Taurus Boyfriend is acting differently

Hello all!
I have been seeing my Taurus since January. We were wonderful in the beginning! Date nights, flowers, cards, cooking dinner together, spending time with our kids together, talking about marrige and having more kids, cuddling, love making. I used to see him everyday (we used to workout together)

And now, I felt a change in him a couple months ago. He is not as affectionate. He does not call me or text me back as he used to. No more dinners, date nights, alone time, no more talk of wedding planning, kids, nothing.
He seems like he is withdrawing from me.
I need to know why? Or how to get him to talk to me. He used to in the beginning too. Now he is ignoring me.
Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks!

How long since you noticed the change?

I had the same question as Lunarmaiden, and to add to that, if you recall when he started "acting differently" had there been any disagreements at that time? Also, I will say for me (and not responding for all Tau's out there; especially since I am not male), if I feel like I am doing a lot in a relationship and it's not appreciated then I start to pull away too, because (in my mind) it's being appreciated. Notice, I said appreciated and NOT reciprocated. I am not a "tit for tat" person. If I do anything for anyone, I don't expect anything in return (although niceties are always greatly appreciated 😉). So, if you haven't recently had any disagreements, etc, then it could be he's feeling under appreciated and has withdrawn himself. Also, you could just ask him too. Not in an excusatory way, but more in the "Hey Babe, what's going on? I feel like we aren't as connected as we were 2/3/4 months ago. Or, you could plan a date night or something unexpected too. Obviously I don't know the dynamics of your relationship inside out, but if you were intimate and talking about marriage, etc, then I think you could also do a little "wooing" him too. When I am in a relationship, I LOVE to spoil my man. It's a blessing and a curse, but it makes ME feel good. Just a little food for thought. Perhaps others will be able to pop in and share some insight too.

Lunar-it's been 2 months now.

USCT- asking if we have had an argument, I'd say no. He say we fight all the time. In my eyes they are conversations & communicating, not fights.
We don't raise our voices, call each other names, sulk, pout or try to make the other feel less important. Those are fights...this, not so much!
I've tried several times in the last two months for date night...he's messed it up every time. I'm trying again this weekend as a matter of fact! I am one who also likes to "woo"! So you are not alone!
I recently bought him flowers & a card. 🙂
The feeling I'm getting from him is he has never dated anyone who is or shows emotions. I do.
Or it could be an ex before me tried to come back in the picture...now I am only speculating here but I am sucpicious on why he's acting this way.
Do Taurus men stray?
I'm trying to get him to talk to me, but he just stares at me and says nothing. I'm a Sag & my patience is getting very thin.
Thanks!

When did the talk of marriage pop out of the nasty can it lives in—

Posted by ArticleL
When did the talk of marriage pop out of the nasty can it lives in—

In the beginning. No worries now though, he finally talked to me and said he didn't know if he wanted to be with me. So I told him to go on his merry way and to take care. I am DONE!

^^Good, now you can move on to someone who will appreciate you. That's not to say he was an a $ $ or anything, but if you were questioning your relationship and not feeling secure in it, then it's best to move on and find someone you are compatible with! Life is too short to be wasting your time.

Wow people ditch people but keep there most lovable possesions, pets. Wtf is the world coming to how does one expect to love when at the slightest change they throw away what looks like a empty milk cartoon. Then they come back like I think I fucked up I mean we know your a fuck up but sheesh. The second to last sentence is directed at the world ignore it. Be sure this is what to want to do and be ready to fight if he rejects you coming back. Which makes two of you.

Posted by NikkiMse1978

Posted by ArticleL
When did the talk of marriage pop out of the nasty can it lives in—

In the beginning. No worries now though, he finally talked to me and said he didn't know if he wanted to be with me. So I told him to go on his merry way and to take care. I am DONE!

click to expand

I'm confused, did you ask him why he was feeling uncertain before you dumped him?

Posted by NikkiMse1978
USCT- asking if we have had an argument, I'd say no. He say we fight all the time. In my eyes they are conversations & communicating, not fights.
We don't raise our voices, call each other names, sulk, pout or try to make the other feel less important. Those are fights...this, not so much!
I've tried several times in the last two months for date night...he's messed it up every time. I'm trying again this weekend as a matter of fact! I am one who also likes to "woo"! So you are not alone!
I recently bought him flowers & a card. 🙂
The feeling I'm getting from him is he has never dated anyone who is or shows emotions. I do.
Or it could be an ex before me tried to come back in the picture...now I am only speculating here but I am sucpicious on why he's acting this way.
Do Taurus men stray?
I'm trying to get him to talk to me, but he just stares at me and says nothing. I'm a Sag & my patience is getting very thin.
Thanks!

