Virgo man..Aries girl. Uh oh!

Hi guys

Was wondering if you could help me get to grip with the Virgo mans mind. Ive been reading through some posts on here and they follow a pattern...and yep mine appears to be following this too.

In short, met him 4 months ago. I have actually known him for years but not in a "relationship" way. 4 months before we met, he split with the mother of his child and i had split from a bad relationship.

Now, he chased me. Told me he loved me after a few weeks, seeing me every day, constantly texting me. While all this was going on, i know his ex was and is giving him grief and has turned to basically slagging me off. I do believe things she is saying to him about me (shes nuts!) is making him re think our relationship. Plus she is stressing him.

Ive supported him through this, we did have words one day as he called her and asked her about something i had told him!!!! I explained we would not work if he hadnt made a break from her and plus, i wont be in a relationhsip with a man who is still tied to his ex. He promised me it was over between them and he even told me he hates her!

Now over the last week, he has really trailed off. He's gone from texting me every morning, pm and evening. He was considerate, caring etc but this seems to have died off. He is great when i see him but, last week he text me once in the am and said he would call...he didnt. This repeated for 3 days. I didnt text either as if i say i am calling someone, i will do just that.

Now being an Aries, im watching this with amusement. What is going on here? Is he playing me?

We got together at the weekend and he was telling me how amazing i am...a rare breed and good find and how "good" we are. Since monday morning...he has dissapeared again. He was moaning about me now texting him..so i did..and he replied a few hours later, i replied..he ignored.

Im very independant but its the sudden switch from all on to me wondering if he is alive!? Whats happening lol??

I text him today after him being silent for a day and a half asking him he was ok. He said he was and that he had fell asleep early last night and was i ok. I feel like he's messing or testing me so i replied with "joker..yeah i'm fine thanks". he hasnt replied.

He's seriously hot and has some moves lol..but this is starting to grate on my nerves!

Sorry about the essay!

This is the usual Virgo Male-Aries Female pattern. Shit starts white hot, volcanic if you will.
But then something happens. The Virgo-Male forgets or was never made aware of the fact that what made him so appealing to the Ram girl was his passion during the pursuit and after the conquest, you know, when nothing and no one else existed.
You Aries women dont realize how hard it is to keep that passion going when shit starts to get in the way, i.e., work, family, unemployment....lol.

Ive spent say a total of 13 years with Aries women and while im not an Ram-girl expert shit seems to fizzle out and its usually the Virgo's fault.
My advice is find another lover.
Anyhow, Good luck.

to be fair, i didnt feel it was an ultimatum really. She was calling me all the names under the sun and i didnt react. She was stalking my facebook as her new boyf WAS a friend of mine on there. He then deleted and i told the Virgo this has happened and asked if he had said anything to his ex re our relationship. He then spilled out that she had been saying her new boyf told her i was trying to get it on with him constantly but he had knocked me back!!?? He then called his ex..and thrashed this out with her. all of this means he is discussing our relationship with her...why?? Its not right. I had a little rant...called her a tramp and that was it. I know i shouldnt have resorted to her level but im not having some nut job bad mouthing me when i have never met her. If he has a problem with that...so bit it. Im not a door mat and had kept my mouth shut for months about the butter she is pulling.

My point to him was..our relationship will suffer if she is involved in our business. In my opinion, he involved her by calling her after our discussion. I dont feel like i have done anything wrong, what is discussed between us is OUR business.

I would have no respect for him if he placed me above his child and after the above said argument, i have chilled. I keep telling him it will be ok and it will sort itself out but i kinda feel like shes not out of the picture. If he was done with her, he wouldnt be this involved with whats going on with her new boyf etc as he told me he wanted to beat him up! He comment was "he thinks hes better than me..he's with my ex and now he's making it sound like he could have had you but he rejected you". I mean come on, that didnt make me feel amazingly good! i told him "if i wanted to be smooch him..i would have and he would not have rejected me. Truth is, he is arogant big head and i wouldnt touch him". Lol..i am an aries after all!

Im sort of thinking i dont need this drama anyway. He distance is making us, well, just more and more distant. And im now going over recent events!!

And 25th decan..that was my point to him. She is meant to be an ex...i know he has to speak to her and i explained to him that there is a difference betweem being polite and decent for the sake of their child. I wouldnt have expected anything else from him.

