Are Scorps ALWAYS this confusing?

I'm a Pisces and started seeing a Scorpio a bit lately. The first week he texted me every single day and wanted to hang out every night (Mon-Sat). He was honest in saying that he had met a girl and gone on a couple dates with her but nothing had turned serious at all. Well, the next week I try to see him Monday and he is too tired, and I understand that. So we make plans for Tuesday day, but he was still too tired. I gave up after that until Saturday (his day off) and went and hung out with him. After we, er, spent some time together. He goes into this story about how the other girl had offered to take him somewhere out of town and cancelled the last minute because her brother was coming and she didn't want her brother to see them make out. He then continues to creep her fb in front of me and show me that her brother wasn't tagged and he thinks she lied. Then he goes on to say he is going to take her to dinner the next day, so she can't make a scene, and see if she is lying. Now you can imagine.. this irked me.. I knew better though and just played the cool card. I asked him if we were talking or if we were just fooling around.. he dodged, i told him he dodged, and said if it was just a booty call I'd only have you come over for that. Well I went home, acted fine, not angry. He txted me Sunday, I didn't answer... wasn't much to answer to( he said "lol i passed the f*** out last night!"). And now I have heard nothing.. where last week everyday "how was your day?" I'm so confused... does this guy like me, is he confused, do I ignore him for a minute— OMGosh, any insight and advice or tips is soo welcomed, because I really like this guy from what I've seen. I dated an Aquarius last, everything was rather strait forward.. not like this. Please help and thank you in advance!

sounds like he's still got his ex on his mind. when that's the case, it's game over really....as far as other people are concerned.

how rude was it he got the facebook page up....were you sposed to be enthralled by it or something? personally, i would've been looking at my watch around that time and gathering my stuff together to leave. how fucking rude!!!

he's a waste of your time right now tbh. you sound like you'd be ok with that too and you don't sound like the stalky type....so he may come back when he's got his ass kicked by this girl or he may not but just don't allow yourself to be toyed with while he makes up his mind.

this sounds really horrible but i'm just trying to be honest. if i'm hung up on someone i know isn't really that bothered about me, i'll find someone else to distract me. i won't talk or discuss the person i'm hung up on though, i just won't be that into the someone else cos i'm just using them really.

the best thing at all times is to avoid ex talk on either side. to me it's a massive red flag and just makes me want out. people who can't leave the past in the past haven't left the past in the past lol. they carry it with them until they've exorcised the demons. while that process is in play, there's no scope for relationships. not healthy ones anyway.

his behavior isnt confusing... it just sucks.

im no scorpio, but am dating one and know them well enough. he might be putting you in the friend zone. if you want more, then you should tell him. if he only wants to be friends, you'll have to decide whether you can accept being his friend while he confides in you about how his hunt is going with some other girl he does like. and i wouldnt even bother doing the friends with benefits thing... that's just asking to get your feelings raped. you've already admitted you like him a lot, so dont try to convince yourself you can be an eff buddy while he's chasing skirts. not right now at least.

it is a very unsexy thing bringing up the other people you are dating to someone you are dating. thats one red flag

another red flag that i see is that he's dated this other chick for 5 minutes and he's already suspicious of her, fb stalking her (right in your face no less), and even telling you about his plots to probe her for lies.

...

and to answer your question... no. when scorpios are really in-like with you, they are never confusing or confused. just dont play games.

my advice... be turned off... be very turned off.

It's just so annoying.. He was ALLLLL about hanging out with me.. then there was just some freaking weird switch. I'm pretty sure he isn't trying to go into friend zone at all (just by the way he acts when we are together)... I just am not sure if he is just really this aloof, or really just wants ALL this attention, if he liked me and then decided they clicked more. You know, it'd be nice if he was honest with me where we are as much as he is honest about seeing other girls. I don't know, I'd love to tell you I'm just never gonna talk to him again, lol but it's probably a lie. I'll probably ignore him and if he texts again decide from there. IF he texts again. I just thought it was odd to be ignored when there was no fight or anything. Oh he also disclosed she was upset because SHE felt ignored and he told her he texts her back every time she texts him. LOL what is it with this kid? and why am I still intrigued?

