nedrea
@nedrea
15 Years
Comments: 0 · Posts: 51 · Topics: 1
I think this scorp might be taking me for granted.
What a jerk. I'd walk away for a while, really make him MISS those massages and dinner. Should get him feeling appreciative.
I know. I feel like there's a lot of anger, and even though its not directed toward me, it inevitably spills over from time to time. I'm trying to understand this. Do scorps have an innate insecurity?
hahahahahahah... do scorps have an innate insecurity? Not that we'll admit to 😛
Posted by Skykomish
hahahahahahah... do scorps have an innate insecurity? Not that we'll admit to 😛
^ this!!
As for the back and leg rubs and other things you may do for him out of love... I remember doing these things for my previous partner. I also told him that I don't like cooking or doing house work and all of that....all of the things woman used to do for their partners I don't like doing but I would to show my love...unless it became expected of me. The minute I felt like what I was doing was expected instead of appreciated I would stop. Because I wasn't doing those things as a job..I was doing them out of love. I would think "Oh he's had a hard day at work, it won't take me much to fold the washing then he can rest for a little longer." As soon as it became expected..."why haven't you folded the washing yet?"...I would stop. Because it wasn't my job. We didn't even live together. It wasn't my stuff.
I think I would react the same to affection. If I were to give my partner massages I would be doing it out of love. I would want him to feel good. I wouldn't be doing it as a job.
So if I were you I would stop for a while. Make him miss them. Maybe even tell him how unappreciated you feel when he reacts that way. You were in pain, where was your massages? If he's anything like my previous partner they were no where to be seen!
You deserve to be pampered too you know!
Funny thing is, I started standing up for myself and actually showing anger a few weeks ago. He took it poorly, even though it was a situation where I was clearly in the right and undeserving of his anger. When he's not angry, he's perfectly sweet, and the man I fell for. He's more likely to show this during vacations when he's away from work and family stressors.
Regardless, instead of making excuses, I decided to start questioning his criticisms, attempting to approach things logically. I'm not quite like other girls where I go nuts and throw things at people. I like to sit down and negotiate things through to fix things with the other party.
Regardless, instead of making excuses, I decided to start questioning his criticisms, attempting to approach things logically. I'm not quite like other girls where I go nuts and throw things at people. I like to sit down and negotiate things through to fix things with the other party.
As for the back and leg rubs and other things you may do for him out of love... I remember doing these things for my previous partner. I also told him that I don't like cooking or doing house work and all of that....all of the things woman used to do for their partners I don't like doing but I would to show my love...unless it became expected of me. The minute I felt like what I was doing was expected instead of appreciated I would stop. Because I wasn't doing those things as a job..I was doing them out of love. I would think "Oh he's had a hard day at work, it won't take me much to fold the washing then he can rest for a little longer." As soon as it became expected..."why haven't you folded the washing yet?"...I would stop. Because it wasn't my job. We didn't even live together. It wasn't my stuff.
I think I would react the same to affection. If I were to give my partner massages I would be doing it out of love. I would want him to feel good. I wouldn't be doing it as a job.
So if I were you I would stop for a while. Make him miss them. Maybe even tell him how unappreciated you feel when he reacts that way. You were in pain, where was your massages? If he's anything like my previous partner they were no where to be seen!
You deserve to be pampered too you know!
I agree, it's starting to feel like a job because he always hurts himself somehow by pushing himself too far. I give him back rubs because it calms down the beast. Yesterday, I sudddenly felt like it was expected of me, and I did not like it at all. I am nurturing by nature which is why I never minded it until now.
I can withdraw - I actually have to - as I have hurt my wrist from work... The question is if he will come forward after he's done steaming to talk about things in a civil manner. He rarely apologizes, and he hates 'talks.' However, I hope that if I mean to him as much as he means to me, then he will hopefully put aside his dislike for 'talks.'
This is how you would appeal to a libra though...not sure about a scorp. thoughts?
Nah don't not talk to him. You need to confront him about this and explain to him that you like giving him massages, but lately you've been hurting as well. Maybe you need a massage now. You should also tell him that to get upset about that isn't very mature and he should know that.
If he's a man he will realize he was in the wrong and say he's sorry and trying to be more accomidating next time. At least this is what my scorpio does.
Good luck 🙂
If he's a man he will realize he was in the wrong and say he's sorry and trying to be more accomidating next time. At least this is what my scorpio does.
