I went on a date with a Virgo chick but......

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iksentricbeauty
@iksentricbeauty
14 Years

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Hey guys! I had recently went on a date with a Virgo and it went really well. We have been talking on and off for a few months but we finally had time for eachother to meet up for a date. It was at a local bar and we exchanged information about ourselves to one another and we were very flirty too lol. She told me that I probably wouldn't be able to keep up with her and that she is a very demanding type of chick. I'm always up for a challenge though and I tend to adapt to different personalities and attitudes (I'm an Aquarius chick) as well as being very open minded. She asked me to go out with her the next day but I told her I couldn't because I had plans early on that day that I couldn't break (her reaction to that wasn't too receptive but it was something I really couldn't get out of). After a few drinks (I wasn't tipsy or drunk at all and neither was she, at least i didn't think so lol) we took a walk outside and ended up holding hands and becoming more intimate with eachother. There was no sex involved that night, just a lot of kissing and handling of eachother. When it was time for me to go we made out some more and she stopped and was like "What am I doing?! I don't kiss on the first date ever!" but then just continued on (I thought that was kind of random lol). Before I left she expressed to me how she wanted to see me again soon, really soon and I agreed I wanted to also. I really like this girl and I want to see her again and get to know her more in person rather than just through text messages and such. After that night she's been really stand offish and what seems to be the "chasing" thing going on. I've texted her a few times after that night and she'd answer but in a short way you know? She hasn't really hit me back up either and I don't want to be the one to keep texting her. I don't want to come off strong and scare her away, I really do want to see her again/get to know her even more. What should I do? Wait for her to text me back? Give her a call to see whats up? From what I know is that Virgos take a while to commit but I don't expect a relationship right away in this situation. I just want to see her again and have that connection that we had that night. Advice? (sorry this was long)
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iksentricbeauty
@iksentricbeauty
14 Years

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@Virgie..SHe told me she likes to travel when she can, she likes working and working toward her personal goals..she also told me the type of women she likes (which she pretty much described me lol but idk if she was just doing that to be flirtatious)..the text messaging is very much different than the way she is in person..in the texts she seems distant and not willing to talk much? at least thats how i feel because there were many times where she just wouldn't answer my messages or end the convo with no response from her (and i refuse to keep texting cuz i don't wana bother her). when we hung out in person she was very outgoing and flirty and wanted to get to know me more/see me again. how can we see each other again if shes distant when texting? i want to call her up but would that be too much?
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CLCNY30
@CLCNY30
16 Years1,000+ Posts

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Lol. Sounds like you've got yourself one of those "unevolved" Virgo chicks. Please see thread floating around beneath this one.

She sounds childish--you sure she's worth the headache?

If a Virgo's playing games, it's a bad sign. We like to be straightforward, and don't want games played with us, so we do our damndest not to play them with others.

How old are you two, if you don't mind me asking? If you're fairly young, that could be the reason why she's acting so immature...
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iksentricbeauty
@iksentricbeauty
14 Years

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@Virgie no problem thanks for the response! @CLCNY, I guess I'm just very picky with who I'm interested in and once I find someone I click with I really want to get to know that person more..Very rarely do I like someone on a more intimate level so when I do I try to really go for it..is she worth the headache? eh hard to tell anymore with the way she's been acting but I usually give the benefit of the doubt..we are both 22 years old..maybe she just knows the right things to say in person to get me caught up in her :\
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CLCNY30
@CLCNY30
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Well, only you know what you should do. You're telling us one side of the story, and there are 3: yours, hers, and the truth lying somewhere in between.

The best thing to do, for both your sakes, would be to be direct with questioning. Tell her how she's coming off, and the impression it's giving you/how it's making you feel. From what you've described, she sounds ubersensitive, so I'm sure she won't welcome it, but it's better than YOU hurting from something she may be doing to you uknowingly, know what I mean?

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RealTalk
@RealTalk
14 Years1,000+ Posts

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Posted by CLCNY30
Lol. Sounds like you've got yourself one of those "unevolved" Virgo chicks. Please see thread floating around beneath this one.

She sounds childish--you sure she's worth the headache?

If a Virgo's playing games, it's a bad sign. We like to be straightforward, and don't want games played with us, so we do our damndest not to play them with others.

How old are you two, if you don't mind me asking? If you're fairly young, that could be the reason why she's acting so immature...



