ally99
@ally99
10 Years
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How to win back the heart of a Taurus man?
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Posted by beautifuldiaster
I'd become Russia. go cold.
Space! Handle you and avoid him at all cost for as long as you can and try to forget him. if you run into him at work, smile like nothing happened and see through him.
I bet it changes him, may take a long time... either way, your actions need to change if he can ever see you as a mate. It has to change because you want them to and not because you think it will make him come back.
:/
Yeah, I was worried someone would say something like that, lol. But I understand. My biggest concern with this type of situation is I'm worried he might think I don't care anymore if I act all non-nonchalant.
ally99,
If you want him back. Don't nag. stay cool. Don't act like a freaked lady. stay cool even if you feel like you want to kill him. Avoid Contacting him. Which already you failed in the first place.
So now, Be firm. Stay strong. That's a Taurus thing when he said ... don't contact him. It should be DON'T.
let me share with you my old story -
My ex taurman and I had a huge argument before - He then said to drop off my stuff in my place. I said I was fine and let me know what time so the messenger I am going to send can pick it up for me and I'm busy at work and no need to see this Sh!!t and nonsense thing - of course letting him know I am not going to chase him- which I didn't. After that he refused so I attacked him in his pad- I have key in his house he gave me key when he was stup!dly in love with me. I didn't talk. I was kind, though my heart was on fire, lol. I got all my stuff out and he helped me to find a taxi because he said he can't drive his car and was tired...there he goes got a taxi for me and before I get inside the taxi - he told me not to contact him anymore. I didn't talked. I listened and put everything in my mind... yeah . 4 days he didn't hear anything from me then He contacted me telling how he missed me and wanted to see me as far as I still have vulnerability after break up and finding my own home - It made my heart grow colder after he swallowed and break his own rules.
yeah, we got back. and yeah he broke up again with me because I failed my duty to him- to touch, to cuddle, to kissed him goodbye before leaving at home, all those stuff made me tired.. and again we got back in his own term of breaking up and making it up. the last thing I did - I broke up with him...done. indeed it's done.
so I hope you know what to do now. It might too hard for you but remember what made him decide he is done with you... so follow his instruction.
If you want him back. Don't nag. stay cool. Don't act like a freaked lady. stay cool even if you feel like you want to kill him. Avoid Contacting him. Which already you failed in the first place.
So now, Be firm. Stay strong. That's a Taurus thing when he said ... don't contact him. It should be DON'T.
let me share with you my old story -
My ex taurman and I had a huge argument before - He then said to drop off my stuff in my place. I said I was fine and let me know what time so the messenger I am going to send can pick it up for me and I'm busy at work and no need to see this Sh!!t and nonsense thing - of course letting him know I am not going to chase him- which I didn't. After that he refused so I attacked him in his pad- I have key in his house he gave me key when he was stup!dly in love with me. I didn't talk. I was kind, though my heart was on fire, lol. I got all my stuff out and he helped me to find a taxi because he said he can't drive his car and was tired...there he goes got a taxi for me and before I get inside the taxi - he told me not to contact him anymore. I didn't talked. I listened and put everything in my mind... yeah . 4 days he didn't hear anything from me then He contacted me telling how he missed me and wanted to see me as far as I still have vulnerability after break up and finding my own home - It made my heart grow colder after he swallowed and break his own rules.
yeah, we got back. and yeah he broke up again with me because I failed my duty to him- to touch, to cuddle, to kissed him goodbye before leaving at home, all those stuff made me tired.. and again we got back in his own term of breaking up and making it up. the last thing I did - I broke up with him...done. indeed it's done.
so I hope you know what to do now. It might too hard for you but remember what made him decide he is done with you... so follow his instruction.
Posted by ShadowAbsorber
Omg!! Maybe I'm unusual for a Taurus, but I'm less cold. I respond to emotional warmth and clinginess. I like your impatience, I think it's sweet. But you have to be intuitive about when to STOP when a Taurus needs to be respected when they say stop. God, this is so hard??_ I would have sent another text right away explaining that you sent that text the exact same time that he did and that you would then leave him alone according to what he said, and then sincerely left him alone. But now, it's too late. Any additional text is going to pile on and piss him off. Trust me, when a Taurus draws a line AND YOU FEEL THAT THAT IS THE LINE - DO NOT CROSS IT
You will be deleted.
...I did exactly that. I freaked out. I didn't think he would think that I sent that text after he told me to stop...I didn't see it in time...it was all a giant mistake. But once he told me he was done. I said "I'm sorry for my text, I was just apologizing, you won't hear from me again."
But is there ANY hope of making up? I know I pushed too hard too quickly, but I sincerely do care about him and blowing him off isn't how I work.
Posted by M143
ally99,
If you want him back. Don't nag. stay cool. Don't act like a freaked lady. stay cool even if you feel like you want to kill him. Avoid Contacting him. Which already you failed in the first place.
