Sex Hiatus

What's the longest you've ever gone without sex? (whether IN a relationship or single)
What were your reasons for going so long without it?

And if you didn't have actual sex, did you atleast do other sexual things with others?

I agree that sex can be over-rated sometimes, especially if had with the WRONG person at the WRONG time for all the WRONG reasons, BUT I find it interesting that there are PLENTY of people out here who don't place a high priority/importance on sex OR ANY sexual activity, whether it's given OR received!

A friend of mine went 7 years w/o doing ANYTHING sexual with anyone! She vowed to herself not to be sexually active with anyone UNTIL (and not a second before) she was engaged to be married. BUT, she didn't plan this "hiatus" b/c she believes in marriage before sex. No, it was moreso that she was tired of regretting that she'd given her body to some men, especially after the breakup of a relationship OR just simply feeling "used" with a F buddy. Sex isn't all that, BUT it IS great! I can't see going w/o it for 7 years, BUT hey, to each it's own

It's been two months, by choice, but its killing me! lol. I decided to try out celabacy, and even though im VERY sexually frustrated, it has actually made me realise that not eveyrthing comes down to sex. I am a bit of a nymphomaniac (not as in likes sex a lot but as in borderline addicted), so I feel it has been beneficial. Although I do not feel sex is over-rated I do feel it was consuming far to much of my time, that I should have been putting into more productive things.

Im not going to go as far as not having sex till im in love/married, but I am only giving up my celabacy for someone I am seriously "in like" with. I've got my eye on the (lucky) guy who im planning on breaking my celabacy with, but he needs to sort himself out and decide what he wants quick! But i suppose I can always have sex with the person I love the most (myself) anytime I want lol

Wow... it's been six months. This is by far the longest since I became sexually active. I got divorced and haven't entertained any new women yet. The part I don't understand is how you can say sex is over rated though... bite your tongue!

Posted by LibraSid
The part I don't understand is how you can say sex is over rated though... bite your tongue!

Well sex itself is NOT what I consider over-rated. It's the THINGS PEOPLE WILL DO & the consequences people are ignorantly willing to suffer from that lead me to believe that sex is sometimes over-rated.

1. People bring unwanted children into this world & why? All b/c that 20 minutes of sex with someone they barely knew/cared about was just THAT important. I think it's quite silly to bring an 18+ year commitment into the world all b/c of a 20-60 minute "fling"
2. People are willing to die or get stds (some permanent) all so they can experience a sexual episode with someone; & on top of that, half of those "escapades" weren't even worth it OR good when that person looks back. Sex is great, BUT it's NOT worth dying or being terminally ill for! My goodness!
3. People allow their desire for sex to ruin their relationships & their OWN self-esteem. Like I said, sex is great & all, BUT it's NOT worth losing a loved one over (cheating, for example). SHeeeeeeesh!

I haven't had sex in a a little over two months as well. Doing temporary celibacy, I suppose you can say by choice, but honestly not really. I just haven't found anyone I would like to do anything with, yet. Some days I'm perfectly fine, and other days I'm raging and craving. I don't feel sex is overrated, but like Krysrenee said, with the wrong people, it can be terrible.

I can't do casual sex; so I'd rather wait until I once again am with someone I really enjoy and I feel I can trust. I also wouldn't go as far as waiting until marriage (I'm not even sure if I want to get married), but I respect people who make that decision. It's very tough and takes a lot of concentration.

@Candeh: I agree. Some people get complete & utter satisfaction out of sleeping with people they have no intimate or emotional bond/connection/chemistry with but I don't. I'd rather enjoy great & under-rated sex with the man I love vs. doing so with 5 guys who I secretely wish could not only sex me great BUT love me too! Finding that 1 guy whose great in bed is great, BUT finding that 1 guy whom you can have great sex with AND love is even GREATER!

Q: What's the longest you've ever gone without sex? (whether IN a relationship or single)
A: 1.5 years

Q: What were your reasons for going so long without it?
A: It just turned out that way... sort of. I could have had lotsa random sex if I wanted to but I don't sleep around. I actually have to like the person I'm fucking, or I derive no pleasure, and that can take some investment of my time. I had consistently been in a LTR since I started "dating" at 16. I went from one right into the other. I felt the need to hold off because I wanted to make sure I could still function as me without a significant other (basically, I didn't want to be co-dependent). Since I don't sleep around, and I was taking a long holiday from committed relationships, I ended up not having sex either.

Q: And if you didn't have actual sex, did you at least do other sexual things with others?
A: Nope. The closest I got was playful touching/teasing and I was groped a couple of times by a friend.

*Different View Point*

As of April of this year, I have taken a vow of celibacy ^_^. It depends on your experiences, personality, etc. etc. etc. but I think sex is WAY over-rated, just because it's soooo in your face.