And Nah, I don't do the stalker thing, then I'd be super wasting my time

when you are there in front of him, sure he'll make you feel great. that is unless, he's fb stalking some other girl in your face. lol

so, unless he really likes you... "out of sight, out of mind"

seems he's playing the field which i guess given that you've known him how long? 2 weeks? ...might be reasonable. dont hold your breath. you dont know him and with his track record there could be yet another chick next week. is he still sounding desirable?

im sure you're intrigued by some energy about him that has you hooked. there are others with the same or better who are respectful and worthwhile.

Posted by IntriguedScorp
She's hooked because he's a scorp and he's hooked because she's a fish. There is a very weird vibe happening between this pairing whether or not it works out.

Probably.. I don't know. He finally txted with the usual hows your day going bit. I don't know if I should answer or not. Not because I want to play games, just because I'm pretty confused on whats going on.

for sure... i see it a lot with scorp guys and pisces ladies.

Posted by BLONDEandPISCES

Posted by IntriguedScorp
She's hooked because he's a scorp and he's hooked because she's a fish. There is a very weird vibe happening between this pairing whether or not it works out.

Probably.. I don't know. He finally txted with the usual hows your day going bit. I don't know if I should answer or not. Not because I want to play games, just because I'm pretty confused on whats going on.

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just ask him... serious. no harm in that. if you like him, then ask. like you said... he was honest with you. be honest with him. be honest with yourself first!

Posted by CreepyPants
for sure... i see it a lot with scorp guys and pisces ladies.

lol are they all this seemingly screwy most of the time? oh, my bf is a sag and thinks the guy is possesive but i think he making convo. she said it's odd he asks me every day how my day is and what i've been up to. i don't think so, but you know, at this point i know nothing. last guy i dated an aquarius was nuts and it took me 3 months to figure that out. lol so i don't exactly feel self trusting

Posted by CreepyPants

Posted by BLONDEandPISCES

Posted by IntriguedScorp
She's hooked because he's a scorp and he's hooked because she's a fish. There is a very weird vibe happening between this pairing whether or not it works out.

Probably.. I don't know. He finally txted with the usual hows your day going bit. I don't know if I should answer or not. Not because I want to play games, just because I'm pretty confused on whats going on.

just ask him... serious. no harm in that. if you like him, then ask. like you said... he was honest with you. be honest with him. be honest with yourself first!

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lol i kinda tried to saturday. when i asked.. he was vague about an answer of it we were talking but def telling me that it wasn't just booty callish. he never ever directly answers things, maybe it stems from his dad being a lawyer hahaha

Posted by Nemesis
lol@all the fucking excuses.

Are you taking about me or him?

Posted by IntriguedScorp

Posted by CreepyPants
when you are there in front of him, sure he'll make you feel great. that is unless, he's fb stalking some other girl in your face. lol

Hahaha. True. lol

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lol it was really bizarre. if i wouldn't have been in such complete shock, i would have grabbed my purse and left. i've never had anything near that ever happen. definitely one of those times i didn't do what i wanted to do when i look back at it.

eeeesh... i dunno, darlin.

watch your step and watch his as well. and please be sure you are getting what you want out of this... i'm saying that specifically to you, a pisces gal dealing with a scorp guy.

Posted by Nemesis

Posted by BLONDEandPISCES

Posted by Nemesis
lol@all the fucking excuses.

Are you taking about me or him?

both. it takes two to tango.

it's pretty clear and easy for an outsider "too see" - but you??re stuck in the middle of this with all the emotions and expectations and desires....

scorp & pisces = masterminds of manipulation.

at this stage - imo, take your hat and say goodbye. or stay and fall flat on your face.

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Meh, we definitely are. That's why I posted on here to talk to people what was going on. I'm being a little bit more cautious about it all and trying to weigh some things out.

Posted by CreepyPants
eeeesh... i dunno, darlin.

watch your step and watch his as well. and please be sure you are getting what you want out of this... i'm saying that specifically to you, a pisces gal dealing with a scorp guy.

thanks, i really appreciate it. right now it's just hard to see where to even step. LOL

Posted by ellessque

Posted by Nemesis

Posted by BLONDEandPISCES

Posted by Nemesis
lol@all the fucking excuses.

