What does Taurus Man want? Is he using me?

I have dated my taurus for 4 years and everything was great. Suddenly he meets a new "friend" female (Cancer) and he becomes distant to me. I know there hasn't been anything physical between them, because she is vocal about who she is crushing on and never stops talking about him. But he out-of-the-blue breaks up with me, saying I am too jealous of his friend.

But within days he is texting me and calling me. He said, when we broke up that he can see us back together in the future but i need to stop acting crazy about his friends. We talk everyday.

He verbally and in texts always tells me he loves me. And I recently spent the weekend with him, we were intimate and all seemed good, but he did refer to me as his ex. Now today, I know he is hanging out with that same Cancer girl, and whenever he is with her, he completely ignores me.

My problem is this, he basically admitted he wants her (physically), very bad. He is trying to use the Friend route to do this, and then also told me he wanted to have a threesome with me, to which I am down for. But why does he ignore me when he is around her now that we are broken up, but act like we are still together, 5 days a week? Very Confusing!

down.............for?

Uh...WTF?

keep it moving

He's keeping you around because you're comfortable,and familiar.You give him sex when she's apparently not,yet.
Some people live by the standard "we're broken up",in order to sleep with other people and not consider it cheating.Once he gets in her pants,if they don't develop a relationship....he's telling you he'll be ready to come back to you.

Hmmm, he breaks up with you over a new "friend" that he hardly knows yet you have known him for 4 years. Sounds like this Bull is full of Bull. I think he is trying to figure out who he is going to keep. There is a new girl he is clearly attracted to but it hasn't gone where he wants it to go, yet. But then he has you waiting for him so if that doesn't pan out, he will go back to you. Men can't move on unless they have a sure thing waiting for them on the other side, he's waiting for the Cancer to give him the green light and you are waiting for him to give you the green light. A 3some doesn't make sense; if your relationship is too open a Bull will not feel the security he craves. Enter the Cancer.... Your relationship is over, you just need to, Go find a Leo!

Posted by MellowAriesLady


My problem is this, he basically admitted he wants her (physically), very bad. He is trying to use the Friend route to do this, and then also told me he wanted to have a threesome with me, to which I am down for. But why does he ignore me when he is around her now that we are broken up, but act like we are still together, 5 days a week? Very Confusing!

Forgodsake don't tell me this is another Taurus who has gemini in venus. Tell this taurus slut to back the off and leave you alone. I think you are being used. He wants to be with you on his own terms and I doesn't acknowledge you that much.

He has Venus in Taurus, but Mars in Gemini. I have Venus in Pisces and Mars in Capricorn. She has Venus in Gemini, Mars in Aries. Hmm, maybe her Venus and his Mars are their attraction?

He told me today they have had sex(!) and that he does have a huge crush on her. But after they were together, she left him to another guy's house, the one she actually likes. I believe she is using him to make the other guy jealous.

I agree he is keeping me around as a back-up, if things don't go as planned with Cancer girl. What makes me so mad is I was right to be suspicious and "act jealous" of her, and his denials that only fueled my fire and made me look "crazy" in his eyes.

He created the situation, then threw it back on me. Argh! Men... I am happy he finally came clean about it all and I really do think she is gonna burn him in the long run. I'll see how I feel once its all said and done, if I still want him back. I will stay friends with him until then I guess. lol I just don't want my heart broken twice by him, so my guard is up. 🙂

Wow.For an Aries,you're taking it so much easier than I would....

Well I really do love him, and maybe it would make more sense if you knew I am 15 years older than he is... so I feel like I need to give him some freedom to make sure what I know, that we are perfect for each other. I never want him in the future to feel that I may have robbed him of something, or experience.

But I'm calm now, sorta. lol If he is using me for sex, I just want to know, so I can adjust my expectations for that.

Is this a typical Taurus m.o.? to string along their past lover?

There's nothing confusing about this situation. You're making it confusing. The man told you he is on a mission to hit the skins with the cancer. THAT??S why he ignores you. He's on a mission when he's around her. To be honest I'm hoping the Cancer is smart enough to not deal with him if she's looking for something serious because it seems he's only after her for sex, and then he will be right back with you and she'll be in the cold.
I know it's wrong to judge and please forgive me, but honestly are you seriously planning on sharing him sexually with this woman?!! Heck no! I mean honestly if that's the case then BOTH of you should be hanging out with her getting to know her. It's so much stuff getting passed around all type of stuff that hasn't been discovered yet, YOU need to meet her and get to know her too, make sure she clean had all her damn shots to make sure you don't catch nothing don't be just taking his word for it, check her yourself and make sure she aint crazy and nasty. Sorry but when its comes to passage between my legs, Everything on the key trying to enter better check out correctly healthy. Be careful.

Hol up did the person above seriously say go find a Leo?? LOL. Heck no. They'd scratch her eyes out for even looking at someone else, let alone trying to sleep with someone else. I'd say a sagg or another Aries. Aries and Aries, now that is an explosion in itself.lol

I love to see older female/younger male pairings but this is one of the reasons why it won't work when love is in the equation because some older women think it's okay to give the younger guy a pass because he's young, this should be a deal breaker for any woman being treated this way, he doesn't get a pass to break up with you only to pursue someone younger only to come back to you when it's not working out the way he thought, giving him freedom to jerk you around isn't about age, it's about you somewhere along the way losing your dignity, chunking your boundaries (if you ever had any) out the window which leads to desperation, your down for a threesome, down to do whatever to keep this clown around which breathes desparity.

"But I'm calm now, sorta. lol If he is using me for sex, I just want to know, so I can adjust my expectations for that."

