Here we go....night with Player Virgo

I am in Chicago right now...spend the night with Rich, he dorve me to the airport this morning. A little discouraging last night. He told me to come to the bar and we will go from there and he will drive me in the AM....I made sure I looked HOT. He has been in Florida supposedly visitng his parents for Easter all week. Said between the NY trip and the Florida trip, he drank way too much...whatever. So before we get hot and heavy...I bring up "the talk" ...the fact that I do not become intimate with someone easily, and we did very soon and then I do not hear form him for weeks. the fact he does not call makes me feel disprespected. Not judgemental/not attacting but expressing my feelings. He said :

" I told you in the beginning I am not good at relationhsips and not good at calling...thats just the way I am"

I told him I wasnt looking for a relationship...just respect as a woman." Then I asked him if he was sleeping with other woman.

..the answer "yes am I sleeping with someone else" I said I need to kow that for my own protection" He said he totally respected that and understood. I turned my back to him to think for a mommentto think and didnt say a word for one minute. He said "Do you want me to leave now? You want me to go home?"

I thought for a moment and then just said "No "...and jumped on his bones.... proceeded to have sex....2x last night then again this morning.And whats with the fact he closes his eyes when we have sex— Maybe thinking about the other girl? He still has not given me an orgasm because I cannot be that confortable w/ him. I explained I date others but choose to be intimate with only one person....and he sure had tried.

Very awkward this morning and he started to get VERY Critical of me. Started last night:."your underwear is sticking out and everyone at the bar can see" ( my pants were low) This morning He was so quiet(usually is inthe AM) that I started mentioning things we had already talked about the night before (maybe I had to much to drink or was just trying to drum up conversation)
"Yes, Courtney, you ALREADY told me that last night". Then in the car he said "Wow, I feel bad for the person sitting on the plane next to you...you loaded on the perfume" I told him I JUST got out of the shower and just put it on ...shy are you being so critical—" he said "well, you put on too much"

The ride to the airport was very quiet...he dropped me off said "Have a safe flight and call me when you get back" and kissed me on the CHEEK.

I decided to take this as it is....casual sex...but why did he get so critical all of a sudden? because I touched a nerve? Becasue I called him out on it?

I dont mind the casualness of it all right now...as its still new. But those who say Virgo men sleep w/ one woman at a time is BS!!!

Sounds like he was irritated, probably because you called him on it. Men like that don't understand women and are not interested in understanding. They feel annoyed if they think you're rubbing something to their face when they haven't consciously strung you along.

Men think we're stupid for falling for idiots but they don't understand that we aRe more emotional and that we do develop feelings more easily. If the guy we like acts even slightly interested why should we be suspicious? Ok we should but our little hearts are already thumping at the sight of them 🙂 *sigh* Most men don't know that on some level they are misleading us...

Somehow it has to do with our upbringing. Men don't want to be/aren't emotional, makes them uncomfortable... they wave it off, critisize, and the only thing they aim to understand is how to learn the art of getting their way. Women on the other hand, have a very different response and much to our disadvantage (with SOME men) we seek to be understanding and patient which can lead us to see something that isn't there in them or a relationship.

Lots of unfortunate mismatches if we don't keep our guards up since the beginning.

Anywho... about his player, he sucks. I don't understand why men need several bedmates...? Men out there, why is that? Let me guess, good for the fat ego... *rolls eyes

Yes, Sophie......you have two options as everyone above is telling you...you accept what Mr. Virgo is telling you - in other words - it's sex for sex sake - nothing more, nothing less! That is fair enough if that's what YOU want it to be.

Or perhaps, step back from the passion fires and ask yourself......do you really want to be second to anyone else in any department of your life— - If the answer is no, then you gotta walk away. Knowing us girlies....that "other woman" is now gonna be swirling round your head big time and she's gonna melt that brain of yours!!....How do you know if he is really thinking of her when he's with you— Has she a better body than you— What's her friggin' name— Is she prettier more beautiful than you— These are the thoughts that I know will enter your pretty head from now on.....

Oh and by the way, I can't help thinking Mr. Virgo needs to be brought down a peg or two:-) in his bedroom techniques!!....if you want to tweak that ego of his down, next time you're in bed in afterglow!!!!- say to him....."Hmmmm Mister, you might have two lovers!!!.....but you sure as hell ain't succeeded in making this one cum yet!!!

Anyway, whatever you decide, I wish you happiness....

Alana x

"How do you know if he is really thinking of her when he's with you—"

Yeah, Alana has a point here.

> " I told you in the beginning I am not good at relationhsips and not good at calling...thats just the way I am"

Believe him. He is being honest.

> "yes am I sleeping with someone else" .... proceeded to have sex

Sophie ... why did you do that? You have set up an situation where he is now tempted to see how far he can push you. He now thinks he can openly disrespect you because he told you he is sleeping around yet you still slept with him.

Also, you told him he doesn't call and it makes you feel bad ... yet you still slept with him. He isn't going to listen to what you say ... men in general don't work that way ... he is going to listen to what you do.

