Scorpio men and deployment.

I don't know what to say except:

It's so hard when your love is deployed
and
I wish I could thank him.

He still loves you. Your intuition is accurate.

If you need to 'spill your heart' to somebody to read without judgement or actually answering - purely listening... I'm here to message. Much of my family and friends are or were military (lets face it - once military, always military). Feel free to without hesitating. It's a complicated and confusing time for the both of you.

Take care of yourself, girl.

Posted by ohfiddlesticks

We were involved before this years ago, but it didn't work out because he wasn't mature enough.

He wasn't mature enough?


Looks like he must be mature enough now, since you've decided that he is good enough for you to work out with you.

And it looks like he is mature enough to be honest with you, and upfront with you and break up with you rather than keep you on a string.


So, now when are YOU going to mature? .... and let the man go because this is what he needs to do?

i ditched my cancerian bf before going into the israeli army (although it was only national service). unless you're in a long term establised relationship or really see your future with the person you're with, it's really the only way. as the date approaches to leave, you analyse all your personal relationships to determine those which you need to carry in your heart and those you don't. it's a harsh process but it's necessary.

especially being a scorpio with all our insecurities and paranoias, particularly after not long into a relationship...it can be all consuming and impairs not only our emotional judgement but our focus generally and that is something that gets you killed in a combat situation.

you have to let him go and not make it harder for him. it's hard being a full time soldier cos you don't know the direction your life is gonna take or even how long you're gonna be around for but that doesn't preclude them from developing feelings for others cos they're human beings. but when you have feelings for someone and they're returned, the other person's happiness hinges on your own wellbeing and that's a huge responsibility for a soldier who has to face the very real possibility of losing their lives.

you just have to take heart that he's doing this because he cares about you. he's not gonna be having a wild time and he will come back (inshallah). often when soldiers come back from active duty, they reassess again the relationships that are important to them and who knows, he may find that he wants to take the responsibility on for your future happiness too 🙂

i know it hurts but it would hurt the same if you were together.

Posted by ohfiddlesticks
I have let him go. I haven't spoken to him since the day we broke up. I know I can't convince him to stay with me, trying to convince him to do something he doesn't want to do is like talking to the Great Wall of China. I have made it known to him I am here for him and if he ever needs anyone to speak to he can speak to me.

I just hate the fact that he is so cold now. He just turned his back on me. I wonder how long he knew about the deployment before he actually decided to tell me?

On the brightside, he hasn't blocked or deleted me on Facebook or Skype.

I have a feeling he is going to talk to me eventually... He always does...

i doubt he knew about his deployment much ahead of him telling you and he's gone cold cos it's easier than saying goodbye for someone you have feelings for.

of course he'll speak to you again but i wouldn't count on it before he comes back. do you know how long his tour is?

P-Angel has valid points there..

Posted by ohfiddlesticks
According to him he is leaving for a year possibly more.

And P-Angel does have a valid point, I have to let him go and it SUCKS! I wish I didn't have to tho.
Everything happens for a reason and I've come to accept that it isn't meant to be, at least not now.

I just really don't understand his logic sometimes, it baffles me. :/

I'm trying to block him out, but it's difficult when he keeps popping up in my thoughts and in my dreams.

aww...of course it's difficult, but you'll get there *hugs* 🙂

Posted by ohfiddlesticks

I just really don't understand his logic sometimes, it baffles me. :/

Why baffling?

You don't actually (get) that he has to tear himself away?

You say you get it, but, then act like it's a decision he's made, rather than a necessity for both of you to be happy. His logic is actually perfectly in-tuned with reality = so long as your emotions are entangled with his, if something happens to him, then your feelings will be shattered. The best thing under this circumstance is to break up, and attempt to regroup yourself while you two are still able to lean on each other.

His logic isn't flawed ... I'm unclear how that is baffling.

Posted by ohfiddlesticks

... is being deployed to Afghanistan in a few weeks ....

... the first time he was deployed ...

Reality check: you knew he was military, in which the possibility of leaving at some point in time was at 100%

I am baffled at your logic = obviously he was going to leave you, why would you let yourself become so attached that you can barely stand it when he left?

Shouldn't logic dictate to you NOT to become emotionally entwined with a soldier?

Posted by P-Angel

Posted by ohfiddlesticks

... is being deployed to Afghanistan in a few weeks ....

... the first time he was deployed ...

Reality check: you knew he was military, in which the possibility of leaving at some point in time was at 100%

I am baffled at your logic = obviously he was going to leave you, why would you let yourself become so attached that you can barely stand it when he left?

Shouldn't logic dictate to you NOT to become emotionally entwined with a soldier?

click to expand

Now now P-Angel you know when it comes to LUV logic goes out the window with common sense.

In this case time will help you through this, don't fight it just spend time with loved ones, focus on school, and do the things you love to do. Excluding FB and any other thing that reminds you of your ex. It's healthy to think of him but you must move on.