Are we entiltled to love though life...?

Upon finding this message board I was delighted to see so many people expressing their opinion because in my experiance this shows you care.

On further inspection though I was a little dissapointed (however not surprised) to find the bulk of the messages were based on brocken love interests, dissapointed ex-lovers and people with in my opinion...bad attitudes developed through a misconception that love lasts forever and on every occasion you think you've found it in this imperfect world.

I guess what I'm trying to say or ask to you out there is this...

Do you think we are automatically entitled to find love in this life time just because we have already been given the gift of life...

The reason I ask is that most of these postings and replies seem to be asking questions and sure that's one of the beauties of our lives...we have the power to converse and share...but

What I mean is this...
In my opinion we are all pointing fingers and asking questions to try and ease our insecurities based on our own self doubt. If we learned to live life properly and by that I mean learning to love ourselves first I reckon we would know the answeres to those questions, or better still never find ourselves in those situations that give rise to our self dobt and insecurities.

yes

Yes we are entitled to love or yes we should learn to live and thus learn how to love...which one...—

Ok. Do we really know what 'love' is? To me it is more than romance, attraction and 'having' someone there. It goes beyond a 'person'. It is a condition that transcends/permeates all boundries. It transcends time, distance, space and ideas. It can survive great cotastrofies.

A lot of the time we operate from our own needs. We use it as a tonic to relieve our feelings of inadequacy... We think, "if only i can fill that space...".

Unfortunatley people often mistake comfort and lust for 'love'. This is not the case.

The most fulfilling thing to me is if i can give love unconditionally. I find it liberating and rewarding. It doesnt happen often, as the mind has nothing to do with it, but sometimes you will be touched by something or someone and you just have these feelings of 'love' for them. It is not sexual or romantic, just empathetic or something. I think you have to give love to receive it.

Why sit around and wait for it?

Are we entitled to it? No, we're not entitled to anything. It is up to us whether or not we want to give it (love). It is rude and arrogant to think we have a god-given right to 'love' just because we are on this planet. What happened to 'working' for something?! The rewards are so much better.

I have had to lead a largely loveless life to realise these things but i am aware of it now and i want to become the source of love rather than sitting passively waiting for it to come.

These are just my thoughts. I am tired tonight so i will look at my post tomorrow and add stuff if i have to.

Keep asking the inspiring questions 204, you are really making me think and i need that

Oh gee, look at my spelling for 'catastrophe', I AM tired!

I have found love hard because i was never shown it and then it all ties in with control issues etc... I feel the only way to 'control' myself and others is to control my emotions. I am so in control, nobody ever guesses i am a libran, they always think i am a capricorn. I come across as icey cold and stoic but underneath it all i am an emotional wreck. I cant get the lid off it though, i dont know what to do. I'll just be myself i guess.

Who'd have thought this thread would go from love to control?!
Thank you,
210.50

Gee, you are right who would have guessed it would turn to control issues but then that's your human mind talking to you now and I want to use that to illustrate my point to you. You have hit the nail right on the head there.

You said you were never shown love...ok that may be true but that doesn't mean your soul doesn't have the capacity or potential to love. Sure most things in life are learned through first hand experiance but what you need to realise is that those experiances are merely physical mediums through which we unlock a potential which our soul already posseses.

We as humans live in the world as we know it which is the way our minds perceive it. Our minds eventually take control of us because they think logically and prodominantly on the physical side of things giving full control of our lives to our minds, and this is where self gratification and control come into the picture.

If we have a need, a want, a craving or even a desire immediatley our minds will tell us what and how to satisfy that need, want or what ever. It's a quick-fix and a control issue because anxiety kicks in if we cannot satisfy that need or want, we feel shitty as a result and that negativity clouds our judgement...just think or how the devil uses disguises to fool his victims and you will I'm sure agree with me that negativity distorts the truth, so lesson one is never give in to negativity.

What I origionally asked and the point I was hoping to find some form of agreement on is that if we just learned to trust our instinct/heart or as I would like to call it...LIFE...we would wonder through it and realise things for what they are in essance and our souls would be richer through those experiances...ie.true experiances.

A richer soul = a happy soul = the right direction in life, and now comes the big crunch.....

Life is fair and beautiful, we know this...all Godheads profess this...and if you can say you are truley on the right path you will realise that love is everywhere and it's all around you, as are most things. Our (human) minds automatically associate love with man & woman which basically stems from our minds desire for sex.
What we need to start doing is opening our minds to LIFE because without it we have nothing but what is predetermined and programmed into our minds and that is stagnation not progression...

