MichelleT
@MichelleT
8 Years
Comments: 0 · Posts: 80 · Topics: 3
Taurus Man Pulling Back
You're not the problem..he is!
Are you still dating? Is it an exclusive relationship? What is it?
@taurusbull1977 has a Gem moon and Taurus Sun, and is likely to assist with some sound insight if she’s about.
@taurusbull1977 has a Gem moon and Taurus Sun, and is likely to assist with some sound insight if she’s about.
Posted by AgentP911I think we still are dating. We haven't had the exclusivity conversation, but both of us have said we don't and aren't seeing others. I said I just wanted to let it evolve into whatever it was gonna be. I was feeling great until around 10days ago or so. Felt very confident in our relationship. Now this.
Are you still dating? Is it an exclusive relationship? What is it?
@taurusbull1977 has a Gem moon and Taurus Sun, and is likely to assist with some sound insight if she’s about.
Posted by LauritaI don't know that it's a matter of anyone being a problem at this point.
You're not the problem..he is!
I just want to know what to do. Nothing, something, all the things. My natural inclination is to be super extra right now. I kinda feel like that might be a bad call.
@Michelle T
Are you needy and want a relationship?
Or detached and going with the flow?
This ambiguous 'aura' you're giving off may cause confusion for this fickle combination.
Taurus Sun= Structure and stability
Gemini Moon =Emotional freedom and unpredictability.
With no real structure, the emotions will be liberated, fluctuate, and then...fleet.
Things occur organically with Bulls.
But it has to be tangible, physical contact, personal interaction, an arousal of the senses.
Too much e-communication between the both of you.
This method dies out pretty fast.
Consistency is also very important, also a clear concise agenda on where you plan to take this relationship.
Ex: "I am really feeling you, I want to be with you...however, I will leave it up to the Universe, if it's meant to be, or not meant to be, there will be no love loss."
The bolded part states your agenda.
The ladder, gives the Moon structure and stability without any pressure being associated with it.
Are you needy and want a relationship?
Or detached and going with the flow?
This ambiguous 'aura' you're giving off may cause confusion for this fickle combination.
Taurus Sun= Structure and stability
Gemini Moon =Emotional freedom and unpredictability.
With no real structure, the emotions will be liberated, fluctuate, and then...fleet.
Things occur organically with Bulls.
But it has to be tangible, physical contact, personal interaction, an arousal of the senses.
Too much e-communication between the both of you.
This method dies out pretty fast.
Consistency is also very important, also a clear concise agenda on where you plan to take this relationship.
Ex: "I am really feeling you, I want to be with you...however, I will leave it up to the Universe, if it's meant to be, or not meant to be, there will be no love loss."
The bolded part states your agenda.
The ladder, gives the Moon structure and stability without any pressure being associated with it.
Posted by TaurusBull1977Thank you for your insight. I should have come clean about my feelings earlier instead of being so vague. I was afraid I'd drive him off. At this point, however, I feel I have little to lose by giving him a clearer picture of my desires for our relationship.
@Michelle T
Are you needy and want a relationship?
Or detached and going with the flow?
This ambiguous 'aura' you're giving off may cause confusion for this fickle combination.
Taurus Sun= Structure and stability
Gemini Moon =Emotional freedom and unpredictability.
With no real structure, the emotions will be liberated, fluctuate, and then...fleet.
Things occur organically with Bulls.
But it has to be tangible, physical contact, personal interaction, an arousal of the senses.
Too much e-communication between the both of you.
This method dies out pretty fast.
Consistency is also very important, also a clear concise agenda on where you plan to take this relationship.
Ex: "I am really feeling you, I want to be with you...however, I will leave it up to the Universe, if it's meant to be, or not meant to be, there will be no love loss."
The bolded part states your agenda.
The ladder, gives the Moon structure and stability without any pressure being associated with it.
So then I guess I need to look at the timing. This is a face to face conversation, but I need to get him in front of me to do that.
