The Cancer Male Virgo Female dynamic

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9/26/2012 1:46:37 AM | More
HighTide

male

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FxXRkqXf

YES IT DOES WORK,but it only works when starting off together in a friendship/kinda like each quietly at a distance dynamic. I am on my third Virgo and I finally started to look at it like Capricorn does and just admire the Virgo good and rule the bad out as just things Virgos do that are head scratching to some signs but not their intention and to not bring it up again.

My beef with Virgos has always been that they don't take into account the emotional side to their decisions.I feel this comes across cold but its really a defense mechanism that is more effective than what the Cancer has. We are tough people but take out any emotional leeway we have, then we are powerless. The Virgo's mechanism works the best and can't be matched to how the rest of the zodiac reacts in the fire. I have learned to not pick fights with a Virgo Woman as they tough as nails on the inside and outsmart me every time. The Leo Woman is tough as nails on the outside, but I can melt any like butter without even trying.

As a Cancer Male the Virgo female cannot fulfill me in a romantic way off the bat as she is going to do what she feels needs to be no matter what society thinks. This trait is hard on me because I do care what society thinks, a little too much but I can't just not care at all like I want to.The helpful/nuturing qualities of the Virgo woman want them around me at all times so I am willing to let the Cancer criticism go to an extent since IT IS WORTH IT EVEN IF MY EMOTIONS ARE SCRAMBLED SOMETIMES. I just can't expect them to fill my mold until enough time has passed in their mind. Virgos need even more time than a Cancer to trust and they are just as scared as us, but their wall is more a test of what true love really is. "Are you going to love me if I do this,and many other things you don't approve of ", as for Cancer is more of a "Let me obligate you so I can have the ammo when u hurt me". Are's isn't the best but we do it because we don't like to be left alone after caring for someone so deeply. My last Virgo brought me to my knees as a man as I realized can't handle the Virgo breakup pattern psychologically. So I am now on the vibe where I keep my options(as does she)until the Virgo feels they can take it to the next level and where I am to the realm where they do care about what I think, but that is only reserved to people they feel worthy and proven.
9/26/2012 2:17:43 AM | More
HighTide

male

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FxXRkqXf

also this music video makes me think of how the the Cancer/Virgo dynamic can be for fun



9/26/2012 8:12:19 AM | More
incandescentcancer

male

This is a very interesting dynamic and I actually kinda love it like chess. But to begin with the problem I have observed in this relationship is that Cancer falls too fast for the Virgo and doesn't know how to maintain studious indifference on the outside. If you want any chance of winning a Virgo woman maintain a slight distance (not too much) and don't put your emotions on exhibition. This is kind of easier for me since I have moon in Aquarius (one of the coldest moons). Virgo women need the feeling that THEY analysed and made a choice, if you chase she won't give in. They have this habit of pricking you with a pin and retreating to observe what you do (and believe me they know the sweet spot to prick). My view with Virgo women has always been that if you want games, bring it and bring your friends too, I will take you on with no issues (Cardinal signs are not born to lose). So my point is even if you like her just put her under observation and maintain some distance, let her initiate plans etc. Make her call you, if you chase her she gone baby...

Secondly, Cancers tend to forget this when they fall for a Virgo. YOU are the treetrunking CARDINAL sign not her! It is your duty to rule and lead, Virgos are mutable and based on their placements will follow your leadership once you display the indomitable strength of your heart Cancer. Shine like the Sun in your natural pursuits independently and she will want to be part of it and come to you. Virgos need to feel needed and when they see your ability to shine like that on your own they will somehow want to fit themselves into your orbit. This is where I see Cancers (including me on occasions) lose balance and forget our Cardinal nature to try and change for the Virgo. Again if you try to change for her instead of maintaining your leadership, she gone...

9/26/2012 8:17:11 AM | More
incandescentcancer

male

Lastly, Virgos are going to end a relationship with one fell stroke of the surgical knife. They will NOT lead you on since they think it's a waste of time and energy. You can avoid this though, the key being communication, Virgos like to talk and then rationalize things in their heads. A Cancer has the unparalleled ability to sense things going wrong, use it. When you can feel that things are off immediately talk to your Virgo and this will prevent the whole "breaking down on your knees" thing from happening. Virgos allow things to build for some time and then wham they hit you all in one go, so never let the build up happen, talk to her and melt her from the inside out before things get hot. They are very reasonable people and when you talk and sort things out nobody puts things behind them as fast as a Virgo can. Cancers tend to hold on to something and allow it to fester, you got to lose that habit for a healthy relationship with a virgo. As soon as something upsets you or you think she is upset, talk to her (give her a day's space, it usually works) briefly but solidly and trust me you will never have to break down on your knees again!
9/26/2012 10:20:21 AM | More
Peanutbutter

from the Wine Country, California  

+1 all across the (message)board .

