won—t consider my feelings

Virgo won't consider my feelings! I have asked him to be more sensitive but he seems to rebel and use the fact that his stressed as an excuse.
I told him there is no point in me taking our relationship seriously if he can't.
It's over stupid things.

1. I don't understand the reason he has too accept so many random adds on face book.
2. His phone rings constantly Girls of course and BUT I never complain.

It's been 10 months and I really don't mind girls calling him because I trust him
Even though if I get a call his face shrivels up and acts as if I'm the worst person in the world.

All I want is for him to take us more seriously seeing though he expects so much from me. Or just tell me straight out what he really see's cause to me
I feel like he is keeping his options open by not cutting off ties.. I met him over the internet so you could imagine how this frustrates me —

How do I go about this? Im a Cancer I bloody have feelings and right now they are hurt!!!

Do you feel better after your vent?

Yeh that's pretty much what I was doing lol. Yes venting does a world of wonders the smallest response is a massive help also lol thanks 🙂 aha

you will be fine like 85 said and im saying this 2 give him a piece of ur mind virgos dont like push overs stand up to him he's doing this because he knows he can get away with it because you will let it roll over ur back then he will keep doing the same foolishness like a never ending cycle.

put ur foot down take charge if that doesn't work tell him you wanna see some change and if that doesn't work you can always do better and find someone that will treat you with respect.


i would never let people walk on me like a sidewalk and neither should you owwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww lmao.

I really fail to see the problem here...

I see the problem... he's being a douche AND you're letting him get away with it ... da da da dom :O

You don't have to complain, just set some ground rules he needs to obey.

First, he must delete all random chics on his page and second he must stop
accepting calls from random chics. Exceptions available, explanations required.

You don't have to sound as demanding as this sounds.. but you get the idea hehe

And second, communication will only work until after stirring up emotion...
so with that being said..... here we have a situation that demands
"a little taste of your own chocolate" 😛

Hope you feel better!

If you deny someone the ability to talk with their friends, they'll probably leave.

It's easier for a girl to fall into bed with a guy than it is for a guy to fall into bed with a girl. Hence his face shrivelling up when you get calls from guys.

In other words, you are more likely to get f**Ked by one of your guy friends than he is with the girls who are his friend.

That is the logic.

Hey, women get half of everything (even if they didn't work right along with the man to build the fortune in the first place) during a divorce, so feminists on here should STFU and let us have this one, okay? lol

What is he not taking seriously? Random adds on facebook?

Are you f**king serious? It's FACEBOOK for christ's sake!

W.T.F?

Your complaints make you sound controlling to me. It also sounds like you're nit-picking.

Prepare for the "We need to talk" speech in the near future, lady.

I'll add my 2 cents for whatever it's worth. I find in general that most men aren't up to no good. They simply ARE. Adding someone on facebook means nothing unless he's constantly chatting, or chatting/having a wank, you get the picture. It means NOTHING. Of all the people I have on myspace, there are really few that I have cottoned too and talk with frequently. And I must tell you something else, women honestly LIKE Virgo men. They are terrific friends because they are empathetic, amusing, but can also bust it down and let you know when the shiz in your life stinks to high heaven.
It is not necessary for you to complain when he gets a ring, it will be in your posture, on your face. Your whole body and vibe will tell him you're PO'd about those phone calls. He is loyal to his friends, do not, I repeat, do NOT force the issue and make him go underground to talk to people. That's unfair and unkind.
It's good that you trust him, because you should. But expecting him to cut everyone off in his life so he can pander to your ego is childish. And it will backfire on you.
Try to put all this rubbish on a mental heap and set fire to it lady, for your own good. You are making yourself nuts, and it will make him nuts. And that is a road you do not want to walk down. If you care about and want to keep this man, you've got to stop. If the calls irk you, leave the room, go for a walk.
But sit down and talk with the man, honestly. Ask how he feels when you get a ring. Make an agreement, let him know "Hey, it's John/Dirk/Steve/Chris on the phone". Let him know none of these men are a threat, just friends. And no sneaky stuff. There's nothing you can't talk about with a friend that your partner can't hear. Good luck to you.