I did attempt to FaceTime him last night and sent a text when he didn't answer. Do I just wait now for him to contact me? He is still on the road at work. Do I give him time to get home and then contact him myself to get face to face?
@taurusbull1977 would you be open to a PM with more specific detail?
Updated
So after a few weeks of low communication, I decided to FaceTime him. He answered like nothing was out of sorts between the two of us and told me he was very sick.
The same limited communication tempo has continued. He did cancel plans with me last minute because he was still sick. I actually believe this to be true. Everyone I know has some lingering illness, including myself, and it's making us all feel pretty rough. I offered to bring him soup, with no response.
Part of me feels as though nothing is wrong and that he's just retreating as he doesn't have time to handle everything and illness at once, but part of me, the insecure scared part, feels him slipping off. I haven't told him what @taurusbull1977 told me to yet, because I haven't been able to be in his physical presence. I feel like if I don't tell him soon, this non problem will become an actual problem, but at this point, I don't know how to get an audience with him.
I'm sad because I really do care for him and want him and I really think I screwed everything up by not speaking to his traditional needs for security earlier and drawing boundaries where I needed them.
Any thoughts?
So after a few weeks of low communication, I decided to FaceTime him. He answered like nothing was out of sorts between the two of us and told me he was very sick.
The same limited communication tempo has continued. He did cancel plans with me last minute because he was still sick. I actually believe this to be true. Everyone I know has some lingering illness, including myself, and it's making us all feel pretty rough. I offered to bring him soup, with no response.
Part of me feels as though nothing is wrong and that he's just retreating as he doesn't have time to handle everything and illness at once, but part of me, the insecure scared part, feels him slipping off. I haven't told him what @taurusbull1977 told me to yet, because I haven't been able to be in his physical presence. I feel like if I don't tell him soon, this non problem will become an actual problem, but at this point, I don't know how to get an audience with him.
I'm sad because I really do care for him and want him and I really think I screwed everything up by not speaking to his traditional needs for security earlier and drawing boundaries where I needed them.
Any thoughts?
Posted by MichelleTI also have a Taurus sun gem moon boyfriend however he made it official week two.
Updated
So after a few weeks of low communication, I decided to FaceTime him. He answered like nothing was out of sorts between the two of us and told me he was very sick.
The same limited communication tempo has continued. He did cancel plans with me last minute because he was still sick. I actually believe this to be true. Everyone I know has some lingering illness, including myself, and it's making us all feel pretty rough. I offered to bring him soup, with no response.
Part of me feels as though nothing is wrong and that he's just retreating as he doesn't have time to handle everything and illness at once, but part of me, the insecure scared part, feels him slipping off. I haven't told him what @taurusbull1977 told me to yet, because I haven't been able to be in his physical presence. I feel like if I don't tell him soon, this non problem will become an actual problem, but at this point, I don't know how to get an audience with him.
I'm sad because I really do care for him and want him and I really think I screwed everything up by not speaking to his traditional needs for security earlier and drawing boundaries where I needed them.
Any thoughts?
Yes he dissapears and returns and then run off again... but he never leaves me alone. If I feel neglected I let him know. This is also long distance... so I see him whenever he goes out of town we alsways meet up half way and when I'm with him it feels like he puts everything he can into me... then he focusses on other things when he's gone.
I've learned the balance now but I still feel alone at times... I speak to him and he responds. It's the gem moon aspect for sure... out of all the Tauruses they are the most restless... I hate it but I allow him to be all over the place and sit still watching him go off until he'll be like, hey I need to slow down for her, then he's off again. Talk to him... he will always be off, but he'll come back if he cares trust me.
I am a Taurus sun and moon, Aries Venus, scorp mars
He is Taurus sun gem moon, Aries Venus, Taurus mars.
@TaurusInShania
Thank you for responding. I want to tell him. I've never been good with explaining my feelings. I'm very withheld and I can't help but feel that's a contributing factor. My own moon in Capricorn isn't helpful. I get in my own head and frustrate myself.
