Aries man broke up

He broke up. He sent me the message via text, and our lives are not exactly collided in order for me to appear around and show him any improvements or 'new beginning' as all the astrology sites are saying. Basically, if we break up and there is no inte
tinoMay 19, 2018 12:27pm
60 replies
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  • tino
    Pisces sun, Sagittarius moon, Scorpio rising
    He broke up.

    He sent me the message via text, and our lives are not exactly collided in order for me to appear around and show him any improvements or 'new beginning' as all the astrology sites are saying. Basically, if we break up and there is no intertwining, we won't be seeing each other and appearing in each other's life anymore.

    He went out with a woman last night, and he said it was nothing romantically involved. For many previous times, he didn't exactly show his trustworthiness, I - a Pisces - couldn't give him any credit and asked him 2, 3 times about the event. He didn't want to explain so he shut down completely and became angry with me. He ignored, and actively told me to go home. Then, when I drove home, he texted a break-up message. We have been dating for 2 months, and last week he was so in love with me. Lots of texting, talking, everything he initiated. He asked me if I was okay, he advised me with my job issues, and he cared for me. I too, cared for him and rarely made him angry before. But after this one incident, he broke up just like that. He said we were not great for each other regarding to romantic relationship, he appreciated things I've done for him and he welcomes me to visit him but as a friend only.

    His angry is not like shouting and verbally insulting, only silence and actions. So now, just this one incident, he wanted to break up. I still hung the break-up text don't know what to answer in order to get him back.

    @Brittnie fyi, thank you for everything you have advised me. but I guess this is the end, I can't think anything to respond to him and get him back properly. This is a quote in his break-up text:

    "We need to stop being like this. Your behavior doesn't fit with me, and I extremely hate that kind of behavior. Even though you were always nice with me, but I don't think romantic relationship fits you and me. Don't try to push me answering what I don't like, I basically didn't do anything wrong to explain myself. I still like you, and welcome you visit my place, but not as my lover. Everything you have sacrificed for me, I know, I'm sorry if I can't do anything more for you. You're smart, you can handle everything."
  • AriesJo
    Aries Sun, Aries Moon, Capricorn Rising
    You don’t have to get back to him. He might message you in a week or so when he’s calmed down. Personally I think silence is the best response to this.
    But you said he’s not trustworthy anyway? So give yourself a moment to kinda think about what you want too.
  • tino
    Pisces sun, Sagittarius moon, Scorpio rising
    @AriesJo I haven't seen him like this before. Long story short, he's 26 and he has 2 previous romances in which his previous partners ended up dumping him and scarred his heart. I thought he was not the let-go type, and that was where I got everything confused. I know, he's too grown up to make such an irrational decision like that, but somehow, he only made it few hours later yesterday when he was still in his fuse...not to mention in his break-up text, one line he explained his anger & one line he broke up. So I'm confused, I believe if he really wanted to cut things off he didn't need to explain that much, it was more like pointing out what was wrong with me for my correction and apology. Later at 11pm yesterday, he posted a Facebook story of a candle we bought together at a garage sale earlier yesterday morning.

    Yes, he did have his flaws, and for which flaws he made, we moved on together and I always looked forward to our future. He slowly progressed our relationship by taking me to where he'd gone with his ex, and we had lots of fun, room to breathe, lots of touches and kisses,...We were so great, and I only made him angry once (last time, he got angry with me driving too fast making him feel ill - his testing water anger when we first dated). I tell you, up until Friday, we were still laughing and kissing, and now after needing some explanations from his action, he cut everything off cause he didn't like that one kind of behaviour.

    Now part of me thinks I should say something at least an apology to let him know I am sorry for the problem I caused and I would not make it again, maybe when I don't say anything just seen, he would think I'm being stubborn and wouldn't admit my fault and even hate me more. But I am also afraid that if I say it out, he will think it's a beg for return and he will be more distant or completely shut off. Should I give him space and time, like a week and then apologize sincerely? Or should I say it now, despite him getting over the incident or not?
    Is there a way @AriesJo ?
  • RESPECT PEOPLE WISHES TO NOT TO WANT TO BE WITH YOU!!!
    Wtf? He said it all! At least you have closure! He said ‘that’s it!’
    What else to discuss?
  • tino
    Pisces sun, Sagittarius moon, Scorpio rising
    @Gemitati Let's get this clear. I understand there is love and there is closure, I am just trying to figure out if there's anything I can respond to his break-up text, it'd be absurd to be with someone for a long time and a partner just drops things like that without thinking twice. In a healthy, normal relationship, people do things to hold on, I'm not trying to do things to upset him or force him anything, just a simple, nice answer to at least...try to save our memories. I'm in that part of my recovery state, so I'm sorry if I'm hurt and can't get the bigger picture.
  • LadyNeptune
    🌵🍋🌿
    Cringe
  • Posted by tino
    @Gemitati Let's get this clear. I understand there is love and there is closure, I am just trying to figure out if there's anything I can respond to his break-up text, it'd be absurd to be with someone for a long time and a partner just drops things like that without thinking twice. In a healthy, normal relationship, people do things to hold on, I'm not trying to do things to upset him or force him anything, just a simple, nice answer to at least...try to save our memories. I'm in that part of my recovery state, so I'm sorry if I'm hurt and can't get the bigger picture.


