Capricorn and the *C* word

Control!

I am training to be a facilitator/teacher with another woman who is a Cappy. Very nice lady, good hearted and dependable but the control in her is unreal! She tells me she wont be driven anywhere and any chance she gets to assert her control, she will.

My mother always said to my sis and i *I am in control, i am your mother*. Just before she passed i explained to her that she never was as we were free spirits. She admitted to giving up with us emotionally when we grew up and became strong women

Yesterday a friend of mine said her Cappy sister came to stay and she had to have things done her way..she just wasn't prepared to yield and row in with her family. She kept taking over.

Can anyone shed light on this, i am not sure at this stage whether it would be a good idea to work with the Capricorn woman, unless she can lighten up some. We have to teach groups and the energy between us has to be easy.

Saturn 😐

Posted by Arielle83
This 23 year old cap at my wkd job told me to do something she could of done.

I told her to get off her lazy ass.

I'm her superior.

So annoying!! It happens to me with the young cappy i work with. I'm running around serving my own tables.. and then she asks, "water for table _" or asks me to wipe a table as I walk by. While she just walks around projecting her cappy aura.

Gah. But difference is, she is my superior.

Oh welp.. I still get paid more than her 😉

I would avoid working with this person. I find it hard myself and definitely wish she wasn't around.

I do not like being told what to do and neither do i tell anyone what to do.

At work if the person is my superior i can take orders (but should be given in a wanting to get the job done kind of way.) Show me that i am meant to just take orders and i am out .

Although nobody had ever said i am difficult to be with or work with.

Posted by Arielle83

Posted by clippityclop

Posted by Arielle83
This 23 year old cap at my wkd job told me to do something she could of done.

I told her to get off her lazy ass.

I'm her superior.

So annoying!! It happens to me with the young cappy i work with. I'm running around serving my own tables.. and then she asks, "water for table _" or asks me to wipe a table as I walk by. While she just walks around projecting her cappy aura.

Gah. But difference is, she is my superior.

Oh welp.. I still get paid more than her 😉

I would avoid working with this person. I find it hard myself and definitely wish she wasn't around.

Ya I just laugh at the young ones.

They think I'm younger than I am.

click to expand

Same. It's got it's negatives :/ I'm 26 and people think I'm 20-23

Posted by Arielle83
This 23 year old cap at my wkd job told me to do something she could of done.

I told her to get off her lazy ass.

I'm her superior.

May not be a cap thing. I do my work myself . I hate to order people to do any personal work. Today i own a business and still i do not order people until its about work .

I had a cap boss long back and during my initial days with that company i remember once i was going to get coffee for myself and just casually asked her if she want any . She smiled and said never do anything for me except for your work. Liked her that very moment .

I personally hate people ordering around. Know a saggi and pisces like that

Posted by Capri-sun
Okay so in general I don't think I'm that bad about having control. I like to be in control of my emotions and my finances. I dislike being told what to do or how to do it as others have mentioned, unless I am asking for help/input.

I dislike telling people what to do. Even when training individuals it's uncomfortable because I feel like that is essentially what I'm doing. As long as they are completing all of the components of the job I don't care how they do it. If one step has yo be completed before another I let them know that, anything else doesn't matter to me. I even suggest them to watch other people doing the job as they might do it differently than I and it might be easier for them.

With my kids I try my best yo encourage them to be independent thinkers. My oldest will always ask me how she did on something and I'll ask her, well how do you think you did. I do this because I don't want them feeling they have yo do certain things or be a certain way to gain my approval. I want them to be confident in themselves.

I do get annoyed sometimes about little things like the dish towel being balled up when wet because it dries so much better when flat and doesn't retain an odor. With things like this I try to remind myself to look at the bigger picture which is the dishes got washed.

I have also noticed I get anxiety sometimes if I'm riding in the car with someone. I'm not in control of how they drive or where the car is going, how close the tailgate other cars, how fast or slow the car goes... things like that lol

My personality is geared more towards that of service and helping others. So I find the most joy in carrying out clearly defined instructions. Give me what you need done, how you want it done, and when you need it done by and I'll make sure it gets done.

