Love in Rom Coms Vs Love in Gay Movies

Saw "A Single Man" yesterday.

Quite a movie. It's about this gay guy who loses his partner and plans to commit suicide. Has an ironic ending, indeed.

Few weeks ago I saw "I Love You Phillip Morris" with Jim Carrey as a gay guy who falls in love with another gay guy in prison. Good movie, as well.

Anyway, I like chicks, let's get that clear.

I like big butts and I can not lie...

But... something about the relationships the actors had in those gay movies felt more... TRUE than any old romcom I can recall.

In aquarius fashion, I did some thinking... and I realised what it was that felt odd.

With romcoms it's usually the same story:

Guy and girl meet, become attracted to each other, fall in love, have a big argument - usually due to something the girl finds wrong with the guy - then guy comes crawling back at the end, begging to be taken back, is taken back, FIN.

In other words it's about EXPECTATIONS, CONFLICT and after SUBMISSION. And it's always the guy doing the submitting.

I thought back to the scenes in "A Single Man" where Colin Firth and the guy from "Watch Men" were together (when I wasn't hiding behind my hands when they were all lovey dovey):

There were two scenes in which there was the faintest glimmer of conflict between the two, during two seperate conversations about women (one about Watch Men guy's mum, the other about Colin's female friend).

But it was gone in a flash.

Mind you these are two big blokes, so getting into an argument and coming to blows would be really easy gay or no.

And I realised what it was that made me feel the love was more true.

The lack of coflict, of expectaions. The pure acceptance of the other person, even though it was an older man younger man scenario.

The TRUST the two had between each other (even though Coin Firth admitted he'd slept with the lady friend his partner was asking about).

I realise all I got were glimpses intPerhaps I'm just lazy. But for me passion doesn't equal conflict or jealousy or anger.

You can say "in real life relationships aren't relationships without passion, without good times and bad".

I'll believe you.

But then I'd reply by saying "I don't want a relationship, then. I want love".

And I've realised what love is. I was taught it by a fucking gay movie for christ's sake! And now I know what I'd like in love:

Serenity in her company, acceptance...

And a fucking great rack and rump (this one is optional, mind).

Julianne Moore - that was her name!

She looked stunning in "A Single Man".

She's got a very sexual mouth, she has.

Very attractive lips.

Posted by SatoriFierce
yeah, I love a good romantic flick, but it's usually the tearjerkers that I resonate the most with. Very few romantic comedies really get to me.

I loved Brokeback Mountain. I thought it was incredibly romantic, tragic and real.

Is "A Single Man" a comedy? I just think it's more about that than anything for me.

However, one of my fav love stories is "Punch-Drunk Love" and that's sorta a dark comedy, right?

Oh, and "True Romance" is a fav too.

Nah, it's a drama. "I LOVE YOU PM" was a comedy ish.

It's funny you should mention Punch Drunk and True Romance because I personally felt the romance wasn't realistic LOL

They're like "She's Out of My League", you know? Written for the down-on-his-luck male market?

I may be wrong or just cynical.

But with hetero relationships it's like REAL rare for the two parties to just accept the other for who they are.

In movies AND real life.

And that sucks. Even if it's more realistic and how we as human beings are.

All we really have - when it comes down to it - is hope.

You know I actually think people generally settle. You know, like "I have a husband/wife, yay me!" type of situation.

They're loving for other people to see. Not for themselves.

I'm rambling...

Maybe my wanting serenity is an ideal, an expectation and in a way a form of me wanting submission in this ideal partner.

Maybe there's no such thing as unconditional love between lovers, gay or straight.

Maybe we can only fake it and the lucky get to fake it with people they can actually stand and who can stand them.

Maybe if we lift the veil on ideas of love, success, religion, friendship, loyalty, civilization and other things that make us human and look, really LOOK at what we're left with, we're pretty much f**ked at the end of the day.

Because what we will see is NOTHING. It only matters if we make it matter.

That is so sad and f**ked up.

I thought I knew the point of life, once: "Some are here to do amazing things and some are here to witness amazing things"?

Now I'm not so sure...

wanna get a room cowboy?

Boom-chicka-mow-mow. LOLOL

Posted by Beetleguese
It's the Hollywood script machine pumping out the same tired old shit to the masses because that's what sells, try browsing through the indie movies and you'll often find some gems where the writer and director actually took the time to be original or at least depart from the tired old cliches.

Absolutely! That's what I don't like about American movies, but just love about a lot of Foreign films. It's not all of life wrapped up in some pretty BS ribbon. It's life stuff that's not always pretty, but it's real. While this movie is not a romance, per se, "Monsieur Hire" (French movie) about a murdered young woman; a voyuer...the movie is divine.
"Le Retour de Martin Guerre," again, I wouldn't necessarily call this a romantic movie; however, it was very romantic in parts, and certainly didn't end the way I thought it would! I could go on, but I won't. My mom and I were talking about this several years ago, that more women (generalising) have unrealistic expectations of relationships because of these damn Debeers commercials; Zales commercials; frolicking on the beach commercials, etc. That's not to say that these things don't happen from time to time, but relationships are NOT frolicking on the beach everyday and whispering "I love you" every five minute (which would personally make me gag).
I guess we all like to watch movies from time to time that are completely unrealistic and light-hearted; however, I really do love to see movies that don't try to wrap everything into "perfection." I'm completely imperfect, so I can relate to the bizzare and strange things out there, because I am not, nor will I ever pretend to be perfect.

You'd think I'd be a big romance movie watcher but I'm not. I prefer the books.

Posted by Amandus
You'd think I'd be a big romance movie watcher but I'm not. I prefer the books.

Books are better, it all happens up here. *tapping head*

hay I know what movie ur talking about now!!!!.......i saw the reveiw for it ages ago and colin firth is in it and I got a bit of a thing for him lol and...julianne moor looked soo fucking cool in its so 60s retro kitch i love it.

cant wait to see it

Posted by The_eleventh_sign_11
hay I know what movie ur talking about now!!!!.......i saw the reveiw for it ages ago and colin firth is in it and I got a bit of a thing for him lol and...julianne moor looked soo fucking cool in its so 60s retro kitch i love it.

cant wait to see it

Yeah, I can't believe she's 49. Not that anybody cares but I'd do her.