point of convo..virguys..

---so i asked my virguy (im a saggie) today if he wanted me to look different.----

[backdrop]: when we first met, he told me he loves my hair(its kinda messy and alil' wild lol) and after not talking for a while, we started talking again and he mentions again how much he likes it, but he also mentions about the color.
he mentions that its black(its not, its a medium brown).
a couple of times he tells me hes attracted to the crazy chick from the craft. and its hot when a girls a little out there(i guess) im thinking what he means is a girl whos not afraid and in control..
then today he says that i should cut my hair like betty paige and i dunno...i guess it would be hotter if i looked similar to her or soemthing...
im just your average girl next door i guess. i dont drink and dont really party.

it just makes me selfconscience that hes attracted to my personality and yet hes attracted to that pinup, dark hair, mysterious girl or whatever..
basically something im not.

so i asked him, and of course he reassures me that he is attaracted to me, and to him being attracted to my personality is the same as being attracted to my looks. basically that he prefers brains over body i guess..

but if thats the case, why would he mention it? several times?
i dunno..

and now i have him all worrying about what i asked. he calls me back and is all down in the dumps because i basically said he makes me feel unhappy.which isnt true, but because i was complaining about some things hes said,
now i feel as if all hes ganna do is worry about the things hes says to me and hes not ganna be comfortable around me as much anymore...

uuhhgg
can you please explain.. is this ganna be a problem later on..??
you virguys love honesty and communication, and yet when something is brought up... everything feels like a downwards spiral...

yeah but, now that i had him worrying about what i said, is he always ganna worry about what he says to me??

uuhhgg i give him tons and tons of space, if anything it bothers him that i give him that much space..
i hate this. i dont want him to worry about what i might take offense to, and therefor not want to be open with me, as we have been since we started.
what ca i do to reassure him that it was just a question and to not worry about it.
ive already told him this, but i can tell in his voice that it does bother him alot. he says it makes him sad to know he made me feel that way...



uuhhhggg!!!!
dont worry about it! seriously!!!

buit i know he cant, and wont.. and that sucks.
i should have never opened my mouth.

What I would say is this if it comes up again. "Wow, I really appreciated your suggestion/compliment about looking like Bette Paige... she is really beautiful and I am flattered that you think I'd look as sexy as she does."

Everyone has an ideal of what we think we want our partner to be or look like, however once you get to know one another, some of those things tend to fade away as we become closer to the person.

I think you are reading too deeply into it. You said, "---so i asked my virguy (im a saggie) today if he wanted me to look different.----", which prompted honesty from him. Virgos are honest and direct hon. Then you got upset because you got an answer. He thinks the Bettie Page look is hot, doesn't mean he thinks you aren't.

Don't change yourself to make someone else happy. Do it for yourself.

Look at my other pic in my profile.

Listen to Shaka,
your man was just playful.
if a virgo criticizes you then they really love you.
A Sag does not enjoy this kind of party. but it is the whole truth. He cares about you.
Develop a thicker skin with a Virgo. Otherwise we will meet you in psycho clinic.

I have all this drama with my sister who cares for "what is good for me" once before I asked her for that.

He has taken your words to heart.

If you ever tell a Virgo he has made you unhappy, this will drive him mad.

I always talk about my Saggie's hair. I love how it looks all ruffled and wild.

haha thats sooo like him. mines all kinds of wild and whatnot, and he likes it the best that way. lol i think its cute.
and yeah we talked.. dwelling: you are completely right, as soon as he thought that he made me unhappy, it really.. i mean REALLY brought him down in the dumps.

he felt so shotty about even mentioning it because i took it io heart, for the next few days he was all distraught about the whole thing.

but we talked, it mulled over, and were as happy as clams.lol

another question.. this might be personal, but

[weve been together for about 2 weeks but have been talking for a while, and havent been real physical.. mainly on my part. i ussually jump into things too quickly and i like him too much to make that mistake again.. but i also dont want him to feel like im not into him or anything.. like what do virguys feel is respectable and when would you start questioning?]
that might sound weird..

but im just curious. and i understand everyone is differwent and also that if he really cares it shouldnt matter the amount of time, but im just curious. i know how yall like a person who has morals and isnt slutty and stuff, but yeah..
🙂 thanks!!

Im not a virguy, hey Im not even a guy but I think you need to ask yourself that question and you only....ONLY you can decide when the time is right and it seems he's not pressuring you which is a good sign. Of all the Virguys I know they are ALL gentlemen and wouldnt cause hurt or stress intentionally. I think you should just go with whatever is right for YOU.

From my own experience, my Virguy likes the fact I act like a lady, I have morals (man does he respect that) but he likes it when I get flirty and when we're alone? well yeah ok - I wont go further......they seem to like the sweet innocent exterior but its a turn on when they get you to themselves and you can get all naughty 😛 Gives them a wicked thrill - and Ive spoken to a few about this....seems thats what they like but then again what guy wouldnt?

Just be true to yourself...I think he'll respect you more if you do. He probably wont push, they are slooooooow anyway hehehe

dwelling: you are completely right, as soon as he thought that he made me unhappy, it really.. i mean REALLY brought him down in the dumps.

I think the same, but actually it was cajun whom you stated so.

you need to ask yourself that question and you only....ONLY you can decide when the time is right and it seems he's not pressuring you which is a good sign.

I agree. you should never care what a guy thinks in this relation. Early or late you define.

Usually it is early as long as you do not know enough about him (worst case he could be psycho sick, an abuser, violent etc) so that you will regret if you do it. In that case you should hold back even if it is difficult.

You ask the society what is the right time? they don't know by themselves. They ask too. Unless you follow church or stuff like that.

If you want him to feel as though are not into him, he will become discouraged and distance himself from you.
Virgos need stability and consistency.

Virgo men do respect ethics, morals and cleanliness. Act like a lady, well kempt, proper speech, willing to let him help and guide you.