That's true but sometimes I do that too, not playing games though. I respond to texts but sometimes I cut the convo short and don't text again for a while. When I am doing that though, it's usually because I'm not really interested in the person to take things further, and I end up just telling them I'd rather be friends.
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RealTalk
@RealTalk
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Posted by iksentricbeauty
I'm pretty sure I made it seem that I was interested in her when I texted her saying I wanted to see her again and to make plans..but she would just kinda blow me off



Sorry to say but maybe she's "just not that into you". I do things like that when I'm not that interested. I had a date with a guy that was great. Good convo, made me laugh & seemed to be a really nice guy...but I didn't feel any chemistry with him at all, and that's important (to me). But she may be into you and playing games like C stated because we are usually straight forward. I believe you should wait a little longer to see if she will call or text, but if you want to really feel the need to call her to see what's up, do it, and if she seems shady then you'll know. Good luck! 😉
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RealTalk
@RealTalk
14 Years1,000+ Posts

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Posted by CLCNY30
Yeah I understand RT--like I said, questions need to be asked. She may not even realize she's doing it, and don't be put off by her sudden defensiveness...we tend to do that when we know we're wrong for acting a certain way or saying a certain thing. If that defensiveness persists, however, back off and move on, because yes--you're better off in the long run.



Yeah...you're right.
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iksentricbeauty
@iksentricbeauty
14 Years

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Posted by RealTalk
Posted by iksentricbeauty
I'm pretty sure I made it seem that I was interested in her when I texted her saying I wanted to see her again and to make plans..but she would just kinda blow me off



Sorry to say but maybe she's "just not that into you". I do things like that when I'm not that interested. I had a date with a guy that was great. Good convo, made me laugh & seemed to be a really nice guy...but I didn't feel any chemistry with him at all, and that's important (to me). But she may be into you and playing games like C stated because we are usually straight forward. I believe you should wait a little longer to see if she will call or text, but if you want to really feel the need to call her to see what's up, do it, and if she seems shady then you'll know. Good luck! 😉
click to expand




If i don't hear from her by the end of this week I'll contact her again to see what's really going on. I would rather have her tell me she's not interested straight up than not talk to me at all. If she wasn't interested why would she tell me she wants to see me again really soon? Ugh and another thing that happend when I asked her to hang out during the day a few days after that night she said that she wished she could but maybe at night..I didn't hear from her after that lol FML. I over analyze things aka an aquarius trait that tends to drive me nuts hahhaha
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RealTalk
@RealTalk
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Posted by iksentricbeauty
Posted by RealTalk
Posted by iksentricbeauty
I'm pretty sure I made it seem that I was interested in her when I texted her saying I wanted to see her again and to make plans..but she would just kinda blow me off



Sorry to say but maybe she's "just not that into you". I do things like that when I'm not that interested. I had a date with a guy that was great. Good convo, made me laugh & seemed to be a really nice guy...but I didn't feel any chemistry with him at all, and that's important (to me). But she may be into you and playing games like C stated because we are usually straight forward. I believe you should wait a little longer to see if she will call or text, but if you want to really feel the need to call her to see what's up, do it, and if she seems shady then you'll know. Good luck! 😉



If i don't hear from her by the end of this week I'll contact her again to see what's really going on. I would rather have her tell me she's not interested straight up than not talk to me at all. If she wasn't interested why would she tell me she wants to see me again really soon? Ugh and another thing that happend when I asked her to hang out during the day a few days after that night she said that she wished she could but maybe at night..I didn't hear from her after that lol FML. I over analyze things aka an aquarius trait that tends to drive me nuts hahhaha
click to expand




She only wants to chill at night? Hell, that sounds suspect to me, but on the other hand she could be working during the day or she just may be really busy. Yeah...I mean if she doesn't call you, just call her, but do not chase. If you guys still don't chill again, then I wouldn't contact her anymore. She would then have to initiate.
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MissV123
@MissV123
14 Years

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Posted by iksentricbeauty
@RealTalk yeah she is pretty busy I guess, she does work..I'm gona give it more time then call her and see what happens..



hey, i've been reading your post and wanted to jump for a bit since i dated some aquas in the past and some of my best friends are aquas as well. it's hard to type right now, because the lights in my room are off and my room is big so i can't get up...i'm really cozy already :p, but i'll try to write again later.

seems to me that you are in the questionable spot.

sometimes that can happen to me because i did something out of my plans or because i need more time to sort through some details i have yet to evaluate before i move to the a new step.

she is attracted to you. she just needs something time to figure out.

i would try to give her a call(you have and had good reasons to do that, as she already said she would like to see you again. she would remember that. you would have known of her interest or lack of faster that way), i don't think it would have been too forward at all considering what you shared that night and what was said on her part (whereas she was ready for it or not).

it's not what you use to communicate is when you do it and how you it.

the attraction was there and given my personal experience with aquas, there is a good mental connection between us and you guys. but of course other factors play in so i would have to know a bit more.

at the moment there is just something else keeping her busy mentally and/or maybe she doesn't know how to feel towards you completely yet. she could just be very nervous...since what happened that night wasn't something common for her or maybe she has other considerations to keep in mind related to her own values or other people.