When to tell him and how at this point? The last thing I want is to try to push a bull. I'm certain I'll just get the horns if I do.
Thank you for responding. I want to tell him. I've never been good with explaining my feelings. I'm very withheld and I can't help but feel that's a contributing factor. My own moon in Capricorn isn't helpful. I get in my own head and frustrate myself.
When to tell him and how at this point? The last thing I want is to try to push a bull. I'm certain I'll just get the horns if I do.
My bf disappears, but only when he's extremely stressed or depressed about a certain situation. He had a Virgo moon but he's a Gemini dominant (3 personal planets in Gemini). When he's not stressed we talk and see each other all the time. Idk maybe it's a Taurus with heavy Gemini thing?
He also likes to hide that he's stressed out. He won't tell me. I have to drag it out of him. Maybe yours is stressed and his hiding it?
He also likes to hide that he's stressed out. He won't tell me. I have to drag it out of him. Maybe yours is stressed and his hiding it?
@crazyariestaurus
The stress is what i was thinking as well. He tries to hold so much together all the time and I think he views it as weakness to be less than a super hero. Perhaps it's that thing bulls do we're they always want to impress you.
The timing of a conversation with him regarding my needs and desires for the relationship has to be spot on though, since the stress level is high and bulls notoriously don't like being pushed. I also wouldn't want to increase anyone's stress level regardless of their placements.
The stress is what i was thinking as well. He tries to hold so much together all the time and I think he views it as weakness to be less than a super hero. Perhaps it's that thing bulls do we're they always want to impress you.
The timing of a conversation with him regarding my needs and desires for the relationship has to be spot on though, since the stress level is high and bulls notoriously don't like being pushed. I also wouldn't want to increase anyone's stress level regardless of their placements.
Posted by MichelleTYeah I feel like my bf is the same way. I get like this too at times (I'm also a bull but Aqua dominant).
@crazyariestaurus
The stress is what i was thinking as well. He tries to hold so much together all the time and I think he views it as weakness to be less than a super hero. Perhaps it's that thing bulls do we're they always want to impress you.
The timing of a conversation with him regarding my needs and desires for the relationship has to be spot on though, since the stress level is high and bulls notoriously don't like being pushed. I also wouldn't want to increase anyone's stress level regardless of their placements.
I'm just basing this all on my own experience and just the fact that he's a Taurus could be wrong, but I think it's ok to approach him while he's stressed. I think it's just all about HOW you approach him. Just come at him in a very loving way that isn't threatening. If you do it in a confrontational matter you'll feel the wrath.
@crazyariestaurus
Thank you. After my last post, he did respond to the text I sent him this morning letting him know I was thinking about him. It was just a simple "thank you." I personally think this is positive as he has told me that he will not deal with me when I am emotional and will just ignore me. It's not my chatty chasing bull, but I'll take it for now.
What in your mind would be an ideal way to approach him? I hate doing this by text. We both have our kids to cause distraction until late in the evening so FaceTime is out and obviously we can't meet in person today or this weekend for the same reason. Should I just wait until next week to suggest a glass of wine or attempt to FaceTime him this weekend, as I usually do? I think him seeing my face when I tell him I need his attention is best. As @taurus1977 suggested, too much e communication is not good for us.
Thank you. After my last post, he did respond to the text I sent him this morning letting him know I was thinking about him. It was just a simple "thank you." I personally think this is positive as he has told me that he will not deal with me when I am emotional and will just ignore me. It's not my chatty chasing bull, but I'll take it for now.
What in your mind would be an ideal way to approach him? I hate doing this by text. We both have our kids to cause distraction until late in the evening so FaceTime is out and obviously we can't meet in person today or this weekend for the same reason. Should I just wait until next week to suggest a glass of wine or attempt to FaceTime him this weekend, as I usually do? I think him seeing my face when I tell him I need his attention is best. As @taurus1977 suggested, too much e communication is not good for us.
I think you're over thinking it.