Posted by venusianbull
I'll add my 2 cents for whatever it's worth. I find in general that most men aren't up to no good. They simply ARE. Adding someone on facebook means nothing unless he's constantly chatting, or chatting/having a wank, you get the picture. It means NOTHING. Of all the people I have on myspace, there are really few that I have cottoned too and talk with frequently. And I must tell you something else, women honestly LIKE Virgo men. They are terrific friends because they are empathetic, amusing, but can also bust it down and let you know when the shiz in your life stinks to high heaven.
It is not necessary for you to complain when he gets a ring, it will be in your posture, on your face. Your whole body and vibe will tell him you're PO'd about those phone calls. He is loyal to his friends, do not, I repeat, do NOT force the issue and make him go underground to talk to people. That's unfair and unkind.
It's good that you trust him, because you should. But expecting him to cut everyone off in his life so he can pander to your ego is childish. And it will backfire on you.
Try to put all this rubbish on a mental heap and set fire to it lady, for your own good. You are making yourself nuts, and it will make him nuts. And that is a road you do not want to walk down. If you care about and want to keep this man, you've got to stop. If the calls irk you, leave the room, go for a walk.
But sit down and talk with the man, honestly. Ask how he feels when you get a ring. Make an agreement, let him know "Hey, it's John/Dirk/Steve/Chris on the phone". Let him know none of these men are a threat, just friends. And no sneaky stuff. There's nothing you can't talk about with a friend that your partner can't hear. Good luck to you.

I'm glad someone acknowledges it's an ego thing with some women.

Absolutely it is. 🙂

Posted by RainingPeanuts


I see the problem... he's being a douche AND you're letting him get away with it ... da da da dom :O

How the HELL is he being a douche—?

You don't have to complain, just set some ground rules he needs to obey.

Honestly... you people can't be serious.

First, he must delete all random chics on his page and second he must stop
accepting calls from random chics. Exceptions available, explanations required.

He doesn't have to do a damn thing except love his Cancer girl and be faithful to her.

Posted by Mattofla
If you deny someone the ability to talk with their friends, they'll probably leave.

click to expand

I can personally attest to doing this before, and I would do it again in the blink of an eye.

No one tells me what to do, I only answer to the person who pays my cheque.

So WHAT if girls call him frequently?
So WHAT if he adds them randomly on Facebook?

It doesn't mean jack squat!!!

I'm a Virgo man, and I personally find that I communicate a lot better with females than males. All my female friends are just that, FRIENDS. Not sex buddies, or conquests, FRIENDS. FRIENDS with boyfriends!

I support them, I listen to them, I offer them advice. Nothing more.

Stop being insecure.

IMO you met him online. What did you think!? I mean he's most likely addicted to social networks and talking to random girls and if he met you he's most likely meeting other women as well and honestly you shouldn't have to deal with this shit, if you didn't establish the boundaries in the beginning well you pretty much gave him the greenlight to continue meeting women online.

IMO it's never innocent, it's never he's not going to do anything with anyone, bullshit, if he's flirting online, if he's adding random girls online, if he's talking to random women daily over the phone/online then he's not yours, his actions speak louder than his words, maybe he misled you to believe that you 2 were exclusive but his actions don't say exclusive to one woman, it says I'm available and if he's available to other women then maybe you 2 should consider changing the status of the relationship back to friendship. Enough women here have dated these kind of guys online and gave them the benefit of the doubt to know it's more than innocent behavior.

I don't think he's a douche, I think he's a guy that has a different view of commitment-bf/gf relationships, I do believe he lacks sincerity and empathy for the relationship he's in with you. Maybe it's time to reconsider cutting ties with this guy other than that you have to stand up for yourself and be a bitch about this one and ask him to stop behaving like he's still single.

I don't see how you could have ignored this behavior for 10 months, his behavior is like screetching nails on a chalk board and most women would leave not because he's bad or anything but because he's more interested in finding new women online which is a sure sign he's still hunting and looking that alone would end a relationship pronto.

dump him

And don't fall for that stop being insecure bullshit that's just a way men/women that behave like your boyfriend act to control how another person feels because they don't want to accept responsibility that they may be hurting someone, most women would feel insecure being with a man that continues to hunt and feast off of other women. It's one thing to have a set of platonic friends that were there before you but he's openly dismissing his relationship with you by seeking out random women and also creating a bond with these women online and over the phone. Nope you have a right to feel off balance around any man that says he's committed to you.

I'm curious....Is he openly stating you are his girlfriend on Facebook? Is his status changed to reflect he's in a relationship on FB? Does he make it clear that he's spoken for?

If you want to keep him do what the romans do...I wouldn't make a big deal out of it, If it were me and I didn't want to dump the guy I would follow his lead and call it a day. If he can dish it well he can take it and if he can't take it then he will come to a compromise were you both get what you want so you both can feel secure and happy.

