Gem gal pal issue

Recently, my gem gal pal confessed that she has an anger issue. At work she hates getting told what to do and is jealous of higher up employees (shock face). I know that she is frustrated with her financial situation. She wants to buy a home for herself and son but her job won't support her dream. How should I help her through this b/c I did not know this about her?

ego

Posted by geminitwin
At work she hates getting told what to do

Does she get what having a job implies?

That ego is hitting her hard. I hate to see her down. How do I get her mind out of this phase b/c she is bringing me down talking about it so much.

getting over yourself and listen to her mad ravings. what else can you do unless you plan on giving her a big check

Strategize, strategize, strategize!

For a Gem a plan is everything, give her a plan, then if it doesn't work devise another tactic. The only caveat to this would be if she's gone so low that she shoots down every idea you have.

In this case, all that need be said is, I am trying to help you come up with a plan, a solution, but it sounds like you only want to complain? If so, I will just listen, but if not... let's try and find a way out of this shall we?

I respond REALLY well to that.

Posted by GemsRaGalsBestPal
Strategize, strategize, strategize!

For a Gem a plan is everything, give her a plan, then if it doesn't work devise another tactic. The only caveat to this would be if she's gone so low that she shoots down every idea you have.

In this case, all that need be said is, I am trying to help you come up with a plan, a solution, but it sounds like you only want to complain? If so, I will just listen, but if not... let's try and find a way out of this shall we?

I respond REALLY well to that.

^^^This!! It would really work on me as well... Sometimes, I get caught up in the "should've, could've, would've's" and lose track of trying to form a plan.

Thanks for the advice. We have been talking. She wants to start a business. But the climate is so bad for business without some capital and a market.

RE: she can't afford a home with her current rate of pay....i get this, been there, done that.

however, if she's not looking for a home over her current means, you can easily get a good starter home (depending upon location of course) for the same as what some pay for an apt.

I don't know where she lives, so this is just pertinent to some places I've lived in the US. in the midwest, south, southwest, you can get a small home for about $ 750 - $ 1,000 per month mortgage. In most cases, that is what a decent two - three bed room apt runs. With the home, you build up equity.
However, if I were her, I'd hang onto my earnings and see where the economy goes first before I'd move into a home. Why? Because there is going to be another housing bubble. When we sold our home last year, we took a huge hit and lost a lot on the sale. We'll never make that back up. Sometimes it's better just to stick with what you got. It's better than being homeless and in debt.

Now, if she doesn't like her current job, maybe she should pursue other positions? I work in healthcare as a CMA. I've been laid off 3 times in the past 4 years. Mostly due to cut backs in the industry, and now with Obamacare. I've been in contact with a company to do work from my home and allows me to be my own boss, which is great because I'm extremely independent and a very hard worker. Maybe your friend should look into this type of scenario since she can't stand seeing others at work fair better.

Life sometimes sucks and isn't always fair. However, we all have choices. And I like what GemRaGalsBestPal said. Indeed we Gems embrace a good plan. I'm always making plans and setting things up to help my "fly by the pants" husband, and my two boys, get things accomplished without losing our collective minds.

RE: starting a business.....very tough right now. Honestly, if she doesn't have enough for a mortgage, she won't have the $ $ $ to risk it. Don't believe the stock market highs....it's all a bubble and will burst in 2014. Best thing to do is put your money into safe investments, gold and silver, and be diligent with your money. Honestly, since she is one of the lucky few that hasn't been laid off, especially since she has a child, she'd be smart to keep her job. There is so much uncertainty in the economy, the record deficit is going to bite us in the a $ $ sooner than later. The can has been kicked down the road for so long, it's almost reached it's end point.

Tell her to be proactive and change the situation she's in. For now, just continue to be a friend to her.