what to do when cap is distant?

So my cap has been distant in the past and the reason behind that was he had no money and now he's become distant again And I still don;t know how to handle it and what to do.He's really really stressed now because hes 24 years old recently finished college and still hasn't found a job and is pretty much broke.These past couple of weeks he just stopped initiating contact and is not as enthusiastic about talking to me as he used to be.It was his bday and I sent him a birthday wish by text telling him how wonderful he is,how i love him/etc. and he didn't even respond.He responded to the bday fb message i sent him though. Basically He only responds to me when I contact him and he responds right away but stopped doing the initiating.When he does respond it's just a couple of words,sometimes just stops our convo and I could tell that he's not in a happy place now and he may be depressed.But on facebook he keeps liking my posts,pictures,etc.The thing I need help with is ,I don't know what to do.Should I continue all the initiating?or should I just leave him alone and let him come to me?But if i do just leave him alone and wait for him,wouldn't he just forget me?I feel like when I initiate contact i'm bugging/annoying him cause he doesn't seem enthused.



Thanks guys

The lovely kind hearted warm txt on his birthday may feel like ur smothering him which is why he didn't respond.
Plus he does still like you n replied to ur fb message n likes pics updates etc.
Capis are more pics, in person type of ppl rather then men of many words..
It's hard to do but try to reduce the constant texts / calls etc.
Leave it a week and text something provocative or show up at his place no talking just jump his bones n leave.
He needs to feel like the guy but can't as he doesn't have money/job/ can't provide etc
The in person provocative thing is just for fun n to show ur still there for him n hugs xx

Posted by SamCancerGirl
The lovely kind hearted warm txt on his birthday may feel like ur smothering him which is why he didn't respond.
Plus he does still like you n replied to ur fb message n likes pics updates etc.
Capis are more pics, in person type of ppl rather then men of many words..
It's hard to do but try to reduce the constant texts / calls etc.
Leave it a week and text something provocative or show up at his place no talking just jump his bones n leave.
He needs to feel like the guy but can't as he doesn't have money/job/ can't provide etc
The in person provocative thing is just for fun n to show ur still there for him n hugs xx

oh gosh!Thanks!I just realized my biggest mistake 😢 I smother him ALL the time.He has low self esteem so I always tell him how wonderful,handsome he is and how much I love him ,etc.I think I better stop 😢ANd whenever I tell him how handsome he is and when I compliment him,he usually ignores.

Pillowhome - yup that usually makes them disappear for a while. Don't be disheartened thou, give him some alone time and he will be back for sure..
Ps - what's ur star sign?

Posted by SirB
Give him space he's going through some sheet now. He'll come around again so reduce the texting/contacting for a while while he sorts his head out. When you do text him, just reassure him that you're there for him.

We're a moody, depressing bunch lol...

+ 10000

Also, we can see through the compliments. He knows why you are saying all this and that's why he ignores. Compliment only if you mean it and space them out.

Posted by M
He's not enthused because it's still the same old story. You need to go absorb what others users have said in your prior threads. For your own sake you need to chill out and back away before your brain breaks down from overanalyzing this.

Yes! I tried to log in earlier to tell her to stop. This IS the same story.

Girly, Im not sure what you want to hear from us.

Just from my own experience with a cap, leave him alone. It's just not worth the stress. If he wants to talk to you, he will.
Live your life and let him live his. If its meant to be, it will.

Posted by pillowhome

Posted by SamCancerGirl
The lovely kind hearted warm txt on his birthday may feel like ur smothering him which is why he didn't respond.
Plus he does still like you n replied to ur fb message n likes pics updates etc.
Capis are more pics, in person type of ppl rather then men of many words..
It's hard to do but try to reduce the constant texts / calls etc.
Leave it a week and text something provocative or show up at his place no talking just jump his bones n leave.
He needs to feel like the guy but can't as he doesn't have money/job/ can't provide etc
The in person provocative thing is just for fun n to show ur still there for him n hugs xx

I smother him ALL the time.

click to expand

Welp...looks like you better leave your pillowhome. Hehehe 😄

My GF is a Cap and when we first started talking she was having major life issues. I'm my experience, you need to back off and let them figure their life out. Caps are Very independent and need space to figure their situations out on their own. I just let my girl know I am always here for her (her rock). And that's about all you should do. Your guy will come around when be figures himself out. How can he be in a relationship. When he has nothing to give.

Thanks for all the insight guys!!!But what I don't get is he goes out drinking with his friends most nights and I know he texts and calls his friends,but not me.I don't get it.Why would he not initiate contact with me,but contact his friends—?? 😢