Taking it slow?

Is it a common for a libra man to take things slow?

Okay here's the story:

*kinda lengthy*

I lost my virginity to this libra guy and we basically grew up since tween years. We're in our mid 20s now. He's a few years younger than me and partly that's the reason why we broke up. We were FWB for a good 4 years before he asked me to be official with him and then we committed for almost 2 years. We were very committed at a young age and my Leo ways got me to becoming controlling which was my first mistake. I was very selfish when I found out that he was like a little puppy to me and I end up taking him for granted for those years.

Hindsight is 20/20 btw

It was a very sad break up for me and of course he went on to be with another girl fairly quickly which broke my heart.

So to heal myself, I got with someone else.

I ended up pregnant by the other guy and our lives just went opposite ways. He got into trouble with that girl because she was an enabler to many things for him and I was in a bad abusive relationship. Fast forward to me leaving my baby daddy and he kind of leaves his girl and we meet up and we mess around and then decide to try and talk again.

He ended up taking her back after she cheated on him.

And again, I was left hanging.

Fast forward exactly a year later and he comes running and the same exact thing happens. We mess around and talk about being together and then he goes back to her.

Yes by now, I'm hating myself.

IM AWARE OF MY MISTAKES.

I told him to never talk to me again and to tell his family that I don't wanna be friends with any of them anymore. (I was bitter & dramatic)

He moves off to a different state with her and some of their friends.



Fast forward AGAIN 1 year and 4 months.. I see his family for the first time in awhile at a social gathering that we all attend. They apparently had to go pick him up from that other state because that girl cheated on him and he finally caught her with his own eyes and left her. I was expecting to have an awkward tension between us because our past closure was super dramatic. But no, we started with small talk and this time..it was soooo easy to talk to him!

We had a good time hanging out and ended up talking the night away.

We hung out mostly VERTICALLY and it felt good.

Not saying that I had hope for anything right away, but I had grown that past year and stopped being bitter.

I matured and realized that I couldn't hate him anymore and I was emotionally content.

Conversation had never been so easy as this time.

We ended up going back to his sisters house because I used to be close to his sister and it was very easy going. I just genuinely enjoyed our time together. The sparks were there, but it felt mature - if that makes sense.

I originally thought that we would just do our usual thing and then not talk again. But no.

This time, we agreed to stop mid-kiss.

I told him that I didn't want to rush anything.

And we spent the entire night communicating how this could possibly go down.

We agreed not to cheapen this experience again.

We agreed to wait and take it very very slow.

Almost like to re-meet and start all over. Leave the roller coaster of a past behind.

Leave the one night stands and the FWB junk behind.

I told him that I can't be in a relationship right away and he said he can't either because he's got to get his life together now that he's back in our hometown.

It felt right.

He said we would hangout and not have to feel like we have to have sex and I told him that when we hangout that I'll always go home at a decent hour. Nobody is staying the night with nobody.

It just felt so entirely different because we have never taken the time to take it slow and develop a true friendship without the physical part and I feel in my gut that this is right.

Is this common with a libra? Does this sound about right?



I'm not getting my hopes up - in the best way possible. But I'm also positive, and at the same time not getting too invested in this. I've got a lot on my plate right now and he's working on his plate.

This guy definitely knows that I've never been a patient one.

But I apologized for the way I'd been in the past. And for the first time, I held my self accountable for my actions all those years. And you could tell he appreciated that.

I was bossy when we were together and I commended him for putting up with that for as long as he did.

But does this seem genuine?

Because it sure feels pure and right.

And I like how we both just stopped it.

It was literally an agreed decision.

I'm just so blown away by that conclusion and I'd like to get other opinions.

Anyways. Any input is good.

Tldr?

I read the first few paragraphs and stopped. Sounds like a very tumultuous "relationship". Too much has happened.

From what I've read it seems he's unsure about you hence the back and forth thing in the past and the current slow dance. Also makes me think he's been using you for sex. Do you really need this in your life? Especially since you are now a mom?

It's familiar youve done this forever... My first love was like this.. It's either gonna work out or not.decide what you want and then move slowly toward the outcome. Also have a real conversation with him.

This story is like all the other Leo women who come here about their Libras- trying to FORCE shit to work when it won't. We need a sticky thread for all the Leo women who do this SAME shit with Libra dudes.

"Read this and leave the rest of the forum alone with your batshit crazy ways."

Overall, it doesn't matter what anyone says here. You're just going to continue the cycle no matter what you're told, because Leo girl. Srs emphasis on "girl."

i think your history of dysfunctional dynamics will be your undoing. you feel positive now but i'm sure you felt positive all those times before as well.

unfortunately i suspect this is bound to have you both repeating the same old same old eventually.

we grow up but we never really change.

Posted by jeane
i think your history of dysfunctional dynamics will be your undoing. you feel positive now but i'm sure you felt positive all those times before as well.

unfortunately i suspect this is bound to have you both repeating the same old same old eventually.

+1