keep us posted. and don't give up yet, it's way too soon. give it some time. call her when you can, don't leave a message if she doesnt answer the first time. and if she does contact you back or respond to a new message try to feel her vibe, if the conversation goes well, try to suggest something to do very casually...but only if the conversation seems to be heading that way. otherwise, she might need a bit more time.

missv
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iksentricbeauty
@iksentricbeauty
14 Years

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hey guys! so just an update on this sitch i had last month..she eventually did contact me a week-ish later after giving her some time...and we have been seeing eachother once a week for about a month now..we admitted to one another that we like eachother a lottt..she isn't seeing anyone else and neither am i..so my question to you virgos is, do you usually wait for the other person to ask to make things official? or do u virgos ask the person you like to be your bf/gf (make things official)..i really want to ask her to be my gf but i don't want to scare her away or get denied..should i wait a little longer and just keep going on dates for now?
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iksentricbeauty
@iksentricbeauty
14 Years

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updateee! so i haven't brought up that subject yet lol i don't think its time yet..for some reason i have this gut feeling that i should wait a little longer..i think she's starting to pull away again though..we had plans yesterday to go out and she didn't come through..ughhh i still want to see where this is going haha..everything was going well for a couple of weeks but now i feel like she is becoming distant again and i dont know why 😢
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iksentricbeauty
@iksentricbeauty
14 Years

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hey guys, its been about 3 months since i started posting about this virgal..we've been pretty much dating ever since..she's been more open about who she is and has told me that she really really likes me..she has expressed to me that she feels so comfortable around me and can "be herself" and that its weird..lol idk why its so weird for her? i really want to ask her to be my gf at this point but i still don't know if she is ready for it..not too sure how to bring it up to her on where we stand..she is not seeing anyone else but me (from what she's told me)..any thoughts on this? the push and pull thing isn't happening as much anymore..but i do feel like i'm always the one making the effort to go see her and make plans..and to be honest i'm kind of getting tired of being the one to go see her all the time..whenever i ask her to come over here she always makes an excuse..its exhausting lol..feedback would be great!
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iksentricbeauty
@iksentricbeauty
14 Years

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when we had dinner last week we did get into a conversation about our past relationships..at some point in the conversation she said to me that she doesn't mind dating because its more chill (she was talking in general, not specifically about us dating)..and if a relationship happens then it happens..i just don't know how to take these comments? it makes me want to delay the conversation of asking her thoughts on moving a step forward with us..
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RealTalk
@RealTalk
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Posted by iksentricbeauty
when we had dinner last week we did get into a conversation about our past relationships..at some point in the conversation she said to me that she doesn't mind dating because its more chill (she was talking in general, not specifically about us dating)..and if a relationship happens then it happens..i just don't know how to take these comments? it makes me want to delay the conversation of asking her thoughts on moving a step forward with us..



I believe she was inadvertently telling you that she would just like for things to transpire organically, and that you cannot force anything. If something is meant to be, it will & if it's not, there's nothing you could do about it. Just allow nature to take its course. She will definitely withdraw from you if she feels pressured.
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iksentricbeauty
@iksentricbeauty
14 Years

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another update on this sitchhh feedback is appreciated 🙂
This month makes it 4 months into dating eachother...we've been seeing eachother at least once or twice a week since we started dating..I honestly don't know how to feel at this point??_
This past Saturday I picked her up to go grab drinks and dinner and just have a casual, chill, night. I wanted to bring up the subject of taking things further but I had kept my attention on her the whole time she was talking. She's a lil chatterbox haha its kinda cute :p She would just talk about her future plans and such and I would give some feedback (we usually have great conversations in person). I didn't get a chance to bring up the topic but afterwards we sat by the water to relax some more. Now keep in mind I did not bring up anything the whole night in regards to our dating situation or relationship stuff. She started talking about classes and how she wants to focus on that (she is in grad school), then she flat out said —I don't want to be in a relationship right now, I can't do it with all thats goinngg on school etc..?? My heart literally dropped when she said that. I had no response, lots of things were running through my head that I couldn't get a word out. I'm terrible at expressing any of my emotions verbally, its not my forte at all. The only response I could give her is telling her that I don't want to lose her. She said that I won't lose her, then hugged me tightly.
I don't know what to think anymore, why would she date me for this long and not want anything more than that? Was she testing me to see how I would react? ugh, I'm just so confused on what to do now..I don't want to give up but whats the point in trying anymore if she doesn't want to take it to the next level? Her telling me that just came out of no where??_I have never pressured her into anything nor have i EVER brought up the topic of making things official??_feedback would be great once again..thanks!
.
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arafeandur
@arafeandur
13 Years

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Ok - a comment from a guy who is dating a Virgo - though they are all different, probably more so than any other sign.
Since you posted last year, you've probably already figured it out by now:

Virgos are exceedingly subtle. I'm an Aries with a lot of Aquarius in my chart, and I had a very similar sitch in the past. I had to pull my head out of the clouds and get down to ground level with her in order to be able to see wth was wrong.
The Answers are:

1) Your flat/house is nasty. Being there makes her feel like she needs to clean/organize it. Straighten up, make the place shine, lower the lights. 1 bad experience seeing your place in a 'normal' bachelor state will guarantee she will need to hear you've done some serious cleaning before she'll step foot back in it. Yeah, this means you actually *do* have to vacuum, dust, organize, sweep, mop, do the dishes etc. Tell her you got all June Cleaver on it and you want her opinion. She will show up like she popped out of a lantern - and you better bet she will find 100 things you missed. WRITE THESE THINGS DOWN. Then, clean them - right then. That will show that you're taking it seriously. Don't ask her opinion unless you plan to listen and put her suggestions into effect. Then, look at the result and say what you think - which will probably be "OMG yeah that looks way better."

2) "I don't want to be in a relationship right now." It sounds like she is dropping a hint that you should have asked her by now, and since you haven't, then she is going to tell you no before you even ask. Either that or she thinks she needs to be more of a challenge for you ("I never kiss on the first date!" remember?) and so she's trying to make you want to ask her by turning you down before you even ask. The Aqua tendency is to dream, dream, dream - and that can make you seem very disinterested or even unreliable and flighty. If she thinks you are unreliable, then you don't make the cut dude. You have to get your head out of the clouds and prove your reliability. Do what you say. Be early. Don't forget things that are important to her. Be creative.

3) School is important to her. It should be important to you too. This sounds like a pattern where she has told you what is important to her and is letting you know that she wants you to be supportive of her achieving her dreams. Instead it sounds like you responded with vague dreams. This girl has drive and is going places. Be part of that - not an obstacle.
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iksentricbeauty
@iksentricbeauty
14 Years

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Posted by arafeandur
Ok - a comment from a guy who is dating a Virgo - though they are all different, probably more so than any other sign.
Since you posted last year, you've probably already figured it out by now:

Virgos are exceedingly subtle. I'm an Aries with a lot of Aquarius in my chart, and I had a very similar sitch in the past. I had to pull my head out of the clouds and get down to ground level with her in order to be able to see wth was wrong.
The Answers are:

1) Your flat/house is nasty. Being there makes her feel like she needs to clean/organize it. Straighten up, make the place shine, lower the lights. 1 bad experience seeing your place in a 'normal' bachelor state will guarantee she will need to hear you've done some serious cleaning before she'll step foot back in it. Yeah, this means you actually *do* have to vacuum, dust, organize, sweep, mop, do the dishes etc. Tell her you got all June Cleaver on it and you want her opinion. She will show up like she popped out of a lantern - and you better bet she will find 100 things you missed. WRITE THESE THINGS DOWN. Then, clean them - right then. That will show that you're taking it seriously. Don't ask her opinion unless you plan to listen and put her suggestions into effect. Then, look at the result and say what you think - which will probably be "OMG yeah that looks way better."

2) "I don't want to be in a relationship right now." It sounds like she is dropping a hint that you should have asked her by now, and since you haven't, then she is going to tell you no before you even ask. Either that or she thinks she needs to be more of a challenge for you ("I never kiss on the first date!" remember?) and so she's trying to make you want to ask her by turning you down before you even ask. The Aqua tendency is to dream, dream, dream - and that can make you seem very disinterested or even unreliable and flighty. If she thinks you are unreliable, then you don't make the cut dude. You have to get your head out of the clouds and prove your reliability. Do what you say. Be early. Don't forget things that are important to her. Be creative.

3) School is important to her. It should be important to you too. This sounds like a pattern where she has told you what is important to her and is letting you know that she wants you to be supportive of her achieving her dreams. Instead it sounds like you responded with vague dreams. This
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iksentricbeauty
@iksentricbeauty
14 Years

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ahh my response wasn't added to the last post...

lol, she has been to my house only once thus far..my house/room is actually not nasty..its beyond organized and cozy so no i do not think thats one of the issues..

8 months in dating this girl..shes currently being cold and pulling away..at this point i'm pretty much tired and worn out from putting all the effort and it not being reciprocated on her part..i do wonder whats going on with her but not as much as i used to months ago lol..nowadays its a go with the flow attitude and i'm done with trying to impress this virgal..so whatever happens happens haha
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JazSexyAzz
@JazSexyAzz
13 YearsVirgo

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Nooooo don't give uppp!!!
In order to understand a virgo yu must understand an aquarius [yourself] 1st
We act alike in so many ways yu jus have to sit back analyze & understand. Be honest your virgo sounds lik my aquarius & yu sound like me [virgo] lol but before I get into the advice thing, is the relationship still going on? If not yu can ALWAYS get her back. We have this undeniable attraction to aquarius' and we can't get yu guys out of our heads.