Nefer's Posts

Hi Mr.DXP,

I alluded to this request here:
https://www.dxpnet.com/opinion/pisces/nefer-3536097/?p=7#3537546<BR>
As I'm sure you've learned, you lost one of your members last week. She didn't leave on a whim, she didn't outgrow astrology, she didn't have a trivial e-feud or get banned. She lost her life and by virtue of that, her presence is no more.

Nefer was a beautiful and insightful person. As I write this, I am moved to tears because she was, without a shred of doubt, one of the few people on this site who have impacted my life positively. When I wasn't creating havoc, when I had a moment of need, I'd go to her board and would post a heartfelt plea for understanding and I'd wait. I'd wait the post that would shed light and they were always penned by her hand. She was so deep, so thoughtful, so thorough, so understanding...

I lost my mother 10 years ago and upon her death, I took the task of putting her affairs in order. In doing so, I discovered some amazing things...letters she'd written, old report cards and projects from elementary school...the most random bits of "why in the hell did she keep this and in each discover, I found myself laughing and crying and overall just happy that she'd left behind something to remember her kindness and her love for me. But after it was all said and done, I longed for more...more of my mother, more of who she was, more of what I thought I'd have time to learn and know.

I wrote all that to say, you have the amazing opportunity to provide an immeasurable gift to her children. Her words have inspired and helped so many people on this site. She has shared so much of herself with us and has grown in the process. Part of her life, part of who she was is all right here. It's all right here and it's timestamped and orderly and what a tragedy it'd be to lose such priceless information.

I humbly beg of you to temporarily disable the feature that deletes threads upon a user's request for removal.

I ask that you create a backup of the site and/or create a backup of all threads to which Nefer has contributed.

If other users agree, I humbly request that you reach out to Anthony Jacot and ask if he would like to receive copies. Sizzurp reached out to him last night via FB and he promptly responded.

Overall, I hope you recognize that magnitude of what you have at your disposal and I really hope that you're willing and able to give an awesome gift to her family and their generations moving forward.

Finally, a request was made to her brother to create a Paypal donation button. We hope to have the code for the button later today, if not later this week.

Would it be possible to place this code in the header/footer of the site? If not, would it be possible to make a thread for her "sticky" in the Pisces forum so that it always appears at the top and can not be deleted?

On a side note, I rarely visit profiles as I'm not much interested in most folks beyond the board themselves. Even after learning of her death, I don't recall ever clicking Nefer's...until now and lo and behold, right at the top is a post from me 🙂 😢

My point is, as much shit that goes on here, many of us come back not only for the drama, but for insight and growth. I am very thankful to have had the opportunity to have experienced even a small portion of who she is and I pray that you give us the opportunity to remember, honor and support her.

Thank you.

Posted by ellessque
I wholeheartedly agree. Her words and wisdom are priceless. This is certainly an exception to any rule.

Nefer was very much a significant thread woven into this site that has made it what it is.

Thanks Scorp.

I'm pissed and sad that right now, I'm crying for a person I hardly know and have never met and yet whom I feel connected to. I wish knew her better because if she can impact me like this, I can only imagine what those who truly know her feel.

All I can say is that the sentiment is real, her words, for now, are real and I hope that the site owner will do whatever is in his power to keep it that way.

Did her posts speak about her friends and family?

I for one speak quite a bit about my friends and family. Sometimes, I vent about them here. If, I were unable to explain myself or even defend myself, I would not want my posts shared with anyone but you guys.

However, you all know Nefer better. Maybe someone could scrub the posts to make sure there is not something there that would hurt or offend anyone if and before they are shared.

Even in death, one has a right to privacy.

@Nala, I thought about that and I haven't read every one of posts and as much as I feel for her, I'm not sure I have the time or energy to go back through years of postings...I would however do so if group consensus demanded it.

The one thing Nefer was is real. She didn't like censorship and in terms of privacy, I can't say 100% , but her protection of self had more to do with strangers from DXP invading her personal life without permission, not the other way around.

I learned a lot about my mother after she died. Somethings were not so flattering like how I was conceived or how she actually died, but in the end, I'd gladly accept the bad and the good.

So overall, I'd leave it to her brother to decide what to do with the material. If he feels the need to go through and truncate, let that be her family's choice. What would truly be disgusting and sad is to allow some asshole on this site who deletes and returns, deletes and returns, to destroy a part of who she is.

Oh and one more thing, I don't know if she had other usernames? Does anyone recall? Are those accounts still active, if so, please post the usernames so IF DXP is able to honor these requests, those accounts can be included to and her family can do with them whatever they feel is right.

I agree. I have lost both my parents as young adult and alot of information is lost, they didnt write anything. As an older brother I have taken all responsabilities and had to cope with it without any information. Now they would have a grandson and I would like to know how I was as child comparing with my son, even for medical purposes, if had that disease or something...

But I accepted it because I embrace positive things about them and keep them in my heart. If their children have this information the accpetance will be easier and better, because it is Nefer, a 100% real person even participating in a forum.

Agreed! Please consider, Duncan.

She spoke about her children a lot...including her daughter's pregnancy and adoption.
I can't imagine what it would mean for her children to have a chance to read that.

We will make sure that her posts are not deleted, unless the family asks us to remove them. And in that case, we will provide them with a copy of all of her posts for their own use.

Thank you!

Posted by dxpnet
We will make sure that her posts are not deleted, unless the family asks us to remove them. And in that case, we will provide them with a copy of all of her posts for their own use.

AWESOME!

thank you very much 🙂