believer
@believer
16 Years
Comments: 0 · Posts: 12 · Topics: 2
Everything is falling apart
Posted by cappy~go~luckyPosted by believer
he also seemed to go offline whenever I go on.
He's so busy sorting out his life but you keep catching him online and then he leaves as soon as you appear. Take anything he says with a pinch of salt & you will avoid being strung along in by someone you want as more than a friend.click to expand
This is what I though initially that he is way too busy, but he appears to have time to somewhat socialize with friends and going out as well.
Posted by Let*It*Be
"He pulled the disappearance act on me after a date which went quite well during revision period for the exams, he did return the 2 msgs I sent but just seems to avoid extended conversation, he also seemed to go offline whenever I go on."
How long have you been dating the Virgo? (how many dates?)
3 dates in about a month?
Posted by cappy~go~lucky
Well that speaks for itself. He's lying to you. I know you want to believe his words, but you know the facts speak for themselves. I guess whether you stay friends depends on whether you want to be friends with someone who deceives you about something so important. Men who do this are cowardly.
Thank you for your reply...so you think that he is really just using his problems as an excuse...that he is too scared to say the truth, which might be "I just don't think you are right for me/I'm not ready for commitment." kind of thing?
Thanx so much people, you've definitely helped me sorting out this whole thing, I guess I just need a few weeks to deal with my emotions and perhaps hurt ego. It is definitely best to leave this guy alone and never think about him again. I will try my best to do that and hopefully, within a few weeks time I'd feel better, right now I feel a little hurt because I was stubborn and semi ignored the hints that he gave like close ended responses and his attempts at avoiding me.
Even his friend suggested that perhaps he is only interested in the chase, because initially I did not show any interest in him. I feel like a prey and I've learnt my lesson, I don't think I would ever so easily let a guy know my feelings and agree to go out with them again. It might sound a little harsh and extreme, but it just appears that regardless of what sign they are they all like the chase, and the longer it is, the more they convince themselves that they like the girl.
Learnt my lesson after a bruised ego and slightly prickled heart.
Even his friend suggested that perhaps he is only interested in the chase, because initially I did not show any interest in him. I feel like a prey and I've learnt my lesson, I don't think I would ever so easily let a guy know my feelings and agree to go out with them again. It might sound a little harsh and extreme, but it just appears that regardless of what sign they are they all like the chase, and the longer it is, the more they convince themselves that they like the girl.
Learnt my lesson after a bruised ego and slightly prickled heart.
"He pulled the disappearance act on me after a date which went quite well during revision period for the exams, he did return the 2 msgs I sent but just seems to avoid extended conversation, he also seemed to go offline whenever I go on."
this ^^^^ is THE virgo.
he analized you.. and it seems that he just want to be friends.
"life isn't really working out for me atm, everything is falling apart, sorry I haven't had a chance to talk to you, yeah i think it will be better to just stay as friends. I really can't think about a relationship right now."
he says right there ^^^ that he just wants to be friends.
now I wonder... If you didn't text him, would he ever tell you this? or just be gone for good without lettin you know that he broke-up with you?
like.... if you've waited for him, would the result be the same as if you've chased and texted him?
any virgo can answer these questions ^^^ ?
this ^^^^ is THE virgo.
he analized you.. and it seems that he just want to be friends.
"life isn't really working out for me atm, everything is falling apart, sorry I haven't had a chance to talk to you, yeah i think it will be better to just stay as friends. I really can't think about a relationship right now."
he says right there ^^^ that he just wants to be friends.
now I wonder... If you didn't text him, would he ever tell you this? or just be gone for good without lettin you know that he broke-up with you?
like.... if you've waited for him, would the result be the same as if you've chased and texted him?
any virgo can answer these questions ^^^ ?
Wow, CGL .. are you speaking from experience, or just being vengeful because a Virgo in here pissed you off and now you are going to behave exactly as you preached against? Because I don't really recall you ever talking about your personal Virgo experiences before.
Don't be a hypocrite now ... it will negate every point you've attempted to make of late.
believer .. here's the thing ... Virgos freak out a tad when feelings are involved. When you two went on those couple dates, he knew that your feelings for him moved closer towards him. So long as it was just friends, this wasn't scary.
Virgos are really very emotionally immature when it comes to nurturing their partners feelings .. maybe immature isn't the right word to use. They are so detached from their intimate emotions, for analyzing purposes, that when a person begins to feel for them on a deep level, and the Virgo realizes this ... it freaks them out a little because all this time, their feelings for you and how they percieve your feelings of them have been sitting in a lab, of sorts, for dissection.
A date, ok sure .... then when it actually happens, reality hits them .... oh shit, something is moving here, and these feelings are on a table instead of inside so I can feel them .. fuck. Now what do I do?
PANIC
Don't be a hypocrite now ... it will negate every point you've attempted to make of late.
believer .. here's the thing ... Virgos freak out a tad when feelings are involved. When you two went on those couple dates, he knew that your feelings for him moved closer towards him. So long as it was just friends, this wasn't scary.
Virgos are really very emotionally immature when it comes to nurturing their partners feelings .. maybe immature isn't the right word to use. They are so detached from their intimate emotions, for analyzing purposes, that when a person begins to feel for them on a deep level, and the Virgo realizes this ... it freaks them out a little because all this time, their feelings for you and how they percieve your feelings of them have been sitting in a lab, of sorts, for dissection.
A date, ok sure .... then when it actually happens, reality hits them .... oh shit, something is moving here, and these feelings are on a table instead of inside so I can feel them .. fuck. Now what do I do?
