Cancers! what does it mean when you dont want to

be close intimately my cancer lately has put up this awkward guard like he doesn't want me to touch him lmfao,,, or is he shy? eh!?!

greatttttt *sarcasm*

You're (s)mothering him too much.... or not enough !

ILL go with smothering heheheh...anyways we talked turns out he doesnt feel financially stable and for some reason that afects his relationships?? is this another cancer thing i dont understand wahhh i love how complicated and interesting you guys are >.< *seriously*

Posted by EmilySalasTeddy

...anyways we talked turns out he doesnt feel financially stable and for some reason that afects his relationships?? is this another cancer thing i dont understand wahhh i love how complicated and interesting you guys are *seriously*

Not it's not a Cancer thing, it's a guy thing.

Posted by KittyKnitter
it's a guy thing and a cancer thing. money is security, he is probably depressed also and if not depressed then at least worried about it. Since guys' self-esteem is often tied to how much money they make and their ability to keep themselves going and also spend money on their mates, this is a problem he has to work out for himself. he is pre=occupied or withdrawn about this and you can help by acting like nothing is wrong. because it is just a temporary situation.

because he is upset, he is likely feeling vulnerable, he might is closing himself off physically for distance for protection or just not feeling good about himself. this is common for cancer. his life is not in balance. and it's temporary. your ego is healthy. you continue to do what you usually do. that will help him realize that you are ok with him finding his way out of this and he will relax. just be with him. don't expect him to engage in chats about it, but it's very positive that he can already talk about it. just let him work it out on his own. if he has mood swings don't take it personally but also don't allow him to be disrespectful.

and when he works it out and things change for the better, you will be closer than ever.

^^+100

My situation with my cancer is different but... he comes to me for some of his big problems. It feels really nice that he trust me enough to feel like he can confide in me confidently and yes I have experienced his moodiness and withdrawn days but he's never disappeared on me (ie. not contacting for days or weeks)... in fact quite the contrary.

I agree with enfant too either you're smothering him too much or not enough. It's tricky with crabs it has to be the right amount of both.

I am no crab expert but I feel like my crab feels like he can confide in me because he knows if he plays the reverse psychology on me it won't work. Like pushing expecting me to pull. Shiit he pushes and I GO AWAY, I go away and I don't give a fuck... lol. No I won't take it personally and I am happy to be with or without him. So it's taught him to ask for me when he needs me. Makes things easier 🙂.

But when I love him I can really smother the guy with hugs, kisses, and attention. He loves it 🙂

If you guys have been spending a lot of time together I suggest giving him space (ie, seeing and communicating everyday). And if you're really brave push your way in his shell (like me)... but that has to be done with finesse... firm but gentle. Honestly it takes a lot of intuition with crabs. You have to know when hes being a brat and throwing a fit or when he genuinely needs you and can't admit it. For that you have to really know your man.

Good luck!

Also, from what you said it seems like he needs his space. So I'd give it to him. Let him figure things out on his own and then let him come to you. So in the mean time don't take it personally and distract yourself. When he comes back make sure its warm, inviting, loving, and understanding 🙂

Posted by enfant_terrible

Posted by EmilySalasTeddy

...anyways we talked turns out he doesnt feel financially stable and for some reason that afects his relationships?? is this another cancer thing i dont understand wahhh i love how complicated and interesting you guys are *seriously*

Not it's not a Cancer thing, it's a guy thing.

click to expand

After being on this board for quite some time, your profile pic is still distracting. hahaha

Thankyou guys and I do think I am smothering him maybe he seems distracted lately texting me less but always text me back right away when I text him him he has mentioned he is not financially stable right now taste to some medical bills and is also not satisfied with his job any longer and what's a hire paying job because he wants to provide for a family in the future I am going to give him his space to figure it all out I admire that he is thinking about his future although I do feel forgotten but he has told me he wishes I would stop overthinking and has said " I will never stop caring about you ever" , you have been a part of my life too damn long" sigh I just miss him but I will do my own thing

If my bank roll is limp so is my meat. My libido is directly linked to my wallet.

thanks you guys i have given him space and has come back i think im going to be giving him alot of space more often it is good for both of us!! i enjoy it aswell i forgot how much i enjoy being independent 🙂