Roommates from h e l l

Most of us have had the amazing opportunity to have roommates. I've had several. In most cases, they left me asking myself- could it be me, seriously? I don't even know where to start. My first roommate was a pisces with a cap moon. Pretty girl, smart, fun but she made it very clear that I was a "subletter" and would be moving in 6 months. Now I was totally chill with that, didn't need her to be my friend, but her distaste of me made things awkward. Like for instance, i had a statue of Mary on the fireplace, I took her Jewish statue and placed it next to mine (we were unpacking and I asked permission to touch it). I then said, oh this is so cool-we can have like a mixture. Her mom (was there because we just moved in-freshmen year), promptly asked me to move my statue and put it in my room. I was like what?!!! lol. The weirdest part is that her mom is a therapist!!!
I mean with her (roommate 1) it was more petty things all along. I think I could have been more mature, and compared to the other roommates I've had she was great-lol. My second roommate was a sag lesbian model. We actually met at a shoot, and she seemed really nice. I'm not a lesbian, but people's expression of sexuality does not bother me whatsoever-EXCEPT when its really loud on a school night-lol. I ended up moving out of that apt not so much because of her but because of the constant music playing by our dead beat, non-school attending neighbors. The next place I moved was a really nice high rise. Roof top pool, loved it. This is when the crazies really started moving in....

What about you, any crazy roomies??

+1

I've got something... I'll post em lates tho... you kids have fun now..

Posted by Lobo
I've got something... I'll post em lates tho... you kids have fun now..

+2

my roommate tried to stab me.

then threatened to get me evicted. *scratches head*

it was so unprovoked...about ten minutes after the event i started laughing and couldn't stop. but at the time i went into fight-or-flight-mode. she had knocked on my door because my music was loud and i had a few people over. i said, 'fine i'll turn it down. no worries. and everyone will be out by 11.' she didn't move. so i asked, 'is there a problem?' she turned into her room and reappeared with a kitchen knife.

i dunno, maybe it was PMS.

omg, thats so crazy

Posted by everevolvingepithet
This housemate used to rarely pay his part of the bills (when he did he drip fed the money and never in full), all the while treating himself to nice stuff all the time. He used to leave dirty cutlery for days on end knowing full well someone else would do it. Eat all the nice food and not replace it, or leave one slice of bread,a drop of milk so he 'hadn't had the last bit'. So we fucked him up.
All the dirty cutlery in his bed before we went out to all-night raves, swapping sugar for salt, hiding his stuff for weeks on end or moving it around to stupid places in the house (like, just one shoe), cooking a meal together then including him out if he was in his room (pretending we thought he was out). One day he came into the living room and just burst out crying hahaha.

oh wow. LOL

psychological terrorists 😛

i hate people who do the leaving the last drop, last bite of food thing. yes, you have technically finished it. let's not clutch at straws -_-

Posted by PunkyBruiser
omg Nim... O_o I would have called the police on her ass!

i did! and she was promptly evicted 😄 *tap dances*

Posted by nimbue

Posted by everevolvingepithet
This housemate used to rarely pay his part of the bills (when he did he drip fed the money and never in full), all the while treating himself to nice stuff all the time. He used to leave dirty cutlery for days on end knowing full well someone else would do it. Eat all the nice food and not replace it, or leave one slice of bread,a drop of milk so he 'hadn't had the last bit'. So we fucked him up.
All the dirty cutlery in his bed before we went out to all-night raves, swapping sugar for salt, hiding his stuff for weeks on end or moving it around to stupid places in the house (like, just one shoe), cooking a meal together then including him out if he was in his room (pretending we thought he was out). One day he came into the living room and just burst out crying hahaha.

oh wow. LOL

psychological terrorists 😛

i hate people who do the leaving the last drop, last bite of food thing. yes, you have technically finished it. let's not clutch at straws -_-

click to expand

The best is when you're a vegan and your roommates are POSITIVE that you drank their milk. UM HELLO

Posted by TastesOfChaos


....and the other (cusper) was just a fat lazy piece of shit.... found her dirty used condoms everywhere when I was cleaning the place up...

used condoms——

WHO
IS
ROOTING
THESE
PEOPLE——

Posted by tryandguess

Posted by nimbue

Posted by everevolvingepithet
This housemate used to rarely pay his part of the bills (when he did he drip fed the money and never in full), all the while treating himself to nice stuff all the time. He used to leave dirty cutlery for days on end knowing full well someone else would do it. Eat all the nice food and not replace it, or leave one slice of bread,a drop of milk so he 'hadn't had the last bit'. So we fucked him up.
All the dirty cutlery in his bed before we went out to all-night raves, swapping sugar for salt, hiding his stuff for weeks on end or moving it around to stupid places in the house (like, just one shoe), cooking a meal together then including him out if he was in his room (pretending we thought he was out). One day he came into the living room and just burst out crying hahaha.

oh wow. LOL

psychological terrorists 😛

i hate people who do the leaving the last drop, last bite of food thing. yes, you have technically finished it. let's not clutch at straws -_-

The best is when you're a vegan and your roommates are POSITIVE that you drank their milk. UM HELLO

click to expand

that calls for this:



no, i didn't drink your cow juice. now shut up and get on with your life. >.

we had a guy once - just in from London (obviously had a bad curry or 2 over there) who would always come home from shopping with those industrial sized packets of loo paper - like 20 rolls in the pack.
Must have gotten caught out once and the experience scarred him for life.