But discussing me and him..with her. And them discussing the ex and her new boyf..NO WAY. it sounds like they are trying to score jealousy points with each other. Which means they are not done emotionally. Which means im checking out.

PotHead...i just sooooo did! Amazing how a nights sleep gives you clarity.

but damn that Virgo has some sexual thang going on ha!

Its not that, i was trying to handle the situation cos i liked him. I dont like many men and i thought he was worth it.

BUT..having to handle that plus him not replying to messages and ignoring me..is too much.

It just makes me think even more he's not over it and he's pulled away from me because he's got too much going on. Or hes thinking about getting back with her.

Its a shame cos we rocked and he knew it. He kept saying it.

Sheesh your not kidding, i will get over it however. Ive gotten past worse lol.

What you think i should do with the things he has at my house?? A large bag of clothes and some computer bits..oh and i have his house key.

You think i should discreetly drop them off at his (as in drop and run) or leave it until he asks for them—

Thanks Let it be, ive never dating someone with child so i am new to this, your advice is appreciated. Well it sounds like you have had more experience with this than anyone. My hat goes off to you for putting up with all of that. You certainly do have patience...a bucket load of it.

Her new guy hasnt met his child yet. I dont think he is that interested in her to be honest, he doesnt seem the type.

I just hate silence..if he has a problem tell me. It will be addressed but just falling into silence, well, hurts me kinda and makes me think ive done something terrible to him. I really would like to support him, im honestly a cool chick and i do feel for him. But he's gotta tell me and not just ignore me. I spose this is compatability floor. Im trying to chill it and relax, i was angry yesterday.

Im not hounding him, honestly im not. We had a good night saturday and sunday, we chilled ate nice food and it wasnt even mentioned. We cuddled up and laughed at stuff, he told me he loved me and then...poof.

I wont tug of war with her, shes not even worthy of my breath. It makes me sad how she effects him though. Ive gone silent myself. He says he will call...he doesnt. Im fretting hoping he's ok. I text him, he replies then goes silent again. Im staying silent and out of the way myself.

I think if he gets his head sorted (which he can cleary do on his own as that is what he is doing) then he will be in touch. Virgo or not, hes still a man and if they want you, they make it know. If i dont hear i will assume he didnt want us to carry on.

Ok point taken. Jeez he must think im a real nutter if he cant have his things back without me going crazy on him lol!

I will put them in the garage incase he wants them back.

That's wonderful thank you. You've got it 100% correct that's how I feel. I really wanted him to know I'm here but I don't think he would open up to me.

The only other thing I can't stop thinking is....what if I've got it wrong. What if he's decided he just doesn't want to be with me and it's nothing to do with his ex? What if he's decided to get back with her? I'll feel humiliated if I text him AGAIN telling him I'm here and he's just decided he doesn't want to be with me lol!!!

If I text him what do you think about this " hey you. Not sure what's gone on over the last few days but if something is bothering you you can always talk to me about it"

Clear and to the point.
Lol what I really want to say is "oi you've been ignoring me and it's racked me off but I miss your face so come and see me and you can tell me what's bothering you"

thank you i will do it now and let you know what happens. Lol i dont handle rejection very well...fingers crossed it doesnt happen haa!

thank you very much for your help.

Oooh ive done it....im scared lol! Jeez as an Aries i find it really hard to feel vunerable with someone! And vunerable just sums up how i feel now. I made my heart available to him after a truely horrendous relationship with an aquarius ended.

someone tell a joke to divert my attention from a pending reply.....

This is true!!

I've had a response. Basically he said sometimes he's happy and sometimes he's not. He likes me a lot but his life is complicated. He asked for a few days to get his head straight.

I basically said no way, I don't hang around for anyone, I feel used!!

That above was a joke lol...sorry I'm trying to cheer myself up!!

I replied with "I understand, uve got a lot going on. I'm here if u want an ear to listen. Try to be happy".

That's is I do feel for him and I'll leave him alone. Of he contacts me he does...if he doesn't so be it.

Isn't life's journeys bumpy roads and endless turns.

Ok! I'll do this, I won't contact him at all. I've got a good weekend planned anyway.