Are you taking about me or him?

both. it takes two to tango.

it's pretty clear and easy for an outsider "too see" - but you??re stuck in the middle of this with all the emotions and expectations and desires....

scorp & pisces = masterminds of manipulation.

at this stage - imo, take your hat and say goodbye. or stay and fall flat on your face.

that's why i asked why she was sleeping with him.

seems both are equally guilty.

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lol how is someone guilty of games if they sleep with someone? also i said fooled around, not slept with.

Posted by Nemesis

Posted by ellessque

Posted by Nemesis

Posted by BLONDEandPISCES

Posted by Nemesis
lol@all the fucking excuses.

Are you taking about me or him?

both. it takes two to tango.

it's pretty clear and easy for an outsider "too see" - but you??re stuck in the middle of this with all the emotions and expectations and desires....

scorp & pisces = masterminds of manipulation.

at this stage - imo, take your hat and say goodbye. or stay and fall flat on your face.

that's why i asked why she was sleeping with him.

seems both are equally guilty.

well elle, there are various reasons why we sleep with people - i suppose trying to hook somebody is one of them.

but that aside, blondepisces - ask yourself what you want of this guy/situation.

ask him if he can provide that/is ready for that etc.

based on his REAL & INITIAL reaction - decide what to do next.

that's all i have to say. and take care. 🙂

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Well thank you for your insight. I supposed some girls do sleep with guys for that reason, it's pretty shady. I wait until I am actually dating someone to sleep with them though. Not sure where all this applied to my question, but it's out there and that's fine.

+1 to everything Nemesis (my chart homie) said. I'm also a Pisces with a Scorp ex, so I understand the pull you feel toward this guy.

But regardless of what sign this guy is, pulling up some other girl's FB in front of you, AND discussing it with you is:

1. Insensitive
2. A clear indicator of where you fall in the pecking order

Personally, it seems to me like you're in a really early stage in getting to know each other. From what I read, he seems not very emotionally invested in you--and quite emotionally invested in the other female. You need to look at this from a logical stand point right now, even though you may be feeling sentimental or longing for him. He is still focused on the other woman, still looking obsessively at her facebook page, talking to you about her, not defining the relationship between yourself and him. Red flags.
Darling, I think you may be an emotional crutch for him right now..and I'm afraid he could be using you to make himself feel better. I don't think his signals are confusing, I believe you deserve someone who see's you and only you. No more ridiculous charades of "hooking up" with no real emotional commitment, if you're searching for more--it -will- burn you in the end.
If a Scorpio really wants you- you will hear of no other.

Posted by ellessque
she's so riddled with bullshit she can't even admit she's fucking him.

...and who is playing games?

he sounds like a douche.
you sound like you had an agenda.

neither one of your were taking the other seriously.

why bother at this point?

Agreed, except I don't think she had an agenda - I think it's more likely classic Pisces delusion. So obsessed with your desired outcome that you delude yourself into thinking there is a "reason" for everything the guy does, when all the signs point to the fact that he's just a marker. (Been there, done that once upon a time)

Newbie here. But I simply had to comment. I've just recently had my dealings with a Scorpio. So I totally understand the "connection". I cut him lose cos he couldn't give me what I wanted. Did he tell me that? "No". But his actions did. He couldn't make a decision bout what to do about our situation. So I kindly told him that "not making a decision was a decision in itself" and walked. Haven't heard from him in over a month since, and doubt I will. But I guarantee he will have more respect for me by not hanging round putting up with his butter. Look at your scorpios actions. Never make anybody a priority when your only an option. If you want to keep in touch with him simply as friends then cool. But no messing about and no second guessing his moves. I live by one rule in my relationships. Good things don't feel bad....ever!!

Posted by ellessque
she's so riddled with bullshit she can't even admit she's fucking him.

...and who is playing games?

he sounds like a douche.
you sound like you had an agenda.

neither one of your were taking the other seriously.

why bother at this point?

