Damnata
@Damnata
15 Years25,000+ PostsVirgo
Comments: 252 · Posts: 36418 · Topics: 473
Virgo insight needed
I don't know about the first part yet, I haven't seen any passive aggression (she is quite straight in what she wants to say). However she did mention she was good at silent treatment which is a form of emotional manipulation.
The second part is bang on, very scattered about her wants and needs. She plays it all by ear but for some reason she seems to like me a lot and is very affectionate, touchy feely etc. This open show of affection was a bit odd for me having known quite a few Virgos, they are generally very uncomfortable with PDA.
The second part is bang on, very scattered about her wants and needs. She plays it all by ear but for some reason she seems to like me a lot and is very affectionate, touchy feely etc. This open show of affection was a bit odd for me having known quite a few Virgos, they are generally very uncomfortable with PDA.
Water and earth are considered feminine signs..more passive in the way they approach emotions..water signs feel confortable, earth signs feel out of their element.
Air and fire openly pursue, being considered masculine signs. She has a majority of air and fire planets in her chart, therefore she's open with her emotions. I have mainly fire in my chart and I go after what I want..I demonstrate my feelings easily so I act more like a fire sign. I love PDA, not to the point where it becomes distasteful in public (where people start telling you to get a room already). If she had more earth, she'd be more shy. You must be accustomed to Virgos with earth and water planets in their charts.
The silent treatment, I'd be wary of that.In my experience if someone brings to attention they are good at that, it raises a red flag because it makes me wonder whether they could use that against me, as means to get their way. If there's any conflict, I prefer to talk about it as soon as it surfaces and to deal with it..and if you retreat and block my attemps, I see that as controlling and passive-agressive, because you care more about getting your way then reaching a compromise for both of us
Air and fire openly pursue, being considered masculine signs. She has a majority of air and fire planets in her chart, therefore she's open with her emotions. I have mainly fire in my chart and I go after what I want..I demonstrate my feelings easily so I act more like a fire sign. I love PDA, not to the point where it becomes distasteful in public (where people start telling you to get a room already). If she had more earth, she'd be more shy. You must be accustomed to Virgos with earth and water planets in their charts.
The silent treatment, I'd be wary of that.In my experience if someone brings to attention they are good at that, it raises a red flag because it makes me wonder whether they could use that against me, as means to get their way. If there's any conflict, I prefer to talk about it as soon as it surfaces and to deal with it..and if you retreat and block my attemps, I see that as controlling and passive-agressive, because you care more about getting your way then reaching a compromise for both of us
Yeah, you are right about the air and fire thing. On my chart I have sun and mercury in Cancer but everything else is air and fire. So I generally end up having very turbulent relationships with standard virgos and I am always baffled since Cancers and Virgos are supposed to get along very well. In my case it doesn't seem to work because of my placements. I see that it is the case with my new Virgo friend as well. She has all air and fire as you rightly pointed out. I did miss out mentioning that she has a Cancer Ascendant and I think she gets hurt easily (just a feeling). I make a choice and pursue decisively but then the Cancer part of me kicks in and I go slow (lol...would have been easier being Aries).
I am intrigued by your words about the silent treatment, being a Cancer I am no stranger to this phenomenon. I do it from time to time too, just for impact value more than control though. I have noted with her that she is very pragmatic about situations, when someone is genuine she compromises immediately. I am not sure if the silent treatment statement was just said in jest or if she was serious. Would be interesting to watch that one though.
What do you think about her Venus/Mars combination?
I am intrigued by your words about the silent treatment, being a Cancer I am no stranger to this phenomenon. I do it from time to time too, just for impact value more than control though. I have noted with her that she is very pragmatic about situations, when someone is genuine she compromises immediately. I am not sure if the silent treatment statement was just said in jest or if she was serious. Would be interesting to watch that one though.
What do you think about her Venus/Mars combination?
She will be good at manipulating you with her acting and emoting skills.
When my cancer friends go into silent treatment, they usually do it to get a hold of their moods..and then they come back happy again. If they encounter some trouble communicating with someone, they back off to choose an avenue to deal with the situation. I don't think cancers do it for manipulation purposes.