I know I said the big crunch was earlier in this note but this is actually it....

Learn to live LIFE and LOVE will find you.

I can sympathize with the Libran who posted the recent message about control. To be frank, power, control and love fit quite well with each other. If you have the kind of power that attracts others- and then lose it, well obviously you lose those whom your power attracted. Some people want control over others, and some want to be controlled... so it follows that people who have power should be better versed at controlling those who don't (but want to be controlled, or who want power). Sadly, this plays into relationships more than people like to think, and it also keeps people alone and anxious- because some fear losing control of themselves... and all of us would like to think we have some control over ourslves. Some people even fear being controlled by others, and not all of it is just irrational fears- especially for those of us who spent a long time trying to get out of a relationship in which we felt controlled. Are we entitled to love? Are we entitled to anything? Maybe, but if so, there's a reason that depends more on the individual than simply 'being'. Ask yourself this, "are we entitled to feel pain, loss, anger, greed, jealousy, fear, confusion or any other emotion in the wide spectrum of feelings?" Probably not, unless you buy into the whole reincarnation thing... or karma. I know people who think they're entitled to things... most of them are still waiting for their needs to be met by someone else's actions...

Hmm, yes, this post has raised quite a lot of issues for me (the libran with control issues). Yes, i fear being controlled and i fear losing control. I am such a control freak that i have anxiety attacks when i am out of control. This has led to various phobias which have impaired my life remarkably.

I think its about time i practised losing control. I am going to (try) to put myself in various situations where i feel out of control just to see what happens. Maybe if i do this i will learn to deal or cope with losing control.

I think the reason i fear losing control is that i dont think i will be able to cope. I suppose this all comes down to self doubt and a complete non-faith in my own abilities to cope, in other words, i feel as weak as water and i feel that things will fall apart when i am out of control.

I think i can trace this back to a time in my life when i had to be 'strong', not complain or else heaven forbid, and 'hold up the fort'. You get used to being a certain way and use this to cope.

Of course it doesnt help that i live primarily in my head. I need to let go and 'let god' a little.

The question is, how do i let it all go? I think i will put myself in situations, do what i have to do and when i feel the anxiety, deal with it. What do you think? I need to be brave, do what i want and not worry about the consequences. I think that is my problem, i worry too much. I am constantly afraid of the consequences of my actions.
Ok, time to do it.

Thank you so much guys for your revealing insights. Keep posting if you have to, Im interested in what you have to say.

Seeya,
210.50

Just thinking about love. Its either that i am afraid of falling or that i need to feel so safe before i do. Either way, i dont give myself up too easily. I have venus in virgo, this doesnt help one bit. No wonder i have a restrained love nature. I wish i had have been born a few days earlier or later!

See you guys,
210.

It's not about any of this!!! Ifeel most alive and living life when I am helping others. It's not about what they can do for me or waiting on them to preform an action so I can feel needed. I honestly like to feel as if someone needs me!!! All the other stuff about control and being controlled is irrelevant in what we are discussing, as far as for me personally. If you want to get to the bottom of me, then you will have to go much deeper. There are five things in life that are to strive for, patience, charity, hope, faith and love, but above all of them is love. The kind of love that is eternal and transends us. A higher love. Can you understand me?? I am not entitled to anything that is yours that you don't want to share with me. Love is not charity. You cannot give a little so you make yourself feel better. Like when they pass the collection plate. If I give to you,it is from my heart and I expect nothing in return. But, I would like to have the feeling returned. There are some of us who are capable of a higher love and some of us who cannot. Or they will not let it come out! They don't know how because no one has ever shown them how. Don't let your heart stay cold. I am the fire that can warm it to a glow. Trust, have faith in me and I will not let you down. I will not abandon you. We all pay something in this life, you can either be generous and share or hide it away. If I have extra of everything I need,then I am gonna give what I have to someone with less. Sharing and caring is what it all about. I have an abundance running out of my soul and I need to give it to someone with less. That is all! That is the real deal to heal;can you dig it? Do you want it or not? Someone else may need it or want it.
Susan

Sometimes it is better to just leave your mind alone and just get high! And I don't mean on any substance, but on the only thing that matters, which is loving one another. It's all good!!! That kind of love can transport you to another place! Doesn't matter if you're locked up in a cell somewhere or you're free. To really trust someone to love you to me seems easy, but then again I have never been without it. I have only known the respectful kind of love that makes you grow strong and healthy in mind, body, and soul. I have been fortunate and I also have a little more than I know what to do with, so I need to give it away!