I don't give a fug if I sound chaveunistic. But men have more to fear infidelity wise than women.

So most times a woman is paranoid it's over stupid sh** like facebook?

Good God, ladies.

Most women are too f**king controlling it's all there is to it.

You seem to forget that before you two met, the man had a life and suddenly you think just because you have sex every now and then and label yourselves boyfriend and girlfriend his world should revolve around you and only YOU?

Crazy biatches lol

You will always be unhappy. And as perverse as it sounds, that's probably what gets you wet, anyway.

You know how they say men are simple? Women are too.

All they want to do is feel. How they feel doesn't really matter, long as they're "going through something".

Gives them something to boast/complain about.

Pissed because he adds randoms on facebook?

Sheesh.

Good grief at giving the man rules to "obey".

Get the fug out of here with that crazy controlling bullsh**.

I don't care if a man is a chauvinist or not, to each his own. The bottom line is men/women such as this one need to stay the hell out of committed relationships if all they want to do is be single and act single. It's not so much as what he's doing is wrong, he can do what the hell he wants to do but if he's choosing to couple up there should be a level of understanding and respect for himself and for her. There are way too many men/women that chase commitment only to disrespect it after they get it.

This isn't about a male issue, women do the exact same thing as men and it's shows a level of emotional immaturity and disrespect for others. If he doesn't want to commit himself which means some things have to cease then he can go back to being single and chasing ass till the day is long, if he wants an open poly-relationship then find a girl that can be in that kind of relationship.

&2gedanow I agree with You seem to forget that before you two met, the man had a life and suddenly you think just because you have sex every now and then and label yourselves boyfriend and girlfriend his world should revolve around you and only YOU?

I don't feel any man's life should revolve around a woman it's not healthy for the relationship but there has to be a level of communication that the woman understands her man will continue to seek out and date other women online/offline and that is were many of the relationships begin to fail, the man offers a commitment and then turn around and behaves like he's still single and the woman is confused about her role in his life after she's been given a commitment...there are women that don't mind being in an open relationship but that doesn't mean every woman enjoy these kind of shallow relationships with men.

Are we (women) supposed to automatically know a man is going to be single, act single after he's offered a woman a relationship? And if he's behaving like he's single which technically he is if he's not married then what's the purpose of having a girlfriend? Sex

Enlighten us please....

And for the person who posted this thread anytime you get with a man and he is not honoring you in some way, in a way that makes you feel good, feel safe and secure you distance yourself and/or you leave, you don't sit there and just take it until you explode, you don't have to manage a man's behavior EVER, it's simply you deciding that your not on the same page with a man, it's about observing his love style and his maturity level and understanding you both have different ideas about what commitments means to the both of you and then come to terms with letting it go, it's not about making him wrong because he's not wrong, he' just doing what he wants to do and if what he wants to do feels inappropriate then you exit the door, you don't ever have to talk a man OUT of behaving the way he wants to behave nor do you have to swallow it in silence.

Posted by tiki33
&2gedanow I agree with You seem to forget that before you two met, the man had a life and suddenly you think just because you have sex every now and then and label yourselves boyfriend and girlfriend his world should revolve around you and only YOU?

I don't feel any man's life should revolve around a woman it's not healthy for the relationship but there has to be a level of communication that the woman understands her man will continue to seek out and date other women online/offline and that is were many of the relationships begin to fail, the man offers a commitment and then turn around and behaves like he's still single and the woman is confused about her role in his life after she's been given a commitment...there are women that don't mind being in an open relationship but that doesn't mean every woman enjoy these kind of shallow relationships with men.

Are we (women) supposed to automatically know a man is going to be single, act single after he's offered a woman a relationship? And if he's behaving like he's single which technically he is if he's not married then what's the purpose of having a girlfriend? Sex

Enlighten us please....

Tiki,

I understand your view point, perfectly. My fight isn't against women wanting to know their place in a man's life.

My fight is with women who know where they stand but still nit pick regardless, just to have something to complain about.

People will always get random friend requests on facebook. Adding girls doesn't mean sh**. And anyway we've only heard HER side of the story (she probably adds guys without thinking about it since some women don't even know when they're exhibiting double standards).

She needs to have more than facebook to complain about after 10 months in my opinion. Does he flirt with other girls while she's there? etc etc

To be honest, it sounds to me like the boy is the pretty one in the relationship, hence her paranoia.

If she's his equal in pultritude then it sounds like she's trying to control him.

