Have you ever?

Important question: have you ever accidentally congratulated a woman for a pregnancy when they, in fact, were not pregnant?

Apparently, i just have...😅😔

Asking for a friend.

Uh oh....

I think someone may have implied that I was pregnant. I told her I was just big. But she doesn't speak very good English so... I feel like if you have a chance to be asked this question, you might rehearse it in your head. But it's thanks to you that they do it hahaha. 😛😛

Many years ago, I thought of saying it to someone, but I stopped myself. It turns out, she wasn't......so it worked out for me lol.

Everything has been strange ever since that day.

I'm going to tell my friend that I should probably do something to atone, lol! 😅

Never. My very first job I worked in a craft store with a woman who had a very big belly due to some pretty serious medical condition. Customers would congratulate her every day and I would have to watch her awkwardly explain she wasn’t pregnant and she was waiting for a liver transplant. Scared me out of ever congratulating anyone on their pregnancy

Posted by PilatesBod
Never. My very first job I worked in a craft store with a woman who had a very big belly due to some pretty serious medical condition. Customers would congratulate her every day and I would have to watch her awkwardly explain she wasn’t pregnant and she was waiting for a liver transplant. Scared me out of ever congratulating anyone on their pregnancy

Talk about a lesson learned! 💡

Posted by WarAngel79
Important question: have you ever accidentally congratulated a woman for a pregnancy when they, in fact, were not pregnant?

Apparently, i just have...😅😔

Asking for a friend.

Aha! So you want to get her preggo? 😂 Nice move

Unfortunately no. I'm not usually known as the congratulating type

Good thing i don't believe that pregnancies are ever something to congratulate xD

I would never ever assume someone was pregnant unless she said so. Tactless

Posted by Jumpin_Jupiter
Unfortunately no. I'm not usually known as the congratulating type

The "unfortunately" is sending me xD

Posted by MidAtBest
Good thing i don't believe that pregnancies are ever something to congratulate xD

I would never ever assume someone was pregnant unless she said so. Tactless

U should B Grateful, Gem

Water under the bridge now, thank goodness!

Yes OH MY GOD

This friend of mine whom i have not seen for YEARS... made a facebook post ..

And it said THIS

'' I don't need to buy my husband an anniversary present I cook and clean and handwash his shirts for him and of course now i will carry on his genes to the next generation *Smiley Face Smiley Face*''

So being a logically minded NORMAL person I thought this was slightly odd but OK you do you .. but i read this as her saying i am pregnant.

Bear in mind this friend is always saying how important motherhood is and how that is what life is about.

So the next time we have a friend gathering.. we ALL congratulate her... congrats you must be so happy you always wanted this .. etc etc.

EVERYONE in our friend group congratulates her

Then she waits until this is all over. She says 'Did you guys all think I was pregnant?'

We go 'um well yeah'

She gives his half smile ( i remember her expression so well because it was ODD)

And she says ' No'.

So we kind of don't know what to say because what if SHE WAS pregnant and miscarried etc.

So one friend says what we all think something to the effect of.. 'well we hope you are ok that is the main thing and we are here if you need us you dont need to tell us but if something happened we hope you are ok etc etc'

She then smiles and said 'No i was never pregnant'.

We just drop it. It was so odd. I get the impression she wanted people to think she was. I don't know why.

She has two kids now.

But that is the ONLY time .. because unless someone TELLS me they are pregnant i say nothing because ... you dont know.

IVF can make the tummy swell up etc and people can miscarry or simply not be ready to tell you for months.

But this time it really seemed to me she was saying ' I am carrying my husband's child'.

So now unless she explicitly says I am pregnant i am carrying.. i dont say anything.

And if you think that all this seemed weird .. yes it seemed weird to us too.

Posted by Textosmoon
Yes OH MY GOD

This friend of mine whom i have not seen for YEARS... made a facebook post ..

And it said THIS

'' I don't need to buy my husband an anniversary present I cook and clean and handwash his shirts for him and of course now i will carry on his genes to the next generation *Smiley Face Smiley Face*''

So being a logically minded NORMAL person I thought this was slightly odd but OK you do you .. but i read this as her saying i am pregnant.

Bear in mind this friend is always saying how important motherhood is and how that is what life is about.

So the next time we have a friend gathering.. we ALL congratulate her... congrats you must be so happy you always wanted this .. etc etc.

EVERYONE in our friend group congratulates her

Then she waits until this is all over. She says 'Did you guys all think I was pregnant?'

We go 'um well yeah'

She gives his half smile ( i remember her expression so well because it was ODD)

And she says ' No'.

So we kind of don't know what to say because what if SHE WAS pregnant and miscarried etc.