Your actions are saying no matter what you do or who you do ... you are still so hot and awesome ... I am going to have sex with you. You are no longer a challenge and unfortunetly, no longer someone he will respect as a long-term partner.

> But those who say Virgo men sleep w/ one woman at a time is BS!!!

I could have told you that! Yes. Virgo men can be cheats and players. It is because they have weak egos and need validation from women. Some Virgo men consider manliness to be defined by how well they do with the ladies.

"I thought for a moment and then just said "No "...and jumped on his bones.... proceeded to have sex....2x last night then again this morning."

I see you don't lose your chance to have some fun, eh?

Sophie68, I had this exact problem with a Gemini workmate last year. He came on really strong, asked me out, we went out for a few dates, and because I didn't want to seem to be coming on too strong, I didn't ask him about the commitment thing till about 3 dates in. We got on SO well, had a real connection, especially in our conversations and I thought he was the sexiest man I'd ever seen. And then I ask him if he's seeing anyone else. His reply was yes, not exactly, but I do sleep with a female friend if I feel like it. I was obviously put out, which I think is a normal reaction!!! I still decided to sleep with him, after he had told me, because I wanted to (and I was careful, so no worries about diseases). I was grateful that he had been honest with me, but he could have said something at the start. I slept with him 3 times and then played it cool cos I'd got him out of my system. Then not long after I met a lovely Virgo guy, who I was honest with straight away and told him that I wasn't interested in being one of many and he was cool with that. And now the Gem guy can't seem to stay away ha ha!!! It's too funny for words really, considering it was him who didn't want anything monogamous and now he appears to have changed his mind. If I were you I'd sleep with him if that's all you want, but if not then stay away. Don't be nasty about it, let him think it hasn't bothered you at all, and then he'll probably wonder what's wrong with him for you to not bother with him!

You know what...I am so much better than to be treated this way.

I was on my flight lasy night and the guy to me started to chat, nice guy,...told him I was single, etc. He said " You are a rockstar....how could you not find a good guy—"

So why I am sitting here dealing with this crap?

I am going out w/ 10 of my old co-workers tonight so that should be fun. He is not as hot as he thinks he is and he sucks in the romance department in bed so...whatever..

I will still continue my routine of going with my friends to his bar, say "Hey, how are you" and walk away....I have no time for this BS


Ce la Vie !!!!!! :-)

sophie68:

You deserve betther than that. I also was with a Virgo male but he wasn't sleeping with anyone else. He may be now but who knows. I know our heads tell us to get out and get away but our emotions just mess with us because there is no definate answer from the Virgo male to tell us we are done. They always leave you hanging and feeling stumped like what happened. My Virgo male acts like he is a total flirt but in reality he flirts with women that have boyfriends that he knows. I think he does it to make me jealous which, I don't usually get. Don't let him treat you like you are just one of his girls that he can sleep with anytime he wants too. Us women have our emotions attached to sex and men don't so it is easier for them. As for the bedroom thing I know I had to initate most of it otherwise I wouldn't get any either and that would be a shame. Mine used to buy me roses and love to cuddle with me but when they poof for no reason that we know of it sucks. I hope you got the number for the guy on the plane.

Very much liking your attitude now Sophie:-) - that's more like it!!!
Heeeeeeeeeeeeey, Cancerbuddy, so nice to hear you are still "buddying" on the board:-)
Yeah, I am still addicted to the virgo board:-)!!!! - and virgo-boy is still "addicted" to me!!!!.........sure t'is only to be expected:-) - if you've been "alana-ed"!, then no-one else can compare EVER:-)!!! Oh my, my ego is so big today:-)!!!

A x

Sophie,

He is a jerk, that you would pour out your heart to him, he tells you he doesn't want anything serious, but he still sleeps with you anyway and then treats you like dirt afterwards. If he was a nice guy he would have acknowledged that you wanted more and got a conscience, told you that you were a beautiful girl that deserves better than what he can offer at the moment and sent you home. Not to mention that he is also sleeping with the other girl and probably telling her that he doesn't want anything serious with her either and treating her the same way. He is really selfish to play with people like that. I don't know how he sleeps at night.

Remember that saying that goes something like
Cross me once shame on you, Cross me twice shame on me. Don't ever let yourself say Shame on me. Don't fool yourself that you just want a casual sex thing with this guy. Learn a lesson here and Move on!!

CB: DOn't waste your precious sweet time, and go get yourself a trustworhty, kind and caring cancer man.

Man, love that confidence of the cancer men lol

It's true virgo are freaken players, but I think it's just a phrase they will outgrow sooner or later, that's all. Give them time and they will be in a different stage(but still lol) One of my virgo ex-coworker was trying to hook up with me but our mutual friend told me he was a player. Soon enough I found out that he was in the phrase of breaking up with his now-ex-gf so I wasn't interested in him. I've know him for almost 5 years now. But now he's looking to settle down and he then realized that I was the one he wanted to be with....well, knowing his past "player attitude" I chose my lovely cancer man over a virgo. It's hard to win a Taurus's heart once he's proven himself not trustworthy.