So now, Be firm. Stay strong. That's a Taurus thing when he said ... don't contact him. It should be DON'T.
let me share with you my old story -
My ex taurman and I had a huge argument before - He then said to drop off my stuff in my place. I said I was fine and let me know what time so the messenger I am going to send can pick it up for me and I'm busy at work and no need to see this Sh!!t and nonsense thing - of course letting him know I am not going to chase him- which I didn't. After that he refused so I attacked him in his pad- I have key in his house he gave me key when he was stup!dly in love with me. I didn't talk. I was kind, though my heart was on fire, lol. I got all my stuff out and he helped me to find a taxi because he said he can't drive his car and was tired...there he goes got a taxi for me and before I get inside the taxi - he told me not to contact him anymore. I didn't talked. I listened and put everything in my mind... yeah . 4 days he didn't hear anything from me then He contacted me telling how he missed me and wanted to see me as far as I still have vulnerability after break up and finding my own home - It made my heart grow colder after he swallowed and break his own rules.
yeah, we got back. and yeah he broke up again with me because I failed my duty to him- to touch, to cuddle, to kissed him goodbye before leaving at home, all those stuff made me tired.. and again we got back in his own term of breaking up and making it up. the last thing I did - I broke up with him...done. indeed it's done.
so I hope you know what to do now. It might too hard for you but remember what made him decide he is done with you... so follow his instruction.
I feel like my constant need to hear from him - I made phone calls and texts. All of them were apologetic for my actions. he told me I was harrassinb him...which scares me the most. I was in hysterics. I blew my chance of talking to him by sending a text the same time he told me to not contact him..and I sent another explaining what just happened and I will leave him alone.
I think I blew ALL of my chances. I have stuff of his and he has thinbs of mine...I don't know what
Posted by ShadowAbsorber
Yes, there is hope!! My advice is this.. Do you have social media accounts that he sees? DON'T CONTACT HIM.. this will show that you respect him. But wherever and whenever you can, pour your heart out on other social media accounts so that he knows you still care, don't speak directly to him but maybe talk about your mood being low, that you miss somebody, give him signals??_ this will make his heart melt. (I hope!) Deep down, Taurans are emotional and they want to know the other person is as emotional as they are. They're sweeties deep down. They want to know you care.
Oddly enough, he's not on any social media..the next time I see him is on Monday. I don't know if I should call him before heading into work to at least see/make sure that we're on speaking terms? Or if I should go in and see what happens?
I've been an absolute mess without him. And I'm afraid I've pushed him so far that he just doesn't care anymore..
No, I won't be contacting him anytime soon. It just happened 2 days ago. But his birthday is next week too...I don't know whether or not to do or say anything then either...
Posted by ally99
I feel like my constant need to hear from him - I made phone calls and texts. All of them were apologetic for my actions. he told me I was harrassinb him...which scares me the most. I was in hysterics. I blew my chance of talking to him by sending a text the same time he told me to not contact him..and I sent another explaining what just happened and I will leave him alone.
I think I blew ALL of my chances. I have stuff of his and he has thinbs of mine...I don't know whatclick to expand
That is why he's done. Don't be afraid. You will be fine soon. Just stop explaining yourself - this sounds proving and it needs validation from him but you are going failed that again...
Posted by M143Posted by ally99
I feel like my constant need to hear from him - I made phone calls and texts. All of them were apologetic for my actions. he told me I was harrassinb him...which scares me the most. I was in hysterics. I blew my chance of talking to him by sending a text the same time he told me to not contact him..and I sent another explaining what just happened and I will leave him alone.
I think I blew ALL of my chances. I have stuff of his and he has thinbs of mine...I don't know what
That is why he's done. Don't be afraid. You will be fine soon. Just stop explaining yourself - this sounds proving and it needs validation from him but you are going failed that again...click to expand
I am done trying to contact him. he is difficult because in past arguments, sometimes he wants his space, and truly wants it, other times he's gotten upset if I left him alone for a few days, sometimes he wants affection. This time was so different I can't even explain it. he didn't talk to me like he was angry - no cussing...he was stern and serious. I just hope one day we will be OKAY. Just civil...and I hope he doesn't hate me..
And thank you all for your feedback. If anyone else wants to chime in, please don't hesitate.
Posted by eagleinfire5
The girl I'm talking about is a Taurus. she's always busy studying but took time to message me between her readings. I would send messages to her throughout the day, everyday. she wouldn't reply coz she was busy with school and when she wasn't in school she was busy studying. one night I sent a ton of messages to her and when she didn't reply, I called her. there was nothing urgent that I needed to say, I was just being clingy.
she was annoyed at me so she sent me a message telling me to delete her number.
looking back, I can see where I messed up. I was being impatient and clingy, that ultimately drove her away. with a Taurus you have to take things slow but my Venus in Scorpio doesn't know any better. lesson learned.
But this person I've been with for almost 5 years..how was it SO easy to get rid of me?
He hasn't got rid of you. He's just asked you for space. He asked you for space because of your behaviour which obviously got too much for him.
Even I feel anxious from reading your posts and I'm used to intensity as I'm Scorp Sun and Venus.
Follow the advice from the Taurus and take on board all the other comments. Explore this forum for stories similar to yours. There's plenty of them.
It's not all about you, it's about him too. This reminds me of a situation I had years back where the guy wouldn't give me space. I felt suffocated and he wasn't even in my country! I cut him off, badly. It had reached the point of no return. It hurt me too but it was best for me.
Don't push it. Just relax.
Even I feel anxious from reading your posts and I'm used to intensity as I'm Scorp Sun and Venus.
Follow the advice from the Taurus and take on board all the other comments. Explore this forum for stories similar to yours. There's plenty of them.
It's not all about you, it's about him too. This reminds me of a situation I had years back where the guy wouldn't give me space. I felt suffocated and he wasn't even in my country! I cut him off, badly. It had reached the point of no return. It hurt me too but it was best for me.
