I'm frustrated w/ My Virgo...

He chastised me for doing something nice for him - I shouldn't have done it because he didn't ask it of me he said. He was outright mad. His anger brought tears to my eyes. I'm miffed! I did it because I care and wanted to. Why can't he just appreciate that?!?

My Gem moon is probably why I'm overreacting. pfft

But, I'm NOT over reacting!!!!!!!!!!!! HUMPH

damn men!

As the sign of service, we don't really expect these things. We'll do things for you without asking because it's what we do, but if you want to do something for us, we can either see it as one of two things: "this is really sweet of you," or "wtf? I didn't ask you to just step into my life and mess around without my permission." Did your virgo have to get mad, no, but he probably didn't expect it, and when we don't expect things, it sort of just throws us for a loop. I also think you're overreacting. Just talk to him when you calm down.

If ya all must know, I paid money on his cell phone bill while I was in getting a new phone...

He asked earlier this week if I would pay it when I was in, but their system was down so I didn't even get through the front door... I couldn't reach him today when I was in buying a new phone so i went ahead and put $ 20 on his acct.

Yeah, I can see why he'd be angry. What you did was WAY nice, but this isn't just a virgo thing, it's a male thing too. You basically said, "oh, you can't handle this yourself, so I'm going to do it for you." Virgos DO NOT like it when someone takes care of their business without knowledge first. Virgos are independent and self-sufficient. The virgo will go out of his way to pay your phone bill, but don't even think about doing that for him unless he asks. And most virgos won't unless it's a dire need. What you did was nice, but it stomped on his ego a little. He wants to take care of you, not the other way around.

I'm a Cap and want to take care of him though - to no end!

Yeah, I'm not getting the whole story either. Take a chill and talk it out. You're still going crazy over this, and while are you are like this, nothing will get done.

@gemtaur, I don't think I'm over reacting. None-the-less I appreciate what you're saying, but don't follow! I want to take care of him point blank, it's what I do. He doesn't appreciate my efforts to do so!!!!!!!!!!

The reason why we think you're overreacting is because we aren't getting the whole story. From the beginning, it was like "woah, calm down. It's one little thing." I understand how you feel; I get upset when people don't appreciate me. Virgos like to feel appreciated for what they do. Yes your virgo could have spoken to you about it, but again, us virgos don't want to go out of our way to explain what you can and can't do. For example, while it's a parent's job, I won't even call my mother if I need a little extra money because I feel it's my duty to do this on my own. When she just handed me money, I actually got upset. Talk to your virgo and explain how you're upset. You huffing right now isn't helping. Virgos LOVE to take care of people and help and serve; you are such a lovely person for wanting to do that, so explain it to your virgo or he won't ever be able to appreciate it. You're doing his job, so it's a threatening thing.

No, you aren't overreacting. But what you aren't doing that is so very important is taking time to think about how he may feel. If you don't do that then how can this relationship work out if all you will do is think about how you've been wrongfully treated?

Everyone should eat a cookie and chillax. I could use a cookie.

&id

Posted by gemtaur
aaawwww. poor candeh. see, and you thought gems were good. in MEASURED doses, sweetie. measured doses 😉

i'm just teasing, lil. but i do hope you're inhaling and exhaling into a paper bag as we interact. lol you'll be fine. it's all good. the guy really likes you. just don't be so hard on yourself and try to make everything perfect, that's his job 🙂

Oh geez I know. Before dxp and this one gem, I COULD NOT handle gems. They made my skin crawl. I'm dealing with them a little better now, though lol.

you can ditch him and date me lmao


i love gifts idc who it comes from lmao.


leo moon and venus in libra shower me with gifts yayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy life is 2 short 2 be mad over someone getting u gift just be thankful that someone cared about you getting u something sorry for my rant i really dont like ungrateful people i wonder what he had said if it was chirstmas lmfao.

Posted by gemtaur

Posted by LeGendary ViRGo


you can ditch him and date me lmao


i love gifts idc who it comes from lmao.


leo moon and venus in libra shower me with gifts yayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy life is 2 short 2 be mad over someone getting u gift just be thankful that someone cared about you getting u something sorry for my rant i really dont like ungrateful people i wonder what he had said if it was chirstmas lmfao.

Listen you, one LEO is enough for this Gem. Two of you and that would be the end of me. *fainting* lol

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lmfao dont worry i still luv ya lol 😉.

Don't worry Gem, I still have your back. I may also have leo, but I have more sense. 😛

I mean, I could also try to woo you, but I'll take a backseat, lol.

Thanks guys. It's just hurtful that he didn't appreciate it. No, he didn't ask me to do it and I know he doesn't need me to help him out financially, but I did it out of just wanting to since I was there. I did try to call him first, but he didn't answer.

