Do you feel you give more in a friendship then you receive in return?

I'm that friend that all my friends turn to for help. They know I'll be honest with them, bend over back wards for them in a time of need, I'll stand up for them, I'm loyal to the core etc. but I feel like my friends can't offer me the same in return.
I know it's just my nature but it frustrates me. I try to tell myself that not everyone is going to care as much as I do, but it doesn't help the fact that I still get so disappointed when my friends let me down.
Is this a Scorpio thing because we are so passionate and loyal? My mum is also a Scorpio and she was saying the same thing to me this morning about going out of her way for people when everyone else just cares about número uno and won't put themselves out for her if there's no benefit in it for them

Posted by scorpvixen
I'm that friend that all my friends turn to for help. They know I'll be honest with them, bend over back wards for them in a time of need, I'll stand up for them, I'm loyal to the core etc. but I feel like my friends can't offer me the same in return.
I know it's just my nature but it frustrates me. I try to tell myself that not everyone is going to care as much as I do, but it doesn't help the fact that I still get so disappointed when my friends let me down.
Is this a Scorpio thing because we are so passionate and loyal? My mum is also a Scorpio and she was saying the same thing to me this morning about going out of her way for people when everyone else just cares about número uno and won't put themselves out for her if there's no benefit in it for them

Wow...three "expectation" threads back to back. I don't get it, and NO it's not a "Scorpio thing"... However, I see you were raised this way and learned this from your mom.

Typically, people who like to give (whatever it is) to others, is out of the goodness of their hearts without feeling bad after doing so. The only time it turns sour is when an expectation follows and disappointment consumes you.

Yes as a scorpio I am so passionate and very Loyal.I feel this way all the time.I try not to expect anything in return for my Loyalty,I've made my peace with it.I used to be so frustrated when my friends let me down but not anymore.its who I am and I can't change it.Don't be frustrated,just do you whether they come through for you when you need them or Not.

I'm a Pisces sun, only Scorpio in my chart is Pluto. But yes, I've struggled with this in the past. I'm far too giving and generous with people and sometimes people take advantage.

I had to walk away from a decade long friendship because she was leeching the life from me. As I get older I'm getting better at recognizing when a new 'friend' is really just trying to take all they can get. After cutting out some toxic people, Ive met some really great ones. Sometimes you need to let go of the bad to have room for the good.

Also I'm learning to set boundaries with myself and elevate my own needs over others.

Yes. My sister is like this too though. She's a sag with a Scorpio moon.

I always wondered about this and thought it only had to do with me as a person. Now it seems that's some kind of scorpio trait. And I'm a scorpio 100% ... feeling better already. Thanks for this post!

you are right @LetitB it is an expectation that I am definitely trying to work on. I know I shouldn't expect the same kind of treatment from others as we are not all built the same way, it still doesn't help the feeling of disappointment though.
AND Id also like to just say that I don't feel bad after I do something nice for a friend, I don't sit there thinking of the day when they can repay me, I'm just there being a good friend, so I don't know where you got that idea from.
When you Assume, you make an ASS out of U and ME!

Posted by scorpvixen

AND Id also like to just say that I don't feel bad after I do something nice for a friend, so I don't know where you got that idea from.
When you Assume, you make an ASS out of U and ME!

I won't tell you where I got ^^that idea from, I'LL SHOW YOU WHERE I GOT IT FROM..

Posted by scorpvixenI feel like my friends can't offer me the same in return.
I know it's just my nature but it frustrates me. I try to tell myself that not everyone is going to care as much as I do, but it doesn't help the fact that I still get so disappointed when my friends let me down.

click to expand

I'm not an ass, I don't assume. That's ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^where I got it from, THOSE ARE YOUR WORDS. smfh

Well you are, because no where does it state that I feel bad for doing the things I do! so you are putting words in my mouth, they are not my words. Please highlight where I state "I feel bad after I do things for friends"!!!

