aquas...initiating plans

The aqua guy I am seeing has started to take less intitiave in making plans with me. The last few times we hung out, it was my suggestion to hang in the first place....we are not in a defined relationship, and I still have not had a discussion about this any time recently with him, because I truly think it will have the opposite effect on him....and he'll end up running away like he has in all of his past relationships when women pressured him to give more than he could give. I like hanging out with him, and besides 1 night in the past 6 months, he has always said yes to plans...I'm starting to feel like since I've been the one to intiate more lately, it's going to always be on me and he's going to assume that I will always take control to make plans. Do aquas hang out with people that they're not interested in or if they don't think there is potential? I believe he must be interested in me and genuinely like my company because he has been very responsive, but it started off with him making all of the plans...and the moment I showed disinterest or annoyance, even if it was just a little look, he would pick up the phone immediately and make an effort. Somehow, I've lost all of that control! I feel like if I don't call him for a week now, or 2 weeks, he will probably call, but possibly not intiate anything becuase he's so used to me asking or planning...anyway for me to turn this around? I thought I was unhappy about our friendship/arrangement, but I'm really ok with this friends with benefits thing...I'm a libra and I'm not totally sure about things and I'm scared to get too emotionally involved...I'm in this because I think there is potential, but I don't want to rush it or push it...if it happens, it happens...do aquas feel that way about relatinoships too?

You need to go and get what you want.

MEaning....? Continue initating without expecting him too?

Meaning getting in a mutualistic symbiotic relationship.

He not taking you seriously, because you arent taking you seriously.

I guess sometimes I'd like things to be more defined...and other times I don't mind the way they are.

You do mind...all the time. It just doesnt feel like it when your actually with him.

Hmm...good point. Maybe I've misinterpreted some of the information on here about aquas...I realize these are just suggestions, but I think I got carried away thinking they need their space...so I gave it to him....I don't mind giving him space, but there's a difference between space, and actually making an effort.

I should still expect to know where I stand with someone, regardless of their sign and needs according to the zodiac.

Lady M, may I ask what is going on with you and your libra man? Are you in a relationship with him?

"I should still expect to know where I stand with someone, regardless of their sign and needs according to the zodiac."

of course! Thats my whole point. Understand where his head is at; then Get what you want!...with or with out him.

There are other men out there who lay good pipe and willing to claim you simultaneously. Go and find him.



Oh no, Im not dating a libra at the moment. The guy I spoke of the other day in the other thread is JUST a male friend (I know its confusing, but I have plenty of platonic male relationships)...an aggravating male friend!

WEll, you're right about other men out there....but this one is truly so kind, and genuine...he really is. But I'm not going to limit myself, I am still very open to meeting new people...but I know that I'm not ready for a long term relationship, Ive been in 3 serious relationships, I'm 28- and only now do I feel like I'm discovering myself as an indepedent person...I like not having an emotionally needy man, or relationship that is unbalanced....so this is why I come off as conflicted...this type of relationship works for him because I know that he is not ready, and neither am I. I think there is no chance he would be hanging out with me, if he didn't think there was potential...but I could be wrong! haha...oh well, I'm going to take it for what it is in my life right now, light and fun. IF I meet someone else, I would surely go out on other dates, but I think this type of relationship is all I can handle right now. I just got out of a 4 1/2 yr relationship last at the end of last summer. Before that, I was in a 1 yr relationship, and in college a 3 yr.....I need to keep him at a distance...and he is busy with his life. For once, I'm hanging with someone who is not influencing my future decisions (in an unhealthy way I mean)...and it does feel good, but definitely foreign to me! I spent last night with him, we played the Wii all night and watched our fav tv shows...I am satisfied- and realized that last night...but it's so not what I'm used to that I tend to question things a lot more. First guy who isn't ALL about me, ALL of the time! MAybe that's a good thing for right now! And the sex...well, it's still truly amazing. Can't give That up right now!!!!! Thanks for ur help

Men have it great now. Women are more aggressive than ever. As long as you're decent looking, you pretty much have the pick of the liter. Never be that available for a guy, he will take advantage of it since there are tons of beautiful women in bars willing to give a decent looking guy anything he wants, THAT night. Women are coming off as desperate to a lot of men so we take what we want but do we treasure it? NO! We only cherish those who cherish themselves. We may have to work harder for it but that's how we like it if we're looking for something real. You may get to spend some time with him but you may be a 'filler' until he finds what he's really looking for. Decide what you want to be.

Anytime. 🙂
Stay happy.

Dont fool yourself.

What was that comment aimed at Lady M?

I was just bringing back old threads to get rid of SBY's Idiot threads.

But I think it still fits in the overall gist of the thread.

Well, we still have not had any sort of talk....but my aqua has been initiating a little bit more as of late. Friday night, he called me and joined my friends and I out, and last night he called- we spoke for 2 hrs before he asked me to come over and hang out so we could watch our favorite show together! I brought over cookie mix and we baked cookies, played cards and watched our tv shows...it was a great night....I know that many of you on here believe I should tell my aqua what I want and need, and I tried the other day to bring up a topic over email, but in a joking way. I noticed the last few times I hung out with him, he never comes near me, touches me or hugs me unless we are getting to a point of hooking up. We hang out, and he has seemed to be very nervous or shy about touching me in any way during our time together (i'm talking about in private of course)...in public i wouldn't expect much hand holding etc...so I wrote him a joking email, kind of serious but in a light manner, about how some sort of physical contact would be nice..hugging/kissin anything really...I explained that I was a phsyically affectionate person, and that's how I express myself when I like someone. Well, last night, as soon as I walked in the door, he took my bags from my hand, and gave me a huge hug and a kiss...the whole night, he made sure he was close to me physically, either touching my leg or putting his arm around my shoulders when we were sitting on the couch. All this time, I felt slightly rejected because he didn't seem comfortable around me...and last night, this all changed. I know this may seem like only a little progress, but for him to be able to show me affection after so long, I can see he is finally opening up. I know we will have to have a conversation about us, at some point...and clearly define what is going on between us...but I find that when things are brought up lightly, with not too much emotion, these aquas seem to respond much better!