Do Aries joke to hide insecurities?

So I finally broke down and texted my Aries last night and I had sent him a pic of me with it. He has a thing about me dressing up as a naughty schoolgirl, so I did and took a pic cause I knew that would get his attention. I just said I was thinking about him and that I missed his smile and missed him saying I love you beautiful, cause he told me that everyday. He answered with "I love you beautiful" which made me cry. Then he asked if that was my POF profile pic?...wtf? I though that was rude but just said no, but I know he has a weird sense of humour sometimes. We had this discussion a few weeks ago and I told him I had a POF account before but it wasn't active now and he told me about this guy he knew that was always on POF and had dates all the time with different girls...turns out I was one of them 😢 This was like a year ago and I've never seen him again. He didn't really like that but it was in the past and we were sort of confessing our sins so to speak so it was all good.

Then as we talked some more last night, I had asked him how things were going and he said not "too bad I guess, how are things with u?" I said I was trying to give him his space to figure things out to which he replied "Did you meet any nice guys lol...kidding"...again wtf? I just said no and that that wasn't a nice thing to say considering the past few weeks I've been worrying about him. He said he was sorry and that he was just being a smartass...which he has done before. We didn't talk for long as it was late and he had worked out of town all week moving people. He said he loved me and hadn't forgot about me and that we'd talk soon. Just wondering if this was his way of checking up on what I've been doing without atually coming right out and saying it?... He's always said that the thought of me being with someone else drives him crazy and he doesn't like for me to ever talk about any exes. The old me would have told him off but I knew that wouldn't get me anywhere, but it did hurt, even if he was trying to make a joke of it.

here's the deal, he is mad at you and in a way disappointed, whatever you did with that guy a year ago - he knows it all and it buggs him, since he is pissed at you he throws sarcastic jokes at you to make you feel bad, its what i do for a little revenge, also at the same time those jokes have a second message, he doesnt trust you, so in that joke is a partial truth, he wanted you to tell him that you did not meet any men, that u havent slept with any men, and have been faithful to him, since that guy who u had a date with probably told your aries that youre a hoe and had sex with him on the first date and were too slutty in bed, to get back on track you have to show him the he is THE ONE AND ONLY, while giving him space.

I would see it as you Aries feeling insecure about what is going on. He is trying to probe to find out how it really is, and using "humor" to do that. He doesn't really know how to approach, or even really broach the noted subjects. Be patient and honest, and things will play themselves out. Can't say how they will play out, but it will work better for everyone if the noted honesty is maintained.

To be just a bit more pointed, you might mention to Ye Old Aries that NO! that photo is not your avatar for whatever, but for his sole "appreciation" only!

He thinks you still use your POF account.

Posted by KingOfAries
he doesnt trust you, so in that joke is a partial truth, he wanted you to tell him that you did not meet any men, that u havent slept with any men, and have been faithful to him, since that guy who u had a date with probably told your aries that youre a hoe and had sex with him on the first date and were too slutty in bed, to get back on track you have to show him the he is THE ONE AND ONLY, while giving him space.

Well as far as I know he doesn't talk to this guy anymore, only worked with him for a while and he used to brag all the time about POF. I told him I don't use that account. I'm finding it hard to show him I'm still here and only have eyes for him while still giving him his space...that's a hard line to walk. How do I do that without seeming needy but also not wanting him to forget about me while he sorts his shit out?...

"and they laugh like stupid when they've lied to you"

It's because they feel bad.....

Posted by miha
yes...they do
and they laugh like stupid when they've lied to you

.

huh?

Posted by amysue99

Posted by KingOfAries
he doesnt trust you, so in that joke is a partial truth, he wanted you to tell him that you did not meet any men, that u havent slept with any men, and have been faithful to him, since that guy who u had a date with probably told your aries that youre a hoe and had sex with him on the first date and were too slutty in bed, to get back on track you have to show him the he is THE ONE AND ONLY, while giving him space.

Well as far as I know he doesn't talk to this guy anymore, only worked with him for a while and he used to brag all the time about POF. I told him I don't use that account. I'm finding it hard to show him I'm still here and only have eyes for him while still giving him his space...that's a hard line to walk. How do I do that without seeming needy but also not wanting him to forget about me while he sorts his shit out?...

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telling him you dont use it? well i can tell you im a spaghetti monster, would you believe me? you have to understand you have a history, bad from what it looks like, that guy u were with could have exaggerated a few things, or maybe he hasn't, whatever the case is you should call your aries over, open your POF account and show him the last time u went on it that would be a solid proof that you dont go on it anymore, or just delete the account or let him see your browsing history, if i were him for example i would go on your computer and just go through your history before getting too pissed off, you have to understand, me him other aries like to feel exclusive and knowing that uve done this and that with your ex is just a major let down, so prove to him its all long gone, propose him to come over to check your browsing history, if YOU DID GO ON THAT WEBSITE then in history search POF, then delete all links that pop up, that way you history will be cleaned and he wont suspect anything, though frankly if i was told you can come over and check my history i wouldnt do it id believe the person

loll it is true

Posted by miha

Posted by KingOfAries

Posted by miha
yes...they do
and they laugh like stupid when they've lied to you

.

huh?

when he doesn't do anything wrong and i accuse him, he gets furious. if he starts laughing like a child and bubbling some explanations...then he did sth wrong and he is aware of it.

that's how it works....i ask him upfront...if he gets furious, he didn't mean any harm, it was a misunderstanding, if he starts laughing and behaving like a child...then...HE DID IT

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Oh man I accused him of lying to me once, when he wasn't I just overeacted as usual, and he didn't speak to me for 2 days!..then acted like everything was fine lol.

