The Virgo Consensus : Consoling a Breakup

Yes... so I have found out some horrifying and shocking truths about male behaviour in the last few years, but this stands amongst the worst I have observed. I openly admit I am very naive and I have had a sheltered upbringing but certain things really confuse me.

When a female friend of mine breaks up, I am quick to express my sympathy and discontent with their heartache. I listen to all of their woes, console and offer advice. I analyse their relationship and problems and try to offer insight as a male and justify or lambaste decisions made by the man so that they may have understanding and possibly closure. This is where things end for me.

I have observed that other males given the same situation, offer sex to the woman straight up. Some might sugar coat it, or listen a bit but their main goal is to get sex. My ex told me of the advances her friends used to make and have once again made to her when she has broken up in the past.

Can you honestly call these men friends?
Do women honestly keep this kind of company and find it tolerable?
Or is it just a Sag woman thing?

I find this behaviour appalling, lewd and disgusting, but for all I know it is the norm.
Do Virgos do this?
It's not in my nature to think or find this normal nor acceptable, at all.

Posted by Cajunspirit
Yes... so I have found out some horrifying and shocking truths about male behaviour in the last few years, but this stands amongst the worst I have observed. I openly admit I am very naive and I have had a sheltered upbringing but certain things really confuse me.

When a female friend of mine breaks up, I am quick to express my sympathy and discontent with their heartache. I listen to all of their woes, console and offer advice. I analyse their relationship and problems and try to offer insight as a male and justify or lambaste decisions made by the man so that they may have understanding and possibly closure. This is where things end for me.

I have observed that other males given the same situation, offer sex to the woman straight up. Some might sugar coat it, or listen a bit but their main goal is to get sex. My ex told me of the advances her friends used to make and have once again made to her when she has broken up in the past.

Can you honestly call these men friends?
Do women honestly keep this kind of company and find it tolerable?
Or is it just a Sag woman thing?

I find this behaviour appalling, lewd and disgusting, but for all I know it is the norm.
Do Virgos do this?
It's not in my nature to think or find this normal nor acceptable, at all.

listen soME people LOVE THA TRILL OR THA DRAMA AND MAKES THEM FEEL ALIVE BUT ITS ONLY A THRILL AT THA MOMENT AND GOES AWAY THEN THEY NEED 2 FIND A FILLER TO AVOID THA PAIN SO THEY KEEP GETTING THEIR HEART BROKEN OVER AND OVER AND NEVER LEARN I HAVE A VIRGO FEMALE FRIEND BORN ON SEPT AND SHE KEEPS GOING BACK 2 THA SAME JERK DAT TREATS HER LIKE SHIT I DECIDCE THAT I HAVE 2 RELEASE HER AS A FRIEND BECAUSE I CANT UNDERSTAND Y PEOPLE GO BAK 2 PAIN OVER AND OVER AND THE RESULTS ARE SILL THA SAME AND I DONT LIKE PEOPLE DONT LEARN A LESSON IT GETS ANNOYING AND OLD.

NEVER WROTE A PARAGRAPH IN CAPS IT FEELS GREAT LMFAO

Posted by Shaka_laka_boomboom
Yes cajun, you've had a very sheltered upbringing.

Alright, I can accept that. But as a Virgo man of 26 years is it now?
Have you ever done this?
Do you think it's alright to do?

Posted by sortilege85
This has to be the one of a few topics that truly disgust me, along with cheaters who enjoy cheating for a simple adrenaline rush.

It's human nature, cajun.

I had to learn the hard way when an ex of mine cheated on me and lied till the very end and continued to lie, but at times it is hard to see things through a positive fairy tale when another guy is doing your lady.

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Glad we are on the same page.

eh. the easiest way to not get sex from me is to offer it, but it works well with a lot of women, so i can't say i blame guys for trying. yes, they do try. no, i don't consider guys like that friends.

It's called having standards..... some men think that when a women opens herself up emotionally, that that is an indication of something more. I've seen women play into that tactic, just to get a rebound. I've seen guys do it, just to get some action.

The point is, that you don't do it, and that you don't accept it. That doesn't make you sheltered or naive.

"I find this behaviour appalling, lewd and disgusting, but for all I know it is the norm.
Do Virgos do this?
It's not in my nature to think or find this normal nor acceptable, at all. "

I agree and I dont put myself in those kinds of situations and keep a good distance from a guys motives. I can smell motives from miles and miles away... I side step anything like this easily. I'm know it happens though.

I've never been the type of girl to go to a guy for comfort after a breakup. I have a few very good girlfriends for that and if they are not available right away... I can wait. The guys I've dated have always worried with me where it is I run off to after an argument or who it is that I talk to... and I am definitely NOT the type of female to run into the arms of some other guy if I'm having trouble with mine. That's just horseshit to me. I go take a breather by myself. I dont go putting forth effort to make the situation worse or my life more complicated.

If you want to be the type of girl to allow a 'guy friend' to take advantage of you and your situation, then obviously you want it. If you are going to be the type of guy thats disgustingly opportunistic, then obviously you want the rep. Whatever works for some people, ya know? Have at it. I just dont want to hear those same people complain or bitch about drama later. Wont have my sympathy.

Rebounding out of spite, for ego, or for the sake of a warm body = weak. imo ...those are just the harsh standards I hold myself to.

I can't see any of the virguys I've known doing this but I'm sure there are guys of all signs who are guilty. Actually if I were to make a judgement as to which sign does it the most... In my experience... I've had two guys try this with me... both were cancer guys.

Posted by CreepyPants

Rebounding out of spite, for ego, or for the sake of a warm body = weak. imo ...those are just the harsh standards I hold myself to.

I would never call those standards harsh.

Posted by Mars.In.Aries

The point is, that you don't do it, and that you don't accept it. That doesn't make you sheltered or naive.

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Amen, it just shocked me to find out this kind of thing exists.