Don't push it. Just relax.
Posted by AgentP911
He hasn't got rid of you. He's just asked you for space. He asked you for space because of your behaviour which obviously got too much for him.
Even I feel anxious from reading your posts and I'm used to intensity as I'm Scorp Sun and Venus.
Follow the advice from the Taurus and take on board all the other comments. Explore this forum for stories similar to yours. There's plenty of them.
It's not all about you, it's about him too. This reminds me of a situation I had years back where the guy wouldn't give me space. I felt suffocated and he wasn't even in my country! I cut him off, badly. It had reached the point of no return. It hurt me too but it was best for me.
Don't push it. Just relax.
he told me he was done though...doesn't that mean more than just "wanting space"?
Posted by ShadowAbsorber
If you call him, deep down he'll feel a mixture of affection and annoyance. I'm not sure which one is more strong for him depending on how bad you annoyed him. It might be best not to call him, he seems really heated right now.
Let me help ya...
Annoyance will win. Point blank.
@OP
Back off immediately. You are pushing for hell on earth. Leave him and go on with your life. You have already show serious instability and no self respect or common courtesy. If you tread one step beyond the limit already set you are going to have to deal with the coldest and hardest bull you have ever met. He is either going to pit you down and destroy you or vanish entirely, yes like the type where you will never ever see, hear or find him again, and destroy you.
You really need to work on your self now. You do come across as very insecure and have a tendancy towards harassment and stalking. This is not healthy at all.
After calming your self down, go on with your life, please don't do any of this with the intent of getting him back cause it won't happen unless he decides this which currently I doubt will happen.
Move on.
Give him space. I'm a leo and love attention but what you're doing would be too much for me too.
Posted by OmagaIIIPosted by ShadowAbsorber
If you call him, deep down he'll feel a mixture of affection and annoyance. I'm not sure which one is more strong for him depending on how bad you annoyed him. It might be best not to call him, he seems really heated right now.
Let me help ya...
Annoyance will win. Point blank.
@OP
Back off immediately. You are pushing for hell on earth. Leave him and go on with your life. You have already show serious instability and no self respect or common courtesy. If you tread one step beyond the limit already set you are going to have to deal with the coldest and hardest bull you have ever met. He is either going to pit you down and destroy you or vanish entirely, yes like the type where you will never ever see, hear or find him again, and destroy you.
You really need to work on your self now. You do come across as very insecure and have a tendancy towards harassment and stalking. This is not healthy at all.
After calming your self down, go on with your life, please don't do any of this with the intent of getting him back cause it won't happen unless he decides this which currently I doubt will happen.
Move on.click to expand
Lovely.
Posted by evalani290
"But this person I've been with for almost 5 years..how was it SO easy to get rid of me?"
Well let's see...stalking him,calling him,texting him after he told you to back off and then texting him again to say sorry for texting him?
Yes,i think that was actually very easy for him,with some help from you.
Stalking him? I know calling & textinb countless amount of times, but I didn't know he wanted his space until he texted me the same time I texted him.
I know guys. I know to stay away. I wish he had told me sooner because like I said before, sometimes he wants his space, other times he wants my attention, and he refused to tell me what he wanted until I just broke down..
I did too much. I wish there was a way coming back from it. I will never forgive myself for doing what I did.
I did too much. I wish there was a way coming back from it. I will never forgive myself for doing what I did.
Posted by ally99Posted by AgentP911
He hasn't got rid of you. He's just asked you for space. He asked you for space because of your behaviour which obviously got too much for him.
Even I feel anxious from reading your posts and I'm used to intensity as I'm Scorp Sun and Venus.
Follow the advice from the Taurus and take on board all the other comments. Explore this forum for stories similar to yours. There's plenty of them.
It's not all about you, it's about him too. This reminds me of a situation I had years back where the guy wouldn't give me space. I felt suffocated and he wasn't even in my country! I cut him off, badly. It had reached the point of no return. It hurt me too but it was best for me.
Don't push it. Just relax.
he told me he was done though...doesn't that mean more than just "wanting space"?click to expand
It's a tricky one, give him ton of space and show him that you still care in person. Smile. Be happy but not too happy. But remmebe space space space. Maybe give it 2 weeks and send him an email , not nagging for a conversation but an email with apologies. As for me I really need to know that whatvee that happened is lesrnt through past mistakes .... I have Aqua moon and venus in Gemini so any kind of excessive phone calls and text messages kill me and turn me off really badly.... I been dating a Scorpio venus sag guy for a year now and i think I can count how many times we call each other.. I think it's about 10 if not lol....... We just don't like phone calls personally I hate it. Gemini sun is too much for me..... they like to chat n chat n chat not really getting the point. I'm also to blame for that as I have a bad habit of doing so but " don't go back to him " unless you have tried to change your behaviour and why it pissed him off so much in the first place.... it's not about getting him bak to talk to u, but I think it's about going bak but seeing a different result u noe.... _??_ all the best
Posted by saweetz1988Posted by ally99Posted by AgentP911
He hasn't got rid of you. He's just asked you for space. He asked you for space because of your behaviour which obviously got too much for him.
Even I feel anxious from reading your posts and I'm used to intensity as I'm Scorp Sun and Venus.