I said I feel disappointed when my friends let me down, that's not the same as feeling bad for doing good for them!

SO PLEASE SHOW ME MY APPARENT WORDS (can use cap lock too)

ok..frustration and being let down are a good thing in your book... Got it. No caps needed. I'll take ass as a compliment too. 😉

Haha what the fuck are you talking about! Couldn't show me factual evidence so you try to use sarcasm. Didn't anyone ever tell you that sarcasm is the lowest form of wit?
Anyway, I'll leave you to sit on the Internet, trying to start irrelevant fights with people you don't know and put words in their mouths...you're so cool man.

k... 😉

And the worst is when people take it for granted. It's like no matter how much ever bad they do, they know I'll always have their back so, they don't bother being grateful. The other day, I was talking to my best friend and he mentioned talking about me to another friend of his. He tells her (his friend), and I quote, "No matter how many mistakes I make or how many ever times I anger her, she (me) always comes back. " Looks like I'm already sick of it.

Ah whatev... I have like the same philosophy as Get Misted.

If you think about it the ones that take ARE NOT YOUR FRIENDS!!!!

This happened to me especially a lot last year in college, etc. It's because I expected too much from people, for them to have common courtesy's etc. Doesn't really work like that.

Those are snakes and rats that want to rob you of your time or money because they need to use someone.


Furthermore, this has been a much better year for me in the "friends department' because of those tough lessons, adapting my expectations of people and setting more boundaries.

I'm not a Scorpio, but I give a lot in friendships sometimes too much.

Scorp moon. Mars in virgo. Everyone just takes takes takes takes.

Im shutting off the tap

Yeah my interpretation and I think the posters' interpretation is someone gets the best of the other person and it's not balanced a balanced relationship.

You to balance each other out with different skills ok I see that.

I can't disagree I really don't attach emotions to anything that's not "important" However Cap's and Scorps are similar in many aspects---being friendship. Scorps have trust issues and Caps are logical-- that logic usually lends toward a few good friends.


However

Ellesque maybe you are missing my point of give and take which maybe I haven't even described.

Basically it's availability--- looking out for other people texting them, having courtesy, caring (I'm not heartless neither are Caps--we just CONTROL our emotions because Saturn restricts everything. What I was basically meaning is how much one person invests in the relationship vs. the other and doing so genuinely not being fake. Because a lot of people are fake and those are the "takers" if you let them.

I think I see things more like a Scorpio then you think.

That's not trueeee in real life that is astrology.


Your Aires moon doesn't help---That's why you don't get along with Caps.

You don't know enough Caps then. I know a shit ton of Scorpios mostly male.

They tend to be very genuine and not really emotional

I don't look down on emotional investments as fake --- emotions are just a lesser priority for me


When someone is genuine I appreciate it no matter how they show it (logic not emotions)

I think Scorps are really logical too; however they guard themselves and have the rep of being over suspicious--think ever one is out to get them

One thing I'm bad at is giving advice. I alwyays try to fix problems because of a lot of Cap energy and my Virgo moon. I especially when I was younger just wanted to find a solution.

Idk-- I'm just of the mindset of be practical and things will get better.

That also comes from my Optimistic Sag Ascendant

That's where I am different from a lot of people-- I don't hold on to shit I just keep moving

Posted by scorpvixen
I'm that friend that all my friends turn to for help. They know I'll be honest with them, bend over back wards for them in a time of need, I'll stand up for them, I'm loyal to the core etc. but I feel like my friends can't offer me the same in return.
I know it's just my nature but it frustrates me. I try to tell myself that not everyone is going to care as much as I do, but it doesn't help the fact that I still get so disappointed when my friends let me down.
Is this a Scorpio thing because we are so passionate and loyal? My mum is also a Scorpio and she was saying the same thing to me this morning about going out of her way for people when everyone else just cares about número uno and won't put themselves out for her if there's no benefit in it for them

Perhaps you shouldn't see it as "how much" and try to see it as simply "different". This isn't about matching you tit for tat. Otherwise it comes off like you're only doing something to get something. Is that the case?

