You were different. You refused to jump in right away. That's a plus on your side.

Then, he got to know you better and recognizes your full potential. So, he's taken the easy romance game plan off the table. This shows he respects you and values you.

I'd consider building the business partnership and continue to get to know him. Yeah, he's going to go do his chicks, but he will have a chance to build a relationship with you. Over time, he will come to rely on you and know he needs you. Caps build their bond with others through work and achievement.

You're out for now on the easy romance, but the long term potential is higher. Keep the sexual tension building to maintain the interest and one day, he might realize you're wife material. Partners in business, life and bed - that's a cap's ideal woman.

Of course, I could be way off base here, too. It would take years to build the kind of relationship I'm talking about and you will get bored and frustrated with waiting, watching him go through chicks and feeling left out.

Who am I kidding, what I wrote sounds like a movie script.

You are absolutely right he is VERY used to women just sleeping with him right away. I didn't fall for it because well this is how I truly am I couldn't see myself sleeping with someone I barely know...I can count on one hand how many guys I've slept with and it's less than 5 lol so that should tell you something right there. It's funny after I wrote this post I told him that I want to take things slow with him and don't want to jack it up by rushing and he agreed to it. But I'm also not naive and know the man has needs, but we are only just talking right now so what he does before we get together is his business.

Posted by champranger

Posted by truecap
I kind of have a different thought on this one. He might be used to girls jumping in the sack with him and them doing whatever pleases him. You were different. You refused to jump in right away. That's a plus on your side.

Then, he got to know you better and recognizes your full potential. So, he's taken the easy romance game plan off the table. This shows he respects you and values you.

I'd consider building the business partnership and continue to get to know him. Yeah, he's going to go do his chicks, but he will have a chance to build a relationship with you. Over time, he will come to rely on you and know he needs you. Caps build their bond with others through work and achievement.

You're out for now on the easy romance, but the long term potential is higher. Keep the sexual tension building to maintain the interest and one day, he might realize you're wife material. Partners in business, life and bed - that's a cap's ideal woman.

Of course, I could be way off base here, too. It would take years to build the kind of relationship I'm talking about and you will get bored and frustrated with waiting, watching him go through chicks and feeling left out.

Who am I kidding, what I wrote sounds like a movie script.

I understand what you mean. But gaining a Cap's trust, while it's a great thing, is not the same thing as gaining a Cap's romantic interest. Just because she is his business partner, does not mean that she is now in his potential candidate list. He might forever only see her as a business partner, and nothing more.

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You are right. I started to delete it as soon as I wrote it. Started to sound like a rom-com movie script. Maybe I'm in a fantasiful mood today (is that a word?).