Follow the advice from the Taurus and take on board all the other comments. Explore this forum for stories similar to yours. There's plenty of them.
It's not all about you, it's about him too. This reminds me of a situation I had years back where the guy wouldn't give me space. I felt suffocated and he wasn't even in my country! I cut him off, badly. It had reached the point of no return. It hurt me too but it was best for me.
Don't push it. Just relax.
he told me he was done though...doesn't that mean more than just "wanting space"?
It's a tricky one, give him ton of space and show him that you still care in person. Smile. Be happy but not too happy. But remmebe space space space. Maybe give it 2 weeks and send him an email , not nagging for a conversation but an email with apologies. As for me I really need to know that whatvee that happened is lesrnt through past mistakes .... I have Aqua moon and venus in Gemini so any kind of excessive phone calls and text messages kill me and turn me off really badly.... I been dating a Scorpio venus sag guy for a year now and i think I can count how many times we call each other.. I think it's about 10 if not lol....... We just don't like phone calls personally I hate it. Gemini sun is too much for me..... they like to chat n chat n chat not really getting the point. I'm also to blame for that as I have a bad habit of doing so but " don't go back to him " unless you have tried to change your behaviour and why it pissed him off so much in the first place.... it's not about getting him bak to talk to u, but I think it's about going bak but seeing a different result u noe.... _??_ all the bestclick to expand
his birthday is next friday. I'm afraid if I send him a happy birthday text even, it will push him over the edge. I don't want him to hate me...I'm so afraid of that.
Posted by evalani290Posted by ally99
I know guys. I know to stay away. I wish he had told me sooner because like I said before, sometimes he wants his space, other times he wants my attention, and he refused to tell me what he wanted until I just broke down..
I did too much. I wish there was a way coming back from it. I will never forgive myself for doing what I did.
He refused to tell you because you pushed him,he did the opposite.
It's not just sun signs here,you being a Gemini,him being a Taurus,it's common sense Ally. Not everyone thinks like you or approach situations like you do.
Communication doesn't mean text and calling when the other person doesn't feel to communicate with you.
You put yourself in the position where you won't get an answer and no one will listen when you'll talk,whoever that person may be.
Backing off doesn't mean that you give up on him,in this case it's the mature thing to do,for both of you.
click to expand
I'm trying to give him the respect he deserves by not contacting him in any way. But for our work, we literally have to work together, talk, etc. I don't know where to separate professionalism and our relationship in that sense. Do I show no emotion? Do I keep my distance from him as much as possible? I'm trying to do every little thing so he doesn't hate my existence...which is what I'm feeling right now.
Jello Pudding!
He said no contact. Give him what he wants. No contact. Birthday or not, he said no contact. He didn't say no contact except for on my birthday.
He's probably not even thinking much about his birthday and clearly it's got to such a detrimental point between you two that it's come to no contact.
I'm not Taurus so perhaps follow the Taurus advice on here.
As much as you might think it's nice to wish him a happy birthday, he may, or may not appreciate it.
On the other hand, perhaps posting him a card would be suffice to show he's still important to you and you're thinking of him but a card doesn't warrant a response as such like a text or call might plus I'm sure he'll receive cards from others too.
I'm not sure on this but it seems it might be an acceptable move.
He's probably not even thinking much about his birthday and clearly it's got to such a detrimental point between you two that it's come to no contact.
I'm not Taurus so perhaps follow the Taurus advice on here.
As much as you might think it's nice to wish him a happy birthday, he may, or may not appreciate it.
On the other hand, perhaps posting him a card would be suffice to show he's still important to you and you're thinking of him but a card doesn't warrant a response as such like a text or call might plus I'm sure he'll receive cards from others too.
I'm not sure on this but it seems it might be an acceptable move.
Also....how do I go about getting my things from him?
Posted by AgentP911
He said no contact. Give him what he wants. No contact. Birthday or not, he said no contact. He didn't say no contact except for on my birthday.
He's probably not even thinking much about his birthday and clearly it's got to such a detrimental point between you two that it's come to no contact.
I'm not Taurus so perhaps follow the Taurus advice on here.
As much as you might think it's nice to wish him a happy birthday, he may, or may not appreciate it.
On the other hand, perhaps posting him a card would be suffice to show he's still important to you and you're thinking of him but a card doesn't warrant a response as such like a text or call might plus I'm sure he'll receive cards from others too.
I'm not sure on this but it seems it might be an acceptable move.
Yeah, I guess I'll just have to see where we stand in a week to see if it's even appropriate for me to do that.
*** rolls eyes at the getting my stuff back remark ***
@OP
Listen to AgentP911.
No contact means no contact. Also, I am pretty sure he has been retreating away from you for some time now, but again you failed to see this. The only time we go full on rogue, man you must have messed up then.
Now I really don't mean to be mean 😛 but you have something else going on here and even I can feel it, and to be frank, as a Taurus male myself, it is really a passion killer, and that is that everything is just about you the whole time. Sorry but you are seriously vining this off and that is most likely what pushed him away (or started the process) anyway.
Now I might be wrong, but we pick stuff like that IP a mile away, in my case more like 9000 miles away, but still.
Also, you said you have been together 5 years... Yeah, well uhmm... Don't think so. We don't do this after 5 years in a committed relationship. Don't get me wrong, people part all the time but this feels way to platonic.
