What makes you fall in love?

This topic is compliments of Suzi-Q. I thought id start a new thread for it as it deserves a mention. This is what she wrote:

"What makes you fall in love? What qualities do you want in a mate—"

Well, i will be the first to answer. I don't think i 'fall in love'. I am a hard basket. I more often fall in lust or pity. I find myself feeling sorry for people and mistake this for love. I have been in love once or twice in my life and it was nice. The thing that would make me fall in love is seeing the vulnerable side to a person.

The idea qualities i am looking for in a person is honesty, loyalty to the point of standing by you no matter what, hard working/direction in life, a positive attitude, kind and caring, untainted, innocent, fun, outgoing and socially adjusted. Ive been out with too many people who are socially unadjusted!

Physical qualities dont really bother me that much. I suppose someone who is good looking but not plastic, someone who at least keeps in shape (they dont have to be an excercise junky, but someone who has enough self respect to look after themselves), someone who showers at least once a day, someone who is spunky, sexy and cheeky, someone who has 'front' and a bit of audacity. Physical attributes dont matter to me in one sense, but i do believe you need to be extremely attracted to the person, or else it is no more than a friendship.

You cant have one without the other. You cant have physical attraction without compatability and you cant be compatable without an attraction. It all works together. If i find someone attractive as a person, then i usually find them physically attractive too.

My idea mate would be no more than a few inches shorter or taller than me.

Ok, physical attraction does appeal to me a bit, but not in an aesthetic way. Eg. I dont 'go' for a particular eye colour or anything like that.
Ok guys, time to answer the question...

Those words were meant to be "ideal". For some reason, it is not posting the "l", or maybe its me, hehe.

What is socially adjusted mean? LOL

Do you have to adjust yourself around people. For some reason I have the picture of pulling your underwwear from your ass when it gets wedged and you are looking around to make sure no one sees you doing it! Is that what you mean? Sounds like a pain in the ass! The only time I am 'soically adjusted' is at work and that is because they are paying me!!!

This is why I stay home! LOL

I can only take being socially adjusted in very small dosages.

Back to the topic!

What makes me fall in love with someone:

Personality would be number one and character. There would have to be a smoldering sexual attraction. You know the kind where you cant keep your hands off them! You just want to eat them up! What would make me want to do that is, someone dark and sexy who makes me laugh alot who is interesting. He knows who he is and is fine with it and someone who is not stuck up and is serious about things that are important, but can cut loose and have fun. Dependable and solid. Someone very private, someone protective and responsible/hardworking and good with finances. A good decision maker and A good heart!

~someone strong enough to be with me(I know I am not the easiest person to deal with.)

Summary-- someone who is protective and loving, loyal, private, compassionate, fun, sexy, sensitive.

I have never fallen in love with someone because I pitied them, and I would be heartbroken if someone did that to me! That would be the last thing I would want! I am not a charity case and if I wanted someone, that would not be a problem. I think sometimes I am waiting for perfection. I do have faith in love and I think that when the time is right it will happen. When it does, I will do everything in my power to make it work out!!!

It is the little things that make me fall in love...little things that add up...I don't like a guy who comes on strong, hot and heavy...
For me, it is the smiles...the way he puts his hand on the small of my back...the way he proves that he listens to me by remembering details of my conversation...his relationship with other family members (children, parents, siblings)...I like to know he has a soft, caring side; that to me only enhances his masculinity! Looks play a very little part for me...although, I do prefer him to be taller and stronger than I am!

I think I pretty much agree with Alanis Morissette on who the ideal guy would be.

'Socially adjusted' means they know how to conduct themselves in public. It is the simple things like opening a door for you, asking how you are, being nice to your friends when being introduced. Not hard really. Pity ive bothered with too many people who aren't.

Want to share it with us, Morgan. I am not familiar what is her ideal man. I am interested to know what your ideal man would be like!

Princes Familiar - Alanis Morissette

please be philosophical
please be tapped into your femininity
please be able to take the wheel from me
please be crazy and curious
papa love your princess so that she will find loving princes familiar
papa cry for your princess so that she will find gentle princes familiar
please be a sexaholic
please be unpredictably miserable
please be self absorbed much (not the good kind)
please be addicted to some substance
papa listen to your princess so that she will find attentive princes familiar
papa hear your princess so that she will find curious princes familiar
please be the jerk of my knee i've fit you always
you finish my sentences I think I love you
what is your name again no matter i'm guessing your thoughts again correctly and I love the way
you press my buttons so much sometimes I could strangle you
papa laugh with your princess so that she will find funny princes familiar
papa respect your princess so that she will find respectful princes familiar
please be strangely enigmatic
please be just like my

21 Things I Want in a Lover - Alanis Morissette

Do you derive joy when someone else succeeds?
Do you not play dirty when engaged in competition?
Do you have a big intellectual capacity but know
That it alone does not equate wisdom?
Do you see everything as an illusion?
But enjoy it even though you are not of it?
Are you both masculine and feminine? politically aware?
And don't believe in capital punishment?

These are 21 things that I want in a lover
Not necessarily needs but qualities that I prefer

Do you derive joy from diving in and seeing that
Loving someone can actually feel like freedom? are you funny?
la self-deprecating? like adventure? and have many formed opinions?

These are 21 things that I want in a lover
Not necessarily needs but qualities that I prefer
I figure I can describe it since I have a choice in the matter
These are 21 things I choose to choose in a lover

I'm in no hurry I could wait forever
I'm in no rush cuz I like being solo
There are no worries and certainly no pressure in the meantime
I'll live like there's no tomorrow

Are you uninhibited in bed? more than three times a week?
Up for being experimental? are you athletic?
Are you thriving in a job that helps your brother? are you not addicted?
...curious and communicative...

HAH! I like it, alot! Sounds like she/you/me could be sista.