I'm being defensive clearly on the way you have posted things. I'm not gonna admit to something I haven't done. I know it may seem surprising that not all people just hop into bed if they like someone and are seeing where it's going. It's the early stages, and I do take people I'm interested in seriously. I'm not sure where you don't think I may be offended by that. I haven't attacked you at all or made assumptions, I don't know you and you don't know me. All I asked from people is to hear the situation and give me insight.

Posted by Missymadaries
Newbie here. But I simply had to comment. I've just recently had my dealings with a Scorpio. So I totally understand the "connection". I cut him lose cos he couldn't give me what I wanted. Did he tell me that? "No". But his actions did. He couldn't make a decision bout what to do about our situation. So I kindly told him that "not making a decision was a decision in itself" and walked. Haven't heard from him in over a month since, and doubt I will. But I guarantee he will have more respect for me by not hanging round putting up with his butter. Look at your scorpios actions. Never make anybody a priority when your only an option. If you want to keep in touch with him simply as friends then cool. But no messing about and no second guessing his moves. I live by one rule in my relationships. Good things don't feel bad....ever!!

Thanks you for the advice. I guess I didn't look at it in that aspect prior to this. Him and I talked tonight about the situation, because I decide to just flat out ask. It seemed easier than guessing. I get the vibe that he is genuinely confused between this girl and I, and I guess they have been seeing each other a week prior to him and I (not that it matters). But even though there was some level of reassurance and honesty, if I continue it on then I'm competing for a guy that I like, not love, and I'm just not in the mood to play all that out. I'm really digging him a bit, but this just seems like too much. And I like the quote, you are right, "good things don't feel bad ever".

He's not confused, you're confused and that confusion stems from not picking up the many queues that non-verbally says I'm not that into you.

If he's too tired 2 or more days to go out, dodging, blowing you off, if he speak about another woman in your face, stalk her in your face, basically if he does anything in your face that has to do with another woman and he has absolutely no focus on you for the exception of putting his penis in your vagina then "he's not that into you", he's rejecting you by blowing you off and focusing his 99% of his attention on someone else in your face. Attempting to avoid the truth in favor of your idea/fantasy is a recipe for disaster, mainly you getting hurt, feeling used, none of this feels good I'm sure and unless you're a sadist I suggest you move on.

Posted by ellessque
these are your words....

"I knew better though and just played the cool card. I asked him if we were talking or if we were just fooling around.. he dodged, i told him he dodged, and said if it was just a booty call I'd only have you come over for that."

regardless if you were really sleeping with him or not, which I think you were but won't say so now, you were being used. He wasn't interested in you the way you thought. His attention was with the other girl and you just happened to get tangled up in that. Perhaps he looked at you as a friend and you offered yourself.....it doesn't mean that he thought of you more of a friend because you did.

sex doesn't equal "I'm going to be your boyfriend now"....if he wasn't your boyfriend beforehand.

I'm not arguing the first part, because a booty call can be just messing around.. you know we manipulate as a Pisces? then you know the whole he won't buy the cow getting the milk for for free, so i just don't, not that it's your business and i'm sure you knowing me means i'm a liar. that's me being honest. I also don't believe sex=equals boyfriend. I needed advice because I was genuinely interested him.. and in the things we talked about with each other the 9 times we hung out before we did anything but kiss (during those 9 dates not after so you are clear, since you want to pull apart posts I'm clearing it up). I'm not exactly sure why you are still going on about this, your intent wasn't to really try to help.. due to preconceived notions, or maybe you thought you were. I actually read a post a bit before I posted this, looking for a bit of advice, and you came off the same way to that girl, and I said to myself "i hope she doesn't pop up on mine. she doesn't seem like she even gets how offensive she can come off as". And I defend myself. I'm not a slut, I haven't just been going to his house to just mess around, because I'm a Pisces doesn't mean every single Pisces attribute applies to me. I explained in above what I'm doing, so I won't again. You seem to be quite judgmental, and it boggles my mind to why as this post bugs you enough to continuously come on to call me a liar and basically a slut. i needed help because i was feeling hurt and down, having someone come on here the way you do is rude, you call it "honest", is a bit uncalled for.. don't have advice or help? then don't post. though it's a fre