So one friend says what we all think something to the effect of.. 'well we hope you are ok that is the main thing and we are here if you need us you dont need to tell us but if something happened we hope you are ok etc etc'

She then smiles and said 'No i was never pregnant'.

We just drop it. It was so odd. I get the impression she wanted people to think she was. I don't know why.

She has two kids now.

But that is the ONLY time .. because unless someone TELLS me they are pregnant i say nothing because ... you dont know.

IVF can make the tummy swell up etc and people can miscarry or simply not be ready to tell you for months.

But this time it really seemed to me she was saying ' I am carrying my husband's child'.

So now unless she explicitly says I am pregnant i am carrying.. i dont say anything.

And if you think that all this seemed weird .. yes it seemed weird to us too.

Thank god she has a sort of similar body type to me tho... maybe i am a bit skinnier tbh .. but can you imagine—

She deffo wanted that to happen on purpose not sure if she wanted attention or if she was merely sort of manifesting her intent or if she was trying to put people on the wrong foot .. i dunno

If she was manifesting an intention that is fine. Not sure tho

Posted by Textosmoon

Posted by Textosmoon
Yes OH MY GOD

This friend of mine whom i have not seen for YEARS... made a facebook post ..

And it said THIS

'' I don't need to buy my husband an anniversary present I cook and clean and handwash his shirts for him and of course now i will carry on his genes to the next generation *Smiley Face Smiley Face*''

So being a logically minded NORMAL person I thought this was slightly odd but OK you do you .. but i read this as her saying i am pregnant.

Bear in mind this friend is always saying how important motherhood is and how that is what life is about.

So the next time we have a friend gathering.. we ALL congratulate her... congrats you must be so happy you always wanted this .. etc etc.

EVERYONE in our friend group congratulates her

Then she waits until this is all over. She says 'Did you guys all think I was pregnant?'

We go 'um well yeah'

She gives his half smile ( i remember her expression so well because it was ODD)

And she says ' No'.

So we kind of don't know what to say because what if SHE WAS pregnant and miscarried etc.

So one friend says what we all think something to the effect of.. 'well we hope you are ok that is the main thing and we are here if you need us you dont need to tell us but if something happened we hope you are ok etc etc'

She then smiles and said 'No i was never pregnant'.

We just drop it. It was so odd. I get the impression she wanted people to think she was. I don't know why.

She has two kids now.

But that is the ONLY time .. because unless someone TELLS me they are pregnant i say nothing because ... you dont know.

IVF can make the tummy swell up etc and people can miscarry or simply not be ready to tell you for months.

But this time it really seemed to me she was saying ' I am carrying my husband's child'.

So now unless she explicitly says I am pregnant i am carrying.. i dont say anything.

And if you think that all this seemed weird .. yes it seemed weird to us too.

Thank god she has a sort of similar body type to me tho... maybe i am a bit skinnier tbh .. but can you imagine—

She deffo wanted that to happen on purpose not sure if she wanted attention or if she was merely sort of manifesting her intent or if she was trying to put people on the wrong foot .. i dunno

If she was manifesting an intention that is fine. Not sure tho

click to expand

Also sorry for going on but it was so weird.

But ON the facebook post ..people were saying Congrats Congrats we know you waited so long etc.

Now i wouldnt expect her to correct it on FB etc she doesnt owe anything. But i would expect her to say something when we next saw her to say actually you misunderstood..

English is her second language so maybe it was that?

She was russian and they are very traditional.

But the whole post was on the anniversary of her wedding and it was to say PUBLICALLY for some reason she doesnt feel the need to get hubby a pressie (fine no worries no judgement) because she is doing his housework and she carries his genes to the next generation??

I cant rememeber if she said I will carry or i am carrying ...

But to ME .. this says .. i am pregnant? Or am i crazy??

Anyway .. it was awkward. Friends and i were like .. oh.. did she want us to look like we were being rude ? Or is she tricking us .. or was it just she mispoke or expressing intent?

Anyway maybe i over thought it. It was weird tho.. and i remember my girlfriends after saying 'yeah no that is weird'.

I dunno. Maybe she just really wanted it.

Posted by Textosmoon

Posted by Textosmoon

Posted by Textosmoon
Yes OH MY GOD

This friend of mine whom i have not seen for YEARS... made a facebook post ..

And it said THIS

'' I don't need to buy my husband an anniversary present I cook and clean and handwash his shirts for him and of course now i will carry on his genes to the next generation *Smiley Face Smiley Face*''

So being a logically minded NORMAL person I thought this was slightly odd but OK you do you .. but i read this as her saying i am pregnant.

Bear in mind this friend is always saying how important motherhood is and how that is what life is about.

So the next time we have a friend gathering.. we ALL congratulate her... congrats you must be so happy you always wanted this .. etc etc.