People give of themselves what they can. If you can't accept that, this may be your thing.

As for your title question, no I don't feel I give more than I get. I don't even think this a Scorp thing as I've read it on pretty much every board.

Again you have an Aires moon and you have to much Libra isn't that kinda Square to Cap—
It would be silly
You might go Aires or more likely Libra. I think would work with you.


What does genuine mean to you?

Astrologically Capricorns are a nightmare for you. It's not the Scorp energy alone it's the other aspects a lot more.

I mean but I'm being serious your relationships and astrology agree. Just based of you having an Aires Moon and a lot of Libra (even though I admire Libras) Its not a long term investment. Plus I have Taurus Mars which makes me fight with Scorpio males and Females more than any other sign.


Your supporting aspects say no Capricorn for you (Soup Nazi voice)

Is it his Pluto. It really depends on the houses too. Astromatrix.org is good for synastry. It desxribes in depth.

I don't ask for anything, so even though I give a lot I don't think it's fair for me to say they don't give as much because I never ask. I think they would if I did

I assumed it was his Pluto.... BC you were both born between the cutoff sometime between 1983/4 and 1995. So as I expected it was his. Which means with Mercury guess what he's secretive and suspicious( bad communication Pluto is secretive in that situation)

Jupiter squares always point to bad timing

Those too are really tight but how could your Sun be Square if you are a Scorp and his Pluto is in Scorp.

Scorpios are good at screwing with me how are you. My Neptune conjunct sun is slightly oblivious.

No matter when you were born the same baically applies. Anytime Jupiter is square anything it's arguably the toughest aspect because Jupiter is like giber of life and hope and Squares fuck it up. I have a retrograde Jupiter which sucks. Cap Jupiter just takes discipline but actually isn't a bad placement. It kinds makes you not super optimistic but like a realistic optimist.

I do have a sense of humor. We understand each other. Outside of the generic attacks to Caps which I guess were jokes. I have no hard feelings. That's why I'm trying to help figure out the problem... Virgo moon and get s solution. Yeah😄

Thank you I like your profile pic too. I like being adored.

Posted by GetMisted

Posted by scorpvixen
I'm that friend that all my friends turn to for help. They know I'll be honest with them, bend over back wards for them in a time of need, I'll stand up for them, I'm loyal to the core etc. but I feel like my friends can't offer me the same in return.
I know it's just my nature but it frustrates me. I try to tell myself that not everyone is going to care as much as I do, but it doesn't help the fact that I still get so disappointed when my friends let me down.
Is this a Scorpio thing because we are so passionate and loyal? My mum is also a Scorpio and she was saying the same thing to me this morning about going out of her way for people when everyone else just cares about número uno and won't put themselves out for her if there's no benefit in it for them

First off, I believe there are many ways to "give" in a friendship. There are also several ways to "take".

I have very few friends. Not because people don't enjoy my company, but because I generally can't stand to be around most folks.. and because friendship to me, means we share an almost blind loyalty to one another.

I use my Aries buddy as an example most often when I speak of friendship. I'd give the shirt off my back for that man, and I have.. Helped him through some tough times. He's done the same for me though. When life gets to be too much, we're always there for each other. We've let each other down however.. because we're not perfect. But the bond between us keeps us together no matter the disagreement.

With that being said.. I'm a very selfish friend. Not with my money. Not with my advice. But with my time. Simply put, I don't make time for anyone except for myself. The few people that are content with that, know that I may not be there today, but when you really need me.. I will be there, and I know I can expect the same from them.

So to answer your question.. I would say no. I don't feel I give more than my friends. There is no expectation except for when the world is falling down around us.

That's the only time it really matters.

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Well put.

whenever i feel like that i tell myself im being selfish