Sleeping with a guy you like makes you a slut? Hmm.. guess I'm a slut then, and always have been. Unapologetic, too. *shrug*

btw that's just Elle's Aries Moon and Sag Merc showing through.. she really isn't as bitchy as she comes across.. she's a total sweetheart under those prickles, I promise. But even I thought you were using cutesy euphemisms and being intentionally vague in order to not openly admit you had sex with this guy in the middle of this oogy love-triangle situation. *shrug* Don't care if you did or did not have sex with him, and believe it or not, either does Elle. But she's big on truth.. and your Fishy evasiveness didn't look much like truth, even from here.


Like Tiki, I don't really see anything "confusing" in this guy's words and actions.. to me, his words AND actions clearly say, "I like this OTHER girl, but you'll do for a back up plan. You know, in case I get lonely or horny." Personally, I won't be some guy's Fallback girl, his Backburner girl while he's tangled up with some other chick. I won't compete for a man's attention or affection. Now, he's welcome to take all the "time" & "space" he needs to work shit out for himself, date other women, whatever.. he just can't have ME ALSO in the meantime. I wouldn't waste my precious head space on a man who's "just not that into" me, much less my time and attention. But maybe that's just me. Maybe I'm just a bitch who thinks she deserves the very best a man can give, and anything less is unacceptable. *shrug* Yeah, that's probably it.

Posted by seraph
This is interesting now.

BLONDEandPISCES, are you interested in looking at your role in all this from an astrological perspective, or were you just curious to know about the guy's interest level?

More on a are Scorpios a confusing sign to usually deal with?

@Nefer

Not trying to be evasive. I've made it clear what I have and have not done, I just think it's pointless to sit on a post and call me a liar and etc when she doesn't know who I am or how I am as a person. Avoiding talking about it? More so because that's not the point of my post. The point was to try to figure out where things stand, and people's point of view on it, if they have been in similar situations, not on whether or not I put out or why. I did get some answers that I read and made me think and made me make up my mind, as posted. But I find it bizarre to try to sit there and pull apart what people say because YOU believe they are lying, and maybe they just aren't exactly comfortable with going into their intimate life above what they already said. Also, to lie about sleeping with someone would defeat the purpose of my post, because it then it changes up the scheme of the whole thing. I think that it was a rather judgmental approach. Then to keep pushing it seems immature. I think if someone has nothing productive to put to a post, then don't post. I don't post to post. There is nothing productive or helpful, only a bit condescending about "why are you sleeping with him?" But I do appreciate the advice I have received from some people, and also feel rather deterred from posting in the forums, just like it deterred me from posting anything else about this situation. This is supposed to be a place for help and advice from people, or just for fun. You shouldn't be upset and post something, and then feel like you are being judged and ridiculed by someone who doesn't know you when you are down.

Posted by BLONDEandPISCES

Posted by seraph
This is interesting now.

BLONDEandPISCES, are you interested in looking at your role in all this from an astrological perspective, or were you just curious to know about the guy's interest level?

More on a are Scorpios a confusing sign to usually deal with?

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And game players, liars, etc etc.. if people had insight on the situation at hand, awesome. was looking for less personal criticism though (not directed towards you)

Posted by BLONDEandPISCES

Posted by Missymadaries
Newbie here. But I simply had to comment. I've just recently had my dealings with a Scorpio. So I totally understand the "connection". I cut him lose cos he couldn't give me what I wanted. Did he tell me that? "No". But his actions did. He couldn't make a decision bout what to do about our situation. So I kindly told him that "not making a decision was a decision in itself" and walked. Haven't heard from him in over a month since, and doubt I will. But I guarantee he will have more respect for me by not hanging round putting up with his butter. Look at your scorpios actions. Never make anybody a priority when your only an option. If you want to keep in touch with him simply as friends then cool. But no messing about and no second guessing his moves. I live by one rule in my relationships. Good things don't feel bad....ever!!