    I understand how hard it is to let go especially as a fellow water sign but please understand that this is the end. It will take a while to process but you're never going to start that process if you continue to try to find any loopholes to draw him back in. Furthermore you're going to kick yourself if you send him a message and his reply is bluntly hurtful, then you're going to wish you had said nothing and left it alone as your last memory of him will be a not so good one and you don't want that.

    So leave things as they are and like someone else said be appreciative that you got closure and the ending was as pleasant as an ending could be. Trying to drag it out and continue to hold on is only going to hurt you especially if he already seeing someone else which I'm sure he is. So you would just be feeding your yourself more rejection as his focus is not going to turn back to you, he's going on about his life with someone else and yes its a hard pill to swallow but you have to do it.

    Not to mention you don't want to be with someone who is not sure about you because its never going to work long term. Someone will come along that is sure about you and you are what they want after you accept this as a lesson and move on. You don't deserve to be an option and when you believe that within yourself then you won't be treated as such. Start working on yourself good luck!
  • Posted by tino
    @Gemitati Let's get this clear. I understand there is love and there is closure, I am just trying to figure out if there's anything I can respond to his break-up text, it'd be absurd to be with someone for a long time and a partner just drops things like that without thinking twice. In a healthy, normal relationship, people do things to hold on, I'm not trying to do things to upset him or force him anything, just a simple, nice answer to at least...try to save our memories. I'm in that part of my recovery state, so I'm sorry if I'm hurt and can't get the bigger picture.


    2 months is a long term?
    You are delusional! He gave you more explanation that some men do to their wives!
    Just suck it up! Leave him to be.
    Accept it! He said you aren’t what he needs! The end!
  • tino
    Pisces sun, Sagittarius moon, Scorpio rising
    @Cancer-Lady I'm crying reading your advice. Not because it's not good, but it's so good to the point every truth hurts. I will kick myself if his reply is hurtful, I sure am and I know he's fully capable of...and as my past experience with 2 Geminis, I don't want that to happen just once more time. I keep remembering all the memories we have together, in a very long time I feel the physical care from someone. He was the man of action, so he made me very happy by taking me out celebrating my first day at job, he first-aided me when I got bike accident, he listened to my silliness and gave many useful advices, he touched, held hands when I didn't intentionally ask for it.....they're just normal things in rship I can tell, but not many people can have that kinds of act in a rship you know?

    All these memories, and just one upset evening everything was gone, how can there be a person who can shadow every memories in a blink like that. I understand that he's old enough to think everything carefully, despite being an Aries men - who is famous for saying things without thinking first, and I believe he has more depth and emotions than what he's showing. That's why I get so caught up in this whole confusion cause I hope he just said it in his angry moments.

    I definitely won't reply a word to him, there's no use. Thank you, for reading and giving such a great advice. I understand I should NOT hope in any case, cause he's very clear, but somehow I keep believing in people's best behaviour. Silly me..
  • tino
    Pisces sun, Sagittarius moon, Scorpio rising
    @Gemitati Yes I know, I will leave him be. I know you mean well, and I'm very silly now and I should be tougher. 2 months are not long term, but if you're lucky enough to experience different types of love, you will see there're short-term relationships that have deeper connections. Some rships are so short, but the scars they leave behind are even wider than long-term ones. I see the closure, I see his clarity and his decency to give me a closure and I won't bother him or beg or anything. But for once, at the moment, I just hope for the best in people. No creature can be freezing cold just a day after yesterday when we were still happy and loving. I'd understand if there's progression to this breaking up, but there's none. Just in a blink, everything shattered. Like just one careless act from me, the one I love can tear up the love I gave them from the inside. I'm not going to disturb him, I just hope and sad.
  • Posted by tino
    @Gemitati Yes I know, I will leave him be. I know you mean well, and I'm very silly now and I should be tougher. 2 months are not long term, but if you're lucky enough to experience different types of love, you will see there're short-term relationships that have deeper connections. Some rships are so short, but the scars they leave behind are even wider than long-term ones. I see the closure, I see his clarity and his decency to give me a closure and I won't bother him or beg or anything. But for once, at the moment, I just hope for the best in people. No creature can be freezing cold just a day after yesterday when we were still happy and loving. I'd understand if there's progression to this breaking up, but there's none. Just in a blink, everything shattered. Like just one careless act from me, the one I love can tear up the love I gave them from the inside. I'm not going to disturb him, I just hope and sad.


