
TxOgal
@TxOgal
11 Years1,000+ PostsTaurus
Comments: 177 · Posts: 2190 · Topics: 92






Posted by Montgomerythe relatives part was not an excuse though.. his mom kept calling him while we were together but he just stayed with me .. the thing is we should have hanged out for like 3 hours n we only saw eachother for half of that time..
It shouldn't be this hard.
I've responded to your posts, before, and you get angry when I (or anyone else) mentions this.
Distant relatives to be visited.... busy schedule... parental obligations!
And now... joining the ARMY?
Really??
The list of excuses gets longer and more creative, every time-- when are you going to see
this, for yourself?
And yeah, you should be furious.


Posted by cheekyfaeriea year .. thing is he never did such thing.. i mean he would even take a day off from work to see me .. cause our work schedule clashes.. i am shocked that he didn not apologize about forgetting to tell me...
How long have you guys been a thing? He doesn't make you a priority. I say move on. You don't have to be THE priority, but you'll never get anywhere if you aren't A priority.

Posted by Montgomeryhe did not tell me ... he thought i knew ... even worse eh!
Half the time... it was an excuse.
Distant relatives... lie.
The army-- that's HUGE.
He thought he told you?
That's not good enough.
Take the proverbial bull by the horns and dump him... he deserves
it, and you deserve better.
Don't you have a Scorp moon?
Do some recon and find out what he's really doing.
Or just dump him-- it doesn't matter.
Not even trying to be mean... this just isn't right.

Posted by KoniuchaI dont even feel like making the effort
Yeah, I don't know. Not telling you about the army seems like a big deal.
You really need to ask him what's up.

Posted by GreyWizI dont know how I got this patience ... when he told me about the army .. he said it was stressing him alot and then I could not get angry at him cause i know how much it sucks being in the army.. let alone for 3 whole years.. he was even trying to escape from it but he was feeling so stressed about it ..
kick him to the curb...............
you need better than that. unless he is genuine and there is other stuff bugging him.

Posted by GreyWizThanks GreyWiz ...
I am really sorry that this turned out like this.
*hugs*
I think you need to cut off communication for a while. have some chill time. let things unwind and see where you want to go from there.


Posted by SkittyIt appears to me this way too..
When i was dating that was the type of behavior that i would do- Bounce out, Make excuses, Cancel plans
At the time i refered to it as "Planting the seed"
Little things to get there subconscious working, This way at least a piece of them knew it was ending - with hopes that it wouldn't be drama filled when it did actually end.
Not to imply that this is what he is doing.
But- you know- something to consider
I'd just call him out him. Ask him what he wants. Only way to get really get your answer- Well that, or just wait.
Posted by GreyWizGreat advice.
I am really sorry that this turned out like this.
*hugs*
I think you need to cut off communication for a while. have some chill time. let things unwind and see where you want to go from there.


Posted by SkittyI see what you mean.. but it was a totally different situation.. too personal to mention it on here.. but i do felt him distancing himself that time...
So- this behavior has been a topic for discussion in the past.
Clearly he knows it bothers you- Considering how you reacted the last time, why would he continue to do it?
A.) He could be intentionally doing it- looking to provoke an emotional response from you. Insecure people do this stuff all the time. It's how they find confirmation of others affections, without being direct. It's really just a call for your attentions, so they can feel needed and wanted.

Posted by piscesmoon2When theoretically will this mercury retro be over? just curious
Mercury retro... Miss communication time... give him another chance... and if he does not get it then tell him to kick rocks...
PM

Posted by TxOgalgood luck and update op!
he called me. n it turns out he was actually mad at something i said "accidentally" last night.. it did not even cross my mind.. we had a heated argument :/ .. he said he's on his way to me now .


Posted by JoselineI did that .. and we met today
what he did was not nice so let him know that and tell him this shouldn't happen again...and i think if he really cares he would come to see you again even if it's only for a short time...


