Virgo w/Taurus man ..what to do?

I am a virgo who dated a Taurus for two an half months. Yes, we were in love and everything would be good at times. But there was those times in our relationship were he was so hard headed (his way or high way, very loving and had my back for anything as while as my child who was not his). But he went into depression a lot thought the relationship and it was very hard trying to make it would.. I felt like he kept me guessing if it was me.. if I wasn't doing enough for him..I tried many times to talk to him about my feelings.. he would say nothing or just say hes not man enough and I deserve better..I seriously didn't like hearing that and only wanted to be with him.. I loved what we had.. He was so stuck in his ways and would never let me into his life fully.. I felt like he shut down a lot and I would argue a lot with him about it. I couldn't understand how he would not let me in and we had been together for two years..I think what really did is that he didn't have his life together and I know there are things he wanted to do but just wasn't able to right now because he lost his job.. A year later of up and down rollercoster he starts working but I still felt like he didn't seem interested in us anymore..I asked him recently what is he expecting from our relationship..does he see up with him in the future.. He flipped out and was like oh I never thought about u guys like that before..Which hurt deeply! I was stock..I said I dont' want to get married or move in together right now.. Im just asking so we are on the same page.. he like I don't know ..while we are always together..while I felt that he was a great guy..loving,caring, vey supportive, but left me guessing to much on where he stand.. He would tell me while I do a lot for u and that should be good enough..the hard things about our relationship was him communicating he would not say much but did everything for me.. I have been very patient with him but I didn't like that he could not tell me yes or no if he saw us moving in together or growing together..leaving me guessing where things where going..The comment above said somethinga bout Bull wanting to own their own things like house he was sooo like that.. he's like I need to get my own things (house, finical things, car, etc) before anything..I was like why can't we do that together/ I had my own place, money and car.. he lived with his parents because he lost his job.. I told him one day that he was driving my crazy because he would not open up

Taurus man
Part 2

up about things..he would ask me where I was going and who I was with but he didn't like me asking him..He would say stop questiong me..lol I would go out with him and his family but he never wanted to take me around his friends non wanted to hang out with my friends but came to my family gathering..I got tired of the games and I told him I wasn't happy.. this had been maybe the third time..hoping that he would open up and try to make us work on things..I told him one day Why are we together if your never going let me in??...He didn't say nothing.. He stayed quit then said he wanted to be single..Anyways, we broke up..Im so lost and confuse.. how could he just lose or let us go we had something wonderful—?? I feel like shit... I still talk to him but he says he doesn't want to be in a relationship and wants to be single.. He said he will talk to me but he doesn't want to hear about us because Im only making it harder on him..wtf! He said we tried to work things out but he's not happy and neither I am. He once told that his exs are all crazy.. I think I might now know why because he is a bull and will not buge.. I love him but I hate who is becoming now 🦇 He said there's nothing I can do or

So I DID peg you. I'm even more disgusted. This is the guy you want to have a continuing relationship with your son—? Really?

Don't use your son to keep tabs on someone who doesn't want you in his life. Move the hell on and keep men away from your son in the future.

https://www.dxpnet.com/opinion/relationships/ending-a-relationship-5030870/

Posted by RedAx

he went into depression a lot
He was so stuck in his ways and would never let me into his life fully..
I felt like he shut down a lot and I would argue a lot with him about it.
I think what really did is that he didn't have his life together
I still felt like he didn't seem interested in us anymore..
He flipped out and was like oh I never thought about u guys like that before
the hard things about our relationship was him communicating he would not say much

he's like I need to get my own things (house, finical things, car, etc) before anything..
he lived with his parents because he lost his job..

Yep...every mom in the world would insist their child be with a guy like this after a break up

smfh

Hello RedAx--

I do not condone your Bull's sudden, unexpected lack of regard for you and your son, but I can honestly understand his provisional reasons for not attempting to solidify, openly communicate, or keep you posted on his future plans.

I will not speak for all Bulls.

But If I'm not in a secured financial setting, I avoid relationships (especially demanding ones) altogether. It has nothing to do with the other individual, but everything to do with my insecurities, inadequacies, and lack of direction. RedAx, Bulls are not as abstract as Virgos. I always felt that Virgos made good teachers. More analytical. More objective way at looking for solutions to a problem. Most (not all) Bulls are linear. Fixed. This is where the stubbornness sets in. We see no other alternative way at solving a problem, but a tangible one. One that is conventional, a tried method. A solution that is going to yield the most successful results. We don't care for the mental gymnastics for getting 'paper.' A job, produces money, produces stability, gives us the power to own things, and provide for our families. It's that simple. We can't see it any other way.