Maybe friends for 5 years, while has been waiting for you to calm the fuck down, but nothing more. Give us a bit of 5 year history that proves otherwise cause with a Taurus everything takes time. Your situation started a long-ass time ago.
Listen to AgentP911.
No contact means no contact. Also, I am pretty sure he has been retreating away from you for some time now, but again you failed to see this. The only time we go full on rogue, man you must have messed up then.
Now I really don't mean to be mean 😛 but you have something else going on here and even I can feel it, and to be frank, as a Taurus male myself, it is really a passion killer, and that is that everything is just about you the whole time. Sorry but you are seriously vining this off and that is most likely what pushed him away (or started the process) anyway.
Now I might be wrong, but we pick stuff like that IP a mile away, in my case more like 9000 miles away, but still.
Also, you said you have been together 5 years... Yeah, well uhmm... Don't think so. We don't do this after 5 years in a committed relationship. Don't get me wrong, people part all the time but this feels way to platonic.
Maybe friends for 5 years, while has been waiting for you to calm the fuck down, but nothing more. Give us a bit of 5 year history that proves otherwise cause with a Taurus everything takes time. Your situation started a long-ass time ago.
Lol I'm soooooo not a relationship guru!!!
I did do a lot of reading up on Taurus on here and books/internet plus had some very useful message exchanges on here with Taurus to try and understand them better. I learnt a lot. I didn't learn everything and I still don't 'get' a lot of it as we are so different but also so similar too.
I think it helps to just stop, as in OP needs to just stop everything and take a look at herself and everything around her so she gets the bigger picture of what's happening here.
I think she's focusing too much on herself and also the smaller things that really aren't important such as getting her things back and whether to wish him a happy birthday.
Omaga is probably correct in saying this isn't just a sudden thing. Regardless of astrology, it's rare that someone will just cut off another person just like that.
From how OP has been with this thread it's likely it has been building for sometime but it's gone unnoticed.
I don't feel the advice she is receiving is being heard. There is good advice from all here. We cannot ALL be wrong, can we?
It takes much trust and faith, not just to ask for advice on here but to actually really listen to it AND to put it into action. However, sometimes it is what is needed as things have clearly got to the point where OP is reaching out for help as everything OP has done or is doing is simply not working. A fresh look and a better understanding is to be gained here by the OP. That is, if OP wants to and is genuinely interested in her Taurus man and their future.
I did do a lot of reading up on Taurus on here and books/internet plus had some very useful message exchanges on here with Taurus to try and understand them better. I learnt a lot. I didn't learn everything and I still don't 'get' a lot of it as we are so different but also so similar too.
I think it helps to just stop, as in OP needs to just stop everything and take a look at herself and everything around her so she gets the bigger picture of what's happening here.
I think she's focusing too much on herself and also the smaller things that really aren't important such as getting her things back and whether to wish him a happy birthday.
Omaga is probably correct in saying this isn't just a sudden thing. Regardless of astrology, it's rare that someone will just cut off another person just like that.
From how OP has been with this thread it's likely it has been building for sometime but it's gone unnoticed.
I don't feel the advice she is receiving is being heard. There is good advice from all here. We cannot ALL be wrong, can we?
It takes much trust and faith, not just to ask for advice on here but to actually really listen to it AND to put it into action. However, sometimes it is what is needed as things have clearly got to the point where OP is reaching out for help as everything OP has done or is doing is simply not working. A fresh look and a better understanding is to be gained here by the OP. That is, if OP wants to and is genuinely interested in her Taurus man and their future.
Posted by OmagaIIIPosted by AgentP911
*** rolls eyes at the getting my stuff back remark ***
Whahaha, nailed it 😛click to expand
I did actually roll my eyes!!
Well AgentP911, you'r doing damn well as a guru 😛
And you have actually picked up, whether by research or intuition, something very specific about Taurus and your last post made that very clear.
Taurus can keep pace with anything and everything and yes, we might be slow with relationships but at the same time we do show our emotions in everything we say and do but no one listens, ever, till it is way to late unless...
You stop.
Literally stop, stop what you are doing, thinking, feel etc. Just stop and listen. Anywhere, anytime. Words spoken eco in all of us so this really can happen everywhere and anytime. You see, with our nature I believe we can shift in and out of this world by looking at the bigger picture but also at the minute details.
We stop, assess what is going on, calmly decide what is next, zone back in and go on with no fuss. And this happens with everything. So you are on track Agent, spot on.
If a person has learned this directly from a Taurus and can apply this then your life becomes magical. Pretty sure those with taurean SO's will tell you that when you can do this you know what the other is thinking and feeling and this brings a deep bond, a deep love and a deep understanding. Like we share this world and 'our' world. Absolutely blissful and harmonious. We each experience it slightly differently, but if you have experienced it as we do, then we make sense.
Now if OP gives us background I'll tell you straight up where this situation began with a break in this harmony or pure or blatent lack of understanding or willingness to learn and let go.
And you have actually picked up, whether by research or intuition, something very specific about Taurus and your last post made that very clear.
Taurus can keep pace with anything and everything and yes, we might be slow with relationships but at the same time we do show our emotions in everything we say and do but no one listens, ever, till it is way to late unless...
You stop.
Literally stop, stop what you are doing, thinking, feel etc. Just stop and listen. Anywhere, anytime. Words spoken eco in all of us so this really can happen everywhere and anytime. You see, with our nature I believe we can shift in and out of this world by looking at the bigger picture but also at the minute details.