Keeo the cancerian insight coming guys!
9/26/2012 10:26:11 AM | More
Peanutbutter

from the Wine Country, California  

I must say, I have a lot of air and fire in my chart & am as you described. I express my interest in potential partners pretty openly most of the.time (especially w/ you Crabs, you guys just bring my soft side out somehow) & I do not mind PDA so long as its kept classy lol.

My current beau is all Cancer w/ the exception of his moon (Leo) & mars (Libra). I have a Leo moon & Libra Venus & our styles mesh well so far! I am one happy gal. I must say he is very affectionate, sensitive, and wants to b around me all the time . I feel like he's my perfect fit! Xo

9/26/2012 10:43:36 AM | More
incandescentcancer

male

^^ I am Cancer with all air and fire placement (except sun and mercury in Cancer) plus the aquarian moon plays havoc with my personality ...lol. But I see what you mean on PDA, I am usually not very forward with PDA but if a girl initiates it I wont act like a prude/jerk. But lack of PDA doesn't mean I act like her brother either...lol, I think everyone usually knows the moment they see us together. It's kind of hard to explain.

It's strange but every time I meet a virgo woman I always see this cute, sensitive little girl inside her and I want to draw that girl out. I think that's what most Cancer men somehow see in a Virgo woman and hence the great sensitivity and care they shower on them. However I have also come across nasty virgo women who have tried to take advantage of this, in which case I won't forget and will pay back ruthlessly (not very Cancer there..).
9/26/2012 12:51:13 PM | More
LostinmyMind11

30 years old female

Sun 11°37' Virgo

I ♥ you cancers!
9/27/2012 3:49:05 AM | More
Peanutbutter

from the Wine Country, California  

Posted by incandescentcancer
^^ I am Cancer with all air and fire placement (except sun and mercury in Cancer) plus the aquarian moon plays havoc with my personality ...lol. But I see what you mean on PDA, I am usually not very forward with PDA but if a girl initiates it I wont act like a prude/jerk. But lack of PDA doesn't mean I act like her brother either...lol, I think everyone usually knows the moment they see us together. It's kind of hard to explain.


Totally rings a bell my Cancer thinks I'm the cutest hehe
9/27/2012 3:52:46 AM | More
Peanutbutter

from the Wine Country, California  

Plus no matter where we go he always guides me by touching my lower back ever so lightly.. hehe.. we still haven't held hands (in public) but otherwise it's pretty evident that were together. I gave him a kiss on the cheek in public! Lol, totally not a big deal to those who r used to playing tonsil hockey in public but it was def s big step for myself since I'm neva eva eva that affectionate w/ anyone in the open! It kinda feels good!
9/27/2012 9:45:21 AM | More
incandescentcancer

male

Posted by Peanutbutter
Plus no matter where we go he always guides me by touching my lower back ever so lightly.. hehe.. we still haven't held hands (in public) but otherwise it's pretty evident that were together. I gave him a kiss on the cheek in public! Lol, totally not a big deal to those who r used to playing tonsil hockey in public but it was def s big step for myself since I'm neva eva eva that affectionate w/ anyone in the open! It kinda feels good!


Hahhahaha, I do the first part too, the light touch to the lower back. The idea is to let her know that I am there and not to worry about anything. I am usually comfortable with a kiss on the cheek, I don't even mind a genuine kiss in public (don't mean slobbering over eachother but a more dignified kiss). I am just not comfortable with grabbing eachother in public or touching inappropriately etc. I think it's a bit much and it's uncomfortable for the people around as well.

9/27/2012 10:18:26 AM | More
Virggy

19 years old female from Richmond

It's funny this thread pops up. I have two friends and both of them have virgo/cancer parents. First friend, a Leo, has a Virgo dad and Cancer mom. There are a lot of factors to consider in their marriage of course, but looking at it just astrologically, it's not the best match. My friend's mom is a super sensitive and emotional Cancer woman. (It might be so extreme because of other chart placements, but I haven't done her chart so I can't speak on those). It's clear that the Virgo dad really doesn't fully get her (could also be because of other chart placements). They can easily be at odds, and the Cancer takes it personally and immediately reacts. Virgo takes it personally but doesn't address it immediately. He might let it fester for awhile. Lots of cold, awkward silences over dinner.

On the other side, my Libra friend has a Virgo mom and Cancer dad. They met and married young. But they had her later in life (mid forties I want to say). Virgo woman honestly to me seems like she nearly hates the guy. Cancer dad is very impulsive, fun-loving, maybe even a little immature for his age (which is like 60). I personally think he's a fun guy but I don't have to spend all day, every day with him either. But yeah, the Virgo woman seems more ready to share and express herself when she's upset (as opposed to the Virgo dad above). She yells at him a lot, he laughs it off. But hey, they're still together so either it's not that bad, or they're stuck. I haven't figured it out yet.