Who knows, I may be wrong.

One thing I do know just from reading her post is that she does not love him. Women who sound like her aren't coming from a place of genuine love, but fear.

If she did, her words would've been framed differently.

She sounds like she needs a man around to feel like a relevant human being and who can blame her when gender roles keep

Damn dxp.

Anyway, no, women should not put up with bullsh**, this much is true.

HOWEVER, bullsh** is subjective.

I.e this whole facebook thing being blown into proportion.

The guy probably thinks nothing of it.

Who the f**k takes facebook seriously, anyway?

All i'm saying is to the girl it may seem alien, but to the guy it's just an everyday thing.

Like how aquas don't pick up their phones.

So whose opinion should matter more?

The woman's? Because she feels insecure/she has the p**sy therefore calls the shots/that the world should revolve around her?

Or the man's? Because he doesn't quite see where the two of them are going but acknowledges that that's the beauty of it?

Think about it. The man does everything for the relationship to be formed (in most cases), from initiating that first conversation to asking for the woman's hand in marriage.

Even during sex the man does all the work!

And then in between all this he has to be told who he can and cannot speak to by one fish in a sea of millions?

I'm just giving you male logic here.

This is how a man who is in a relationship that does not have friend ship as the foundation thinks.

Posted by &2gedanow
Damn dxp.

Anyway, no, women should not put up with bullsh**, this much is true.

HOWEVER, bullsh** is subjective.

I.e this whole facebook thing being blown into proportion.

The guy probably thinks nothing of it.

Who the f**k takes facebook seriously, anyway?

lol that should read out of proportion hehe

Okay &2gedanow I see your logic, male logic and I won't argue with it nor disagree, your point of view is relevant and I actually understand were your coming from believe it or not.

To all thinking "You're bitter" or "Why are you thinking like this? That's not manly"

It's as simple as "What the f**k do you do?"

That's the question.

Because you can't do little in a relationship and expect the whole world.

If a woman:

1. intuitively knew when a dude was feeling down as opposed to asking "what's on your mind honey?" (annoying question, that)

2. talked about stuff other than Louise the girl at work who was pissing her off

3. got the guy little gifts like the flowers most women expect men to give them which mean nothing at all (not even the gesture counts)

4. actually pinned him down and f**ked him till he passed out

I guarantee that other guys would beat that guy up if he cheated on her.

You need to work, ladies.

Just sitting on your ass doing what you think girls should do (see number one above) and expecting what you think a girl should expect (see number 3 above), won't get you a commited partner.

Commitment is a two way thing.

And f**k society. You're dating Brad, 32, architect, not Generic man.

What you do and how you behave should be personalised.

The above goes for us blokes, too.

Posted by tiki33
Okay &2gedanow I see your logic, male logic and I won't argue with it nor disagree, your point of view is relevant and I actually understand were your coming from believe it or not.

Oh, I never doubted that, Tiki. With aqua chicks, I don't argue, I discuss, since I instinctively know they sympathize.

The scorpio board on the other hand ...

As much as it has permeated popular culture, and I myself enjoy it. Try not to take Facebook too seriously heh.

I know for myself, my friends list has a ton of women I've worked with in the past but it's no indication of being promiscuous.

Posted by &2gedanow
To all thinking "You're bitter" or "Why are you thinking like this? That's not manly"

It's as simple as "What the f**k do you do?"

That's the question.

Because you can't do little in a relationship and expect the whole world.

If a woman:

1. intuitively knew when a dude was feeling down as opposed to asking "what's on your mind honey?" (annoying question, that)

2. talked about stuff other than Louise the girl at work who was pissing her off

3. got the guy little gifts like the flowers most women expect men to give them which mean nothing at all (not even the gesture counts)

4. actually pinned him down and f**ked him till he passed out

I guarantee that other guys would beat that guy up if he cheated on her.

You need to work, ladies.

Just sitting on your ass doing what you think girls should do (see number one above) and expecting what you think a girl should expect (see number 3 above), won't get you a commited partner.

Commitment is a two way thing.

And f**k society. You're dating Brad, 32, architect, not Generic man.

What you do and how you behave should be personalised.

The above goes for us blokes, too.

Agree completely.

Posted by venusianbull

Posted by &2gedanow
To all thinking "You're bitter" or "Why are you thinking like this? That's not manly"

It's as simple as "What the f**k do you do?"

That's the question.

Because you can't do little in a relationship and expect the whole world.