Thanks you for the advice. I guess I didn't look at it in that aspect prior to this. Him and I talked tonight about the situation, because I decide to just flat out ask. It seemed easier than guessing. I get the vibe that he is genuinely confused between this girl and I, and I guess they have been seeing each other a week prior to him and I (not that it matters). But even though there was some level of reassurance and honesty, if I continue it on then I'm competing for a guy that I like, not love, and I'm just not in the mood to play all that out. I'm really digging him a bit, but this just seems like too much. And I like the quote, you are right, "good things don't feel bad ever".

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@ BLONDEPISCIS, YOU CAME TO THIS BOARD TO FIND OUT ABOUT A MALE SCORPIO THEY NOT JUDGING AS MUCH AS JUST TELLING WHAT THEY SEE POINT BLANK, BUT I'VE. NOTICE YOUR NOT TAKING HEALTHY ADVICE FROM EVERYONE. IT SEEMS TO ME YOU ARE NOT NOTICING WHAT SCORP IS DOING AND YOU WANT TO BELIEVE HE'S CONFUSED BC YOUR DIGGIN HIM.. THIS GUY IS NOT CONFUSED HE'S KNOWS HOW TO PLAY HEAD GAMES HE TELLS YOU BS. ABOUT THE GIRL SHOWS YOU THE FACEBOOK BECUZ YOU ALLOW THE DISRESPECT, BESIDES DO YOU REALLY WANT TO BE IN ARELATIONSHIP. WHERE YOURE SECOND TO FIRST. THE TRUTH IS HES DISRESPECTFUL AND HES NOT INTO ANYONE, NOR IS HE CONFUSED HES JUST BASICLY PLAYING GAMES WITH YOU OR BOTH OF YOU BECAUSE YOUR ALLOWING HIM AND HE KNOWS THIS . FOR THAT MATTER, HE WILL CONT

DOING THIS ASLONG YOU ALLOW HIM. IF YOU ASK ME LET GO OF THIS LOOSER. AND ALLOWCROOM FORVREAL GUY TO COME IN YOUR LIFE AND SEE YOU FOR THE KIND HEARTED PERSON YOU CAN BE, SOMEONE WHO IN THE END OF THE DAY RESPECTS U AND TREATS YOU HOW YOU DESERVE TO BE TREATED! AND NOT PLAY ON YOUR NAIVE FEELING CONFRONT HIM IF YOU WANT IF HE LIES OR TELL. THE TRUTH SEEMS YOU WANT TO BELIEVE WHAT U WANT.

GOOD LUCK HOPE U MAKE THE RIGHT DECISIONS

Posted by ellessque

Posted by ellessque
why are you sleeping with him?

Posted by ellessque
that's why i asked why she was sleeping with him.
seems both are equally guilty.

Posted by ellessque
why are you being defensive?

Posted by ellessque
she's so riddled with bullshit she can't even admit she's fucking him.
...and who is playing games?

he sounds like a douche.
you sound like you had an agenda.

neither one of your were taking the other seriously.
why bother at this point?

Posted by ellessque
these are your words....

"I knew better though and just played the cool card. I asked him if we were talking or if we were just fooling around.. he dodged, i told him he dodged, and said if it was just a booty call I'd only have you come over for that."

regardless if you were really sleeping with him or not, which I think you were but won't say so now, you were being used. He wasn't interested in you the way you thought. His attention was with the other girl and you just happened to get tangled up in that. Perhaps he looked at you as a friend and you offered yourself.....it doesn't mean that he thought of you more of a friend because you did.

sex doesn't equal "I'm going to be your boyfriend now"....if he wasn't your boyfriend beforehand.

I did not call you a liar or a slut, and have absolutely no clue why you are twisting my words. I've basically said the same things others have said in this thread, you obviously have a problem with me personally.

do what you like....but tiki and nefer are spot on in their assessment of your situation. you are a fallback, a sideline chic and I don't know how many different ways you need to be told before you stop looking for that one word or one sentence that gives you enough false hope to close your browser and feel good about the situation.

good luck 🙂

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Well what you say comes off abrasive, sorry. And like I said, made my choice. I did listen to advice and decided on things myself.

