I would like to know because this is the third time a bf has justified cheating or wanting to cheat because I am nice. The ex before this even said to a friend "I don't know why I never really loved Bizz, she was so nice to me and really treated me well." All of those who I dated had been cheated on. The Scorpio had been cheated on twice and he took those women back only dumping them when they cheated again, both of them cheating with people he knew. I don't understand what some men want at all and why nice is so bad. I have read books and everything including "Why men love bitches" and the Mars Venus books, but nothing works. I am the person I am, but it seems no men want that and I wonder why.
I do not know if nice is a trait of capricorns or aquariuses, I actually don't know any other than myself.
Men hear this phrase always "he is a nice man, but there is no chemistry between us" or "you are really a nice man, but i am sorry, i feel nothing for you"
Hmm, perhaps, Evan, but in this guys case these drama queens broke his trust several times and made him look like a fool. In the first case, he said he heard the girl told the guy he was cheating on that he (my Scorpio) had a, um, small member. They all worked together and the story spread! My Scorpio said he considered transferring after that.
He says he loves me and that I'm unlike anyone who has ever shown interest in them, that the girls, even the ones he decided not to date, were selfish and gold diggers. But he wanted to cheat on me? I know that cheating doesn't really have an explanation, but it is still weird. I would not think of it except my niceness has been used by my other exes as why they decided to end it with me.
Being nice won't trigger and emotions inside a woman, a hot or even average woman meets nice men always in daily basis and they do the same thing, open the door for her, pull a chair for her to sit. And they are bored wit that. they need a different thing, and here comes me 😉
But I don't want to be a bitch. Like, I am a veterinarian. So many wounded animals are abused and they lash out because of it. You don't gain there trust by yelling or hitting them, that's how they got that way in the first place. You are kind and gentle and they see gradually they can trust you. I do not let animals just bite me or anything, but when they snap or cringe, I understand it's because of there history and I know it takes patience.
I do not know about my other exes but my Scorpio said the repeated cheating broke his spirit, that he considered taking holy orders even or just backpacking in the woods afterward and that he found it hard to trust again. So being a bitch to me seemed counterproductive. Being myself (nice) and showing why I was different seemed the best way.
Hypno, if you are saying you are the type to never pull a chair out for a lady or be nice, then I personally would not be interested. I don't know about men, but a woman likes to be treated like a lady most times. Maybe I am just old-fashioned.
Hypno, no we are not together. He came over, we had it out, he admitted posting the ads and I told him it was over, that's that. I am just pondering.
Elena, first, yes, you are very pretty. 🙂 You have great eyes. Second, we are both early 30s, so not so young. Also, I am not sure how to not be nice. I mean, bitchiness is not something I do well. If I feel I have to be a bitch to someone, I just leave. I don't like the stress. I grew up with a dad who hit me, unfortunately, and an alcoholic mom, so I really dislike stress and drama a lot. I try to get away from it.
"Hypno, if you are saying you are the type to never pull a chair out for a lady or be nice, then I personally would not be interested."
haha, no it's not like that..it was an expression, i do it to my love only. I mean the kind of men who would not dare to say certain things to women cuz they are afraid she would get angry. It's really easy to define, i think you got my point anyway.
not all guys are like this, its the submissive, insecure little pricks. they want head games, manipulation. it feeds them. some guys can't handle a good thing. in which case you tell them to stick it where the sun don't shine and move on.
and yes, scorpios are major drama queens. if there's none, they'll create it.
"Um, about the not saying stuff for fear someone would get mad - can people tell when you are not saying stuff because of that fear?"
All women like to be teased, when i walk with a girl, i start making fun of her all the time..things she says or things she wears..and when i say these things she just open her mouth and raise her eyebrow with an expression that says "OMG, i can't believe you said that"..and they hit me on my hand so i reply with " you love me"..this is small example. While nice men "in their view" won't dare doing such stuff cuz they fear they would lose the girl, and that is boring.
Oh, okay, no I don't bite my tongue about that stuff. He would call women bitches and I would tell him "What the fuck did you just say?" And he would apologize and once a friend called a woman that and he said "Yo, don't call a woman that, she'll cut you," pointing to me. I like being teased 🙂 I like a quick-witted guy and I like to spar verbally, too.
But there have been times I had "let stuff go" because I wasn't sure if it was a legitimate thing or my own insecurities about my past and the guys in them making me think something bad was happening. That's more what I meant by whether people can tell if you are not saying stuff out of fear.
I like a Taurus once in college. He gave me his phone number - this was sort of before cell phones and all. I called up and a woman answered - his fiancee! I only remember he was Taurus because his birthday is a day after one of my best friend's - also a Taurus.
"I like a Taurus once in college. He gave me his phone number - this was sort of before cell phones and all. I called up and a woman answered - his fiancee!"
Hahahaha, your life should be filmed as comedy movie. I bet you have Sag position somewhere in your chart.
Elena, I have tried. It's been hard. I was adopted and my parents are white, so I have dated mainly white guys, and sometimes I feel like some of them had an Asian fetish rather than liking me for the person I am. Like the Scorpio specifying in his ad that he was more attracted to Asian women. I have been to therapy to deal with my upbringing, but never really got to talk much about the men in my life. I am not sure what it is all about. And i don't just like white guys but I am shy and they seem to be the only ones asking me out.
I hate drama. 😢 I think drama is sooo boring! I would love a nice, quiet life with me and my animals, a guy who really loves me and some kids. No scaryness, no guys putting up Internet ads, no weirdness, just something nice and normal. Dysfunction and drama really isn't exotic to me.
Don't worry Elise, it will be fixed with time, everything gonna be ok. I was the shyest person in the world, but now with time, people started to pray to God to make me shy again.
What a laugh. He (the Scorpio) has just texted me that he was sorry and was an asshole and just bored and wants another chance. He asked to get together for drinks. I am turning off my phone.
Ferdy, that is interesting. My youngest brother said something similar, that we all go to what we are used to whether it is good for us or not.
No, elena, it's weird, but when I'm done, I'm done. I get real impatient with my girl friends who give an asshole three or four chances to hurt them. I must be certain, but when I am, I am gone.
I think excitement and drama mean different things to different people. To me, MANUFACTURED drama is very boring and predictable. But something that naturally ebbs and flows is very good. I like relationship to be even-keeled, but I do also like fireworks on occasion, too. I just feel like fireworks are for special occasions. The fireworks at the 4th of July wouldn't be as special to me if I had fireworks every day, you know?
"I think the nice people are from fire and earth signs , the scum of the world usually come from water and air mainly water but air is right up there . Fire and earth band together and wipe out air and water and we shall have peace ."
Kris, you remind me of my rabbit which i don't have.
"I hate drama. I think drama is sooo boring! I would love a nice, quiet life with me and my animals, a guy who really loves me and some kids. No scaryness, no guys putting up Internet ads, no weirdness, just something nice and normal. Dysfunction and drama really isn't exotic to me."
Wow!! Such a nice fantasy!! Wouldn't that be nice—? Too bad that doesn't exist. 😉
Give them a compliment and they shun it, get bored or accuse you of lying.
Tell them they have no ass, are ugly or something insulting and they come to life!"
Ha! Ha! Cs, i think you may be on to something, everytime i give my scorpio bf a compliment he says i'm lying, but when i tell him how rude and insensitive etc he says Nothing! I dont understand this. Who wants to be told negative things just to come alive?? He dont mind hurting my feelings, i'm going to hurt his too.
I do not know if nice is a trait of capricorns or aquariuses, I actually don't know any other than myself.