Taurus men need patient women. Sag is not patient and it sounds like you two are having disagreements. Sag is a fire sign and can compartmentalize the different levels of arguments. Because Sag actually likes to argue. Taurus likes smooth sailing most of the time. They may like a little fire from their women but not someone looking for a fight or directing that energy toward them on a consistent basis. I say try a Leo, that's more your speed; they will love you. They are fixed signs and love independent fiery women who like to banter with them.

Posted by ArticleL
Wow people ditch people but keep there most lovable possesions, pets. Wtf is the world coming to how does one expect to love when at the slightest change they throw away what looks like a empty milk cartoon. Then they come back like I think I fucked up I mean we know your a fuck up but sheesh. The second to last sentence is directed at the world ignore it. Be sure this is what to want to do and be ready to fight if he rejects you coming back. Which makes two of you.

I completely agree with this. There is too much impatience, blowing off, disappearing and assuming the worse.

you've only been seeing him 7 months, spending every day together and talking of marriage in that short space of time should have been a red flag, when any man does that so quickly you have to prepare for the freak out down the line.

Posted by USCTaurusGal
^^Good, now you can move on to someone who will appreciate you. That's not to say he was an a $ $ or anything, but if you were questioning your relationship and not feeling secure in it, then it's best to move on and find someone you are compatible with! Life is too short to be wasting your time.

He was actually first in questioning it, so I made his decision for him. It was not an easy one, and we may cross paths again or still have unfinished business but this is how it has to be for now.

Posted by ArticleL
Wow people ditch people but keep there most lovable possesions, pets. Wtf is the world coming to how does one expect to love when at the slightest change they throw away what looks like a empty milk cartoon. Then they come back like I think I fucked up I mean we know your a fuck up but sheesh. The second to last sentence is directed at the world ignore it. Be sure this is what to want to do and be ready to fight if he rejects you coming back. Which makes two of you.

Him not being able to express his true feelings to me for more than two months was the ultimate rejection. When you have a significant other, whether it be a boyfriend, girlfriend, long term partner, soul mate, friend or lover, you should be able to express clearly to the other, your fears, sorrows, triumphs, accomplishments, tears, and the like. If you do not, then what kind of relationship is it?

Posted by LunarMaiden

Posted by NikkiMse1978

Posted by ArticleL
When did the talk of marriage pop out of the nasty can it lives in—

In the beginning. No worries now though, he finally talked to me and said he didn't know if he wanted to be with me. So I told him to go on his merry way and to take care. I am DONE!

I'm confused, did you ask him why he was feeling uncertain before you dumped him?

click to expand

Hi Lunar-Yes, I did.

Posted by LunarMaiden

Posted by NikkiMse1978
USCT- asking if we have had an argument, I'd say no. He say we fight all the time. In my eyes they are conversations & communicating, not fights.
We don't raise our voices, call each other names, sulk, pout or try to make the other feel less important. Those are fights...this, not so much!
I've tried several times in the last two months for date night...he's messed it up every time. I'm trying again this weekend as a matter of fact! I am one who also likes to "woo"! So you are not alone!
I recently bought him flowers & a card. 🙂
The feeling I'm getting from him is he has never dated anyone who is or shows emotions. I do.
Or it could be an ex before me tried to come back in the picture...now I am only speculating here but I am sucpicious on why he's acting this way.
Do Taurus men stray?
I'm trying to get him to talk to me, but he just stares at me and says nothing. I'm a Sag & my patience is getting very thin.
Thanks!

Taurus men need patient women. Sag is not patient and it sounds like you two are having disagreements. Sag is a fire sign and can compartmentalize the different levels of arguments. Because Sag actually likes to argue. Taurus likes smooth sailing most of the time. They may like a little fire from their women but not someone looking for a fight or directing that energy toward them on a consistent basis. I say try a Leo, that's more your speed; they will love you. They are fixed signs and love independent fiery women who like to banter with them.

click to expand

I do not need a fight. I need peace and solitude and someone who can tell me what is going on in there brain. Human nature!

Posted by celticlioness
you've only been seeing him 7 months, spending every day together and talking of marriage in that short space of time should have been a red flag, when any man does that so quickly you have to prepare for the freak out down the line.

Excellent Celtic. Point taken!

Taurus contacted me last night to tell me his grandmother on his dad's side is very ill. She will be with the angels soon. I was not heartless, I listened to him. Consoled him, and offered my help if he needs it.
As far as what is happening-most of it is words. We care about and both love each other, but I am still standing my ground as he is.
My retreat is a red flag in front of the bull, surrendering. .