If a woman:

1. intuitively knew when a dude was feeling down as opposed to asking "what's on your mind honey?" (annoying question, that)

2. talked about stuff other than Louise the girl at work who was pissing her off

3. got the guy little gifts like the flowers most women expect men to give them which mean nothing at all (not even the gesture counts)

4. actually pinned him down and f**ked him till he passed out

I guarantee that other guys would beat that guy up if he cheated on her.

You need to work, ladies.

Just sitting on your ass doing what you think girls should do (see number one above) and expecting what you think a girl should expect (see number 3 above), won't get you a commited partner.

Commitment is a two way thing.

And f**k society. You're dating Brad, 32, architect, not Generic man.

What you do and how you behave should be personalised.

The above goes for us blokes, too.

Agree completely.

click to expand

Thank you.

I, &2gedanow, (aka normalisboring) will cease with the voice of reason sh** when it comes to discussions regarding men and women, resorting instead to smileys and a single word to communicate how I feel on the subject from hence forth.

Quote me on that.

Now ... I've got a script to finish ...

Good luck with your script. 🙂 And monosyllabic doesn't quite seem your style .

Posted by venusianbull
Good luck with your script. 🙂 And monosyllabic doesn't quite seem your style .

Thanks, venusianbull. 45 pages more and I've got 90 minutes of film. Hoorah 🙂

Woohooo! Get it! 🙂

Posted by tiki33
I mean he's most likely addicted to social networks and talking to random girls and if he met you he's most likely meeting other women as well and honestly you shouldn't have to deal with this shit

Assumption.

IMO it's never innocent, it's never he's not going to do anything with anyone, bullshit, if he's flirting online, if he's adding random girls online, if he's talking to random women daily over the phone/online then he's not yours

Assumption.

is actions speak louder than his words, maybe he misled you to believe that you 2 were exclusive but his actions don't say exclusive to one woman

Assumption.

I do believe he lacks sincerity and empathy for the relationship he's in with you.

Assumption.

stand up for yourself and be a bitch about this one and ask him to stop behaving like he's still single.

lmao, so a man can't talk to other women?

I don't see how you could have ignored this behavior for 10 months

Assumption.

his behavior is like screetching nails on a chalk board and most women would leave not because he's bad or anything but because he's more interested in finding new women online which is a sure sign he's still hunting and looking that alone would end a relationship pronto.

click to expand

Blatant Assumption.

This is preposterous. Him adding "friends" on Facebook doesn't mean a damn thing.
You are making ridiculous and plentiful assumptions that may be so far off from the actual case, it isn't funny.

Posted by tiki33
And don't fall for that stop being insecure bullshit that's just a way men/women that behave like your boyfriend act to control how another person feels because they don't want to accept responsibility that they may be hurting someone, most women would feel insecure being with a man that continues to hunt and feast off of other women.

Assumption.
He is NOT hurting her, SHE is HURTING herself by letting her mind run wild!!!

She clearly doesn't trust him.

It's one thing to have a set of platonic friends that were there before you but he's openly dismissing his relationship with you by seeking out random women and also creating a bond with these women online and over the phone. Nope you have a right to feel off balance around any man that says he's committed to you.

Assumption.
This is too funny... just because he has lots of female friends, he's automatically "seeking out random women".... sigh

If it were me and I didn't want to dump the guy I would follow his lead and call it a day. If he can dish it well he can take it and if he can't take it then he will come to a compromise were you both get what you want so you both can feel secure and happy.

click to expand

That's horribly immature.

Posted by &2gedanow
I don't give a fug if I sound chaveunistic. But men have more to fear infidelity wise than women.

So fricking true.

You seem to forget that before you two met, the man had a life and suddenly you think just because you have sex every now and then and label yourselves boyfriend and girlfriend his world should revolve around you and only YOU?

Tell 'em

You will always be unhappy. And as perverse as it sounds, that's probably what gets you wet, anyway.

lmfao

All they want to do is feel. How they feel doesn't really matter, long as they're "going through something".

Gives them something to boast/complain about.

Sickeningly true...

Pissed because he adds randoms on facebook?

Sheesh.

click to expand

Pathetic...

lol Cajunspirit I zoomed through the last topic out of boredom and I read.

ASSUMPTIONS

ASSUMPTIONS

ASSUMPTIONS

ASSUMPTIONS

ASSUMPTIONS

BLATANT ASSUMPTIONS

Just Thought it was funny 😛

Sorry for being random, I'll leave this topic now.