And that is the only thing I am anxious about in my life. Who do I give all the extra to. Who needs it the most. I want to make sure it goes to the right place! And not some one that is gonna waste it over and over and over again. When I do find the right one, it will never run out!

By the way, I loved this whole thread, and I hope the feelings continue. It really is inspiring and very healing for me!!!!!!!! Hands on healing would be even better but I can go with this for now!
Susan~

Susan, thankyou for sharing your comments and above all thankyou for sharing your love.

I agree with a lot of your comments and I too am amazed at how this thread has progressed from when I origionally posted it. At the risk of sounding like a brocken record I want to use it to once again illustrate my origional point, but please keep your comments comming in.

You see, all of you have given something, or added to this thread and in doing so have given it new direction and a fuller meaning as a whole. It's just like a life if you think about it. It has admitedly got no mind of it's own so all it's experiances are given to it from outside influences ie. you and I, the only differance being we as humans have the power to accept or deny those influences placed upon us.

Basically this thread if it were a life would have been molded and influenced by us, the only diffeence between it and us is that it is forced to accept those influences without question because it doesn't know how.
Now think of that in terms of what it is...it is perfect...!!!

I think this ties nicely in with 210.50 and how you say you fear losing control and are always worried about the consequences of your actions. Hmmm...no offence 210 but that's silly because your actions control the consequence you should know that, so from now on may I suggest that your worry more about your actions than their consequences because they are the root of it all.

Thanks guys...you really have made my life richer for all your sharing...

Susan, you say that you are worried about who to give your love to for fear of it being wasted.

Well my suggestion would be once again forget the consequence, stop thinking...oh he/she will just waste it. Think rather about the act of giving that love...your love is never wasted some people just need a bigger dose than others and they will eventually come round and begin to share theirs as well...now wouldn't that be a great feeling, knowing that you have influenced someone to share their love.

No!!!!! Because there are those who can't receive it. Because outside infulences have shaped them to not be able to receive. They are broken vessles who leak. We learn to love by being shown how. Sad to say! A child who is repeadly hurt at the hands of a parent and told that it is because they love them, learns this is what it is! I have spent years trying to pour love into these broken containers. It is never enough, and it is continually wasted and thrown away! It depleats my own supply. Some think that showing to much love or feeling or kindeness as a weakness and that is their loss. I can't swim holding on to someone who can't. Let God pick up the slack. I tried so therefore there is NO failure.

You ought to just let people be and except them how they are. If you can't, then go on down your road in peace.

My advice about all this! Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication.

Whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy--meditate on these things.

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. AMEN!!

Woah, ok, i didnt mean to turn this whole thread into 'control'! You must be lucky 64, unlike you, i feel that if i 'let go', then my world will fall apart. Refer to my last post. I realise unconditional love has to come from within. Maybe i am being conditional by needing to feel safe before i give it. Interesting thought...

204, you are right. I should think about my actions instead of the consequences. From now on thats what i am going to do. Thanks for making me face myself 204 and thanks for making me face myself, both of you.

Bye bye,
210

"Maybe i am being conditional by needing to feel safe before i give it. Interesting thought"

You should at least try! No failure when you try!

Susan

PS 210.50? I am very fortunate and I give thanks everyday!

Hmmm, 205 you have much love to give and just as much will to give it, this I can sense, but I fear you are not takeing pride in your ability just because you feel it is at times and in your opinion wasted because certain individuals wont recieve it.

What happened to the faith and hope that was discussed above...Never-Never-Never believe your efforts are in vein because you deem someone doesn't appreciate your goodwill. You are not them and unless you can read their minds how can you ever really tell.

We all agree that we are all capable of love...even an axe murderer (sorry to pain such a grim picture but I'm using it to illustrate my point) and we all agree that we need to share and learn from others to gain that knowledge of love or whatever it may be that you have to share.

In my opinion it just makes more sense to give that love to those who are battling to appreciate it...they're the ones that NEED it. The people you are dispersing your goodwill and kind nature to who in your opinion appreciate it are obviously capable of love...their lesson is learnt...they need no help, it's the others...those leaking vessles you talked of...it's them, they're the ones who need to be nurtured and shown the light.

Think of it this way...you don't go to school to recieve brushing up or appreciation skills...you go to school to be made aware of what you do not know or cannot comprehend.

You are a fine human being 205 this much I am willing to gamble on but I think you might need a little more confidence in yourself, to keep trying. Never think your goodwill can never do good, that is like saying the rain won't make you wet. I fear you are expecting to many results too quickly.

