Do you like to make people suffer?

I feel like this crab is trying to hurt me...on purpose. But, I'm not sure why. This past weekend, I had a big event that he said he'd go to. Never showed up. The next day, he said "Sorry I couldn't make it. I had an issue that blew all my plans". I to
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  • @tnmnt, I appreciate your explanations here. These are what I’ve always hoped to be informed & learnt from here, particularly from the person with the placements themselves, to understand the thought mechanism & intention. From what you’ve posted here, I’ve learnt yet something else, what you said about Cancer’s tendency of testing sensitivity. It’s very enlightening. I can see how the Cancer I’m concerned with does this too. It justifies his intention & inconsistent behaviours better. Inconsistent in society’s standard but I can see how you would think you weren’t at all odd.
  • Posted by tnmnt
    Posted by TaurusFlower22
    Posted by tnmnt
    Posted by TaurusFlower22
    Posted by tnmnt
    Posted by TaurusFlower22
    Posted by tnmnt
    Posted by TaurusFlower22
    Posted by tnmnt
    The concept is there but the words you used don’t match our way of thinking. I personally don’t do it to hurt others, but to give eye for an eye to someone who hurt me or neglected me.
    Sometimes I do it in such a fake way that even I wonder why. If you get over it, fine. Time heals. If we both pretend it didn't happen and move on, better. If you get annoying and start crying, I'm gone.


    "I personally don’t do it to hurt others, but to give eye for an eye to someone who hurt me or neglected me."

    You don't see how your words are contradictory?


    I can see it, however in my head the intention is not to hurt, but to pay them with the same coin. In my experience, many people didn't even notice so we could all move on with our lives.


    LOL


    I don't understand what's funny. I’m trying to be completely open for users to understand the Cancer mechanism in this situation.

    When I get hurt or annoyed overly matters that are relatively minor, I tell myself it’s nothing, that I shouldn’t be hurt/annoyed in the first place. So, nothing happens and the person and I are still apparently fine. If they realise it or better if they ask me if that exact episode annoyed me, I’ll let it out and kind of make amend. If not, at the first chance to spite that person, I’ll do it.

    Still something “minor”. Seeing their reactions demonstrates me that I am the one overly sensitive.
    The initial intention is therefore not to hurt, but to experiment other’s sensitivity compared to mine in a similar situation.

    p.s. This might be also a Cap moon reaction, but my Cancer/Aqua cousin acts the same.


    I'm sorry if my "lol" hurt you.


    Lol, I'm sorry that you had to write a post about a Cancer hurting you for not showing up, and for trying to make you understand my point of view. I thought that was the purpose of this thread. Good luck!


    I was being sincere. But, see? That's exactly my point. You guys do petty things like that to try and hurt people.

    And yes, I sure did. But no need to be sorry. I'm good. Clearly I've stepped on your gooey crab meat. My bad.

    Maybe stop taking everything to heart. I'm just a stranger on the internet. Relax.


    Look, regardless of astrology it's not nice to lol or dismiss someone who tried to explain you something (whether you agree with it or not). Twice.

    You are the one who is getting judgemental. One thing is posting this thread to get to understand this behaviour, a different thing is to make it to shame the sign and to tell off any Cancer who answers.

    I explained you the mechanics of this behaviour, as you asked. Whether a cancer does it or not depends on experience, social skills and age.

    Stop spreading superstition. Peace
    click to expand


    ::sigh::

    I give up.

  • Posted by tnmnt
    Posted by TaurusFlower22
    Posted by tnmnt
    Posted by TaurusFlower22
    Posted by tnmnt
    Posted by TaurusFlower22
    Posted by tnmnt
    The concept is there but the words you used don’t match our way of thinking. I personally don’t do it to hurt others, but to give eye for an eye to someone who hurt me or neglected me.
    Sometimes I do it in such a fake way that even I wonder why. If you get over it, fine. Time heals. If we both pretend it didn't happen and move on, better. If you get annoying and start crying, I'm gone.


    "I personally don’t do it to hurt others, but to give eye for an eye to someone who hurt me or neglected me."

    You don't see how your words are contradictory?


    I can see it, however in my head the intention is not to hurt, but to pay them with the same coin. In my experience, many people didn't even notice so we could all move on with our lives.