Thank you all for your kind words! 🙂

Posted by Let*It*Be
Well, hopefully things work out in the end. What I noticed from your first post to the relationship ending was a severe lack of communication somewhere in between. It just doesn't add up. I mean..when he started to pull away were you asking him what you asked us in the very first post? Something happened prior to that..did you do the ultimatum thingy? Did you push for something more solid?

Hi Let*It*Be-
I am hoping they do. He is still distant. Seems he will be that way for awhile. I need to leave him be. He needs to process as Taurus's do and then get back to me.
Yes, I did ask him and point out to him what I originally asked everyone on the boards. Over, and over and over again. Until I was a broken record.
I finally asked him in the last week what was up...if he wanted to be with me or not. Funny thing is, we were together. Solid, committed, monogamous relationship. HE just never let ME KNOW when it changed.

Posted by Let*It*Be
That's a shame he stopped communicating. You are correct though, earth signs take their own sweet time..good luck.

That he did. Earth signs dig their heels into the earth, and the more they stop communicating, the more their roots grow. I will be as patient as I can be. Thanks!

My patience ran thin. I told the Taurus in my mind we were not together. He did not confirm nor deny.
I told him we needed to move on and to not contact me. Last night his ex was over when I went to stop by. I broke down.
He yelled at me that he called her since I told him to never contact me again. He told me I scare him so he called the police.
Needless to say he didn't press charges and I just went home.
I've thought all night that all if this is about him. How's he's hurting, how he is feeling and how my thoughts or feelings do not matter.
To me running to an ex for comfort is a huge betrayal. I'm not asking how I win him back, he set me up for defeat eons ago.
I'm seeking guidance, peace and light on why he was scared and why he said he was hurting enough to call the police on me?
In my eyes he took what I was trying to salvage and threw it away by calling his ex.
Thanks in advance for the insight!

Nikki, I'm sorry you are going through this heartache, but when I read your posts, I get very uncomfortable. You are a very confusing person. You break up with him (several times), then go to his house? The fact that he called the police tells me that we are not getting the full story.

It seems over, and I hope you let it end. I also hope you finally become at peace with this hole thing and move on to better.

Lunar his actions and words were just as confusing. I adapt to my situations so I essentially fed off his vibe if that even makes sense?
It's the whole story-he said he was scared so he called the police.
I can be scary when I'm fiery and equally docile when I'm calm.
Him telling me he does not know if he wants to be with me, but calling or texting the next day to be friendly confused the life out of me.
You either do, or you don't. There's no grey area and in this case no going back. He can have his ex, he obviously chose her.

Posted by NikkiMse1978

It's the whole story-he said he was scared so he called the police.
I can be scary when I'm fiery and equally docile when I'm calm.

"Fiery" = "crazy." If a GUY is scared enough to call the police, I can only imagine what your "firey" reaction was like.

Overall, just from your first post, I could tell it was over. When guys suddenly change and become distant, they're not interested anymore. They seem to think that women are some new toy and when the new toy excitement wears off, they toss you in the toy box and want to get something else. It's pretty lame.

Why did you go over to his place? You never really explained why. You say you gave the whole story, but there's a lot of missing detail. You suddenly backpedal and say "oh well he texted me the next day and was confusing..." K, kinda left that out. Also, there's nothing confusing about that. When someone is broken up with, they're left reeling. His communicating with you isn't out of the ordinary as being the one who was broken up with.

I don't blame you about his uncertainty though. I kinda laughed when you just broke it off. Chances are you would have been dragged along for the emotional bs ride while he takes his time figuring shit out. Too many guys do this and they know they can because women let them get away with it.

Regardless, like you said, it's done. I wouldn't bother communicating with him and let him deal with his own crap. Don't talk to him or text him. Emotions need to be sorted out.

I think this experience will give you wisdom that will help you in future relationships. Consider this bullet dodged!

Rocky-it was over at that time, and 2 months ago when I "felt" the change. It took him that long to tell me what he was truly feeling-and I cannot or will not be with a man who does not know.
There will be no communication on my part, you can mark my words on that. In my past relationship I was with an Aqua for 3 years, and he was in love with me one moment (calling, texting, wanting to see me) and not in love with me the next (ignored me, had no contact, told me it was best if we left each other alone. "It's not a good idea.")
So I believe this time around, the no contact lesson is already learned.

Thank you for the great insight! 🙂

Can you post more details about his chart?

Posted by IntriguedScorp
I don't know but this sounds like the infamous Taurus explosion. It takes a lot to get a Bull to explode in anger but when they do its like a nuclear bomb. This guy has probably been holding in his emotions for sometime hoping that you would get his frame of mind. He's prodded you with hints: we fight too much, we don't see eye to eye on things, etc, etc. It sounds like, because you didn't agree with him, you just brushed past his concerns like they were silly. "Of we don't fight, we have discussions."

