New Here asking for Advice on Pisces Women

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deezie
@deezie
19 Years1,000+ PostsPisces

Comments: 73 · Posts: 3385 · Topics: 36
From your other post freddy... it sounds as if she's being smothered and therefore losing interest.

She told you that she wasn't ready for a relationship. You've deemed yourself in a relationship, where she has deemed that you are dating for the past 8 months. You are at a level of commitment that she outright told you she wasn't ready for in the beginning. So you signed up with the guise of "ok I will be patient" - but now you are becoming impatient and wanting more than she already told you she could offer.

Give her some space. Some room to breathe a little more.



You can't hold a fish with any comfort. You just have to enjoy it when it decides to be near. hahah said that way - why would anyone want to be involved with us, I wonder... but I think you know the answer to it based on the fact that the time you spend with her you enjoy. Right?
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deezie
@deezie
19 Years1,000+ PostsPisces

Comments: 73 · Posts: 3385 · Topics: 36
Ok, but I'm saying the damage of smothering her has been done.
So now the road is longer. Which means more waiting. More patience. More maintenance of the not smothering.

Do you see that you are trying to decide for her, that "you have been patient enough" and now she must bend to your will? That type of thinking won't fly with a pisces. Waiting is the only thing, and you have to decide if it is worth doing or not. There is no other action at this point that will erase the past and just make her magically come back to you.

It's wait-and-see time.

You can't talk on the phone every day, and go to the gym 5 days a week, and think that isn't smothering.... I don't know if that was meant in past tense.... but if it is currently going on, it is still smothering.

The harder you hang on, the more wiggling and thrashing we will do to get away.
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deezie
@deezie
19 Years1,000+ PostsPisces

Comments: 73 · Posts: 3385 · Topics: 36
For those that want the other part of his post in his other thread that wasn't answered quick enough for him:

Posted by freddy42
I am am a 42year old Scorpio Man dating a 44year old pisces woman. We have been dating for about 8 months now. At first when we met she told me she had been in a 2 year relationship with a guy and had broken off. The guy ended up marrying someone else 3 months later after they broke off. She did tell me in the beginning of the relationship she was not ready for a relationship. She said lets date and see what happens. Well at first everything was great. We kissed passionately. We made love passionately. She got to know my family and loved them. Then these last several months she has changed. She stopped kissing me. We hardly make love anymore. Before she would call me every morning and for several months now she doesn't do that anymore. For her birthday and valentine's day I took half of my day off to go in person at her work and dropped of dozen roses, teddy bears, bracelet, chocolates, and other goodies for her. I always open the car door for her. I buy her a rose just about everyweek and tell her how much I love her. She has yet to tell me that she loves me. She keeps telling me to give her time. She tells me that she is not ready. I tell her i understand but why did she stop kissing me and why is it that she hardly ever wants to make love anymore. We talk on the phone everyday and work out at the gym together 5 days a week. We go to the park and go feed turtles and ducks and some stray cats that are there. I have tried to read on pisces women likes and dislikes and I thought pisces women fell in love fast. She has not. I don't want to lose her. I am so in love with her...Please help!! Need Advice...




I very much feel for your heart pain freddy.... but you are going to need to be straight up with us about the questions that Poisson pointed out. Becaucse right now it seems like a half story.... even if she felt smothered.... I feel like there must have been some sort of event that happened to spark this. Was it around the three month mark? When she found out her ex got married? What are you blinding yourself to that you don't want to acknowledge—?
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freddy42
@freddy42
12 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 52 · Topics: 9
Posted by Poisson
Ah. Thank you Deezie...


"At first when we met she told me she had been in a 2 year relationship with a guy and had broken off. The guy ended up marrying someone else 3 months later after they broke off. She did tell me in the beginning of the relationship she was not ready for a relationship."

That's hard to get over. That's a blow to the heart and self-esteem... She's trying hard for your relationship to work because from the sound of it, you're a great guy. I don't think she's consciously trying to hurt you, but I think she might be assessing your relationship, and maybe herself, by distancing a bit. It's a selfish thing to do. But she did tell you she wasn't ready...