    LOL


    I don't understand what's funny. I’m trying to be completely open for users to understand the Cancer mechanism in this situation.

    When I get hurt or annoyed overly matters that are relatively minor, I tell myself it’s nothing, that I shouldn’t be hurt/annoyed in the first place. So, nothing happens and the person and I are still apparently fine. If they realise it or better if they ask me if that exact episode annoyed me, I’ll let it out and kind of make amend. If not, at the first chance to spite that person, I’ll do it.

    Still something “minor”. Seeing their reactions demonstrates me that I am the one overly sensitive.
    The initial intention is therefore not to hurt, but to experiment other’s sensitivity compared to mine in a similar situation.

    p.s. This might be also a Cap moon reaction, but my Cancer/Aqua cousin acts the same.


    I'm sorry if my "lol" hurt you.


    Lol, I'm sorry that you had to write a post about a Cancer hurting you for not showing up, and for trying to make you understand my point of view. I thought that was the purpose of this thread. Good luck!
    click to expand


    I was being sincere. But, see? That's exactly my point. You guys do petty things like that to try and hurt people.

    And yes, I sure did. But no need to be sorry. I'm good. Clearly I've stepped on your gooey crab meat. My bad.

    Maybe stop taking everything to heart. I'm just a stranger on the internet. Relax.
  • Posted by tnmnt
    Posted by TaurusFlower22
    Posted by tnmnt
    Posted by TaurusFlower22
    Posted by tnmnt
    The concept is there but the words you used don’t match our way of thinking. I personally don’t do it to hurt others, but to give eye for an eye to someone who hurt me or neglected me.
    Sometimes I do it in such a fake way that even I wonder why. If you get over it, fine. Time heals. If we both pretend it didn't happen and move on, better. If you get annoying and start crying, I'm gone.


    "I personally don’t do it to hurt others, but to give eye for an eye to someone who hurt me or neglected me."

    You don't see how your words are contradictory?


    I can see it, however in my head the intention is not to hurt, but to pay them with the same coin. In my experience, many people didn't even notice so we could all move on with our lives.


    LOL


    I don't understand what's funny. I’m trying to be completely open for users to understand the Cancer mechanism in this situation.

    When I get hurt or annoyed overly matters that are relatively minor, I tell myself it’s nothing, that I shouldn’t be hurt/annoyed in the first place. So, nothing happens and the person and I are still apparently fine. If they realise it or better if they ask me if that exact episode annoyed me, I’ll let it out and kind of make amend. If not, at the first chance to spite that person, I’ll do it.

    Still something “minor”. Seeing their reactions demonstrates me that I am the one overly sensitive.
    The initial intention is therefore not to hurt, but to experiment other’s sensitivity compared to mine in a similar situation.

    p.s. This might be also a Cap moon reaction, but my Cancer/Aqua cousin acts the same.
    click to expand


    I'm sorry if my "lol" hurt you.
  • themilkyway36
    🌅♏️ ☀️♑️ 🌙♏️ 💕♓️
    Posted by TaurusFlower22
    Posted by themilkyway36
    He's probably trying to get you back for something

    Cancers can be petty at their worst and hold on to grudges/the little things


    Hell yeah. I have 2 Cancers in my life who are currently holding lifetime grudges against me.

    I can't understand that level of petty. So I just have to laugh.

    click to expand


    I'm dealing with a potential similar issue. Sometimes when you think you've talked it out with them and everything's fine again between you, they still go ahead and act like they're trying to get back at you in small petty ways and won't tell you what is really up...

  • Posted by CaramelizedCoffee
    you haven't been single in 10 years

    that's crazy



    I know. I agree!

    And when I was single prior to that, it wasn't for long (maybe a few weeks). I prefer to be with someone.
  • NelsonSacramento
    Sun ♏ Moon ♓ AC ♋ | Pluto ♏ Saturn ♏ Merc ♏ Mars ♑
    33 years old male
    Posted by SpaceBird
    Cancer men can be chicken butter. Cancer women ...only if you hurt us.

    👀
  • Posted by themilkyway36
    He's probably trying to get you back for something

    Cancers can be petty at their worst and hold on to grudges/the little things


    Hell yeah. I have 2 Cancers in my life who are currently holding lifetime grudges against me.