We stop, assess what is going on, calmly decide what is next, zone back in and go on with no fuss. And this happens with everything. So you are on track Agent, spot on.
If a person has learned this directly from a Taurus and can apply this then your life becomes magical. Pretty sure those with taurean SO's will tell you that when you can do this you know what the other is thinking and feeling and this brings a deep bond, a deep love and a deep understanding. Like we share this world and 'our' world. Absolutely blissful and harmonious. We each experience it slightly differently, but if you have experienced it as we do, then we make sense.
Now if OP gives us background I'll tell you straight up where this situation began with a break in this harmony or pure or blatent lack of understanding or willingness to learn and let go.
Awwww gold star for AgentP911!! ?_—?
i'm going to needlessly echo the last few sentiments and say you need to stop. stop thinking, stop acting, stop re-acting...and you're absolutely minimising the situation.
it didn't start with sending the text at the same time. you admitted it yourself that when he said that he would speak to you later after you approached him in the parking lot by the time you reached the inside of your car you were calling him. where is your respect? are your feelings so much more important than his? he wanted something from you and you refused it point blank. it was selfish and that this has been going on for years (and this thread) leads me to believe that you don't get it.
don't try and change yourself, it won't work. i say cut your losses, accept who you are and move on. hopefully with the next person you will learn to respect their wishes and feelings without bulldozing in with your own.
it didn't start with sending the text at the same time. you admitted it yourself that when he said that he would speak to you later after you approached him in the parking lot by the time you reached the inside of your car you were calling him. where is your respect? are your feelings so much more important than his? he wanted something from you and you refused it point blank. it was selfish and that this has been going on for years (and this thread) leads me to believe that you don't get it.
don't try and change yourself, it won't work. i say cut your losses, accept who you are and move on. hopefully with the next person you will learn to respect their wishes and feelings without bulldozing in with your own.
And my feelings aren't to be respected as well as his?
Of course I care about his feelings. All I want is for him to be happy, me in the picture or not; he knows this. You all can stop saying that I was the one who screwed up. I get this. I understand. And yes I am going to look at the minute details of getting my things back because there are clothes, pictures, furniture, etc. at his place. And yes I am going to think about his birthday because I've been planning it for the past month.
I will never accept "who I am" because what I did to him was unbearable, and I pushed the person I love most away because of my hot-headed actions. I was too focused on getting an answer. I was impatient. I wasn't thinking of the consequences or his hidden messages.
No, I do not need to explain or "prove" our relationship. Everyone works differently. We have experiences A LOT together. And when I say a lot, I mean a lot...but the downfall of our relationship happened just a few weeks ago, but it all ended in one night. No explanation other than he wants space.
You can't blame me for being heartbroken. For wondering these things and to be asking a lot of questions that I'll never get answers to. 7 years of my life has been spent with this man, 5 years on a romantic level. It is extremely difficult to just come out of it and look at life as a positive thing because after 5 years with someone, your lives intertwine so deeply that it's hard to look at your own life without him being involved.
I came to this forum for advice because with what I do know about Taurus', he fits every description. he has always been difficult to figure out, so I thought maybe I could get some insight on how he is possibly feeling and thinking - not to be ridiculed for my immature and inappropriate actions.
Of course I care about his feelings. All I want is for him to be happy, me in the picture or not; he knows this. You all can stop saying that I was the one who screwed up. I get this. I understand. And yes I am going to look at the minute details of getting my things back because there are clothes, pictures, furniture, etc. at his place. And yes I am going to think about his birthday because I've been planning it for the past month.
I will never accept "who I am" because what I did to him was unbearable, and I pushed the person I love most away because of my hot-headed actions. I was too focused on getting an answer. I was impatient. I wasn't thinking of the consequences or his hidden messages.
No, I do not need to explain or "prove" our relationship. Everyone works differently. We have experiences A LOT together. And when I say a lot, I mean a lot...but the downfall of our relationship happened just a few weeks ago, but it all ended in one night. No explanation other than he wants space.
You can't blame me for being heartbroken. For wondering these things and to be asking a lot of questions that I'll never get answers to. 7 years of my life has been spent with this man, 5 years on a romantic level. It is extremely difficult to just come out of it and look at life as a positive thing because after 5 years with someone, your lives intertwine so deeply that it's hard to look at your own life without him being involved.
I came to this forum for advice because with what I do know about Taurus', he fits every description. he has always been difficult to figure out, so I thought maybe I could get some insight on how he is possibly feeling and thinking - not to be ridiculed for my immature and inappropriate actions.
sometimes our partners feelings have to come before ours, yes.
and what is wrong with accepting yourself? you are who you are. sometimes people just aren't compatible. find someone who is your match.
you said yourself it was a tumultuous 5 years. to the point where you had periods (at least one) apart. it's a hard argument to suggest continuing trying to push water uphill. so you'll get over this spat and then? will you stop being intense? will you suddenly embrace passivity? you'll succeed for a while until the next time and then? one of the poorest reasons for staying in a relationship is because i have already invested x amount of time.
and what is wrong with accepting yourself? you are who you are. sometimes people just aren't compatible. find someone who is your match.
you said yourself it was a tumultuous 5 years. to the point where you had periods (at least one) apart. it's a hard argument to suggest continuing trying to push water uphill. so you'll get over this spat and then? will you stop being intense? will you suddenly embrace passivity? you'll succeed for a while until the next time and then? one of the poorest reasons for staying in a relationship is because i have already invested x amount of time.