If you have shared your love with someone when they were 10yrs old but thought you had made no impact that person, does the fact that he only realised it 50yrs down the line when you were dead mean it never worked...NO not at all...

Keep your chin up 204...the right things in life sometimes hurt the most.

I'm listening to you. I remain flexible but not naive! Ok

Love
Susan

Susan, your last post has indeed made me think. It took me a while to to make any sense of it but these are merely my thought in reply...I hope it helps you out.

You are not being conditional, to me you need to learn a little more about it, build some confidence and try agin. You worry that you might not have any effect...Don't, as I said before good can only do good.

You also have this recurring saying that you hate and fear loseing control, you feel like you will lose everything but is that so bad...—

Sometimes the best way to realise exactly what you have is to lose it all, and besides when you're down there's only one way from there and that's up...

I don't proclaim to be any authority on anything but my guess would be that you are inches away from realising something significant Susan.

Hold on...keep your head up and try not to worry too much before you try something just because you are afraid of the outcome...go fot it...make it happen...if your intensions are good, no bad can come of it...that much I promise you...

That's right. That would be known as FREEDOM!!! Yes, to lose it all would be to free yourself. Well, that will happen one day and for all of us whether we let go of it or it is taken from us. I guess, what I am thinking of is something different. I am here and my life belongs to the Lord and he gets to say what happens to me. I have been at the bottom and went up, still doing it. I have to go, but I'll get back to you.

I did give it all up and it is an amazing feeling to know the truth; it has set me free. So, like you told me...'what will be will be'. I have trust in he who died for me. Too deep for ya—?

Aha...I agree with you to an extent...all I'd like to add to that is you are on the right path by giving your life to God...but...

We are all God, we are all part part of him and although I am not a christian I agree with the bible (as I do with many other religious scripts) that that we are all created in God's image. God gave us the gift of choice. We are all capable of anything if we chose to believe in it and to accept it for what it is and capable of, and the more we learn and accept the higher up the ranks we will climb to our reunion with God.

What I'm trying to say is that I fear you see God as being differant to you. I believe we are the same...part of God, and always have been. We are in a way what makes him so great because without us what has he done that is so great...we are his deciples, his children we are just as important to the equation of life as he is except we are on a quest to be as perfect as he IS...that is his gift to us which we excercise through our right of choice.

Think of it like this....

Image God being the heart in the body of Life. We are born as new souls and become the blood cells in that body of Life, plentiful but all as important as every one else. We are all important to the preservation of that body, we all have our role.
Once we become wiser and more evolved in Life we are promoted to new roles in the preservation of that body. We may progress to be part of the veins...now we are responsible for keeping those young cells on route through the body, yet still through living more life we grow wiser and we climb the ladder even further in life's progression untill finally we become part of that heart...the central control point, the HQ.

That's where we should all be striving to be because that's where that transcendental love eminates from and where we will life for eternity in peace and love for all of man kind and the universe.

Wow...now even I am surprised at how easy it is when you think about it. Thanks guys, thank you for sharing you thoughts I am ever greatful.

Hey,

Stay on that cloud today and for as long as you can! Your insight is incredible and it is pouring out like like a beautiful warm breeze. Keep floating, baby!
Susan

Haha...susan you ought to know better.

Flattery will get you...Ummm lets see...EVERYWHERE with a Pisces...hahaha!

Just joking...need a little fun to rest the grey matter and go back to reflect on it all hey.
I am glad to have helped and to be honest I have helped myself a great deal as well but would have never come to any of these conclusions without your help and honesty in your replies and questions.

Keep thinking...keep asking...and I'll keep trying to help, because believe me this thread has done wonders for me as well.

Ever in debt to your gracious heart and inquiring mind...
Durrie.

Need to go now...c ya 2morrow.

Now who is flattering who here— I think I found a friend! And I couldn't be any happie, for real!!!!! C U when I C U!

PS Yes, it seems like I hit it off pretty good with these Pisces, hahaha!

Enjoy the gray matter
Susan

Hi! This is the most interesting and inspiring thread I have ever read! It has given me a lot to think about....

I love to read your posts, Susan!

Hey, Durrie, I responded to this question on the Aquarian board..but it didn't take the near the fascinating journey that this thread took!

Both of you: Keep inspiring me! I love it!
Star

Yes, 24x7
Good looking Cancer and Scorpio women, This Pisces man is waitning to see you to form the ultimate love relationship. I know one day we will meet and that day will be the most beautiful day of our Lives!!!


Peace "C"