Do Long Distance

Unhide it!!!

In January, I will begin my first ever LDR. he is will only be 3 hours away, but I'm nervous. any tips?

TALK TALK TALK TALK TALK.

I survived one and i believe it's because we took the time needed to feed each others needs. We were 4 1/2 hours so not too much more then you are. We talked on the phone time most of the evenings, we texted alllll day. we played games online at night. we were always communicating some way or some how. We only got to see each other usually once or twice a month so that is VERY difficult.
i have done a few long distance relationships and this one is the only one that has worked out. he moved here 🙂 but that was after almost 2 years. and it was 2 years of torture.

WELL worth it. i'm all about letting people live their lives and figure things out for themselves. We change and evolve with time. And the distance will make or break you. We are human and go through expereinces and i beleive in living life every day. So i have way more understanding then most. The bumps only make us stronger if you can communicate and work throught hem.

And i called him my investment haha cuz i knew he was a good man and worth him trying to figure things out.

LDR is hard, the first time I had one, I didn't survive, probably because we were both very young and I constantly needed his attention, but now that I have a second LDR, I learn from the first, just keep busy with your life and communicate when you can 🙂

thanks chocolate,

I agree that the bumps do make us stronger and we do learn from it. It is afterall the journey that brings us closer, not the goal 🙂

What was the Thread about again ??

chocolate comes in creamy. dark. milk, and other forms 😉

Chocolate is also an "Aphrodisiac"

choco latte` 🙂 We are so on the same page. Not to mention i want him to figure things out and makes his decisions and go through his mistakes to really truly see for himself how he feels. All the trials and tribulations we went through helped us learn and see that we do love each other, can't live without each other and the long distance helped us see that. You have no choice but to either figure that out or the down side, see that we can live without each other.
this was hard for me to learn as a gemini, yes we do manipulate and sometimes deceive to get what we want. And for me to go full force with someone and NOT use anything to try and conive him was a monumental feat for me. He meant that much to me and i know i did everything in my power to allow him his choices and HIS decisions. I couldn't beleive how much that did FOR ME. 😉

"Anywho, I really think not only talking and commitment would help, but it would also really help if you guys have a strong foundation to begin with. Example. I was with a guy for 5 years. We did a long distance when we were going on our 3rd year and it was an interval of one year we spent apart. We were totally fine. Peachy keen and dandy. We spent A LOT of time talking over the phone, he drove up to see me every once in a while (it was a three hour difference). Now my other BF of less than one year we were trying the whole long distance thing, except we were 3,000 miles apart. It would have worked out better if we were 3 hours apart but it didn't work out so well. He also did not seem as committed as the previous bf because he was always busy with school work and his frat, but we're still friends"

Ardent - i actually think the LDR can help with this. You are forced to rely only on your friendship to get through the LDR. This will make or break your friendship as well. You either can endure and grow a friendship or start to lead 2 spearate lives as friends as well. Very challenging to balance growth and separation.

"It's being in arms length, I couldn't do without her physical presence. I'm good at speaking but certainly not the best at it. I speak mostly through my actions. I need the physical attention from my partner. I certainly couldn't do without it."

Ray's - This was our biggest obstacle. We creave, desire, needed, wanted, relied on each other especailly in thephysical sense. And once a month was NO WHERE near enough. And him being a bull and his need for touch and feel is why i guess you can say let him see someone else but knowing she was temporary was very difficult for me to go through. ANd i knew in time someone would have to make a choice on who moved and so forth.

He ended up doing the moving cuz he knew we couldn't continue down that path any longer. Took him 2 years to figure that out. I would have moved. but i needed and i think he needed to make that choice and decision - for full committment.

I lucked out and was more than worth it to him to make those life changing choices.

"that's why i picked the name chocolate.....so many ways to use it and enjoy it...the warmer it is the better...bubbles will appear"

Choco latte' - lmao that makes me want to have a taste hahahaha

hahahaha you crack me up 🙂

I am a professional with the LDR thing. I travel 78% for work, and well my history is, with it being so hard forme to find someone to settle with, i have always been the playa playa kinda chick. NOthing serious, very light and cuz i traveled so much and know people everywhere, well.. hell i got teased for having a man at every port. But i live for the moment and that's been my life. until the bull lol. So changed my life it's crazy.

Now i'm trying to keep my butt home!! what a change. and it's so welcomed.

I have no doubt, you would be what me and my baby call a "snack" lmao :-p

LDRs are hard but not impossible. I know someone who's been hurt so much by her bf and they are still together-it's been a 2.5 year LDR. I don't know what she's thinking, I guess it's "love" *shrugs*...she's kept him despite the fact that he's such a jackass, that's what bothers me, we don't talk about him no more b/c then we get into a fight.

choco: yup, that's exactly why we don't talk about him. We both know how we feel about the situation. Keep in mind, it is her first relationship, maybe that's why. I don't know why she's doing this, he's cheated on her TWICE in a period of 3 weeks with TWO different women, helllooo—? I think he's a complete jackass, I jsut hope my friend will open her eyes up someday when it's not too late.

She doesn't listen to her mom, why would she listen to me? Our friendship has been great. Yes, there've been ups and downs, but it's like that in any friendship. And, my friendship is an LDR, haven't met her in the 2 years that I've known her. But now it doesn't matter, our bond is so strong, we fight and we patch up🙂 LDRs are hard, I'll be very honest, whether it be romance or friendship (obviously easier if it's the latter). But LDRs are not impossible. I've learnt a LOT in teh past two/three years of having engaged in LDRs in general. It's great, you've to have an open mind though and be ready for a lot of "Drama" sometimes. But then again, where there's ppl involved (on or off the net), there's bound to be drama.....just check out DXP for all the drama that goes on here on a regular basis, LOL-just an e.g.

lol, don't be judging now🙂 It's all about perspective anyways, you may find it not all that good and figure that I have issues or whatever, lol. That's fine too. I know where I stand and I'm good with it. And no, I don't have that many "outside" people involved in life. Just the few precious ones. And no, the drama is just regular drama that you get to see in everyday life anyways.

I'm a psycho bitch on the net that out there to get ya, happy?😛🙂

choco latte' - ya i'm truely happy. 🙂 and umm i got about 2 dollars... what can i get—? lmao

LMAO you're a nut!!

No that's the cookies i baked this weekend, i kid you not. and they were mmmm mmmm good. lol

Girl i got any kinda sweet or will bake you any you want sista!!!LMAO don't be teasin me... :-p