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freddy42
@freddy42
12 Years

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Well when we met I met her at the gym. I am not sure how long of a time she had broken off with the guy she was in a 2 year relationship with. All I know is she told me she loved him very much but he was a total asshole with her. She told me they were always fighting. Things were great for both of us in the beginning. I would go to the gym and I had a workout partner named Joel and we would work out together. She would see me there and she would hug me but we never worked out together. After the gym I would go with my friend to walk at the park and by the time I would talk to her would be around 9:00p.m..Well she started to ask me to work out with her instead of my friend. At first I said no. I told her I was already used to working out with my friend. But kept insisting for me to work out with her. It was like this for about 2 months until I finally gave in and started to work out with her. So my question is if I am smothering her because we see each other at the gym 5 times a week who's fault is it? I told her from the get go I didn't want to but did it for her. Now this is not a long distance relationship as we live close by. I am willing to wait and give her time but just don't know how to if we are going to the gym and park together. Am I supposed to tell her I don't want to go with her to park anymore or work out with her anymore? I am so confused. Why has she stopped kissing me? I know she gets jealous and feels something for me because when we are talking on the phone and I get a text from a friend her first response is, "who's texting you".
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freddy42
@freddy42
12 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 52 · Topics: 9
All I know is that the guys that she has dated in the past have been all jerks with her. She told me this herself. I am not sure of the time frame when she and her x broke up. All I know is when I started to talk to her she told me that her x had married someone within 3 months after breaking up. Now I don't know if that was a month or two before I met her or even longer. She told me when we met that I was different from any guy she had dated. She told me she liked the fact that I would tell her how I felt and wouldn't hold back my feelings. I have tried to figure out what I did wrong and one time she told me is was not me but her. She told me she got scared of how good things were going and she just closed up...thanks deezie and poisson for your comments and I hope you keep on replying
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deezie
@deezie
19 Years1,000+ PostsPisces

Comments: 73 · Posts: 3385 · Topics: 36
Ok - so you aren't smothering her necessarily by being at the gym together. My assumption is that was your doing. This is why details are important!

Also... you are fine.... just be patient with her. She sounds like she is sorting herself out. Perhaps she needed to put the brakes on to be able to do that, because she was all "head first" at the beginning. I wouldn't tell her that you want to change anything if she is already a willing participant in it. Just enjoy spending your time with her.

Have you guys discussed this openly? I agree with Poisson... I don't think this is something she's doing to hurt you and get away.
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deezie
@deezie
19 Years1,000+ PostsPisces

Comments: 73 · Posts: 3385 · Topics: 36
Posted by freddy42
She told me she got scared of how good things were going and she just closed up...



This will happen... and I think what I said in my above post applies. She dove in head first, and then remembered about the possibility of hurt. So just keep being stable, strong, consistent you.... continue proving you are not like the others, and give her time to come back around.

