A virgo thinks he's gonna fall for me....Really?

So I'm a libra end of sept. Been friends with a virgo for a year. We never saw eachother in a romantic way never even dated. Just friends among a nice group of people. But you could tell there's been some flirting casually going on, never took it further and we never saw it in anything more than friends.

One day we were supposed to go out a group of friends. Didn't work out with almost everybody so we decided to go out regardless, and voila! A spontaneous date came up, Dinner, his treat, candles, beautiful garden by a pool. Started to rain, walked me to my car we hugged. I thought the night ended. But hold on. It didn't—??

After I took off he asked me to stop my car . Came out of his car in the rain, stood next to mine. Opened the window to find him saying "I guess I'm gonna fall for you. I just wanted to tell you that face to face. I know you get scared but please don't be.." And you bet it was the sweetest thing that ever happened in such a long time!!

Texting the same night was sweet and awesome. He talked about his feelings, which gave me the impression he's pretty open and not afraid to express himself. Neat.

2 days later no texting, it's like he vanished. He would come up every once in a while with a casual Hey how was your day babe and that's it. Random flirting here and there. I sometimes respond sometimes not. I'm confused with his actions. I feel uncomfortable and awkward...Whenever we hang out in a group of friends after that night, he deliberately ignores me!! weird!

He NEVER called since that night. He never actually called we always always text. And never asked me out or anything after that romantic night. It's as if he's acting like the romantic hero under the rain who's gonna make all your problems disappear and then he himself disappears. I'm not comfortable with this situation. how do i fix it? Do i ask him upfront what is he doing or what does he want? Cause he's making me uncomfortable? Knowing it's only been 3 weeks since this happened. Don't tell me he's just taking it slow. That's not taking it slow that's him not doing anything about it!

Posted by Angelousy

That's not taking it slow that's him not doing anything about it!

In your description, you mention him doing everything that has been done thus far ... while you sit back and await for him to put forth the effort.

Dinner - his treat, candles, garden, pool
Standing in rain to tell you he can see himself falling for you
Texting the same night - he talked to you about his feelings

Then after two days ....

Every once in a while, he asks you how you are
He randomly flirts here and there

^^^^^^^^^^^^^ that's all him doing all the work, while you are the one who does nothing about it

(you admit that sometimes you don't even respond to him ~ which is rude)

You put in caps the word, "never" to say that he never calls you, when you actually have fingers that know how to dial
He hasn't asked you out after that romantic night, when you actually learned how to talk when you were probably around two years old.


You are putting forth zero effort, then complaining because he doesn't do it all.

He showed you he is interested .... then put the ball in your court .... at which time you've got the awareness of an ironing board, so stands there with plug up ass.

Posted by Angelousy

It's as if he's acting like the romantic hero under the rain who's gonna make all your problems disappear ....

But, that ^^^^^^^^^^ part is very disturbing.

For him to profess (romantically) how he feels about you in the rain isn't wierd because you two have known each other for a year, even if you hadn't progressed into a relationship at that point.

But, what is wierd is that once a guy tells you they like you ..... your mind thinks that him liking you will make all of your problems disappear .. as if, you have zero accountibility of your problems and so will wait for a guy to choose you so you can dump all your problems onto him.


Seriously .... what other reason was there for you to say that?


Him being romantic means he's being romantic .. it doesn't mean he's trying to be YOUR personal hero in rescuing you from yourself.



wtf? Seems like ever since Dec 21, people are getting more fucked up

Posted by P-Angel

Posted by Angelousy

It's as if he's acting like the romantic hero under the rain who's gonna make all your problems disappear ....

But, that ^^^^^^^^^^ part is very disturbing.

For him to profess (romantically) how he feels about you in the rain isn't wierd because you two have known each other for a year, even if you hadn't progressed into a relationship at that point.

But, what is wierd is that once a guy tells you they like you ..... your mind thinks that him liking you will make all of your problems disappear .. as if, you have zero accountibility of your problems and so will wait for a guy to choose you so you can dump all your problems onto him.