The only thing abrasive is your refusal to acknowledge truth and continue to call the Scorpio's behavior confusing when he's done NOTHING confusing, the only confusion is your inability to acknowledge to yourself that the guy you're dealing with isn't into you because he's into someone else.

I beg to disagree. His behaviour does sound confusing, and I totally understand why she is confused. We've all liked somebody and have got ourselves in a pickle cos our emotions are invested. I know I have done the right thing walking away from my scorp, but it doesn't stop me from second guessing myself from time to time. I have to tell myself to shut up often, and remind myself that's why I walked away. He would of driven me crazy trying to figure him out. Been there done that before...complete waste of time. Don't be too hard on the girl. It's difficult when it's happening to you. We all have to live and learn.

He was consistent in the beginning as in communicating but the moment he began to speak to her about this woman it was a wrap, it was over, that's her queue to move along and on top of that she ASKED if they were together or just fooling around and he DODGED, that's another queue to move along, he was not confusing, what was confusing is she stuck around after he dissed her in her face.

And notice the woman who got him was the one who wasn't that nice, wasn't that interested in him, stood him up which means he NEED a challenge to continue to stay interested and the woman that behave like an unavailable not interested bitch got his mind, attention and thus got his heart. She'll have to be a little bit meaner to keep him keen--into her.

He really wasn't that clear though prior to that night, that's what shocked me. You have someone message you every day asking how you are, how your day is, what your plans are, etc etc.. I can't wait to see you.. and then it's a slap in the face. It WAS confusing for me. I'm not trying to not acknowledge the truth.. I keep saying I made my decision after what happened. I did just really needed to know if I was confused because his actions DID come across as good intentions, and not like he was trying to play me. He was fine I wasn't putting out and everything. I just didn't get how he could be texting me every day and all about my life.. then a girl he ORIGINALLY said he had 2 dates with becomes part of a topic. I don't try to excuse his actions or make up what I WANT in my mind, I've been pretty sure of what it was. The signals were mixed A LOT, and if someone wants to say they weren't, I didn't give much of them. Also, as for my hidden agenda, no. I'd like to think of anything to have a hidden agenda for! So.... I know I am the type of person who jumps to conclusions, and I didn't want to do that this time. I just wanted kind insight onto all this so I came here looking for some objective (non judgmental advice.. probably a little.. can u give us a little more of whats been going on there). And it sucks because I don't feel comfortable opening up on here now.. and this was a release for me. People never know the whole situation(not talking about him but me) or how hurt they/I are/am. I just feel some careless words were thrown around and stamped with what FELT like assumptions based on my sign or how I worded things (which I would have been grateful to clarify). I didn't reach out to feel criticized, or dumb for posting.. but because I was hurt to begin with and not sure if my head or heart was right. And as I said, I made the choice. I hate how this has gotten off the main subject. I apologize if I offended anyone here, that wasn't my intention. Mine was to clear a hazy situation in a healthy way.

If I came across judgmental I sincerely apologize, I've been in your shoes and I know how awful it feels to like a guy only for him to turn around mid start and begin liking someone else in your face but knowing that I've been there well I know there are signs that aren't confusing and the huge red flag (discussing another woman in your face consistently) is quite easy to notice, once he shifts his attention elsewhere it's a wrap, lose interest and should be over for you because sticking around after he's blatantly shown disregard for you is when the confusion comes into play. My suggestion is this, once a man openly disregards you by bringing another woman up LEAVE, don't stick around because you'll feel less valued which can inevitably kick down your self esteem. It's important to stick with a guy that's into you consistently or you'll become confused, feel toyed with, it's not worth it.

Posted by tiki33
He was consistent in the beginning as in communicating but the moment he began to speak to her about this woman it was a wrap, it was over, that's her queue to move along and on top of that she ASKED if they were together or just fooling around and he DODGED, that's another queue to move along, he was not confusing, what was confusing is she stuck around after he dissed her in her face.