I truly think as long as you don't do anything drastic, or do your own scorpio self-sabotage..... you will be fine 🙂
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freddy42
@freddy42
12 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 52 · Topics: 9
Well thanks alot for both of your comments. I feel better now that both of you have given your opinion of the situation. I am not a quitter when it comes to love. When I love I love with everything I have and don't hold back. Just a example of what happened today. Normally we both work 8-5 jobs. She usually calls me as soon as she gets out of work. It takes me about 20 minutes to get home. Well around 16 minutes after I left work she still hadn't called. Then I got home and looked at my phone and saw a missed call from her but I decided not to call her and give her space. Well within a few minutes the phone rang again and it was her. When I answered she asked me why I didn't answer her first call. I told her I didn't hear my phone ring. So that is just an example where I am giving her space but then she is the one questioning me why I don't answer her. This has happened several times in the past. I just finished working out and we both worked out together. I came to library to use computer and she asked me where I was going and told her I was going to library. She wanted me to stay and do cardio with her but I felt I needed to leave her alone. One thing I have read on Pisces is that they are flirtacious. I have noticed that about her but she denies being like this. Well I no longer question her on this but would before. I've read that pisces are very faithful. Is this true? or should I be worried. Sometimes I feel like she is waiting to find someone else. Like at the gym I feel she stares too much at certain guys and the scorpio in me gets jealous and several months back I would confront her on this but she would deny she was doing this. I have tried to read as much on pisces as possible to help me with her but not sure what is myth and what is the truth. Need some help telling this apart. I know she loves animals and that is why we go to the park. She has a small dog and the dog is pretty mean and hardly lets anyone pet him but he took to me instantly. The other day at the park there was this guy with a Boxer dog and she went up to the guy and asked him questions about the guy. Well this guy was fairly good looking and tall and I got jealous but did not show it to her. My fear or insecurity is that one day if I don't go to park with her that she will see him and then they will start talking and then who knows what can happen from there. Am I crazy for feeling this way?
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freddy42
@freddy42
12 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 52 · Topics: 9
Posted by freddy42
Well thanks alot for both of your comments. I feel better now that both of you have given your opinion of the situation. I am not a quitter when it comes to love. When I love I love with everything I have and don't hold back. Just a example of what happened today. Normally we both work 8-5 jobs. She usually calls me as soon as she gets out of work. It takes me about 20 minutes to get home. Well around 16 minutes after I left work she still hadn't called. Then I got home and looked at my phone and saw a missed call from her but I decided not to call her and give her space. Well within a few minutes the phone rang again and it was her. When I answered she asked me why I didn't answer her first call. I told her I didn't hear my phone ring. So that is just an example where I am giving her space but then she is the one questioning me why I don't answer her. This has happened several times in the past. I just finished working out and we both worked out together. I came to library to use computer and she asked me where I was going and told her I was going to library. She wanted me to stay and do cardio with her but I felt I needed to leave her alone. One thing I have read on Pisces is that they are flirtacious. I have noticed that about her but she denies being like this. Well I no longer question her on this but would before. I've read that pisces are very faithful. Is this true? or should I be worried. Sometimes I feel like she is waiting to find someone else. Like at the gym I feel she stares too much at certain guys and the scorpio in me gets jealous and several months back I would confront her on this but she would deny she was doing this. I have tried to read as much on pisces as possible to help me with her but not sure what is myth and what is the truth. Need some help telling this apart. I know she loves animals and that is why we go to the park. She has a small dog and the dog is pretty mean and hardly lets anyone pet him but he took to me instantly. The other day at the park there was this guy with a Boxer dog and she went up to the guy and asked him questions about the guy. Well this guy was fairly good looking and tall and I got jealous but did not show it to her. My fear or insecurity is that one day if I don't go to park with her that she will see him and then they will start talking and then who knows what can happen from there. Am I crazy for feeling this way?
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freddy42
@freddy42
12 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 52 · Topics: 9
So I go to the park and she calls me but I missed her call because we listening to the radio. I texted her I was at park and then she texted back okay. She shows up to park and first thing she asks me is why I didn't wait for her.
My response was I told you I would meet you there. Anyways we fed the ducks and turtles and then we were going to feed some stray cats along a fence. While we were walking she sees the guy with the Boxer dog at a distance and I could tell she was looking at him. she goes and feeds the cats but then she said lets go. The guy was walking in front of us with his dog and I felt like she just wanted to catch up to him to talk to him. That was my gut feeling. Like I said in previous comment the guy is tall and in good shape. Makes me think that maybe that is her type of guy not me. Good thing is I didn't say anything to her about this but why is it I feel insecure. I feel as though she has some interest in this guy. Why does she stare at him? does she not know I am looking at her? What do you guys think? Am I paranoid? I just don't want to lose her and I would hate it if she began talking to this guy and then would develop something with him. Please let me know what your honest opinion is on this...Should I tell her how this makes me feel? in the past when I would tell her she was staring at a guy she would tell me your crazy, your stupid. Of course that would hurt my feelings. I dont want to confront her if I don't have to but this is really bugging me...
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Daydreamer35
@Daydreamer35
14 YearsPisces

Comments: 0 · Posts: 77 · Topics: 1
My advice from an astrologer's standpoint is to stop reading about Pisces women in general and read about her. Study her chart. No two people are the same, regardless of their sun sign. There is a lot more to her astrological make up than her being a Pisces sun. For example, I'm a Pisces, but Capricorn dominates my chart. If you really want to learn more about her I recommend astro.com.

Once you create her chart go to Interactive Horoscopes and go to Portrait, to learn about her personality in general, or Love, to learn about her behavior in relationships as well as what she is looking for/needs. If you do not know her EXACT time of birth or an extremely close estimation, use a random time (preference is noon), and just avoid reading anything regarding placements to the ascendant (asc) or mid-haven (mc)as the exact time of birth is needed for these calculations to be correct. Also, the first line of each description of the individual planets reads: for example, Moon in the 12th House. Do not read these descriptions unless you use her exact time of birth as they won't be accurate.

I wish you the best, and I hope everything works out for the two of you. You obviously care about her to put this much time/effort into trying to make things work and learn about her. She is very lucky, even if she doesn't see it.
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deezie
@deezie
19 Years1,000+ PostsPisces

Comments: 73 · Posts: 3385 · Topics: 36
Posted by EusiveSoulll


I do not like the fact that she referred to the OP as stupid regardless of the reasons. That is just plain down disrespectful . I do however sense some control issues (even if miniscule) on both, OP's, as well as her behalf. OP's due to jealousy and hers due to mirroring. Once again, only speculation based on what I have read thus far.