Virgos on the other hand, from what I noticed...we can do it to get the upper hand on a situation. We analyze a lot so we can back off just to observe some reaction. If cancers take the time to regroup internally, virgos back off to see the situation more clearly and gauge reactions from people (externally). There's nothing wrong with someone stepping away to get a clear picture but if they apply this attitude when problem arise in a relationship...it is a red flag. My father (also a Virgo) will leave the room when he isn't in agreement with something and this used to cause a lot of friction between him and my Leo mother. She would come to him and tried to talk him out of it, but he shut everyone out. In his mind, his space was more important than trying to compromise with her, and understand where she came from..which in turn hurt her feelings. It just came across as insensitive.
Her Venus in Libra likes the setting to be right, the romance flowing in the air, all the gentlemanly gestures..basically everything that's sensible and with good taste. As a Cancer, you can probably woo a Venus in Libra the right way because you can adapt to her mood easily. Her Mars in Capricorn likes to take things slow and steady, so if you're also air and fire, this tendency will annoy you (I have a Mars in Aries..god knows I haven't patience with anything too slow).I know one Virgo with Cancer ascendant..she seemed sensitive and very demure, damsel in distress type..she plays men like a fiddle because they think she is so gullible and in need of assistance (she has a Scorpio Moon so she's calculated the outcome from the beginning).
Virgos on the other hand, from what I noticed...we can do it to get the upper hand on a situation. We analyze a lot so we can back off just to observe some reaction. If cancers take the time to regroup internally, virgos back off to see the situation more clearly and gauge reactions from people (externally). There's nothing wrong with someone stepping away to get a clear picture but if they apply this attitude when problem arise in a relationship...it is a red flag. My father (also a Virgo) will leave the room when he isn't in agreement with something and this used to cause a lot of friction between him and my Leo mother. She would come to him and tried to talk him out of it, but he shut everyone out. In his mind, his space was more important than trying to compromise with her, and understand where she came from..which in turn hurt her feelings. It just came across as insensitive.
Her Venus in Libra likes the setting to be right, the romance flowing in the air, all the gentlemanly gestures..basically everything that's sensible and with good taste. As a Cancer, you can probably woo a Venus in Libra the right way because you can adapt to her mood easily. Her Mars in Capricorn likes to take things slow and steady, so if you're also air and fire, this tendency will annoy you (I have a Mars in Aries..god knows I haven't patience with anything too slow).I know one Virgo with Cancer ascendant..she seemed sensitive and very demure, damsel in distress type..she plays men like a fiddle because they think she is so gullible and in need of assistance (she has a Scorpio Moon so she's calculated the outcome from the beginning).
Posted by wgamador2
She will be good at manipulating you with her acting and emoting skills.
Ok, scary. Why would you say that? Curious...
I'm a Virgo sun with a Libra moon.
I think the silent treatment does not necessarily have to be a concern. When I was a teen it was something I resorted to but now it's not something I would consider.
If I have a problem with someone I am not close to most likely I just write them off after telling them off. With a friend I will take a bit of space for my temper to fizzle out and clear my head and then try to resolve things calmly.
The tricky thing will be with someone I could end up being close with but am not as yet. I can be a bit too cautious and might not hold on to them if they don't make an extra effort during conflicts until we spend enough time together so I can see what their intentions for me are. When that time passes I'll put everything I have into working out anything and everything.
Incandescent you had mentioned something in your other post about Virgos and talking to them regularly to keep the lines of communications open so when something is brewing it gets dealt with instead of festering and leading to a meltdown. I think that is the best approach to take, at least with a person like me. I do tend to follow the lead of my partner when things get tricky and treat him the way he treats me unless I feel his actions are beneath me I will just end it all together. There will be silence after that but only because we are finished and I don't intend to communicate further.
I think the silent treatment does not necessarily have to be a concern. When I was a teen it was something I resorted to but now it's not something I would consider.
If I have a problem with someone I am not close to most likely I just write them off after telling them off. With a friend I will take a bit of space for my temper to fizzle out and clear my head and then try to resolve things calmly.