The problem you're having with your Bull stems from your own insecurities. Not judging you in no way, Bulls have it too...you feel that if he's not opening up, then you will lose him. If he isn't incorporating you and your son into his life...then you will lose him. This is not necessarily true. The truth is, he simply doesn't have the answers you're looking for. His finances dictates his actions and movements, nothing else. Only a Bull can understand this concept. Virgos see it from more of an abstract point-of-view, "We build." Not a Bull. It's "I build." Naturally Bulls are builders, thus, the mantra for a Taurus "I Have."

My advice, as he's building, make yourself useful in areas that you're needed. Don't get in his way. LOL. But as he's gradually reaching his goal level, communicate more, offer more expertise, allow room for flexibility. As I stated earlier, Virgos are good teachers.

wow ... I feel sorry for the child.

Sounds like the child's mother isn't really looking out for it's well being very well, considering she has let a man she's only known for less than 90 days into the child's life.

Who knows how many strange men she has brought around.

My hope is that a family member realizes that the child is potentially in an emotionally damaging situation and removes the child from the environment this woman has put her own child in.

Posted by RedAx

I still talk to him but he says he doesn't want to be in a relationship and wants to be single.. He said he will talk to me but he doesn't want to hear about us because Im only making it harder on him..wtf! He said we tried to work things out but he's not happy and neither I am. He once told that his exs are all crazy.. I think I might now know why because he is a bull and will not buge.. I love him but I hate who is becoming now 🦇

His hoof-prints are firmly planted on the ground because you're 'pushing' him....

This is manifested in two ways.

He will either raise those horns and chhhhhaaaaarge at you (if you're not a trained Bullfighter, get out of his way when this happens).

OR

Keep his hoof-prints planted on the ground and be inactive. DO nothing. SAY nothing. Which means, in regards to a blossoming relationship with him, you will have NOTHING.

You're a Virgo, patience is your best virtue. Please utilize it. Two months is a relatively short period of time.

Ok everyone there has been a miss understanding??_ I have been with this Taurus guy for the last 2yrs & half. October would have been 3yrs. I'm not trying to bash this guy or put him dwn because he is a great guy and has done sooooo many things for me & my son.. He has taken his to school, teacher his camp, fish, gardening (being a positive male role model)... He has done sooo many wonderful things for me too. . I never asked for much other than him being there for my son n me and loving us.. I'm a very independent lady and usually do not like asking for help and do not want things hand to me??_ I will work my butt off to get what I have ??_ I'm just asking for some advice??_ We bond so well together but there are areas I feel thing can be worked on in our relationship or changed ??_

Taurus Bull1977, I do enjoy reading your feedback.. I do find it to be somewhat true about me having my own insecurities.. about not opening up.. I always feel like it's —WE?? and he would mention —WE & I?? and I never really understood it... why he would say only —I?? sometimes... I was very hurt ??_maybe I pushed him away with my insecurities and too much of —Why NOT WE—?? I always wanted to try and help him& could never see why he would not except my help??_I think you have opened my eyes up to seeing the state of mind he's been in.. You make a good point with the truth is, he simply doesn't have the answers you're looking for. His finances dictates his actions and movements, nothing else. Only a Bull can understand this concept. Virgos see it from more of an abstract point-of-view, "We build." Not a Bull. It's "I build." Naturally Bulls are builders, thus, the mantra for a Taurus "I Have." Maybe I pushed him too much and he's dug his heels ..

Posted by RedAx
Maybe I pushed him too much and he's dug his heels ..

I believe so, too 😉

But he's a Bull, if it's two years invested, he will bounce back. Just give him space to do so. I understand your willingness to want to help. Your genuine sincerity. It's obvious why he's taken with you. But he's proud. He's stubborn. He's a man. A traditional one, too. My brother (who is also a Taurus) would jump off a bridge before he accepts a handout from a woman.

"why he would say only —I?? sometimes..."

"I" simply means, "I build", "I own", "I have", "I provide."

...Just having our shit together before we're truly settled with anyone, especially if there is children involved, or entertaining the possibility of having children in the near future.

He's certainly not going to live off his wife, I can promise you that.

Don't be hurt by the "I" expression. It's a Bull thing. It's just the way we roll. It's isn't exclusionary, just an economical focal point with no immediate distractions.

ETA:
It's =It