EVERYONE in our friend group congratulates her

Then she waits until this is all over. She says 'Did you guys all think I was pregnant?'

We go 'um well yeah'

She gives his half smile ( i remember her expression so well because it was ODD)

And she says ' No'.

So we kind of don't know what to say because what if SHE WAS pregnant and miscarried etc.

So one friend says what we all think something to the effect of.. 'well we hope you are ok that is the main thing and we are here if you need us you dont need to tell us but if something happened we hope you are ok etc etc'

She then smiles and said 'No i was never pregnant'.

We just drop it. It was so odd. I get the impression she wanted people to think she was. I don't know why.

She has two kids now.

But that is the ONLY time .. because unless someone TELLS me they are pregnant i say nothing because ... you dont know.

IVF can make the tummy swell up etc and people can miscarry or simply not be ready to tell you for months.

But this time it really seemed to me she was saying ' I am carrying my husband's child'.

So now unless she explicitly says I am pregnant i am carrying.. i dont say anything.

And if you think that all this seemed weird .. yes it seemed weird to us too.

Thank god she has a sort of similar body type to me tho... maybe i am a bit skinnier tbh .. but can you imagine—

She deffo wanted that to happen on purpose not sure if she wanted attention or if she was merely sort of manifesting her intent or if she was trying to put people on the wrong foot .. i dunno

If she was manifesting an intention that is fine. Not sure thoclick to expand

Also sorry for going on but it was so weird.

But ON the facebook post ..people were saying Congrats Congrats we know you waited so long etc.

Now i wouldnt expect her to correct it on FB etc she doesnt owe anything. But i would expect her to say something when we next saw her to say actually you misunderstood..

English is her second language so maybe it was that?

She was russian and they are very traditional.

But the whole post was on the anniversary of her wedding and it was to say PUBLICALLY for some reason she doesnt feel the need to get hubby a pressie (fine no worries no judgement) because she is doing his housework and she carries his genes to the next generation??

I cant rememeber if she said I will carry or i am carrying ...

But to ME .. this says .. i am pregnant? Or am i crazy??

Anyway .. it was awkward. Friends and i were like .. oh.. did she want us to look like we were being rude ? Or is she tricking us .. or was it just she mispoke or expressing intent?

Anyway maybe i over thought it. It was weird tho.. and i remember my girlfriends after saying 'yeah no that is weird'.

I dunno. Maybe she just really wanted it.

click to expand

Anyway I stress she wasn't big .. she was almost as skinny as me... and i never would have said anything without the facebook post and lots of people congratulating her on the post and in person at the get together

So i really dont feel its my fault.

Also .. another thing.. when they DID get pregnant they told every RIGHT away like the day or something instead of waiting 3 months like you do.. not that its wrong i just thought it was weird.

I guess they really wanted it.

I never see her now .. i do see the husband sometimes he still hangs with the friend group.

We do ask her out but she never comes i dont think she likes us.. or maybe she has to be with the kids.

I never got the impression she liked us or me she was always like 'oh these silly naive people that my husband knows'

Or like we were the weirdos i dunno. Maybe i project my own insecurities on to her very possible.

SHe was never bad or anything just an off vibe maybe. But then you dont have to be friends with people just cuz your husband was but then she would be like oh you guys never come out or visit etc.

Hard to read her.

Oh and the next time i see her which i will have to at some point i KNOW what she will say 'OH i have not seen you in so long you never visited .. etc etc.. but my brother DID visit and she basically left the house while my brother talked to her husband'.

I dont think she likes spending time with people she just likes the idea that people think she is suffering or her life is so hard. Or wants us to feel guilty. I dunno.

Also she is Russian and FIRMLY pro russian .. used to have family or an elderly relative in the east of ukraine.. i think that has affected her.

Always been something ... just a bit off with her. I dont think she wishes me well. Well I wish her well .. but not accepting her negative vibes and attempts to humiliate people in public and make shit ugly or awkward for certain people. There are OTHER things i could mention.

A close friend of ours married a transwoman and she was snide about it. And said things that were over the line.

Also she is against gay marriage and our group has gay friends .. everyone has always been kind to her and included her etc and basically helped in what way we can or offered to. Maybe she does not relate to us as we are liberals or whatever.

But honestly some of her behaviour .. is very ill mannered and odd. And its not a cultural thing i know many russians who are lovely polite and tolerant people.

I know she had a tough life tho.. so sending her love and light but not accepting her negativity. Nor her guilt trips. Although not sure her parents were THAT tough because i had said some of the things she has said in polite conversation i think i would have had my jaw broken by my parents tbh.



Wow that turned into a whole thing!

Oh no..

Not really, I'm always careful not to say anything just in case.