To elaborate on KOA's comment, did you sleep with that other guy when you dated him?

If you did, it would explain why he doesn't trust you since you still have that POF account. Girls who put out fast = not trustworthy in a guy's eyes when it comes to relationships.

Posted by Archimedes
"and they laugh like stupid when they've lied to you"

It's because they feel bad.....

VERY true... I have a terrible time lying to those I really care about. My teenage years sucked because I would always wind up telling on myself-- hahaha

Posted by rockyroadicecream
To elaborate on KOA's comment, did you sleep with that other guy when you dated him?

If you did, it would explain why he doesn't trust you since you still have that POF account. Girls who put out fast = not trustworthy in a guy's eyes when it comes to relationships.

Unfortunately, yes I did, but it was only the one time and I've never seen him since. This guys is a real sleezbag so I think that's why it bothered him so much, I figured that out pretty quick which is why I never went back! Aries had done the same thing in the past and it turns out it was one of my friends, so we were even on the one. He's just always been worried that I'll get tired of waiting for him and once he finally gets his life together and comes looking for me, I won't be there. I don't know how to prove to him I am still here and will be still here for as long as it takes. I haven't even thought of looking for another man until I see this situation through. He's always said that he doesn't care what I have done in the past and doesn't want to hear about it, all that matters is right now and the future with him. I've tried to delete my POF account but for some reason it won't let me! I'm gonna keep trying though. He wanted to see a naked pic, but I wouldn't do that...or maybe I will after a few days...who knows! To me that seems sleezy and I want him to respect me and not just think I'm all about sex...although the sex is amazing! He drives me insane! But I love him dearly and just want to make him happy 😢

Posted by amysue99

Posted by rockyroadicecream
To elaborate on KOA's comment, did you sleep with that other guy when you dated him?

If you did, it would explain why he doesn't trust you since you still have that POF account. Girls who put out fast = not trustworthy in a guy's eyes when it comes to relationships.

Aries had done the same thing in the past and it turns out it was one of my friends, so we were even on the one. But I love him dearly and just want to make him happy 😢 and send him a naked picture

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okayy so forget about being even theres no such thing, if u ever do something to get even with someone its over, i see your point but dont say its even to him.

second thing dont send him any pictures it will just prove his point that youre shallow and easy, did you send any naked pictures to that guy that screwed you? he might also post those pictures all over the internet when u piss him off so just keep the pictures to urself and tell him if he misses u he can come over, what u can do about the pof account, well, you can delete all ur pictures, delete all ur info, change email addreess on it to something else if possible, and then type a random combination on notepad something like "asdasgsfdasdfgaewgw34234f23" then copy paste it into the password field to replace the password, then delete the combination from the notepad and ull never be able to access the account ever again

Aries had done the same thing in the past and it turns out it was one of my friends, so we were even on the one. But I love him dearly and just want to make him happy 😢 and send him a naked picture



okayy so forget about being even theres no such thing, if u ever do something to get even with someone its over, i see your point but dont say its even to him.

second thing dont send him any pictures it will just prove his point that youre shallow and easy, did you send any naked pictures to that guy that screwed you? he might also post those pictures all over the internet when u piss him off so just keep the pictures to urself and tell him if he misses u he can come over, what u can do about the pof account, well, you can delete all ur pictures, delete all ur info, change email addreess on it to something else if possible, and then type a random combination on notepad something like "asdasgsfdasdfgaewgw34234f23" then copy paste it into the password field to replace the password, then delete the combination from the notepad and ull never be able to access the account ever again



First of all, I never said I wanted to make him happy by sending him a naked picture. Secondly, he told me about sleeping with this girl first, and it was way before I even met him, same goes with the guy he knows that I slept with. Neither of us did it to get even with anyone, it's just an unfortunate coincidence that we both knew the other person and it just happened to come out while we were talking about a lot of butter. He wanted to tell me for a while but thought I'd be mad and he wasn't upset about my mistake either, at least he didn't seem to be at the time. We both kinda had a laugh about it actually and joked about confessing our sins to each other. Maybe while he's trying to figure stuff out on his end that he's trying to figure out if I'm gonna stick around or sleep around, I dunno. I don't do that sort of thing, that was the first and last time in my life I had ever done anything like that and felt really awful after, which i told him. I now understand the term "walk of shame". One night stands are not my thing! Never again! And no, I didn't send the other guy any pictures, this is the first time I've ever done that sort of thing. I just feel like he's judging me for something that I did a year ago before I met him that had absolutely nothing to do with him, which isn't fair considering the circumstances we're now in.