Seriously .... what other reason was there for you to say that?


Him being romantic means he's being romantic .. it doesn't mean he's trying to be YOUR personal hero in rescuing you from yourself.



wtf? Seems like ever since Dec 21, people are getting more fucked up

click to expand

Thank you P-Angel for being upfront and blunt. I might need that sometimes.

I just wanna clarify that it was just a "figure of speech" I used to describe what he might be doing in his own mindset.
And also I promised myself I would never be this kind of girl who "dumps" her problems on her man cause honestly I can deal with my own problems pretty well..So your words are like a reminder. Thank you!

I've had my share of relationships that aren't so awesome at all. And ended up in the past year reading books about relationships in which I thought I might find an answer to why things end up so messed up, and I think these books might have fucked me up a bit more. I'm a very giving loving person by nature and all I want is for someone to feel the same way and do the same things I would do, without mind games or running in circles. But it seems like this has become the norm for guys to play around. I always get the demon that any guy who's approaching me could be playing around. Yes I get scared and I don't wanna get hurt so this is why I think I'm holding back and wanna make sure he does the work in the beginning to prove that he's sincere.

I just thought I'd share a hint of my personal story, you might understand where I come from, you might not...I'm not waiting for a guy to "save me" though I do really wanna fall in lo

Posted by P-Angel

Posted by Angelousy

That's not taking it slow that's him not doing anything about it!

In your description, you mention him doing everything that has been done thus far ... while you sit back and await for him to put forth the effort.

Dinner - his treat, candles, garden, pool
Standing in rain to tell you he can see himself falling for you
Texting the same night - he talked to you about his feelings

Then after two days ....

Every once in a while, he asks you how you are
He randomly flirts here and there

^^^^^^^^^^^^^ that's all him doing all the work, while you are the one who does nothing about it

(you admit that sometimes you don't even respond to him ~ which is rude)

You put in caps the word, "never" to say that he never calls you, when you actually have fingers that know how to dial
He hasn't asked you out after that romantic night, when you actually learned how to talk when you were probably around two years old.


You are putting forth zero effort, then complaining because he doesn't do it all.

He showed you he is interested .... then put the ball in your court .... at which time you've got the awareness of an ironing board, so stands there with plug up ass.

click to expand

Well...You have a point here, a valid one.

Because just yesterday I decided to text and we had a lovely conversation over the phone afterwards, and he ended up asking me out again, we haven't set a date yet cause he's away till Sunday but we'll work it out 🙂

Thank you =)

Posted by natashabakovic24
hmmm thats weird, to be honest, i think if he was interested he defiently would have kept in contact and wouldnt ignore you! i have had a virgo boyfriend for the last 1.5 years and at the begining he was soo sweet all the time, he was a bit open to some things, but virgos are usually more closed off and dont display their emotions much cause they like to give the impression that they are calm and collected. maybe you could try and ask him whats up and why he hasnt been talking to you, but yeah. good luck

It's actually true he gives the impression of "I'm calm and in control" yet a week ago he blacked out cause he overworks himself too much and travels a lot 😢

Maybe he's really feeling you. Sometimes I freak out a bit when I'm really into someone & may seem aloof for a few days, but I just need to re-group, ya know...gather my thoughts & eventually I come around. Just don't read so much into it. Relax, flow with it & let nature lead.

Oh btw, I WOULD NOT ignore the guy if he'd reach out to me. I definately would answer.

I don't ignore him

I meant that sometimes I don't respond to the flirting not his messages 🙂

No, no. I was referring to him ignoring you.

Meaning if it were me & you were reaching out to me, I wouldn't ignore you. But that's only when I'm interested in someone. If I'm not that interested in the person...you get where I'm going.

We talked about it again and he said he's waiting for my greenlight cause he doesn't wanna push me away, not sure if what i needed was space or time he said, so he didnt wanna push