My roommate is an Aquarius w/ Aries Rising & Libra Moon.

I have never met someone who loves to talk about herself non-stop like her. OMG. I do my best to listen and fake interest but I usually start thinking about stabbing my eye with the nearest sharp object. Yep, that would be more fun.

Id move out if I wasnt totally in love with her doggie! *giggle*

I've got a few interesting roommate storys, but I dive in to why I don't dig on female roommates anymore. Well their were originally four girls in a 2 room 2 bath apt. Two girls had moved out and one of my friends (a guy) had moved in, and asked me to join as to split the rent four ways. I was like win win right, wrong. Long story shorted I had to deal with endless nagging about cooking meat from the british vegeterian one, and the sheltered bible thumping black chic would always preached to anyone that with an ear. Lucky me, I caught the attention of the british one (sigh). She was like a attack dog, at first it was light hearted and flirty (one sided) then it quickly became uncomforatable to come home cause I just freaking knew she would be their. She tried to walk in on me why I was taking a bath like twice, then the breaking point was when I woke up with her on top of me and her (crazy as hell)face looking down at me. I pushed her off of me and was like you came into my room and got in my bed and climbed on top of me, really? I told her bf and he just said and I quote" Well she likes you man, but I trust her we love each other" I thought (wtf) dude stop hitting the bong so much. My friend didn't have a job so he moved back with his parents and I paid his part and my part. Little miss wholesome got some poor guy sent to prision for rape. She met up for a date at like 11 at night, they had sex her mother somehow found out all of a sudden she was raped..... That's the short version... oh and the british girl gave her bf v.d. ewwwwww.

Well I'm off to the club. I'll share another lobo short next time...🙂

From next week on I'll have no housemate anymore 😄 Im moving to my own apartment yayyyyyyyyyyyy

I don't really have any cool stories. But my scorpio ex roomed with a lesbian who had two cats and literally cat stuff every where.

Needless to say, she liked pussy 😛

Posted by everevolvingepithet
Ouch, harsh story lobo.
It's even worse when women live together and seem to 'sync up' when they're on the rag, total chaos.:/

OMG bling! you know it's just horrible😢 It's like in in the cage fight for my life. I hate when they get emo over anything and make you the villain!!!— tossers!! I've got two more girl story's to tell then I'll get too the guys and the gay dude....... sighs..

It's like being in a *

Posted by BoomShakalakaBoom
From next week on I'll have no housemate anymore 😄 Im moving to my own apartment yayyyyyyyyyyyy

Good on Boom!!!!! Don't party too much in your solo pad now🙂

Ah female roommie story #2 coming right up>>>>> (short ver.) Well I had a sweet studio apt, and to save money I opted for a 2 bed room duplex for six months. I met with this punker girl and it seemed like a good plan. We both moved in and proceeded to lay ground rules for each other. It was all gravy until she got a bf, I didn't mind her friends coming over and walking around toppless to try to get a "rise" out of me, or them blazing trees in her room whateve that's her scene and business. But When I wake up to go to my kitchen to get cearal and there is a stark naked ass dude, wait I'm sorry he had an apron on cooking eggs well.... Then I come home and I notice as my hair at the time was red and orange, blonde strains of hair in my bed. Upon closer inspection there were dried "love stains" on my sheets wtf! This is when I was doing my 2 year A sexual celibacy phase so I know it wasn't my handy work, no pun intended there😛. I politly ask her about it, and she ws like "oh yeah we fucked in your bed, your bathroom, the kitchen, and I broke your lamp" At they point I had a flash of seeing myself choke the fuck out of her, but I said blah blah blah my personal boundries and disrespect, the whole spill. So later her bathroom toliet wasn't working or something, so I let her use mine. She graciously thanked me by leaving her fem products uncovered in my bathroom trash can. I grap her by her force her into my bathroom and say "get it"! The next day There is a note on my door stating that we need to talk. I calmly sit down with she and her bf. They wanted me to pay for the month's rent then move out because "I'm unstable" and her bf move in with his other lady friend or whatever. I thought UNFUCKINGBELIEVABLE.... She convinced the apt manager that she was innocent and I was a violent misogynistic freak. The police were hovering outside and she just started (staged) screaming and yelling "I just want you to leave, We don't want trouble". I was like Fuck it I'm digging in and staying.>>> long story short I apperently broke the conditions of the lease and was asked to leave by mgt.

Thinking back on it... The only victory I got was "agressively negotiating" said payment of new sheets with her bf.