Posted by TxOgalUntil next time.
update: So he called me today and it turns out there were several misunderstandings..
1. I said something that sounded disrespectful to him last night and i apologized and told him that i take it back n did not mean it to sound like that.. last night he said theres no problem and he was just shocked i said that..
2. Afterwards i continued talking but he was quiet.. i thought he was just tired or sleepy.. and when i asked if im going to see him.. he said "that will be hard...blabla" (today he tells me it was his reaction to what i said last night) I told him but we talked about it and I apologized.. etc. But well this is why he did that to me :/
3. When I muted the call.. the call disconnected shortly after that.. n he thought i hanged up on him without saying anything.. (actually last night i thought he hanged up on me.. how ironic) I told him i didnt hang up and told him he knows why i muted (i used to mute when i cry) he asked me if i were crying.. i didnt respond but well its obvious..
I was so angry on the phone but let everything out n he did too.. then he said he's coming to me now where i am. I discouraged him n told him im leaving in a while anyway.. but he insisted to come see me. So i told him to do whatever he wants.
He came to me n we calmly talked about it.. He apologized to me and I told him not to do that to me ever again and if theres anything wrong he should just tell me and not only react to me cause this complicates things.. especially that the last month many misunderstandings rose between us.. he told me he's really sorry n would never want to upset me.. he was very calm, hugged me n kissed my hand.. and i felt he is telling the truth..
I told him about the army thing.. n he apologized for that too, said that its his mistake.. its not a small thing n he should have told me anyway even if its known.. told me this is depressing him and he was not trying to hide it from me
well thats all i guess ..

Posted by rockyroadicecreamI do trust your words.. ive agreed with many of your posts on here before .. i wonder did u see the update?
Oh this guy is so full of shit. This is classic "not into you" bullshit. The fact that it continues to get worse is because he gets the vibe that he CAN get away with this behavior. He's pushed boundaries with you and you've allowed it. I mean really, you decided to take a course closer to HIS place so YOU could see him? Here's a hypothetical, but why wouldn't HE take the course closer to YOU so he could see YOU?
You're making all the effort here and he thinks he doesn't have to because YOU have told him it's okay to do. You are totally playing beaten wife here and accepting his shitty behavior by not putting him in his place.
You teach others how to treat you and you've taught this loser that being flaky and giving you these lame fuck excuses is okay. There is no confusion, you just refuse to see what's really happening.
A guy who is really into you doesn't treat you as an option who gets his time when he feels like it, he'll actually make time for you and follow through on his words.
Actions speak louder than words. Pay the hell attention to actions and you'd be a lot happier and know what really needs to be done here.

Posted by rockyroadicecreamon our first date ..he actually traveled 4 hours to only see me.. i was in a different city n wasnt going back before a month..
Oh this guy is so full of shit. This is classic "not into you" bullshit. The fact that it continues to get worse is because he gets the vibe that he CAN get away with this behavior. He's pushed boundaries with you and you've allowed it. I mean really, you decided to take a course closer to HIS place so YOU could see him? Here's a hypothetical, but why wouldn't HE take the course closer to YOU so he could see YOU?
You're making all the effort here and he thinks he doesn't have to because YOU have told him it's okay to do. You are totally playing beaten wife here and accepting his shitty behavior by not putting him in his place.
You teach others how to treat you and you've taught this loser that being flaky and giving you these lame fuck excuses is okay. There is no confusion, you just refuse to see what's really happening.
A guy who is really into you doesn't treat you as an option who gets his time when he feels like it, he'll actually make time for you and follow through on his words.
Actions speak louder than words. Pay the hell attention to actions and you'd be a lot happier and know what really needs to be done here.

Posted by TxOgalThen why are you playing the role?
I do trust your words.. ive agreed with many of your posts on here before .. i wonder did u see the update?
also.. he always came closer to my home, we always met near my home, and wherever i decide. he does make the efforts.. this is whats keeping me with him that i do see efforts from his side.. im no beaten wife.. this is never me

Posted by TxOgalAnd how long ago was this first date?Posted by rockyroadicecreamon our first date ..he actually traveled 4 hours to only see me.. i was in a different city n wasnt going back before a month..
Oh this guy is so full of shit. This is classic "not into you" bullshit. The fact that it continues to get worse is because he gets the vibe that he CAN get away with this behavior. He's pushed boundaries with you and you've allowed it. I mean really, you decided to take a course closer to HIS place so YOU could see him? Here's a hypothetical, but why wouldn't HE take the course closer to YOU so he could see YOU?
You're making all the effort here and he thinks he doesn't have to because YOU have told him it's okay to do. You are totally playing beaten wife here and accepting his shitty behavior by not putting him in his place.
You teach others how to treat you and you've taught this loser that being flaky and giving you these lame fuck excuses is okay. There is no confusion, you just refuse to see what's really happening.
A guy who is really into you doesn't treat you as an option who gets his time when he feels like it, he'll actually make time for you and follow through on his words.
Actions speak louder than words. Pay the hell attention to actions and you'd be a lot happier and know what really needs to be done here.click to expand