Of course he's using you for sex, you know this already just like you knew he was dumping you for another woman, you have really sharp gut instincts so use those instincts and adjust your expectations because after 4 years of dating and this is your REWARD (him chasing another woman, having sex with another woman) then you definitely need to take a step back and re-evaluate what your expectations are from this man, clearly he isn't that into you if after 4 years he's chasing another woman.

I don't know if this is typical taurus behavior because any man of any astrological sign can behave this way, relationships MOVE FORWARD, if the relationship isn't moving forward into marriage, co-habitation, building a life together then it stalls and when it stalls typically a man will move forward without you, after 4 years HE KNOW he has to marry you, do something to move the relationship forward or place less value on the relationship if he doesn't intend on marrying you and attempt to move on.

Tiki33, there is so much truth in what you wrote. We had reached a point of stagnation, of not progressing to the next steps. I have been in a custody battle and he had to move about 100 miles away so we only saw each other weekends, and so there you go. He kept moving forward while I was stalled.

Now my custody has been resolved, and I was planning on relocating to where he lives. Now, unless there are drastic changes and apologies from him, then that is it.

I know any sign can behave this way, its just that he was so damn attentive and sweet for so long, his drastic change of behavior blew me away. I guess my thoughts were, once Taurus does this is it the end for good? Has he fallen out of love with me? Because there are some who will cheat, yet still love you and its a game to them.

I will stick around him for awhile, maybe 1 month more, only because so much time as been invested and we got along so well until this.

As far as the threesome goes, well I do know her, and he and I have had an adventurous sex life and this was one of the last tings we wanted to do. He suggested Cancer girl and I thought she was a good choice. He flipped it on me saying I pushed him to her, that it was my idea... No, it wasn't for him to get a crush and end my friendship with her and dump me.

"Now my custody has been resolved, and I was planning on relocating to where he lives. Now, unless there are drastic changes and apologies from him, then that is it. "

Why chase this guy by relocating? Moving to him is not helping him INVEST in you emotionally, if anything he'll run. If you move let it be for others reasons OUTSIDE of him so you won't invest in someone who is wasting your time. Plus why drag your kid/s through more bullshit with another man, a custody battle, losing a father and potentially being dragged through another dead end relationship is way too heavy for children, pay attention to the message you're sending to your kid/s.

"I know any sign can behave this way, its just that he was so damn attentive and sweet for so long, his drastic change of behavior blew me away. I guess my thoughts were, once Taurus does this is it the end for good? Has he fallen out of love with me? Because there are some who will cheat, yet still love you and its a game to them."

Well yeah I can see how that would be hard to let go of but that's the past, look at how he's treating you NOW or you'll get stuck on what was rather than what is.

once Taurus does this is it the end for good? If you allow him to cheat no it's not the end for good, he'll always have you around as a fallback girl/back up plan.

Has he fallen out of love with me?The question is was he ever in love with you? If you dumped you so callously, lied, then no he wasn't that into you, you were convenient since he only had to play Mr.Perfect on the weekends, WAKE UP and look at how he's treating you NOW.

"Because there are some who will cheat, yet still love you and its a game to them."

Do you truly want to sit around wondering about a guy who cheats and plays games? Aren't you above that? Is that what you see for yourself? Being with a guy that cheats and plays a bunch mindfuck games...I'm sure you divorced for a really good reason and thus it makes no sense to go back into a potentially toxic unhealthy relationship with another man.

"As far as the threesome goes, well I do know her, and he and I have had an adventurous sex life and this was one of the last tings we wanted to do. He suggested Cancer girl and I thought she was a good choice. He flipped it on me saying I pushed him to her, that it was my idea... No, it wasn't for him to get a crush and end my friendship with her and dump me."

So you lost a friend over this clown....Can't you see how toxic this guy is? You're not GAINING, you're losing, you're losing yourself, you're losing your mind over his indiscretion with another woman, losing/lost your friend, losing a boyfriend and gaining a lying cheater who is attempting to get you into a triangulated situation with another woman because he's not ready for commitment.

You lost your friend, he dumped you, he lied about his sexual indiscretion/crush on her for the longest only to later come clean that he's INTO her as in crushing on her but she left him for another guy so he's back to you his back up plan ONLY b/c she's not availabe. I mean don't you want, know you deserve better than that? Can't you see how you're damaging your self esteem by being his back girl? You have to feel damn awful watching him be "INTO" someone else. Don't you deserve to have someone be "INTO" you too?

All I cnd do is smh..

This is so sad to read. Sticking around because you invested 4 years? This isnt a stock....throwing good self esteem after bad will diminish you more.

Did you forget your value?

Sounds like the 3some was a bad idea. You prolly should have found a Sag girl to have a 3some with. Because then it would have just been about the sex, not the emotional connection and chemistry he found with Cancer. I think you really need to give yourself time away from this guy, like another poster said he's toxic and this relationship is toxic. Focus on you now.

I guess I have forgotten my value.

OMG, that is soooo disgusting. Don't you feel you are like his mom— never go for someone who is younger than you. Taurus men like young women and all men do. I am sure he is not only using you for sex, he is using you for your money also. They are materialistic too. Please have respect for yourself and find someone who matches your age and mind, disgusting.

Hmmmm... I saw this post as a current one, but it would seem it is an old story. What happened since then ?!! What did 2012 decide for you —

Hmmmm... looks like that was the last post MellowAriesLady made... I guess we will never know.

Ive witnessed firsthand the chemistry between a Taurus male and Cancer female. In a weird way, I understand the Aries position. I guess theres almost an innocence in the Taurus not being able to control his desire in this situation. As if he couldnt hide it if he tried.

Id just put it like, a Taurus "trying" to make you jealous hurts more than a natural chemistry/desire imo.

I do hope the Aries moved on.