My cap friend is a supervisor and she does scheduling and the purchase order for her store. She is very much a control freak and bossy. Everything has to be done her way on her time.

Thank you for taking the time to write this

As you mentioned in your last post, i am seriously thinking about whether i want to work with her.....i am light and easier going and don't want someone acting like my (Capricorn) mother 😛. She has lots of issues...but they aren't mine, so i will talk to her about whether it would work or not. My sense, is that she may not be accepted, as she is very harsh towards others and also very defensive...will see how it goes

Thanks everyone else for posting. I like the stability of Capricorns and the dry humour too but at times the Saturnian thing is a bit too much

I think the more someone enters my space the more controlling I can be.

Posted by Caplove

Posted by MyStarsShine
Control!

I am training to be a facilitator/teacher with another woman who is a Cappy. Very nice lady, good hearted and dependable but the control in her is unreal! She tells me she wont be driven anywhere and any chance she gets to assert her control, she will.

My mother always said to my sis and i *I am in control, i am your mother*. Just before she passed i explained to her that she never was as we were free spirits. She admitted to giving up with us emotionally when we grew up and became strong women

Yesterday a friend of mine said her Cappy sister came to stay and she had to have things done her way..she just wasn't prepared to yield and row in with her family. She kept taking over.

Can anyone shed light on this, i am not sure at this stage whether it would be a good idea to work with the Capricorn woman, unless she can lighten up some. We have to teach groups and the energy between us has to be easy.

Saturn 😐

Usually though, if a Cap feels the need to "take over" like your friend's sister, is because they might feel something is lacking or can be done more efficiently. There's no "right/perfect" way, obviously. It's completely subjective, of course. Many are troubleshooters/natural planners and can anticipate the things that can go wrong and just want to be helpful and useful/productive. Most of the time some might just need a person to tell them it's okay to relax and to let them take care of it. IDK, that's just me.

As far as your coworker goes, I don't think she'll "lighten up" until she feels like she can trust you and your work ethic and that takes time to build a rapport w/ her. How long have you been working together? When have you noticed that she asserts her control the most?

click to expand

We have studied together for quite some time...Personal Development work and now Community Empowerment. She trusts me, she tells me *i and my family are mad about you*. She has told me things that she didnt tell her family or anyone else. I think the trust issues are with herself..well i know they are because she told me so. She recognizes she needs to do a lot of work on herself (as we all do). The work is of an emotive and deep nature and she seems to struggle with empathy.

Time will tell i guess

Thank you for the input

Posted by DivaCanLeo
Another thing is that Caps can be very hard working, but you got to move them, by showing them how capable they are, and giving them promotions and stuff, or else you can kill their ambition.

So true. I worked with a Cap girl recently and it was very difficult trying to get her to do simple tasks at work. In speaking with her, I found out that she became unmotivated due to low morale. I understood this, but I didn't understand someone getting a paycheck, but not pulling their weight. There was always an excuse to why she couldn't do something. It got to the point where my superior was cursing me out due to her not doing the jobs I was tasking her to do. I think both Caps and Leos fair well when they are management positions. Trying to get them to do worker bee tasks is very hard especially when they are down in the dumps. And as a Virgo, I'd rather do the work myself.

Posted by ElvisStalinWoods
Ughhh, yeah. Cap Sun, Pisces Moon and Virgo Ascendant (attention to detail)

Fwiw, best thing is to tell us straight up to cool our shit. We'll be offended, we'll act offended in our way and we'll bitch and grouse about "how dare he/she" internally for a millennia until we sort of feel guilty and /try/ to avoid stepping out of line again.

Good to know. I felt guilty for having to get onto a Cap for not doing her job. The first few times I was nice about it. When being nice and cordial didn't work, I started riding her case constantly. That seemed to work. Then she turned around and told somebody I was being mean to her. I was just like omg are you serious right now? Lol