He kept going on that I don't understand, that he likes messing with the phone company - essentially he was saying I messed up his game. Background on that: weekly he gets notification that they're going to shut off his phone for non-payment and he calls them up and tells them he has no money, gives them a line of BS and asks if they can give him more time. He pays a little here and a little there to keep his acct active but refuses to just pay it in full.

And he's right, I don't understand. I wouldn't waste my time messing around with it nor could I handle having an outstanding bill out there. Whatever floats his boat. Maybe I should remind him all the late fees he's been paying since he seems to think he's somehow 'punishing' the phone company with his games because they have taken so much of his money over the years. *rolls eyes*

Posted by LeGendary ViRGo


you can ditch him and date me lmao

awww, you're so sweet... too bad I'm like cougar age and 2 hrs away 🙂

Why the heck does he get a kick out of doing that to his phone service provider? So strange.

He goes on about how I am so strung along and dependent upon the system because I play by the system's rules - the thing is, I don't, I don't pay interest, I don't pay late fees and I do see what the system does/is doing. I don't play their game, but I do cover my own ass. Not worth my time to play games with them... as I see it, he's not playing games with the company, he's playing games with the folks who are trying to earn a living by being employed by them and he's screwing himself in the end. Very, very frustrating in my mind!

Has your virgo always had issues with paying bills or just his phone bill? What is his history with them? You left a lot of this out, so it's very peculiar, but it's bringing more light as to why he got upset with you taking care of it for him. While what he's doing sounds a bit idiotic, he had his plans and wanted to handle his own. You stepping in without his permission kind of threw everything off for him. He has this mindset, and one little wrench in his process is blown up to him. What you didn't wasn't wrong; his actions are strange, but Jason made a good point that you have to try to understand how he feels about all this. That doesn't mean go along with him, but at least understand.

Posted by caribbeangold
i don't blame him and i do think you are overreacting.

virgo men don't like to be controlled or told what to do. they don't need a mother and they are not a pisces or a cancer. they can stand on their own and be successful on their own with no problems. bachelors of the zodiac.
you, as a capricorn, will have to compromise your "i can do everything for you" nature otherwise, it will be tough.

awwwwwwwwwww u think ur a virgo expert u still need schooling lmao




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lmfao.

Posted by lildol

Posted by LeGendary ViRGo


you can ditch him and date me lmao

awww, you're so sweet... too bad I'm like cougar age and 2 hrs away 🙂

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im sure ur not that far in cougar age lol.



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Posted by caribbeangold
do you have a problem with what i wrote?
what does needing schooling have to do with this?
i have lots of virgo friends, relatives and i have planets in virgo.
and i gave my opinion judging from the virgos i know.

so, what's your problem?

nope clearly i prove my point if u clearly knew virgos u kno virgos are asses and sarcastic lmao i have many virgo friends 2.

what ur dealing with a sept virgo i bet lol.

Posted by caribbeangold
do you have a problem with what i wrote?
what does needing schooling have to do with this?
i have lots of virgo friends, relatives and i have planets in virgo.
and i gave my opinion judging from the virgos i know.

so, what's your problem?

don't mind LV, hon. He likes to think he's all that, sometimes. 😛

Posted by KingPisces

Posted by Candeh15

Posted by caribbeangold
do you have a problem with what i wrote?
what does needing schooling have to do with this?
i have lots of virgo friends, relatives and i have planets in virgo.
and i gave my opinion judging from the virgos i know.

so, what's your problem?

don't mind LV, hon. He likes to think he's all that, sometimes. 😛

He is all that 😄

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stop it guys are to much lol.

Posted by Candeh15

Posted by caribbeangold
do you have a problem with what i wrote?
what does needing schooling have to do with this?
i have lots of virgo friends, relatives and i have planets in virgo.
and i gave my opinion judging from the virgos i know.

so, what's your problem?

don't mind LV, hon. He likes to think he's all that, sometimes. 😛

click to expand

i'm all dat. 😛

Posted by catguy

Posted by caribbeangold
do you have a problem with what i wrote?
what does needing schooling have to do with this?
i have lots of virgo friends, relatives and i have planets in virgo.
and i gave my opinion judging from the virgos i know.

so, what's your problem?

Back the fvck away from LV.

I don't think she's overreacting. She did something from the kindness of her heart and the dude has a hissy because he can't pay his bill on time. I can understand that he's trying to stretch out the payment, but to have the poor girl in tears, I mean seriously, be a man...

I can think of a lot worse things than somebody paying your phone bill for you.

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awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww thankyou ct u rock lol.

Posted by catguy
Nobody is gonna bully LV. lmao.

one no can bully me ima lion rawwwwwwwwrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr leo moon.

Oh no one's bullying LV. If he couldn't handle himself, I'd honestly have to laugh in his face.

Posted by Candeh15
Oh no one's bullying LV. If he couldn't handle himself, I'd honestly have to laugh in his face.

lol that u would be funny if i couldn't.

