Cap in love and being very mean—??

I would have to say if any man decides to put down self imposed boundaries like that it is time to step back and reevaluate the situation. There really is no excuse for it other than his own internal mumbo jumbo.
Do not set up or allow a pattern for poor behavior and ill treatment of yourself.
Leave him be. See whether or not he pulls his head out.
Liquid courage should not be the only way to get a declaration of feeling. Gimme a hug. 🙂

Why are you soooo attracted to pain? Why do you respond with open arms to abuse? Youve posted nothing good about this guy. Not one thing, so Im convinced you love this position you are in. But why??

You are on your own because I can honestly say that theres a lot of resentment inside of a man who disrespects a woman. He may say he loves you.....while drunk, but underneath it all he resents you for not respecting yourself. He resents his "feelings" for "loving" a woman who likes to be abused and cant walk away from bs. This resentment can turn REAL ugly. Think Im lying, continue on and see.

If you dont put a stop to this now, abusive relationships are what you will most likely deal with in the future.

Inana- spot on.

"There's nothing normal in this behavior --the problem is NOT with her. I don't see how she loves pain or is inviting abuse into her life or anything of that sort."

I dont think there's anything normal with his behavior either, or the behavior of any man that only finds an ounce of courage while drunk.

She's part of the problem for allowing it.

Not only is he ignoring her, she said he acts as if he hates her, is responding in a cruel way, and is being mean. This is abusive behavior. And this same behavior is posted every other day. Instead of running away from this weirdo she posts more questions after more harsh behavior. This is her second or third time saying she cant eat or sleep, which imo is now a form of abusive behavior towards herself. But still, instead of moving away from a situation that is clearly no good for her in ANY kind of way, she wants more understand

Ah well, my post cut off..

but in a nutshell, when a guy starts getting physical with a woman, and the woman begins to wonder *how did I get here?* this is usually the start imho.

Per your other threads, I'd say just walk away with your head held high.

I will put this out there, sometimes when a cap expresses feelings like that we will shut down/pull away/feel embarrassed/feel we've said too much and basically withdraw for a while. For me, it's about feeling like I've said too much and am insecure with what the other person thinks or feels. However, in this case, you kept contact and he's being very rude, so I'm not so sure that is the case with him.

But, yeah, I don't think this is the guy for you. I'm absolutely positive you can do better!!!

You're the girl who's basically dating a Ted Bundy, right? The guy that dreams of raping girls?


The fact that you'd even consider ever approaching within a 20 mile radius of this clinical sociopath is a clear sign that you need to seek professional help, ASAP.


See: Stockholm Syndrome

I'd say to the OP learn your self-worth...Thats what you need to do. Cause when you learn your self worth you won't even need advice on this type of situation. I could care less what a man has been through with other relationships and women. Thats his problem if he didnt handle it. But he won't do is try and make it my problem. If he has issues and baggage he needs to not be dating until he heals properly. I say move on, but you won't be able to or if you do you will attract another man just like him until you build up your star player..And that be YOU!!!