    I can't understand that level of petty. So I just have to laugh.

  • themilkyway36
    🌅♏️ ☀️♑️ 🌙♏️ 💕♓️
    He's probably trying to get you back for something

    Cancers can be petty at their worst and hold on to grudges/the little things
  • Laughing because it seems like no matter which Cancer I talk to, you ALL seem to talk in riddles.
    It's kinda like talking to the same person in different bodies. Makes me feel like I'm in the twilight zone. 😂😂😂😂
  • Posted by tnmnt
    Posted by TaurusFlower22
    Posted by tnmnt
    The concept is there but the words you used don’t match our way of thinking. I personally don’t do it to hurt others, but to give eye for an eye to someone who hurt me or neglected me.
    Sometimes I do it in such a fake way that even I wonder why. If you get over it, fine. Time heals. If we both pretend it didn't happen and move on, better. If you get annoying and start crying, I'm gone.


    "I personally don’t do it to hurt others, but to give eye for an eye to someone who hurt me or neglected me."

    You don't see how your words are contradictory?


    I can see it, however in my head the intention is not to hurt, but to pay them with the same coin. In my experience, many people didn't even notice so we could all move on with our lives.
    click to expand


    LOL
  • Posted by tnmnt
    The concept is there but the words you used don’t match our way of thinking. I personally don’t do it to hurt others, but to give eye for an eye to someone who hurt me or neglected me.
    Sometimes I do it in such a fake way that even I wonder why. If you get over it, fine. Time heals. If we both pretend it didn't happen and move on, better. If you get annoying and start crying, I'm gone.


    "I personally don’t do it to hurt others, but to give eye for an eye to someone who hurt me or neglected me."

    You don't see how your words are contradictory?
  • Posted by taupixie
    Your situation is eeriely similar to me, also a Taurus woman dealing with a Cancer man. Eeriely not because I’m surprised, but because it is sad how predictably it turns out between you 2 just the way it is with me & him, also very empathetically knowing you wish so much for it not to turn any more worse, already trying your best to respond in the best way you could.

    It only seems no matter how you take it, don’t ever assume you will have the upper hand.

    You try to give in to him & be nice, it will only breed a spoilt man & he will trample all over you.

    You decide to be cold & unyielding towards him, he will think that you are not really into this/him after all & will withhold himself or plays it half heartedly too.

    But I always feel that Cancer people are really softies,but sometimes they can’t help hurting others in order to securely protect themselves. Imagine the crab, its soft flesh underneath its hard shell & its pinching claws meant to keep harm at bay.

    But sorry I don’t have the right answer for you. You decide what is worth for yourself.


    Thank you. At this point, I've decided to just learn from this. He used me. Period. He told me all the time how much he likes me, how deeply he cared about me, that my heart was safe with him...all of that was just talk. His actions have shown me the truth.
    I have not contacted him, and will not be contacting him again.
    I've also decided to just take a break from men right now. There are a few who know I'm completely single now, and would like to go on dates or whatever, but I'm so turned off by men because of this one man. Lol
    I think I'll just enjoy being by myself for a while. It's been over 10 years since I have been completely alone. I need some alone time.
    I wish you the best with your situation!
  • Your situation is eeriely similar to me, also a Taurus woman dealing with a Cancer man. Eeriely not because I’m surprised, but because it is sad how predictably it turns out between you 2 just the way it is with me & him, also very empathetically knowing you wish so much for it not to turn any more worse, already trying your best to respond in the best way you could.

    It only seems no matter how you take it, don’t ever assume you will have the upper hand.

    You try to give in to him & be nice, it will only breed a spoilt man & he will trample all over you.

    You decide to be cold & unyielding towards him, he will think that you are not really into this/him after all & will withhold himself or plays it half heartedly too.

    But I always feel that Cancer people are really softies,but sometimes they can’t help hurting others in order to securely protect themselves. Imagine the crab, its soft flesh underneath its hard shell & its pinching claws meant to keep harm at bay.

    But sorry I don’t have the right answer for you. You decide what is worth for yourself.
  • Posted by OneKnight
    Posted by CaramelizedCoffee

    @oneknight as a guy who has had marriage and kids
    How do you see yourself now???


    Confused.

    click to expand


    I feel ya.

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