    Sorry honey. I see. You are right. Even love from first sight for a day can hurt like hell when gone!
    I am just an old cookiemonster waiting for my love to ‘happen’ for 8 years! So to me your term was like...common girl!
    I apologize and hope you will heal quick and find better one ASAP! Don’t dwell on old. Best of all. ❤️
  • Pandora101
    Sun Aqua, Moon Canc, Venus Pisc, Mars Aries, Mercury Cap, Asc Scorp
    female
    Posted by tino
    @Cancer-Lady I'm crying reading your advice. Not because it's not good, but it's so good to the point every truth hurts. I will kick myself if his reply is hurtful, I sure am and I know he's fully capable of...and as my past experience with 2 Geminis, I don't want that to happen just once more time. I keep remembering all the memories we have together, in a very long time I feel the physical care from someone. He was the man of action, so he made me very happy by taking me out celebrating my first day at job, he first-aided me when I got bike accident, he listened to my silliness and gave many useful advices, he touched, held hands when I didn't intentionally ask for it.....they're just normal things in rship I can tell, but not many people can have that kinds of act in a rship you know?

    All these memories, and just one upset evening everything was gone, how can there be a person who can shadow every memories in a blink like that. I understand that he's old enough to think everything carefully, despite being an Aries men - who is famous for saying things without thinking first, and I believe he has more depth and emotions than what he's showing. That's why I get so caught up in this whole confusion cause I hope he just said it in his angry moments.

    I definitely won't reply a word to him, there's no use. Thank you, for reading and giving such a great advice. I understand I should NOT hope in any case, cause he's very clear, but somehow I keep believing in people's best behaviour. Silly me..


    tino said: " by taking me out celebrating my first day at job, he first-aided me when I got bike accident, he listened to my silliness and gave many useful advices, he touched, held hands when I didn't intentionally ask for it."
    and
    "I understand that he's old enough to think everything carefully, despite being an Aries men"

    he is old enough??! at 26?
    I am not sure your two are equals....

    please please, dont reply to his break-up text.... just dont contact him at all..... stay off facebook for a week at least...
    you dont need to apologize!! dont be a doormat
    try to speak to somebody in your real life friends and tell them not to allow you to send a text to him... just bury your phone and internet for a week at least...
    if he comes back, it must be his own decision....
  • Smidge
    ASC~cancer | SUN~aries | MOON~virgo
    Who's the girl he went out with?
  • tino
    Pisces sun, Sagittarius moon, Scorpio rising
    I will take your advice, thank you @Pandora101. As I have written in my response to AriesJo, the reason why I want to apologize is because I did force him to answer my question, to explain himself for yesterday night even though he said he didn't want me rambling. I told him if I didn't say a word, how could this problem be solved and he just went silent. Which is very Aries of him. But anyway, I see the fault in my part, and the break-up text mostly pointed out more of my fault. So after that, even after that, I still must not apologize and just be gone?

    Partly, I think there's no use apologizing if he ended us. I mean we ended, there's no point apologizing now isn't it? But another part, I'm responsible for my wrongdoing. Do you see where I got confused?
  • tino
    Pisces sun, Sagittarius moon, Scorpio rising
    @Smidge It was his friend. Normally he also went with his male friends and female friends in our time together, it was actually nothing just another friend of him. We'd been together before he went out with her, and morning the day after was also normal and great, lots of fun. I can spot emotional change, so basically I can tell there's nothing smell here. Besides, the timeline for a theatre act is 3 hours, and afterwards he went home sending me picture. He was just afraid I would get jealous. I would have known if he had bad intention, trust my intuition. His break-up text is not completely cold too, he points out the problem with decency. It was because of my forcing him to speak up I don't know, I should have stayed quiet when he told me to, but that would be what a doormat would do.
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Aries, Aries Man, Aries Woman, Aries First Decan, Aries Second Decan, Aries Third Decan, Aries Cusps

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