I could see myself saying such a thing to someone - when I think it's obviously not the case. Meant playfully - not as a direct insult to someone's intelligence, but just that I thought the concern had no validity. And I also know how this hurts a Scorpio's feelings. I think it's a bit of a disconnect in interpretation vs intent.
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freddy42
@freddy42
12 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 52 · Topics: 9
Thanks for everyone's response to me. Well I have talked to her directly and told her how I feel. She tells me to give her time to see if we get close but I told her how can we get close if she keeps closing up. Her response is give it time. So how do I become a challenge to her. I don't want to be like all those jerks she has had before. I am very loving and that is the only way I know how to be. As far as being predictable what can I do to not being predicatable? I am so confused. Last night she called me twice and like I said before I have been giving her space but it is her that calls me and when I don't answer her calls she asks me right away why I didn't answer or she tells me you forgot about me. I am so in love with this woman and just thinking of losing her breaks my heart. Please give me some advice on how to b a challenge and what I can do to get us both in the right direction. Deezie she keeps telling me we are dating and getting to know one another. So I guess that is where we are at.
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Undine
@Undine
12 Years5,000+ Posts

Comments: 1552 · Posts: 8895 · Topics: 11
Is she a February Pisces? Her behaviour is clear to me and also consistent with your gut feelings (so please don't call me mean).

—She stopped kissing me. We hardly make love anymore.??

The novelty and excitement are gone. She still enjoys your company, however this cannot compensate for the lack of chemistry. You are not her type and she is not sexually attracted to you. There is nothing you could do about it.

—I thought pisces women fell in love fast. She has not.Sometimes I feel like she is waiting to find someone else.??

If she is not in love with you by now, most likely she never will. She is looking for someone else, while keeping you close for emotional comfort.
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freddy42
@freddy42
12 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 52 · Topics: 9
Posted by freddy42
Thanks for everyone's response to me. Well I have talked to her directly and told her how I feel. She tells me to give her time to see if we get close but I told her how can we get close if she keeps closing up. Her response is give it time. So how do I become a challenge to her. I don't want to be like all those jerks she has had before. I am very loving and that is the only way I know how to be. As far as being predictable what can I do to not being predicatable? I am so confused. Last night she called me twice and like I said before I have been giving her space but it is her that calls me and when I don't answer her calls she asks me right away why I didn't answer or she tells me you forgot about me. I am so in love with this woman and just thinking of losing her breaks my heart. Please give me some advice on how to b a challenge and what I can do to get us both in the right direction. Deezie she keeps telling me we are dating and getting to know one another. So I guess that is where we are at.

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Undine
@Undine
12 Years5,000+ Posts

Comments: 1552 · Posts: 8895 · Topics: 11
Now you made me feel guilty for being harsh.

Here are some astrological aspects your Pisces has and they may be relevant to your question ("you" refers to her):

Venus in Aries: you are easily excited by the prospect of new love. You'll pursue a love interest with shocking abandon, and in extreme cases, this zeal leads you into fly-by-night marriages. Your impulsiveness gets you in trouble sometimes, because you lose interest just as quickly. You don't like anything too settled, preferring some tension in the relationship. This is maddening for "let's all get along" types. But for you, friction gets the blood pumping, including mental sparring. You'll flee from a passive partner, or a bond that falls into routine. Bottom line is that you need challenge, and constant creativity.

Venus conjunct Saturn: In this lifetime the arena of human relationships and personal love will be full of challenge and lessons for you. Love is hard to find, hard to sustain, or just plain hard! Shyness and loneliness, due mostly to an acute sensitivity to the possibility of rejection, are apt to plague your younger years. Even when friendship and open affection is offered to you, you are prone to doubt it, push it away in disbelief, or feel unworthy of it. Pure, unadulterated pleasure in any form discomforts you. Subconsciously at least, you believe that there is a price to be paid for any love or pleasure you receive, that you may be punished if you enjoy too much or love too much. There is an inner link between love and loss, love and separation, or love and punishment that inhibits you or makes you wary. Worst of all, you may feel that you are unlovable or unwanted. All of this is a karmic carry-over which needs to be handled with great compassion toward yourself. You may have toughened up and hardened your heart a great deal due to past injury, so that you have acted in cold, unfeeling, ungenerous, or unloving ways towards others and yourself.
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Undine
@Undine
12 Years5,000+ Posts

Comments: 1552 · Posts: 8895 · Topics: 11
Bloody hell! You are a Scorpio, it should come natural to you! You certainly do not need lesson from a Pisces.

