why yes, i would like a slice of pineapple!

good people of the aquarius board, i wish to pose a question. one that has been posed many times before. in life, i mean. i dunno about here. but anyways...

which is better: to have no friends, or to have a bunch of really crappy friends?

if at all possible, please avoid responses such as "NEITHER LOL!!1" the question is obviously phrased as an extreme, so imagine that you are forced to choose and there is no neither, for all intensive purposes.

explain logic/benefits please.

^ for sb

ofa, totally fine if i'm getting to nosey here and you don't even want to go into it, but i have to ask what exactly was the "straw that broke the camel's back"?

"good people of the aquarius board, i wish to pose a question. one that has been posed many times before. in life, i mean. i dunno about here. but anyways...

which is better: to have no friends, or to have a bunch of really crappy friends? "


NEITH-


"if at all possible, please avoid responses such as "NEITHER LOL!!1" the question is obviously phrased as an extreme, so imagine that you are forced to choose and there is no neither, for all intensive purposes."

...Well, just how crappy are we talking about here? Leaving-me-stranded-in-an-unfamiliar-city-to-score-with-a-chick crappy? Consistently late to meetings? Doesn't pay his share for the alchohol/pizza?

"NEITH-"

heheh...i am talking crappy in exactly the way that sb described. totally superficial and will never actually be there for you when you are in need. also, the terms self-absorbed, incapable of compassion, and devoid of consideration for others may enter the mix.

"the terms self-absorbed, incapable of compassion, and devoid of consideration for others may enter the mix."

Oh, we should get along famously then.😛

Seriously, I used to hang with people like those. One of them seriously told us a "hilarious" story of how he kicked a small dog into the air*. Should be alright as long as you have clear boundries and don't take them too seriously.

*not to mention how another one of them wiped his ass with the Israeli flag. I thought that was pretty amusing, but I know some people who would've beaten him bloody.😛

yama, that friend of yours must be a leo. he clearly needs loads of attention to feel validated.

sb - so basically what you are saying is that it is better to interact with people on a superficial basis, according to their terms and whims and desires, than to give them the old screw you so that they will poke you on facebook?

i think i may be misunderstanding something, because i certainly don't understand how their memory of you accounts for anything if they won't do shit for you.

What is it that you need them to do for you?

i don't need anyone to do anything for me. that's exactly the point i'm trying to make.

in terms of friendship that is.

ofa, i hear ya. it seems to me that almost no ones know what a friend is anymore. the term has lost meaning, because it's so overused.

oh - and i don't blame you at all for the decision you made. i know how it feels to a t.

What do you want from your friends, then? To take notes for you when you're ill? To cheer you up when you're down? To be polite to you on all occasions? Where is the line drawn between the crappy and the non-crappy?

nope, sadly, it happens all over the place. people are different, but the same wherever you go.

"What do you want from your friends, then? To take notes for you when you're ill? To cheer you up when you're down? To be polite to you on all occasions? Where is the line drawn between the crappy and the non-crappy?"

for me, the line is drawn with deliberately taking a.) thoughtless action which hurts your "friend" without the intention of doing so, but only if consequently the act-or refuses to see how they have harmed their "friend" and take actions to right it (self-absorbed, inconsiderate behavior topped with unwillingness to mend wrongs) and b.) malicious action with the intention of hurting your "friend"

"People are ungrateful."

by nature?

"Hey is it your birthday today? Or yesterday or something? I noticed your age changed!"

my birthday isn't until tuesday. apparently dxp just changes everyone's birthday of a particular sign when that sign rules, or whatever you call it.

which is kinda weird to me, but then again astrology is pretty much about the generalization. 😛

if it is subconscious than all it should take is making them aware of their ungratefulness, right?

i get what you're saying. but the unbalance is just so FRUSTRATING. it's one of those things that i slightly neurotic person like myself would endeavor to change, even if it isn't possible. but then again, how can we know what's possible and what isn't without testing the limits? haha...i'm fucked. damn aqua moon. or something.

my boss said something today that i found very interesting. she said to me in casual conversation (in closest to an actual quote that my memory allows), "i shudder to think of being a mental health counselor. i see people walking down the street that would potentially be my clients and i just think to myself, 'wow, i could never take them seriously.' and i know it's serious and you, like, go to hell for thinking stuff like that, but it's true. you have to tell people who will never function normally that it's ok, and that being normal isn't that important. but it is. it is important."

this is coming from a woman whose father was a vicious alcoholic, whose sister is currently addicted to "various substances" (including heroine and cocaine), and who works with what has popularly been termed as broken families on a daily basis.

http://media.photobucket.com/image/no% 20friends/golddragonfire/friends.jpg?o=49" target="_blank">

That's a tough question though. I plead the fifth.

No friends. Cull the deadwood.

Start again.

Before you do, buy; 'Life's too fucking short' by Janet Street Porter.

"I know you, but you're evil so stay away from me because you give me hives"

I call that one 'family'.

Being stabbed hurts wherever it comes from.

But 'ignorance is the source of all misery'. Better to know the truth and hurt for a while, then heal the wound. You will never be stabbed there again. If you are, it won't hurt any more.

I just hope no-one decided to tell me a lot of truths at the same time.

That's like a multiple-stabbing frenzy.

ok so...wait a second. i don't see honesty/criticism/whatever as "stabbing" at all, and i don't really think that's what the quote means either. so i'm assuming he means there's no such thing as a "true friend" because everyone will "stab" you at some point anyway, but the "nice" ones will make you aware beforehand. idk if i would like this oscar wilde fellow, he seems pretty cynical and i have enough cynicism to go around as it is.

What if the other person really does have a knife?

You know, like the saying 'The pen is mightier than the sword' (unless the other person really does have a sword)

"The penis! Mightier than the sword!"

But harder to make those 'swoooooosh' and 'kaching!' sounds with.

brutus was a cool guy. just a little on the slow side.

"i don't really think that's what the quote means either. so i'm assuming he means there's no such thing as a "true friend" because everyone will "stab" you at some point anyway"

Isn't a true friend, someone that tells you something because they believe it will help .. i.e. it comes from a good place? If they have your interests at heart, they want to be a good friend.

Whether they are right or wrong can be put under scrutiny by talking about it. If they are a good friend, they will be as open to your views as you are to theirs.

My best friend says things that sometimes hurt, but he's a good enough friend that I trust 100% that he means well, even when he's wrong.

i just see the term stabbing as something deliberate.

but i dig whatchyu sayin

"brutus was a cool guy. just a little on the slow side."

They were all a bit slow I think. I would have done that thing where you grab the wrist, then slowly turn it around so that the dagger faces the enemy, then you struggle and have a few good gurning head shots to camera, then you both shake your arms for a bit, then it ends up in the attackers belly.

It's a good move.