The tricky thing will be with someone I could end up being close with but am not as yet. I can be a bit too cautious and might not hold on to them if they don't make an extra effort during conflicts until we spend enough time together so I can see what their intentions for me are. When that time passes I'll put everything I have into working out anything and everything.
Incandescent you had mentioned something in your other post about Virgos and talking to them regularly to keep the lines of communications open so when something is brewing it gets dealt with instead of festering and leading to a meltdown. I think that is the best approach to take, at least with a person like me. I do tend to follow the lead of my partner when things get tricky and treat him the way he treats me unless I feel his actions are beneath me I will just end it all together. There will be silence after that but only because we are finished and I don't intend to communicate further.
Posted by virgodreamz
I'm a Virgo sun with a Libra moon.
I think the silent treatment does not necessarily have to be a concern. When I was a teen it was something I resorted to but now it's not something I would consider.
If I have a problem with someone I am not close to most likely I just write them off after telling them off. With a friend I will take a bit of space for my temper to fizzle out and clear my head and then try to resolve things calmly.
The tricky thing will be with someone I could end up being close with but am not as yet. I can be a bit too cautious and might not hold on to them if they don't make an extra effort during conflicts until we spend enough time together so I can see what their intentions for me are. When that time passes I'll put everything I have into working out anything and everything.
Incandescent you had mentioned something in your other post about Virgos and talking to them regularly to keep the lines of communications open so when something is brewing it gets dealt with instead of festering and leading to a meltdown. I think that is the best approach to take, at least with a person like me. I do tend to follow the lead of my partner when things get tricky and treat him the way he treats me unless I feel his actions are beneath me I will just end it all together. There will be silence after that but only because we are finished and I don't intend to communicate further.
thanks for your input. It was very insightful and helps me to understand her a whole lot better. We hang out a lot together and we had a minor tiff a couple of weeks ago and I called a day later and fixed the situation to make sure things don't escalate. I think my actions were well received and appreciated and we put it behind us immediately. This to me was maturity on both sides and I felt very happy.
I am however sometimes confused by her actions like very touchy-feely for a Virgo and constantly asking me why I am distant etc. I am more confused by her intentions, at the same time on a lot of occasions she can snap and be impolite to me etc. for no reason. Very entertaining but also confusing, a nice friend overall though! Any insight on these actions?
Posted by incandescentcancerPosted by wgamador2
She will be good at manipulating you with her acting and emoting skills.
Ok, scary. Why would you say that? Curious...click to expand
Her 5th house placements. Look into them, it could be a good thing, you know, she'll be able to get you a table or cut lines, get change for what? What the hell do i know. Youre dating her.
Hahahahhaha.
Seriously though read about them and if you find something different come back and let me know, im always up for learning and being corrected constructively.
I think she is touchy feely just because she likes you. For me it can be a way of being flirty - unless she's like that with everyone then it's just probably her nature. I can also guess about her distance questions. I don't know if it's an insecurity on her part or if there is an inconsistency with the way you act with her. Virgos can be really analytical and detail oriented so if you act one way in a given situation and a different way another time she will notice the change even if it's a slight one and try to figure out what's behind it and if anything happened in your life that is bothering you or even if your behaviour is brought on by something on her part.
For the rudeness I am not sure. I'd have to know more details to know where she might be coming from. I wonder if she's very sensitive and maybe you inadvertently offended her. If you give an example of something that happened I might have a better idea. Virgos are pretty straight forward though so when she does it you could probably ask her what's behind it and I think she would tell you.
For the rudeness I am not sure. I'd have to know more details to know where she might be coming from. I wonder if she's very sensitive and maybe you inadvertently offended her. If you give an example of something that happened I might have a better idea. Virgos are pretty straight forward though so when she does it you could probably ask her what's behind it and I think she would tell you.
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I'm not really a fan of libra planets in a virgo's chart..we already overthink things to a high degree..I think this will make her go into overdrive and she might not project a clear image of what she wants because she might not know herself or it may be constantly changing.