It's more than that. It was our plans for the future, our families loving each other, sharing a common passion and working on it together, getting pregnant and losing the baby, mutual friends, coworkers, traveling the world, sharing and creating traditions...and it's all over.
Posted by ally99
It's more than that. It was our plans for the future, our families loving each other, sharing a common passion and working on it together, getting pregnant and losing the baby, mutual friends, coworkers, traveling the world, sharing and creating traditions...and it's all over.
funny, you didn't mention a thing about him.
Posted by jeanePosted by ally99
It's more than that. It was our plans for the future, our families loving each other, sharing a common passion and working on it together, getting pregnant and losing the baby, mutual friends, coworkers, traveling the world, sharing and creating traditions...and it's all over.
funny, you didn't mention a thing about him.click to expand
how did I not?
One of the main differences between the two Mercury ruled signs...you Gems & us Virgos...is "PATIENCE". The former never being able to apply it at the right moment in dire situations (which this definitely is one of them) and the latter being able to do it so well they sometimes forget what the heck they were being "patient" for to begin with and move on regardless...lol!
Ally dear...you're going to have to exercise "patience" relentlessly at this moment. I get that you got alot invested, however, ALL relationships are a GAMBLE and in a lighter sense...as us Statisticians like to say..."a game of chance". No one is "guaranteed" to another or is the "property" of another person. Others in relationships have invested & had to give up alot more and still have come out of worse situations, maybe a bit hurt, but ok overall. And I can tell you now from years of dealing with Taurus men....when they say "enough is enough" = "don't call"...they mean it! If the things you have at his place are not life & death things you absolutely MUST have to get thru your daily job....leave it for now and maybe for the next few weeks. Oh and the bday wish thing....let that one go! You can always wish him a happy belated one...he'll understand things were rough between u 2 during his bday...he's a Taurus...they're understanding. Or you can wish him a happy bday next year same time...either way...now is definitely NOT the time to be "subconsciously" or "consciously" coming up with excuses to be in his presence just to get him to talk. Be very careful what you ask for because with a BULL...you just may get it!
Ally dear...you're going to have to exercise "patience" relentlessly at this moment. I get that you got alot invested, however, ALL relationships are a GAMBLE and in a lighter sense...as us Statisticians like to say..."a game of chance". No one is "guaranteed" to another or is the "property" of another person. Others in relationships have invested & had to give up alot more and still have come out of worse situations, maybe a bit hurt, but ok overall. And I can tell you now from years of dealing with Taurus men....when they say "enough is enough" = "don't call"...they mean it! If the things you have at his place are not life & death things you absolutely MUST have to get thru your daily job....leave it for now and maybe for the next few weeks. Oh and the bday wish thing....let that one go! You can always wish him a happy belated one...he'll understand things were rough between u 2 during his bday...he's a Taurus...they're understanding. Or you can wish him a happy bday next year same time...either way...now is definitely NOT the time to be "subconsciously" or "consciously" coming up with excuses to be in his presence just to get him to talk. Be very careful what you ask for because with a BULL...you just may get it!
Posted by Lovelyisis
One of the main differences between the two Mercury ruled signs...you Gems & us Virgos...is "PATIENCE". The former never being able to apply it at the right moment in dire situations (which this definitely is one of them) and the latter being able to do it so well they sometimes forget what the heck they were being "patient" for to begin with and move on regardless...lol!
Ally dear...you're going to have to exercise "patience" relentlessly at this moment. I get that you got alot invested, however, ALL relationships are a GAMBLE and in a lighter sense...as us Statisticians like to say..."a game of chance". No one is "guaranteed" to another or is the "property" of another person. Others in relationships have invested & had to give up alot more and still have come out of worse situations, maybe a bit hurt, but ok overall. And I can tell you now from years of dealing with Taurus men....when they say "enough is enough" = "don't call"...they mean it! If the things you have at his place are not life & death things you absolutely MUST have to get thru your daily job....leave it for now and maybe for the next few weeks. Oh and the bday wish thing....let that one go! You can always wish him a happy belated one...he'll understand things were rough between u 2 during his bday...he's a Taurus...they're understanding. Or you can wish him a happy bday next year same time...either way...now is definitely NOT the time to be "subconsciously" or "consciously" coming up with excuses to be in his presence just to get him to talk. Be very careful what you ask for because with a BULL...you just may get it!
Thank you for this.
And yes, I definitely need to work on my patience. It's hard for me to grasp that there are people, like my ex, who work better by NOT focusing on the problem and fixing it then and there. Because for me, if there's tension, I want it bone by talking it out. But I know that's not how everyone works...but, I was impatient.
Ur welcome Ally...not here to beat up on u...u've gotten enough of that on here...lol! (sorry force of habit to laugh...love doing it cuz its food for the soul!). But even the ones who may "appear" to be a bit rougher in their thoughts on ur topic...mean well I would like to believe. Yes us Gems & Virgos love to "talk things out", however, TIMING IS EVERYTHING and right now is NOT the time for talk between you two. Your Taurus needs space & time to "breath" and just "be"...trust me, it's important to him...and what's important to him should be important to you if u truly care about him like u say u do. Try looking at it another way...whatever it is ur feeling about all of it right now...embrace those feelings...reflect on those feelings...and most of all enjoy those feelings...good ones & bad ones. Its a part of life...and be thankful that if nothing else...ur still living it hun! 🙂
And if u still feel the need to talk about it more afterwards...that's what our bff's and sisters and closest female friends are there for! Oh...and also the dxp community quacks...such as myself...lol! Be well Ally!
ally99,
ah your stuff..