Posted by catguy
^^^lol. You're right, but Candeh told me to hop in the backseat with her. Who am I to say no?

My backseat is wonderful. How could you say no?

Posted by caribbeangold

Posted by catguy


Back the fvck away from LV.

I don't think she's overreacting. She did something from the kindness of her heart and the dude has a hissy because he can't pay his bill on time. I can understand that he's trying to stretch out the payment, but to have the poor girl in tears, I mean seriously, be a man...

I can think of a lot worse things than somebody paying your phone bill for you.

first of all, i don't think lv needs any defending. second, nobody is bullying him and i am sure, he even took my comments with a grain of salt. i think you took this way too personal. he is an august virgo after all, sarcastic, relaxed and fun. and all the virgos i know are september ones, more serious. you are right, lv. 🙂 he was not offended. geez....

regardless, we will have to agree to disagree.

personally, knowing cap and virgo relationships, i am pretty sure that this was not the first time that she tried to do things for him, and the virgo, exploded. for him, it was the last straw, if you get what i mean.

virgos rarely explode just like that, i think that something must have been building up for him to react in such a manner. i bet my that he was feeling she was treating him as a child.

also, doesn't she have gemini placements? well, that adds a different dynamic to the relationship.
gemini and virgo are squared.

you, as a leo, you are more likely to see this in a different light because leos are very generous, love generosity and don't mind being helped. you would not reac like him, but, assuming that her virgo is a september one, well, it is different story.

peace!

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lol i did take comment with a pinch of salt lol.

i knew ur virgo was a sept virgo they act more serious where august are sunny fun and laid back but it also depends on chart placements.

regardless lildol virgo shouldn't had behave like that a man will appreciate what a woman does for him thats why its called a relationship 50/50 he acted like a brat that was to generous next time she should let him suffer gems are kindhearted gem moons even more so.

virgos can be such cookiemonsteres over the Little butter so glad i have lots of air placements and a fire moon to balance that out.

Posted by catguy

Posted by Candeh15

Posted by catguy
^^^lol. You're right, but Candeh told me to hop in the backseat with her. Who am I to say no?

My backseat is wonderful. How could you say no?

Yes, it is wonderful, and you'd have to buckle up because it would be a wild ride, maybe even need one of those airbags to protect you from repeated impacts.

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I feel like this is a threat... a sexy threat.

Tongue fencing. My favorite form of fighting.

Posted by Pesca

Posted by Candeh15
Tongue fencing. My favorite form of fighting.

hey, leos also like biting and scratching 😄

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I am quite the fan of biting as well. I try to keep my claws trimmed so that I don't scratch.

Posted by catguy

Posted by Candeh15
Tongue fencing. My favorite form of fighting.

I was referring to the "other lips." The kind where you cannot put up a fight.

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ahhhhhhh. The REAL kitty.

Posted by catguy

Posted by KingPisces

Posted by catguy

Posted by Candeh15

Posted by catguy
^^^lol. You're right, but Candeh told me to hop in the backseat with her. Who am I to say no?

My backseat is wonderful. How could you say no?

Yes, it is wonderful, and you'd have to buckle up because it would be a wild ride, maybe even need one of those airbags to protect you from repeated impacts.

LMAO....Slow down feline....She's dangerous like a construction zone. Put on your hardhat 😉

Well then she won't mind a jackhammer.

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Oh geez I just saw this.

Earlier this week I went to the phone store because I was shopping for a new one and he asked me to put something on his bill but the store was closed due to the system being down. So, I just followed through when I had a chance. He has no financial issues and I didn't do it because I thought he couldn't pay it, I did it because I was there (it was only $ 20... I didn't pay it off). I reiterated today that I simply did it because it was a nice gesture. He changed the subject. He's moved on from it I think. I'm not trying to baby him or be a parent as has been said (who is this carribiangold anyway?), but I do have a tendency and go out of my way to take care of people I care about.

His reaction, in my mind, was over the top. He should have said, "you didn't have to do that, but thanks". I was totally crushed he didn't just see it for what it was. I just won't go out of my way again to be nice (yeah, like that's really going to happen, I can't help myself sometimes).

He didn't have a right to blow up like that, but you do have to understand what he enjoys and what truly makes him feel good. Deep down, he probably does feel thankful for that, but I know for me, I wouldn't be able to stop feeling guilty or like there is this weight. It's one thing to, like say, wash his car and change his oil, but to pay his bill, that's almost beyond what anyone would expect or ask for. He is very lucky to have you, but do things for him in smaller increments. And if you really must, ask him before hand to save yourself another unnecessary blow up. Also, tell him that it hurt your feelings and you didnt' appreciate his outburst, but that you won't do it again unless he asks.

Yeah, I do CG. It happens. I just shrug it off and go elsewhere lol.