Posted by cheekyfaerieYeah, I know. But she apparently refuses to see logic as well which is just a double whammy in a situation like this. We all have been there- too close or unsure to see the obvious. But when you refuse to accept what others are telling you and proceed to scramble for reasons why you should stick around...Posted by rockyroadicecreamShe's rationalizing because she's too close to get perspective. Either he's gonna hafta leave her or piss her off thoroughly enough to finally do it herself.
Oh this guy is so full of shit. This is classic "not into you" bullshit. The fact that it continues to get worse is because he gets the vibe that he CAN get away with this behavior. He's pushed boundaries with you and you've allowed it. I mean really, you decided to take a course closer to HIS place so YOU could see him? Here's a hypothetical, but why wouldn't HE take the course closer to YOU so he could see YOU?
You're making all the effort here and he thinks he doesn't have to because YOU have told him it's okay to do. You are totally playing beaten wife here and accepting his shitty behavior by not putting him in his place.
You teach others how to treat you and you've taught this loser that being flaky and giving you these lame fuck excuses is okay. There is no confusion, you just refuse to see what's really happening.
A guy who is really into you doesn't treat you as an option who gets his time when he feels like it, he'll actually make time for you and follow through on his words.
Actions speak louder than words. Pay the hell attention to actions and you'd be a lot happier and know what really needs to be done here.click to expand

Posted by TxOgalYou don't?
@rockyroadicecream: masochist? excuse me I dont get how I'm being like that..
And what do you expect me to do? hang a rope for him? I'm giving him a second chance

Posted by rockyroadicecreamI do see what you mean .. and I know that he put me on the defensive but I too made it clear to him how he's been so wrong and he would try to find a way to justify.his actions.. why do u think he ended up explainibg and apologizing? .. I know apologies are no big deal but its a first step.. I am not going to do much from my side.. I will receive and observe.. I will observe quietly while trying to isolate my heart from.it.. and see what his actions are really showing about him..Posted by TxOgalYou don't?
@rockyroadicecream: masochist? excuse me I dont get how I'm being like that..
And what do you expect me to do? hang a rope for him? I'm giving him a second chance
Really?
Go reread your posts.
This sounds like more than a second chance.click to expand

Posted by TxOgalMore frilly words from him, less action.Posted by rockyroadicecreamI do see what you mean .. and I know that he put me on the defensive but I too made it clear to him how he's been so wrong and he would try to find a way to justify.his actions.. why do u think he ended up explainibg and apologizing? .. I know apologies are no big deal but its a first step.. I am not going to do much from my side.. I will receive and observe.. I will observe quietly while trying to isolate my heart from.it.. and see what his actions are really showing about him..Posted by TxOgalYou don't?
@rockyroadicecream: masochist? excuse me I dont get how I'm being like that..
And what do you expect me to do? hang a rope for him? I'm giving him a second chance
Really?
Go reread your posts.
This sounds like more than a second chance.
i just am too understanding maybe.. and this is ehats been showing off in my posts.. but im noway a doirmate .. i really laugh at thisclick to expand

Posted by cheekyfaerie+ freaking 1
Rocky means well. For people that have come out the other side of relationships like this or people that lucked out and found someone that treats them the way they deserve to be treated, it's sad to read your posts.
Maybe I'm wrong. Maybe he'll turn around and become that person for you, but these rarely turn out like that. He'll continue to give you just enough to keep you coming back. You'll continue to come here for advice and then tell people they've got it all wrong. You don't know this yet, but it's not supposed to be this way. Like Monty said, it's not supposed to be this hard. You're confusing the emotion you get from the drama as love. This is not healthy love.

Posted by busyeyes88She's a fixed sign. They're lost causes and are drawn to drama.
What's the point in trying to advise you?! This is not your first thread re this leo. Your relationship is failing and has been for a while. He is not fully invested but you already know this. but you prefer to live in denial and the drama of someone who treats you badly.. Nothing more can be advised or said.

Posted by tizianiI can relate to this ... maybe the problem is I dont know how to "strictly" show him tgat he's created a great problem.. i am sure he has no idea that i had the idea of breaking up on mind from what hes done last night..
" I am not going to do much from my side"
That's kind of the source of your conflict. The thing about actions and words... it cuts both ways.
You're willing to believe you'd made it clear to him where you stand, because you told him a few things and never doing it again. Those are just words.
But to him you're far more likely to be the girl he can call up when he pleases and when it gets to crisis time, just come visit you, smooth things over (and... worryingly... subtly imply it's your fault you're hurt which is pretty emotionally abusive on his part) and just continue on with this cycle of keeping you at priority number 5 on his list. That's who you show yourself to be in his eyes.
It's as much what you do that counts.
With respect to your actual question, I think you have the right to feel whatever you feel. It's just he evidently isn't that great of a protector, and he's not likely to learn how to protect someone's feelings when you continue to sit back and take it. That's all it is really.