Give 1 week or 2 weeks. After that - send a msg to him without emotional attachment Let him know you are getting
your stuff.. if he will respond to your msg that's a good sign.
My ex taurman had a big luggage bag he didn't bring back with him when I took all my stuff out from his pad until 4 months. During the day he sent me home I forced him to bring it with him 'cause I don't have time anymore. I was busy.. which he said *some other time,M* and it goes 4 months. I contacted him to get his luggage bag. He replied and was excited.. he had lots of questions which I don't bother answering them 1 by 1. My intention was to give his luggage because I know he kept moving his a $ $ in different country. So I'm thinking he needs it and it's not mine - so I don't keep what's not mine..other than throwing it.
The day he respond my email - I told him to set his time. He said if I can bring it to him somewhere.
I said I was fine and let me know the exact address and here's my messenger name..
Gosh, that moment he saw me - really I knew how he felt. Heavy and wanted to hug me. He smiled and looks to me
sadly...it was like telling me - M, put your ego down.
I don't look back where I stumble - people use your weakness as weapon against you. Though my heart was heavy that day. I always think about myself.. Stop M. Stop!
you will be fine soon. don't give in. leave for good.
I hope you know what to do now.. be careful how you deliver the msg. keep it light. no other intention.
Good luck. Focus to yourself now.
Posted by Lovelyisis
Ur welcome Ally...not here to beat up on u...u've gotten enough of that on here...lol! (sorry force of habit to laugh...love doing it cuz its food for the soul!). But even the ones who may "appear" to be a bit rougher in their thoughts on ur topic...mean well I would like to believe. Yes us Gems & Virgos love to "talk things out", however, TIMING IS EVERYTHING and right now is NOT the time for talk between you two. Your Taurus needs space & time to "breath" and just "be"...trust me, it's important to him...and what's important to him should be important to you if u truly care about him like u say u do. Try looking at it another way...whatever it is ur feeling about all of it right now...embrace those feelings...reflect on those feelings...and most of all enjoy those feelings...good ones & bad ones. Its a part of life...and be thankful that if nothing else...ur still living it hun! 🙂
And if u still feel the need to talk about it more afterwards...that's what our bff's and sisters and closest female friends are there for! Oh...and also the dxp community quacks...such as myself...lol! Be well Ally!
Thank you again.
Posted by M143
ally99,
ah your stuff..
Give 1 week or 2 weeks. After that - send a msg to him without emotional attachment Let him know you are getting
your stuff.. if he will respond to your msg that's a good sign.
My ex taurman had a big luggage bag he didn't bring back with him when I took all my stuff out from his pad until 4 months. During the day he sent me home I forced him to bring it with him 'cause I don't have time anymore. I was busy.. which he said *some other time,M* and it goes 4 months. I contacted him to get his luggage bag. He replied and was excited.. he had lots of questions which I don't bother answering them 1 by 1. My intention was to give his luggage because I know he kept moving his a $ $ in different country. So I'm thinking he needs it and it's not mine - so I don't keep what's not mine..other than throwing it.
The day he respond my email - I told him to set his time. He said if I can bring it to him somewhere.
I said I was fine and let me know the exact address and here's my messenger name..
Gosh, that moment he saw me - really I knew how he felt. Heavy and wanted to hug me. He smiled and looks to me
sadly...it was like telling me - M, put your ego down.
I don't look back where I stumble - people use your weakness as weapon against you. Though my heart was heavy that day. I always think about myself.. Stop M. Stop!
you will be fine soon. don't give in. leave for good.
I hope you know what to do now.. be careful how you deliver the msg. keep it light. no other intention.
Good luck. Focus to yourself now.
Noted.
Thank you all for your input.
Posted by AnomalousBull
Jello Pudding!
Seriously, no love for Jello!? You win a man's heart through his stomach! I.E Pudding.
Please leave the stuff alone. I know its an excuse to try to communicate and see him again ( been there done that)
He needs to breath. Leave the stuff there , TRUST ME if you want him back....give him the space..try to focus on yourself and what you did wrong and what you could do better if you were to get back together.... send him a post card for his birthday and thats THAT>
Trust me after a while, and he doesn't care from you and your stuff and memories are lingering,,, then there's a much higher chance of him wanting to reconnect with you.....
This is my advice, it will work on me... 🙂
asking for the STUFF back will really push the button, that would mean it will be over for all.. if thats what you really want then go ahead..but i'm warning you it won't end well 🙂
He needs to breath. Leave the stuff there , TRUST ME if you want him back....give him the space..try to focus on yourself and what you did wrong and what you could do better if you were to get back together.... send him a post card for his birthday and thats THAT>
Trust me after a while, and he doesn't care from you and your stuff and memories are lingering,,, then there's a much higher chance of him wanting to reconnect with you.....
This is my advice, it will work on me... 🙂
asking for the STUFF back will really push the button, that would mean it will be over for all.. if thats what you really want then go ahead..but i'm warning you it won't end well 🙂
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