PANIC
You know what I've had advice from lots of folk on here including P angel and as much as its harsh, I'll tell you now Virgo's don't mess about! I'm a Virgo myself and I should know better and its all right, when we like you we like you and you will know about it. There is no confusion.
From what I've garnered from personal experience with dating virgos and from my own ways we really don't like letting folk down so we play silly buggers and its messes around with heads its not good. We might think your a real cool person as a friend....but anything else is a no so you get the nonsense. Which is so unfair and the more I read this board the more I realise so I'm going to make a positive effort to not do that anymore its infuriating!
I personally hate when folk bear their heart as I have no clue what to do with it unless I'm feeling the same thing then its game! I'm actually dating a Virgo boy myself and its cool. 50/50 He gets in touch and we arrange time together or I get in touch and we arrange time together no messing about! no pulling away its all straightforward. And let me tell you this guy is recovering from cancer so if anyone has an excuse for not getting in touch he's the one. If he's feeling tired and can't be doing with calling then he will text or email to say goodnight and he'll speak to me when he's up to it which is usually the next day!
I'm with P on this though she has it in a nut shell to a point xx
From what I've garnered from personal experience with dating virgos and from my own ways we really don't like letting folk down so we play silly buggers and its messes around with heads its not good. We might think your a real cool person as a friend....but anything else is a no so you get the nonsense. Which is so unfair and the more I read this board the more I realise so I'm going to make a positive effort to not do that anymore its infuriating!
I personally hate when folk bear their heart as I have no clue what to do with it unless I'm feeling the same thing then its game! I'm actually dating a Virgo boy myself and its cool. 50/50 He gets in touch and we arrange time together or I get in touch and we arrange time together no messing about! no pulling away its all straightforward. And let me tell you this guy is recovering from cancer so if anyone has an excuse for not getting in touch he's the one. If he's feeling tired and can't be doing with calling then he will text or email to say goodnight and he'll speak to me when he's up to it which is usually the next day!
I'm with P on this though she has it in a nut shell to a point xx
Imagination, I happen to find the questions you asked very interesting as well and it is something I would like to find out. If I waited would he have responded differently or perhaps just avoided confrontation altogether? P-angel thank you for the analysis, you are most likely right, and considering that this guy is a pretty unevolved Virgo who had little dating experience and never had a serious relationship before.
The last date we went on we ended up going clubbing where we move quite quickly from having never held eachothers hand (I know it sounds juvenile) to dancing intimately, he held me close and brushed his hand through my hair. (both under the influence of a little alcohol) he was obviously attracted to me, even steered me away from guys that tried to hit on me, but I know that one being in a club and two being tipsy doesn't really make anything he does meaningful, I understand that I might have read all the signs wrong when I say that the last datewent smoothly.
If there is one thing I can think of that might have scared him of is probably when I felt really unbalanced and I kind of latched onto him accidently and stayed that way for several seconds to steady myself...he might have found it overwhelming or perhaps thought of me as near desperate, he certainly seemed a little freaked out afterwards lol.
The last date we went on we ended up going clubbing where we move quite quickly from having never held eachothers hand (I know it sounds juvenile) to dancing intimately, he held me close and brushed his hand through my hair. (both under the influence of a little alcohol) he was obviously attracted to me, even steered me away from guys that tried to hit on me, but I know that one being in a club and two being tipsy doesn't really make anything he does meaningful, I understand that I might have read all the signs wrong when I say that the last datewent smoothly.
If there is one thing I can think of that might have scared him of is probably when I felt really unbalanced and I kind of latched onto him accidently and stayed that way for several seconds to steady myself...he might have found it overwhelming or perhaps thought of me as near desperate, he certainly seemed a little freaked out afterwards lol.
Posted by P-Angel
Wow, CGL .. are you speaking from experience, or just being vengeful because a Virgo in here pissed you off and now you are going to behave exactly as you preached against? Because I don't really recall you ever talking about your personal Virgo experiences before.
Don't be a hypocrite now ... it will negate every point you've attempted to make of late.
Sorry for digging this one out of the vaults but I had to go away for a self imposed exile and my original response was deleted too quick.
the original response was something along the lines of "good to know how you feel about me P angel". But Ive since been skimming the threads every now and again, mainly strings amusing quote box thread and Ive realised P angel is part normal poster and part troll. The above comment was particularly troll-like provocation. It's a pity P because I liked you well enough when others were knocking you, but your provoking me in this way has made me lose that respect.
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He pulled the disappearance act on me after a date which went quite well during revision period for the exams, he did return the 2 msgs I sent but just seems to avoid extended conversation, he also seemed to go offline whenever I go on. This continued for three weeks, initially I didn't panic after reading all your previous posts, gave him time to sort out his problems which I thought could be emotional or personal.
Today I asked gently through a txt whether he was avoiding me, and he replied that 'life isn't really working out for me atm, everything is falling apart, sorry I haven't had a chance to talk to you, yeah i think it will be better to just stay as friends. I really can't think about a relationship right now.' It turned out that he was failing multiple courses due to many reasons, and he asked if we are still friends.
I reassured him that I would love to still stay friends with him. Now I understand that he is a guy before he is a virgo and he could possibly be using this as an excuse to end it all as he may have found me unsuitable or not perfect enough for his liking.
But I was wondering, in this situation, is this virgo genuinely ending it due to personal problems or is he just not interested any more...should I still keep my hopes up? Or should I forget about him completely? He is such a sweet guy and I'm extremely attracted to him. If its genuinely because of the personal hardship he is going through...I wouldn't want to give up on him.
Could someone give advice? Thanx in advance! Sorry for the long post btw.