Well, Tauman has been telling you that he sees them as fights.

Finally, he explodes when you show up and bring fiery drama to his home. All his repressed anger explodes. There is no way in hell, that a man is going to call the cops without reason.

I have a Sag friend and she got the cops called on her because she was blustering like a crazy woman in the middle of the street at her man and ended up slapping him. Her man was a gentle soul who had had enough. The cops came. Sag can get quite explosive--and I might add a little irrational--when they get fire in their eyes. I'm not saying your side of the story is untrue. I'm just saying its your side of the story.

Just because I did not agree with him is not cause to persuade my feelings to feel how he does. I am my own person-mind, body and soul.
Did I yell? Of course. His ex was there. Did I blame him. Of course-his ex was there, yet again I will say it. And he threw our relationship away for her.
Goes to show what type of MAN (Taurus or not) he really is.
But I do appreciate your story. As an immature Sag I acted in that manner. As a mature Sag-now I do not.

🙂

Posted by Caquaries
Can you post more details about his chart?

I only know his Bday. It is May 9th, 1977. We never got around to doing his full birth chart 😢

As a mature Leo, I personally have never acted out that way



😛 😛

Well he has a lot of Aries in his chart. Venus and Mars in Aries. Falls in love fast and falls out of love faster. I hear that Taurus' with a lot of aries in chart are abusive. Curious. Any truth to that?

Posted by RoseTheTaurus
Well he has a lot of Aries in his chart. Venus and Mars in Aries. Falls in love fast and falls out of love faster. I hear that Taurus' with a lot of aries in chart are abusive. Curious. Any truth to that?

I'm looking for a Taurus with a lot of Aries in his chart. 😛

He has an Aqua moon which probably made him come off a bit emotionally detached. Nikki do yo know his time of birth?

Posted by RoseTheTaurus
Well he has a lot of Aries in his chart. Venus and Mars in Aries. Falls in love fast and falls out of love faster. I hear that Taurus' with a lot of aries in chart are abusive. Curious. Any truth to that?

In the 8 months we were together he was never abusive. In the end emotional abuse occurred (him going back to his ex) but that is all. Not of the physical kind.

Posted by LunarMaiden
He has an Aqua moon which probably made him come off a bit emotionally detached. Nikki do yo know his time of birth?

He came off emotionally detached all right! No, I do not. We always meant to do his chart, but never got around to it.

Nikki...how do you know for sure he *went back* to her? Because she was there that night? That doesnt mean anything.

Everytime I have a heartbreak, or significant issue flair, I turn to my ex-gemini for solace. But not to sleep with. He is just a nice guy to me.

Isnt that a possiblity? I mean, it seems you did hurt him some what by letting him go.

It may not mean anything but to me you don't go running to an ex when you are down, or low or need to talk. You reach out to the person whom the talk needs to take place with. I believe he is back with her. He didn't deny it otherwise, but only confirmed it by having her there. You can turn to someone close for comfort or advice, sure. An ex, not in my eyes.
He hurt me first by saying what he said and what needed to be said months ago. I HAD to let him go.

He didn't "throw the relationship away for his ex" - you ended it.

He's a free agent and can invite whomever he pleases to his home. You can't go breaking up with him and then drop by making demands or getting pissed off when he has another woman there because you ended it and you no longer get a say in what he does, where he goes, who he sees, who he hangs out with, who he sleeps with, etc.

Don't take this the wrong way because i don't mean to be rude or nasty, but I've seen you on these very boards acting out and spazzing off at people, so I'm not surprised you scare him. You appear unstable at times - fine and funny one minute, rude and angry when you don't like reading/hearing something you don't want to read/hear.

What I'm reading throughout this thread is that you blame him completely for everything. Nowhere do I get a sense that you're owning up to anything you've done. You're downplaying - and I feel you're doing it a lot. No man suddenly decides that he doesn't want to be with a woman he committed himself to at the start - not unless the relationship has worn him down to a point where his feelings vanish. So I ask - what responsibility do you take for the demise of your relationship? Perhaps if you looked inwardly instead of looking to blame everyone else you may get to a point where you see what it's like to be in a relationship with you and then you'll learn as to why you make people scared of you. Of course, you won't want to read that, and will probably deny it's an issue, but that's your choice.

I just don't believe you're as sweet and innocent in this at all. Own your part.

That said, it's a shame it ended because most of us start off with hopes and desires for a relationship and when it turns to shit it's very sad. I feel he was a bit of a coward in not telling you he had doubts about you, but perhaps he was holding out some hope that things would get better, as a lot of people do when they're 50/50 on staying or going. I hope you have good support around you and that your friends and family are there for you.