+1000000 ....lol SOO. SOO TRUE COULDNT UT IT ANY BETTA! SHE FIGHTING. A NO WIN CAUSE SHE WANTS TO TRULY BELIEVE HES DA ONE CONFUSED WRONG!!!!! HE KNOWS WHAT HE DOING AND DOING IT WELL HAS HER BELIGERANT!! OPEN YOUR EYES GIRL! HE IS USING YOU!

Posted by tiki33
If I came across judgmental I sincerely apologize, I've been in your shoes and I know how awful it feels to like a guy only for him to turn around mid start and begin liking someone else in your face but knowing that I've been there well I know there are signs that aren't confusing and the huge red flag (discussing another woman in your face consistently) is quite easy to notice, once he shifts his attention elsewhere it's a wrap, lose interest and should be over for you because sticking around after he's blatantly shown disregard for you is when the confusion comes into play. My suggestion is this, once a man openly disregards you by bringing another woman up LEAVE, don't stick around because you'll feel less valued which can inevitably kick down your self esteem. It's important to stick with a guy that's into you consistently or you'll become confused, feel toyed with, it's not worth it.

Thanks and yeah, I realize that after talking on here. He keeps txting, I just don't answer back... the few times I did at first I just gave short answers. Then finally, not at all. Not sure why he keeps texting? Maybe some back burner type thing? But honestly I feel just too tired for it all, so I just stopped.

Between this guy and my ex, I keep hoping I'll either find a good hiding hole for a week to clear my brain, or become asexual. lol

Of course you're the backup plan, the backup woman is there to help him stave off desperation for the other girl, being the backup you keep him feeling sane as he actively chases someone else and now that you dropped him he has no back up at all, he has to feel the consequences of his actions, he lost, he's the loser, LET HIM feel the consequences because that's the only way he'll get in touch with his own feelings, he'll have time to THINK about how he behaved with you and possibly alter his behavior without you having to nudge him to it, don't take him back until he demonstrate his appreciation for having you in his life.

Posted by tiki33
Of course you're the backup plan, the backup woman is there to help him stave off desperation for the other girl, being the backup you keep him feeling sane as he actively chases someone else and now that you dropped him he has no back up at all, he has to feel the consequences of his actions, he lost, he's the loser, LET HIM feel the consequences because that's the only way he'll get in touch with his own feelings, he'll have time to THINK about how he behaved with you and possibly alter his behavior without you having to nudge him to it, don't take him back until he demonstrate his appreciation for having you in his life.

Thanks, I appreciate what you've said. Today is the first day he hasn't texted me, and my friends are all saying "Yeah, no, he will be back... Scorpios always come back." But this has ultimately became a big turn off to me. It sucks, you know, because I honestly thought he was a pretty cool guy, and it's the first person I've had interest in since my ex (Aquarius, who keeps coming back lol). It was nice feeling that connection again with someone, my ex tore my heart up pretty bad.. Bad enough to the point I really didn't want to date anyone or think of dating anyone at all for a bit, which is weird for me because I usually hate not being in a relationship (and yes, i know that is bad, so anyone who reads this there and wants to jump.. don't... really don't. i know, and i genuinely work on it). Hell, this Scorp asked me to go out multiple times before I hesitantly said OK. This just all makes me feel double rejected. ANNNDD now I'm rambling

Give it time, time is what's needed for a guy to figure out he's messed up with you, as for feeling rejected in all honesty he wasn't really rejecting you, he was just making really DUMB ASS choices around you, his choice to do what he did has absolutely nothing to do with you and everything to do with him.

You're supposed to notice when a man isn't giving you his full attention and energy and you're supposed to leave when you notice the lack of attention and appreciation so you see it's all how you see the situation, it's easy to beat up on yourself but DON'T because you didn't do anything to provoke this kind of behavior from him, he chose to be the way he was and you chose to distance yourself from his behavior.

You cannot keep rewarding him with MORE OF YOURSELF when he's clearly demonstrating bad behavior in front of you, once that kind of cycle of accepting undesirable behavior begins just to keep him around (once he sniff desperation from you) you'll never be treated with genuine love and care from a man so to preserve your own self esteem and confidence it's in your best interest to only be around men/people that care about you and your feelings, anything less is not worthy of you.