However if there is something you don't like or are not happy with, say it.
I also think you should get at least a clear idea what you are doing with each other. From there you can establish some reasonable expectations.
Don't worry about pushing. I agree with thecrazyariestaurus. It is all about how you do it.
But you have a right to have your needs met. However he also can't know what they are unless you communicate with him.
You're an adult, you have children, I assume you've slept together, say what you want.
However if there is something you don't like or are not happy with, say it.
I also think you should get at least a clear idea what you are doing with each other. From there you can establish some reasonable expectations.
Don't worry about pushing. I agree with thecrazyariestaurus. It is all about how you do it.
But you have a right to have your needs met. However he also can't know what they are unless you communicate with him.
You're an adult, you have children, I assume you've slept together, say what you want.
@parkourler I would love your opinion on all of this if you have a moment.
To be honest, we are not great communicators, I can only speculate. Maybe he needs privacy, maybe he is overwhelmed with his life. I would just be straight up ask him, why does he do that. You have every right to be angry, but avoid bossiness, tell him how his behavior makes you feel like.
I want to. I can't entice him out of the shadows right now. Do I just need patience or is there anything I can do? I want to tell him I'm live with him, but I feel like that's not a text message.
I think you appeared needy. Why cook for this man and his kids and you have your own to tend to?
What did he do for you to deserve that treatment?
I think you gave too much too fast and he’s on to the next challenge.
What did he do for you to deserve that treatment?
I think you gave too much too fast and he’s on to the next challenge.
I dated a Taurus guy and he was clingy. He wanted to see me every night which was way too much plus their jealousy is off the charts. It was too much for this freedom loving Libra girl.
Wow. 5-6months NC!?!? Can I ask why you would go NC for so long and what you were up to in the mean time?
So here’s a happy update.
So we did get together the other day. He has been very sick and had quite a few personal challenges. He decided to retreat from the world and sleep. As I said before, this is legitimate and I believe it.
I took @taurusbull1977’s advice and told him I was ready to be exclusive without hemming him in. Something to the effect of “Im done messing around with other people when none of them compare to what I already have and the attention isn’t even flattering anymore.” I also told him I removed myself from online dating.” To which he replied, I should take myself off too.
We had a lovely day and talked at length about a variety of subjects. He stared at me and told me he loved listening to me talk and showed me his most prized possession and spoke about the future.
We met for another date today, at which time he engaged in PDA,which he normally does not, and asked me to spend the weekend with him doing his favorite thing, nothing, in his fortress of solitude.
I over reacted. It may have all been a test based in a legitimately difficult period for him, or simply happenstance, but I would call this a success. My new challenge is remembering not to be so watery and emotionally reactive to the fantastic delusion I create out of my neediness. Also remembering that I’m awesome and any man would be lucky to have me.
Thank you to everyone who weighed in. This one is pretty awesome. I just gotta get out of my own way.
So we did get together the other day. He has been very sick and had quite a few personal challenges. He decided to retreat from the world and sleep. As I said before, this is legitimate and I believe it.
I took @taurusbull1977’s advice and told him I was ready to be exclusive without hemming him in. Something to the effect of “Im done messing around with other people when none of them compare to what I already have and the attention isn’t even flattering anymore.” I also told him I removed myself from online dating.” To which he replied, I should take myself off too.
We had a lovely day and talked at length about a variety of subjects. He stared at me and told me he loved listening to me talk and showed me his most prized possession and spoke about the future.
We met for another date today, at which time he engaged in PDA,which he normally does not, and asked me to spend the weekend with him doing his favorite thing, nothing, in his fortress of solitude.
I over reacted. It may have all been a test based in a legitimately difficult period for him, or simply happenstance, but I would call this a success. My new challenge is remembering not to be so watery and emotionally reactive to the fantastic delusion I create out of my neediness. Also remembering that I’m awesome and any man would be lucky to have me.
Thank you to everyone who weighed in. This one is pretty awesome. I just gotta get out of my own way.
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