Good luck 🙂
If someone does something to/for me, and I start taking it for granted or expecting it, and then they take it away...I won't verbalise it but I will miss it and try to get back into their good books again so they will carry on doing whatever it was. So yeah...I won't say sorry and I won't talk about it (unless I've really hurt them) but I will start DOING things as my way of being sorry.
If I'm confronted about it I will get defensive.
I think what happykitsune said is good but if it were me I would wait until he brought it back up again and then explain it the way she's said it. That way he can't get defensive about anything and he has no choice but to take in your feelings as well.
If I'm confronted about it I will get defensive.
I think what happykitsune said is good but if it were me I would wait until he brought it back up again and then explain it the way she's said it. That way he can't get defensive about anything and he has no choice but to take in your feelings as well.
Posted by TypicalScorpio
If someone does something to/for me, and I start taking it for granted or expecting it, and then they take it away...I won't verbalise it but I will miss it and try to get back into their good books again so they will carry on doing whatever it was. So yeah...I won't say sorry and I won't talk about it (unless I've really hurt them) but I will start DOING things as my way of being sorry.
If I'm confronted about it I will get defensive.
I think what happykitsune said is good but if it were me I would wait until he brought it back up again and then explain it the way she's said it. That way he can't get defensive about anything and he has no choice but to take in your feelings as well.
This is exactly like him! Although he never really brings it up until a week or two later, if at all. I might explain myself but all he'll say is 'ok.' Or he'll be silent. Funny thing is, he ends up doing what I ask of him if it was a rational request.
note: I dont know how much his moon sign might have bearing on all this, but he's got cancer pinching away underneath.
His moon is in cancer? So is mine. Maybe that's why he pretends he's not listening but eventually does as you say 🙂
I don't even need to read past the title.
If you feel as if though someone is taking advantage of you/taking you for granted......they probably are. :/
GIRL
to the left, to the left!
If you feel as if though someone is taking advantage of you/taking you for granted......they probably are. :/
GIRL
to the left, to the left!
Posted by brianafay
I don't even need to read past the title.
If you feel as if though someone is taking advantage of you/taking you for granted......they probably are. :/
GIRL
to the left, to the left!
amen sister. i didnt even have to read the post. if it walks like a duck, talks like a duck.....its s duck.
lol@ to the left, to the left
Posted by brianafay
I don't even need to read past the title.
If you feel as if though someone is taking advantage of you/taking you for granted......they probably are. :/
GIRL
to the left, to the left!
Hm, something up with the formatting of my last reply... anyway here it is:
You know, after dating so many men, there's a stage that I always ran away from; the one where we don't know how to resolve our conflicts together. Funny enough it didn't matter how verbal the person was, because even if they were, they could very easily have misinterpreted what I said, or worse yet, lied to me. This one doesn't cheat, nor lie, and actually has a double standard that is to my favour. I.e. When he hurts himself at work it's ok, but if I so much as work extra hours at my desk when I'm catching a cold, he gets all concerned.
If his reaction is a lot like TypicalScorpio's, I don't think he's out to be malicious, and I don't think he actually means to hurt me either. He can be, from time to time, quite selfish, and other times, quite selfless. I can tell that he has an innate insecurity that I'll one day run away, which is very perceptive of him. I would've done that with other men I've dated in the past. This one, however, I avoided the more 'known' path of leaving first, and decided to sit down and negotiate.
What my problem is is trying to figure out how to approach a person with such a different style of dealing with conflicts
what is his mercury sign in?
Posted by DMV
what is his mercury sign in?
I don't know the time of birth, but I guess that doesn't affect the planets?
Sun Scorpio 21.31
Moon Cancer 19.11
Mercury Sagittarius 10.20
Venus Sagittarius 29.40
Mars Capricorn 28.29
Jupiter Capricorn 11.06
Saturn Scorpio 19.22
Uranus Sagittarius 12.28
Neptune Sagittarius 29.46
Pluto Scorpio 2.51
Lilith Aries 7.39
Asc node Taurus 27.28
Posted by ellessque
where is your merc at?
Libra. See below:
Sun Libra 23.11
Moon Aquarius 29.12
Mercury Libra 13.45
Venus Virgo 8.09
Mars Virgo 10.35
Jupiter Sagittarius 9.30
Saturn Scorpio 5.33
Uranus Sagittarius 6.44
Neptune Sagittarius 26.53
Pluto Libra 29.13
Lilith Aquarius 23.48
Asc node Gemini 17.06
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