These are older couples I'm referring to,but I guess speaking in generalities the astrology applies. It sounds like a good dynamic to me, on paper. But once I actually experienced being around these couples for extended lengths of time, I had second thoughts. I still want to believe it can work though >.>
9/27/2012 10:22:46 AM | More
virgodreamz

female

Posted by incandescentcancer
Lastly, Virgos are going to end a relationship with one fell stroke of the surgical knife. They will NOT lead you on since they think it's a waste of time and energy. You can avoid this though, the key being communication, Virgos like to talk and then rationalize things in their heads. A Cancer has the unparalleled ability to sense things going wrong, use it. When you can feel that things are off immediately talk to your Virgo and this will prevent the whole "breaking down on your knees" thing from happening. Virgos allow things to build for some time and then wham they hit you all in one go, so never let the build up happen, talk to her and melt her from the inside out before things get hot. They are very reasonable people and when you talk and sort things out nobody puts things behind them as fast as a Virgo can. Cancers tend to hold on to something and allow it to fester, you got to lose that habit for a healthy relationship with a virgo. As soon as something upsets you or you think she is upset, talk to her (give her a day's space, it usually works) briefly but solidly and trust me you will never have to break down on your knees again!



Wow you know your Virgos!
9/27/2012 10:55:33 AM | More
incandescentcancer

male

Posted by virgodreamz
Posted by incandescentcancer
Lastly, Virgos are going to end a relationship with one fell stroke of the surgical knife. They will NOT lead you on since they think it's a waste of time and energy. You can avoid this though, the key being communication, Virgos like to talk and then rationalize things in their heads. A Cancer has the unparalleled ability to sense things going wrong, use it. When you can feel that things are off immediately talk to your Virgo and this will prevent the whole "breaking down on your knees" thing from happening. Virgos allow things to build for some time and then wham they hit you all in one go, so never let the build up happen, talk to her and melt her from the inside out before things get hot. They are very reasonable people and when you talk and sort things out nobody puts things behind them as fast as a Virgo can. Cancers tend to hold on to something and allow it to fester, you got to lose that habit for a healthy relationship with a virgo. As soon as something upsets you or you think she is upset, talk to her (give her a day's space, it usually works) briefly but solidly and trust me you will never have to break down on your knees again!



Wow you know your Virgos!


Virgo mum besides I also learnt hrough hard knocks from other virgo women (very turbulent relations)
9/27/2012 10:58:08 AM | More
incandescentcancer

male

Posted by Virggy
It's funny this thread pops up. I have two friends and both of them have virgo/cancer parents. First friend, a Leo, has a Virgo dad and Cancer mom. There are a lot of factors to consider in their marriage of course, but looking at it just astrologically, it's not the best match. My friend's mom is a super sensitive and emotional Cancer woman. (It might be so extreme because of other chart placements, but I haven't done her chart so I can't speak on those). It's clear that the Virgo dad really doesn't fully get her (could also be because of other chart placements). They can easily be at odds, and the Cancer takes it personally and immediately reacts. Virgo takes it personally but doesn't address it immediately. He might let it fester for awhile. Lots of cold, awkward silences over dinner.

On the other side, my Libra friend has a Virgo mom and Cancer dad. They met and married young. But they had her later in life (mid forties I want to say). Virgo woman honestly to me seems like she nearly hates the guy. Cancer dad is very impulsive, fun-loving, maybe even a little immature for his age (which is like 60). I personally think he's a fun guy but I don't have to spend all day, every day with him either. But yeah, the Virgo woman seems more ready to share and express herself when she's upset (as opposed to the Virgo dad above). She yells at him a lot, he laughs it off. But hey, they're still together so either it's not that bad, or they're stuck. I haven't figured it out yet.

These are older couples I'm referring to,but I guess speaking in generalities the astrology applies. It sounds like a good dynamic to me, on paper. But once I actually experienced being around these couples for extended lengths of time, I had second thoughts. I still want to believe it can work though >.>


Oh yeah, I am with you on this. There is no real guarantee that because the sun signs are Virgo and Cancer it will work out. Personalities, all the chart placements, background and level of maturity etc matters a lot. I recently wanted to date a virgo girl who had plent of scorpio placements and I have all fire and air signs, how do you think that went? Now we actually actively dislike eachother and are in a permanent state of cold war. So I am totally with you when you say that just the sun signs don't mean that virgos and cancers will instantly fall in love.
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