I sort of respect him for replying but I do predict this is in the end of our relationship. If you love someone, giving them space is a way of getting rid lol. But I'm an Aries after all.

My prediction is this...I won't hear anything then I'll find out he's cruising someone else...maybe his ex.

I'm usually right 😉

I'm actually feeling very sad about now. After my ex I promised I'd never let anyone break my heart again.

Now I know I'm not broken hearted over this but it hurts a bit..I've actually shed a tear.

Tomorrows a different day I suppose but I know I'll resent the Virgo for putting me thru this. Why tell someone you love them if ur heads not in the right place. It sucks

U speak words of wisdom lol. U know I'm angry with him, he's tainted us, almost ruined it. I was really happy and was willing to accept his situation but I feel like he's bailed.

Now I will always be waiting for the "when things get tough.... I'm out of here" response. Yeah I'm a tough girl but man, I want a man who won't leave me hanging.

Sorry if it sounds selfish, yeah I know he's got issues but if ur together, u can beat it. If you bail on someone when uve told them you Love them, that you will take care of them what does that say.

I'm bouncing...pls note this is not a pity party...it helps to get it out. I can't say this to my friends, they think I'm rock solid lol. I can't dissapointed them ha!

Sorry let it be, I didn't read your response before I wrote my post.

Patience - what is that—!!! I'm joking. I know.

He's been a bit of a douche when he was younger but he reckons he's matured. Your knowledge of virgos seems to be deep, your help has been great (and you 25th).

Half of this prob comes from me im thinking. After splitting with my ex (who to add was an abusive physco who assaulted me and self harmed in front of me!) I told myself I wouldn't get involved with a man again. Now look what's happened lol. I tried it and I don't appreciate the anguish he's causing.

A need to lighten up is required I think. I must be depressing everyone reading this.

Noted...thank you. Im just gonna go about my business as usual. Have fun go out with my friends and socialise 🙂

5 months here and yup...exact same pattern...
Conversation led to me telling mine that I couldn't see him if he was seeing other people after an emotionally trying, drama filled day with my girlfriends. (Nothing to do with him) Bad idea. 2 days later I got a text telling me that his family was his first priority,that until that was over, he could not give anymore than he is, that he felt guilty about and I deserved better but he still wanted to be good friends. I texted him back telling him that I was being unfair as I knew his situation and that I said it out of emotion, not from my head and I understood as I had to take care of a parent. I also told him that it made me sad as finding a connection and a for realness is rare, that I knew he liked me and could tell by things he said and the fact that he kept coming back to see m. Most of all, I could see it in his eyes. In his next text, he said he agreed, that it was new to him and he didn't want to hurt. He said he was torn between getting closer and "just being me" for a while. Ahem...afraid. I stated back that I thought a healthy relationship has both and... that we have 3 choices...To part now, to dive in or just keep things the same. I voted for the latter. He never really gave an answer, but things went back to normal and I saw him the weekend after that so I knew. We had a great...I mean great time. 🙂
His daughter was in town from out of state and the next several days I received minimal and unanswered text or he just poofed in the middle of a conversation. He left 2 days ago and I have gotten not one text. But I know from our discussion that that comes first. We...just want the satisfaction that they at least thought of us! I'm sure he is focusing every bit of attention to her while he can. Since our discussion, I feel a lot more secure and I don't stress over it anymore. Yes, patience. Yes, give them space to think and work out their stuff. They will run if you put pressure on them. Mine did. I had to back up and use my head and not my emotions to fix it. I used what I learned on here🙂
So there is hope!

Thank you that helps, nice to know I'm not the only one in this situation. So things are ok with you now?

I have a limited range of emotions...absolute grief, anger and coldness lol. I'm keeping them all in check and won't say a word to him.

It's hard for me to not think he's ruined it now to be honest but we will see what happens.

I've always thought of Virgo and Aries as one of the oddball pairings. Sorta like sardines on cheesecake. Just a bad idea. I imagine it's the "opposites attracts" that draws the two together.

Just checking in...still no text or call lol.

About this patience thing....how long do you have to do it for— Any guidance ha!!??

He has "liked" a fb status of mine today but apart from that...zilch

I take it back, I've just had a fb message.