Posted by rockyroadicecreamYou dont know me.. and you dont know that im always the one who runs away from a bad or uncomfortable relationship.. i always broke up knowing it is the right decision even if im still in love with a person.. it is always black or white for me.. and people always wondered how could i be strong enough to detach my heart from someone.. I am sure I would have broken up with him long ago if i saw im unhappy.. but truth is he makes me happy everyday .. apart from the occasional conflicts.. which i believe are present in every relationship?Posted by busyeyes88She's a fixed sign. They're lost causes and are drawn to drama.
What's the point in trying to advise you?! This is not your first thread re this leo. Your relationship is failing and has been for a while. He is not fully invested but you already know this. but you prefer to live in denial and the drama of someone who treats you badly.. Nothing more can be advised or said.click to expand
Posted by TxOgalTxOgal I don't think any of what you have stated is as big of a problem as your continuing to seek counsel from amateurs who subscribe to a very disposal solution anytime you don't get your way. The onus of establishing a solid relationship with any sign is to first understand, everyone wants to be loved for who they are not who you would like for me to become. Including you. My 2centsPosted by cheekyfaeriea year .. thing is he never did such thing.. i mean he would even take a day off from work to see me .. cause our work schedule clashes.. i am shocked that he didn not apologize about forgetting to tell me...
How long have you guys been a thing? He doesn't make you a priority. I say move on. You don't have to be THE priority, but you'll never get anywhere if you aren't A priority.
is our time together that insignificant?
he has been caring .. he calls me everyday. texts me once he wakes up n mid day at work n even later .. n he has been very understanding.. how do u think i could be "that"calm with him?? .. i am not a calm person when im bothered.. but i find myself mirroring his cool attitude.. but this time it really feels so wrong ...click to expand

Posted by piscesmoon2This isn't the first thread... she's swimming upstream.
Mercury retro... Miss communication time... give him another chance... and if he does not get it then tell him to kick rocks...
PM





Posted by 037I dont know what you are talking about? .. i am his girlfriend and we talk about what we want to do in life and how we want to live it.. etc I dont know why you're saying he is a dream?
The thing is, OP, you don't know your Leo. If you were really together, he'd share his hopes, dreams and plans with you.
But, just a couple of days ago, you made a faux pas which set me to thinking perhaps this Leo is a dream you have, and that you may not know the real deal here. Maybe he doesn't consider you his girlfriend. And you have ideas about him that may not be fact.
So, its up to you to figure out if you are in something real or its just wishful thinking.

Posted by TxOgalPosted by rockyroadicecreamYou dont know me.. .Posted by busyeyes88She's a fixed sign. They're lost causes and are drawn to drama.
What's the point in trying to advise you?! This is not your first thread re this leo. Your relationship is failing and has been for a while. He is not fully invested but you already know this. but you prefer to live in denial and the drama of someone who treats you badly.. Nothing more can be advised or said.click to expand




Posted by rockyroadicecreamPoor you. I don't care what you imagine. I just laugh at how you guys are becoming more and more opinionated.
Sorry, that's the imagery I get whenever I hear people use that line haha.
"You don't know me!"
*pictures white trash whore on Jerry*
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I started a language course near his home (an hour away from mine) and i only go once a week. Last week he came to see me but only for a very short time cause he had family obligations that were all of a sudden.. I was understanding and thanked him for coming to see me eventhough his family wanted him to stay cause they had guests over.. So he told me next week we will have lunch together after my course...
Today I was so stressed at work and once I thought "oh well i'll see my love tomorrow and i cant wait.. " i had a big smile on my face .. then at night while we're talking, I noticed he did not mention anything about meeting up tomorrow like we agreed last week.. so i asked him "wont i see u tomorrow?".. he was like.. "no it will be hard" he has to visit a distant relative as his father asked him to.. and he is not sure when he will be done .. I was trying to stay calm and collected and wished his relative wellness.. then I told him "why didnt u tell me before?" he said "i only knew yesterday and i forgot to tell you" .. n he did not apologize 😢
Then I put the call on mute cause my scorpio moon got me bursting into tears n i didnt want him to hear me... then i think he hanged up...
I texted a while later "I didnt know you'd forget such thing" and told him to have a good sleep..
I am really angry at him 😢 .. and i feel he is being so fucking cold.. is this normal??