For someone like me, it's quite a turn-off to always have some guy offering you his dick as a means of a 'new magical beginning' or as a 'key to some mystical universe that only he can take me to' .... oh my gawd whatever xD, can't be serious.

However, that's just me, I have become very turnoff from the sexual landscape, so I'm choosing to go a different route until I discover all that I tend to find. It's an experiment which is fitting because I am majoring in the sciences.


Not many chias my age are doing this but I love trying new ideas.This gives me a different perspective on things once I've learned how to keep my panties on 😉

What's the longest you've ever gone without sex? (whether IN a relationship or single)

Since April of this year. Yes, sex is important but at the same time, I can live with it until I want it again.

What were your reasons for going so long without it?

Personal decision. I need meaning for everything I do and I guess sexing aka screwing aka fucking has lost it's meaning and I'm trying to find it. It's not love that I'm looking for, but something entirely ^_^.

And if you didn't have actual sex, did you atleast do other sexual things with others?

Umm, no lol! Actually, I'm more interested in mental stimulation -- that's better than any sex on any given day ^_^. I'm sorry, it true. And I'm not into all that passionate stuff either, heavy stuff like that makes me nervous xD

Posted by CappyLuv30

Posted by cappysweetie

Actually, I'm more interested in mental stimulation -- that's better than any sex on any given day ^_^.

Heavens yeah!
That's primarily why the casual thing didn't work with me....sex was good; the experience was fun but I need depth. I need connection. The mental foreplay goes beyond any superficial conversation or other dense stupid talk that men try to feed me. I need substance. I can't do one without the other. I tried it, been there done that but now I know what I want/need. And I don't mind waiting until I get it.

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Yep, been there and done that too. It's just all very .... blah. I mean, I'm at a point in my life where if I don't have to have or if I don't have to keep it, then I won't. You know what I mean. There are so many things that are a must, why do I have to put responsibilities on myself that I don't even want? It crazy enough having to do the stuff that a must in life, those responsibilities I can handle but not the ones that are expendable.

I just can't deal with the over-sexed stuff right now, it's like, "does the end result always have to involve your dick?" — OMG, I'm like whatever xD Go to someone else, I'm sure they are gullible enough to have you, like I use to be ^_^.

Yes, I agree with you.

Hell to me, I consider anything to be over-rated the minute people start acting like they can't live without it! And sex is def. one of those things that some people are willing to ruin their lives & relationships for, die for & basically all the things they have to LOSe when the whole time, they technically COULD live without it! I have yet to see someone DIE b/c they didn't have sex! B/c so many people often have more to LOSE when having sex (self-esteem, health!, relationships, children, etc) I consider it over-rated!

Yeah sex itself is great BUT it's def. something I can live w/o. Out of the 24 hours in a day, the average person only has sex, what? 20-60 minutes altogether tops?! HA! I'd be damned if I walked around acting like I couldn't live w/o something that technically only lasted a few minutes! And hey, that's IF the sex is even good/worth it! I can't tell you how many people walk around regretting or "dogging" that very same "Sex" they swore meant the world!

HA! I'm sure those with unwanted children, HIV, & divorce papers (cheating) will agree that sex is over-rated!

This change in you girls, I believe is, you are now ready to serious find the person you want to spend your life with.

Posted by sweethearts
This change in you girls, I believe is, you are now ready to serious find the person you want to spend your life with.

This is so true for me, I've done with messing around now and saving myself for something more meaningful. Just hope im not waiting too long!

I went through that when I was younger, with women I guess it's because they appreciate that their biological clocks are ticking and if you do the maths quickly enough you realise there is a certain period of time or coupledome needed to build a relationship before the children...

Sorry Op for going off topic! Just appreciating the maturing minds.

I have gone nine years without sex it started when I was born and ended the summer of my year nine.

2 years now. I want to have it occur with someone who thinks just as much of me as I do of them. Old fashioned, yep. Tough, it's how I freaking rollllllllll.

😉

When you are younger and without family you think this way, well most women that eventually want the family thing.

I'm going through this again second time round after a 6 year breakup from my marriage. Had a little play but now looking more seriously into possible settling down again if the right man shows up.

I go all year without meeting anyone special enough to put any time in with and always somewhere around Xmas and New Year someone of interest pops up...must be holiday season. Roll on Xmas 🙂

Until this spring,it had been 3.5 years.now it's 4 months and may be years again,who knows?
I have to have love.... 🙂

I'm the mistress of my own domain. 😛

Hehehehehee. Me too, @!#!@ $ $ @#!@!!! $ $ $ !@#! and @# $ (#% $ !% $ ^)!!!!

Wait....I forgot what the contest was (on Seinfeld),I was remembering it as not shagging....I guess I am not the mistress of my domain. 🙂
but I guess I am head of security/drawbridge operator.

Embedding is disabled,but such a hilarious episode.

LMAO Seinfeld is hilarious.