The content is his phone is broken ( why do people say that when they r ignoring u lol) and he's sorry he hasn't seen me. His life is wierd at the mo but then goes on to say his ex has been dumped by her new Boyf. Then calls her a nasty name!

I replied saying I understand and appreciate him telling me. I said I'm sure his ex will be fine and I wished him a nice weekend.

I've checked out...I'm sad but can't be party to this. I can't figure this out at all

I know this...you know this! Just think its insulting that someone, who on their own accord tells you they love you, sends you a message on Facebook telling you the above. On Facebook...really. Its cowardly and insulting. I'm being patient, I haven't been messaging him. I've replied being polite but I'm trying to figure out what's going on. If you like someone it's hard to pretend nothing's going on without questioning it.

I've offered him his clothes and key back so he's not inconvienienced. I've said I hope he enjoys his time off.

It's the waiting game....

Well it's done. I got a message today saying he's not getting back with his ex, he's too proud. Too much has gone on and that her new Boyf dumping her has made him think worse of her. He feels that after coming out of a 7 yr relationship he needs to be alone. He followed with some nice compliments on me being great and how we know I'll be ok.

I thanked him for being so nice to me and treating me well and I hope he finds peace of mind. I reminded him I meant the nice things I said to him when we're together and left it at that.

I told him I'd return his things when I was going past his house next as I know the times he's not there.

Wow, I'm a bit gutted! I knew this was coming but was hopeful for a different outcome. He did however say we had a connection (and great rudes) lol which I'm pleased he agreed.

I don't know what to do now. It's best to forget, I don't think he will be coming back but it's a shame, we were good together.

Well the Virgo has popped back up! We had exchanged a few messages on fb. One said he'd been thinking about me and that we'd had some good times.

The next was how he missed my pootang!!!!— Come on now.

I assume he's trying to turn me into a fwb. This sucks.

I mean yeah, we rocked in bed, but I'm seriously not happy about being used for just sex. I cud tree trunk some I didn't like that much and use them for sex. But there's feelings involved and it will be messy.

I know he ended up with his girlf after they just used to tree trunk each other...and yeah we got it on good, but you think this is a road to ruin—?

I'm shocked that a man "isn't ready for a relationship" but manages to be ready for sex! Haaaaa pls sense the sarcasm!

Thanks let it be, that's exactly what I have told him. I'm worth more than that! I said what I said above, threw in ur comment and then added he's a hot guy, he will find a girl who he can just tree trunk. That way I get to keep my self respect and my thoughts of us together will be kept nice in my head rather than us falling out when this ends bad.

I feel sad but I've learnt a lot over recent yrs and giving the milk without renting the cow leads to spilt milk lol.,

He's asked to take me out for dinner to talk tonight. Now this is dangerous ground....

Is this all part of the milk snatch plan lol??! Mmmmm. Not sure.

Thx as always let it be. How are you?

I know how you feel I'm experiencing the same thing except for my situation is little more complicated I have a virgo in my life & I been dealing with him for 2 1/2 years we go back & forth all I can say is give him space it's not easy being an aries we just have so much damn fire & are very loyal😉

I know this is an old post, but fits my situation exactly. Me, aries, and this virgo man were getting along so awesome. We meshed, i was falling hard and so was he. At the beginning we both said we didnt want a relationship, but after a few weeks were talking abouy one day being bf/gf. He has kids with a mental ass crazy person. Yhe reason he didnt wany a gf was the stress and it would put on his life, becuz she will make things miserable for him and his kids. He is a very awesome dad, and puys his kids first, before even himself. We had one thing that happned a couple weeks ago that put some distance between us, i think i blew it out of proportion, aries here, lol. We were slowly on the road to recovery. Then a couple days ago his ex found out. She made a big scene at his work, she posting nasty ass lies about me on facebook. Saying i was hurt because i want him to put me ahead of his kids. That too was something that I loved about him. How he is all about his kids. I have kids myself, ane thier dad hardly jas the time of day for them. So this guy, is amazing to me. Anyway, it doesnt really matter what lies she says, i know the truth! So to make a long story short. He ended it like that. Said he can't handle all yhe stress from her making it hard for him to be in his kids lives. Just said "guess maybe down the road we might beable to chill" . Really sux! We were getting so deep and close, nd now nothing!f*c/! I just dont know ehat the hell to do!