Play with words, tease, make her feel insecure, be sarcastic, mysterious, ignore her, compete with her, make her jealous, challenge her, go on a holiday without her, do something you haven't done before, confess her your "darker" site, make fun of your male competition...all these together.
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deezie
@deezie
19 Years1,000+ PostsPisces

Comments: 73 · Posts: 3385 · Topics: 36
Posted by Undine


Venus in Aries: you are easily excited by the prospect of new love. You'll pursue a love interest with shocking abandon, and in extreme cases, this zeal leads you into fly-by-night marriages. Your impulsiveness gets you in trouble sometimes, because you lose interest just as quickly. You don't like anything too settled, preferring some tension in the relationship. This is maddening for "let's all get along" types. But for you, friction gets the blood pumping, including mental sparring. You'll flee from a passive partner, or a bond that falls into routine. Bottom line is that you need challenge, and constant creativity.

Venus conjunct Saturn: In this lifetime the arena of human relationships and personal love will be full of challenge and lessons for you. Love is hard to find, hard to sustain, or just plain hard! Shyness and loneliness, due mostly to an acute sensitivity to the possibility of rejection, are apt to plague your younger years. Even when friendship and open affection is offered to you, you are prone to doubt it, push it away in disbelief, or feel unworthy of it. Pure, unadulterated pleasure in any form discomforts you. Subconsciously at least, you believe that there is a price to be paid for any love or pleasure you receive, that you may be punished if you enjoy too much or love too much. There is an inner link between love and loss, love and separation, or love and punishment that inhibits you or makes you wary. Worst of all, you may feel that you are unlovable or unwanted. All of this is a karmic carry-over which needs to be handled with great compassion toward yourself. You may have toughened up and hardened your heart a great deal due to past injury, so that you have acted in cold, unfeeling, ungenerous, or unloving ways towards others and yourself.



hold on, hold on.... those are the placements I got for her....
It's Mars in Aries, with a conjunction (loosely) to Saturn
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Undine
@Undine
12 Years5,000+ Posts

Comments: 1552 · Posts: 8895 · Topics: 11
Posted by deezie
That's the info he gave to me. By the math of 44 years old... you would be correct....

Not sure where it's wrong. @freddy... is she really 45? or really born in '68?




If you are right, she would have the same placements as the guy that Lotus has been moaning about over the past 2 years or so!

Oh dear! Freddie, in this case even more "torture" would be needed! And a very expensive suit!
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freddy42
@freddy42
12 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 52 · Topics: 9
I know I am a scorpion but when I love someone I don't want to hurt them. Especially since she told me all the guys she has had were all jerks. I have asked her before if maybe that is what she wants; a guy to treat her bad and be a bad boy and her response is no. Don't know if she is telling the truth but I don't want to be like the rest of the guys. If she is going to feel something for me it has to be for who I am. I know I have that other side of me the dark side which I have not shown to her. And yes lots of girls have told me girls like the challenge in a relationship...So I am at a crossroads to what to do...
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freddy42
@freddy42
12 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 52 · Topics: 9
Well lately I have tried giving her space. I have not been calling her or texting her and she is the one who has been calling me and texting me and then asking me why I am not texting her or calling her and then I just make something up when she asks. As far as what I want from the girl I am dating is simple> for her to love me. I hear that once a pisces loves you she loves you with everything she has and it will be very hard for her to let you go. That is what I want...I was married once for 16 years and my wife cheated on me. I know of pain. I thought I would never love someone again until she came along. I stayed single for almost 5 years. I started to date almost a year and a half ago. All the women I met I could not develop feelings for them. They actually developed feelings for me but I never loved any of them. Then this woman comes into my life and boom I'm done. I would marry her right now if she wanted too...
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freddy42
@freddy42
12 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 52 · Topics: 9
Thanks Poisson..Well I think she is worth it if not I would have given up a long time ago. I have faith in her that she will change. I know I need to stop being insecure and stop being jealous but that is the scorpion in me...I love this woman so much and if she could just love me half of what I love her then this would be a awesome relationship. And I am going to continue to be myself. One lady gave me advice one time...she said "shower her with love and eventually she will have no choice but to love you back". That's what I am trying to do. I am different from those other guys and if she wants someone who is a bad boy and treats her bad then she will be lonely all her life. There are plenty of guys like that in the world but not many men like me that value and respect and love with everything they have...
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freddy42
@freddy42
12 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 52 · Topics: 9
Posted by Undine
Posted by sdfgwer
OP: it is in your best interest to move on. You lied to her. (We know the truth.) Are you sure your ex cheated on you and not the other way around? Liars will always be liars. Adios.



Is this true, Freddy?
click to expand


guys what is going on here. Y am I being called a liar. I opened up that I know what it feels to be hurt cause I was cheated on. I told my girl this. So what is going on? Y am I being labled a liar?
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