Posted by Lobo
Ah female roommie story #2 coming right up>>>>> (short ver.) Well I had a sweet studio apt, and to save money I opted for a 2 bed room duplex for six months. I met with this punker girl and it seemed like a good plan. We both moved in and proceeded to lay ground rules for each other. It was all gravy until she got a bf, I didn't mind her friends coming over and walking around toppless to try to get a "rise" out of me, or them blazing trees in her room whateve that's her scene and business. But When I wake up to go to my kitchen to get cearal and there is a stark naked ass dude, wait I'm sorry he had an apron on cooking eggs well.... Then I come home and I notice as my hair at the time was red and orange, blonde strains of hair in my bed. Upon closer inspection there were dried "love stains" on my sheets wtf! This is when I was doing my 2 year A sexual celibacy phase so I know it wasn't my handy work, no pun intended there😛. I politly ask her about it, and she ws like "oh yeah we fucked in your bed, your bathroom, the kitchen, and I broke your lamp" At they point I had a flash of seeing myself choke the fuck out of her, but I said blah blah blah my personal boundries and disrespect, the whole spill. So later her bathroom toliet wasn't working or something, so I let her use mine. She graciously thanked me by leaving her fem products uncovered in my bathroom trash can. I grap her by her force her into my bathroom and say "get it"! The next day There is a note on my door stating that we need to talk. I calmly sit down with she and her bf. They wanted me to pay for the month's rent then move out because "I'm unstable" and her bf move in with his other lady friend or whatever. I thought UNFUCKINGBELIEVABLE.... She convinced the apt manager that she was innocent and I was a violent misogynistic freak. The police were hovering outside and she just started (staged) screaming and yelling "I just want you to leave, We don't want trouble". I was like Fuck it I'm digging in and staying.>>> long story short I apperently broke the conditions of the lease and was asked to leave by mgt.

how did they break the lamp?

I'm assuming some crazy sex where they were all over my room. I will get into my other roommate from hell stories a bit later...

The one who I found out went to prison for killing a guy with a hammer

Two or three who were so high or so spacey that they would go to bed with the oven on

The one who went snow sledding on my dinnerware and broke it all

The one who kept letting my dog out to run in the road because "animals shouldn't be in slavery"

The one who insisted I eat nothing but a mixture of raw egg and avocado

Several who broke my things and felt no obligation to replace them

The one who would make dinner and accidentally include poisonous plants he gathered (found out AFTER I ate)

The one who stopped paying rent, with no explanation, and got insulted when I kicked him out 2 months later

The one who got pissed at me and covered my bed in salt

Various guys who turned out to be heroine or meth dealers

Various experts of mental torture

Posted by Nights22
Never leave a sag alone in the kitchen.

lmao this is so true

I always put pasta on and walk away and forget about it until I hear the crackling of it burning to the bottom of the pot......

This is my first time ever having a roommate...besides my Libra or my sister....

I met her through a friend of mine in my program...haven't known either of them that long...only since the Summer.
She's a Cap...the girl who introduced us is a Cancer (she lives next door with a Libra girl who kind of annoys me actually)

Anyways, she's pretty clean and really really REALLY friendly.
Which is a little uhhhhhh sometimes...cause she will like knock on my door and be like hey I'm coming in...and I'm like greatttt 😄 I have no bra on and you can see my nipples and this is fucking awkward...lmao talking to me about coffee and shit. She drinks a lot of coffee. The house smells like Starbucks I swear.

I feel like I'm living with my grandparents in a way cause they are both Caps and the similarities are just ridiculous.

Posted by everevolvingepithet
..and I thought I was bad with burning eggs lol.

Lol yah dude I don't understand...I do it EVERY time.
You'd think I'd learn

I had a roommate once that had been using cocaine and we didnt know he was addicted.
When he would disappear on payday, he would tell us , he was hanging out with some girl and strip clubs.

Well come to find out, he had developed a huge coke addiction, he hid it very well.
I didnt really suspect anything cause i thought he was smarter than to try cocaine, being that I had shared the stories of coke-head girls jerking off drug dealer dogs for coke and crack. And how i saw normal people in my building go from weed to coke to suddenly crack and how i witnessed normal folk turn to zombies tahnks to crack.

Anyhow.......he began using crack. But he never smoked it at home.
He would only smoke weed with us. But i started to notice his face getting scabs like the crackheads in my old neighborhood. Well one day, I went looking for my metal bowl to smoke some weed and I couldnt find it. It disappeared and thought it was weird that i would have misplaced it. So i bought another one.

One day i was helping the roommate that shared rooms with "cracky" and we found my bowl under "cracky's" mattress.
I was like , what the fuck is that doing there? I grabbed it and looked in it and saw white shit....I smelled and it was crack.
Imagine had I just packed the bowl and smoked....!!!!!! I could have been addicted to crack!!!!
I would have killed him myself!!!
So yeah...the moral of the story is.........watch for behavoir changes and look before you light up!

Posted by DazedScorp
....

Two saggys, Two scorps, and a Leo.

All out war! It got ugly.

Did that young lady ever pay the bills? Just curious 🙂