how to apologize from Leo friend

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Carolz
@Carolz
10 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 200 · Topics: 34
I have my best friend . She is a Leo. and I am a Capricorn. Since its been not a very long time to my break up I have some how managed to move on but I usually want to be alone its not my attitude but its how my engine works. I want space, All I want in my life is good music,a book to read and fresh air. And my best friend is sociable she is 24 hours online on social websites and want me to respond her talk to her daily. So for past two weeks I wasn't talking to her. Its our finals near so I also need to focus there as well. Last night she burst on me like "You are changed! You just don't need me any more!" And honestly I cannot even find a mistake of mine. Obviously My intentions behind not talking to her or any one else wasn't to hurt her. And when I apologize to her just because I have to stop that worthless argument she is showing damn attitude. And I seriously can't handle it. When I ask her what is the issue why you are so angry she was like leave it I don't want to talk and all. I personally think that if someone is doing good being alone let them be. And that's what I have learned from my break up as well. Even if my best friend would have done it to me . I will just ask her once that if she is in some problem and if she is going good then wohoo I am totally cool with it..



Let me know how I can apologize with her? I want things and relations in harmony . Any thing misplace bothers me alot so how can I rebuilt that harmony. Also I want to tell you guys that after my break this "Want To Be Alone" behavioral pattern has drastically increased and I really don;t know why..


I would love to have your opinion and please let me know If I am on a wrong side and how other person's logic works when I act like this 🙂
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HappyCapper
@HappyCapper
10 Years5,000+ Posts

Comments: 28 · Posts: 5115 · Topics: 92
Posted by Carolz
I have actually told her a couple of times that I need some space and she should think practically but she is a bit emotional one. Whenever I told her that I want to be alone she starts her emotional drama and being sarcastic about my behavior.



I quite understand you in theory, but...

The way people speak and write are often very different, and I don't know how you said it, but the way you wrote this, I found to have a bit of a tone to it. Maybe she picked up on such a tone?
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Carolz
@Carolz
10 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 200 · Topics: 34
Well I haven't wrote this but I have talked to her on this issue face to face. But as now we are about to pass our high school. Last night I said to her "Now we are no more in high school. So that we can wait till next morning to apologize with each other or sort things out. we have to sort things out here so please be practical and think more logically we both have to sort things here" She was like "you mean to say high school is over , so our friend ship is over too right?". And then again that worthless drama and arguments carried on.. Some times I feel she really don't want to sort things out :/
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HappyCapper
@HappyCapper
10 Years5,000+ Posts

Comments: 28 · Posts: 5115 · Topics: 92
Yes, she seems a bit insecure and high maintenance - it's like she wants to create drama. But I wasn't there, so...

All you can do is explain your needs and wants to her, which you seem to have done, the rest is up to her. If you need space, space is what you should get.

But.

I don't think we're from the same country, so I don't know how old you are when you finish high school where you are, but it could be that she just needs a little maturing. I was myself a late bloomer, so I tend to give younger people the benefit of a doubt - I know how it is. So maybe don't dispose of her as a friend just yet.
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lnana04
@lnana04
15 Years5,000+ Posts

Comments: 2 · Posts: 8822 · Topics: 132
Wait, did you tell her about the break up and how it has affected you?

I just read you saying you need time, but does she know why? If she knows exactly why, then I can understand your side. If she doesn't know whats really going on with you, and how it has affected you, then I can understand her side.

Have you been reassuring in letting her know you will bounce back, you just need time? Explain on detail. Fixed signs, especially, like details to get a better understanding.
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Carolz
@Carolz
10 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 200 · Topics: 34
Yes she know it all. All of my break up story. But let me tell you one thing its not like I am being negative towards her but she has a totally different approach to problem solving from mine. At the time of my break up all she said was be happy and forget. She wasn't even ready to listen what I feel. Whenever I tried to explain things she was like forget it just forget it. Just don't sort the problem out. And now when I have moved on whenever I need my space she says its all because of Him(my ex). He is the one because of whom you want to be alone. He is the one who is affecting our friendship. Even when I was in relationship she said me a couple of times that she don't like Him and he is a cheater. Although I respect her opinion at that time. But after the break up she was like "Promise me you will never let Him back in your life.. Even he come to you with his kneel down and apologizing to you" .. Sometimes I feel she never understand for what I am happy with. I mean she has given her opinion the priority to mine. To her things will be solved if ignored. And my logic is totally opposite.
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lnana04
@lnana04
15 Years5,000+ Posts

Comments: 2 · Posts: 8822 · Topics: 132
Okay, now I have a better understanding lol.

In that, I agree with the person that said take care of yourself first. Sometimes it seems people are not accepting of our problems, or how we deal with issues. In a way, she seems a bit unaccepting and dismissive of your entire process. She cant see it through your lense. So yeah, just take care of you for right now. Give yourself time to heal, and if shes a friend she'll still be around. I wouldn't worry too hard because its not guaranteed she'll appreciate or understand. Seems like time wasted for now.
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HappyCapper
@HappyCapper
10 Years5,000+ Posts

Comments: 28 · Posts: 5115 · Topics: 92
Learning how to understand yourself and other people is a life long process. I'm still friends with my best friend since we were 6 years old and we still have problems understanding one another at times. It's just that now we know that we don't always understand each other and that we therefore need to be patient and talk. We always work it out...nowadays...

We're all just different. 🙂
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SpiceNSugar
@SpiceNSugar
12 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 34 · Posts: 2216 · Topics: 66
I agree with much of what Stillwater and Inana have said. You have your way to deal with matters and she has hers. Don't ask her to be practical and unemotional because apparently she doesn't function that way. By asking those things from her, you are basically rejecting who she is and how she bahaves. Hence she gets even more clingy and makes statements that annoy you.