how sad... crabs do hold a grudge for long time...

Not while ago I've posted here... that my crab ex-best friend were going to probably bump into each other on halloween party due to a mutual friend (after months of not talking to each other)... destiny keep holding us apart... I've ended up not making the halloween party (I got super distracted... met a cute guy... so I prioritize on my female parts that night) so no meet up...

although tonight I was invited to scorpio friend's bday dinner which I've kind of anticipated she was going to come, because I met this girl throught her...

Must say how sad... we avoided each other.... she didn't say hi, I didn't either... the whole night went by, and basically we both pretended (or I least I did) we weren't there... the saddest part... everybody noticed it... not even crossed a look.. (how pathetic, from being attached to the hip to be enemies not even able to even have "fake" interaction 😭 )

I've tried to keep it nice... but deep inside I felt bad and sad... this is what we became into... not see each other in the eye, not acknowledge each other presence in the room after 2 years...

how sad... 😢

I tried to make things less awkward almost at the end when she was about to leave, I said "hey!!!! hello? and I guess bye?" she touched my shoulder and left... it felt like we both wanted to make it right, but at the same time we didn't know how to...

the whole interaction broke my heart... i miss her and I didn't know how to make it better and not awkward ..

worst part ....after she left people asked me... "why are u still not talking to each other—?"... I've avoided the topic... is no one business... 😭

FWP : I will not give you any advise. You care a lot aboht her and if this is your way so be it. If shes an ass thats her problem!

Thanks Starry I know there not much advice to be given in this case... i do care too much about her, deep down I wish we could be back to be friends... and not going to lie after almost 6 months of not knowing much about her, I got a little hope that this brief interactions could lead to a civil approach to not be THAT estranged anymore...

I don't know her, but for me it break my heart that someone I was too close to, cannot even acknowledge me... ROFL like an Adele song, hahahhaha Hello from the other side of the table, with 6 feet and 10 people in between us...

I miss the idea of who she was a lot... but i believe that person doesn't exist anymore... is so sad, that we cannot exchange even small talk... like how you been, whats new and shit like that... but to be honest i take my part responsibility for last night too... it takes two to tango, and I should've done something to break the ice a little...

Posted by Vixen2
When I'm in an argument or diagreement I don't hold grudges long. I'm usually over it pretty quickly sometimes within an hour...it just depends. But I think water signs in general hold very long grudges because the amount of emotion, time, energy placed in a trusted friendship...and when someone hurts someone badly enough they just amputated by Scorpio, swam away from Pisces, and the shell gets put on permanently by Cancer...and it's just done. Over. No second thoughts.

Vixen i guess you hit the nail in the head with " water signs in general hold very long grudges because the amount of emotion, time, energy placed in a trusted friendship...

I know as a water sign that when I still feel strong emotions for someone who has hurt me... I cannot fake it... and I've believe if those where not still in there probably we wont have this kind of childish interactions... although maybe because I'm Pisces... i don't shut the door to someone at the first offence or after the person in question has been trying to make amends and all that... but some cancer simply not that "forgiving"

sigh...

If it helps you make peace or makes your angrier at your lost friendship I can offer to you how I deal with it from a Cancerian point of view.

If there is a minor disagreement i will usually come to terms with it, but if there is something that I consider "betrayal" or something that contradicts my values or beliefs to the core then that is pretty much the end.

I'm not going to fight.... cancer knows cancer reactions... 😭

to rabidtalker: I could completely understand your point the confusing part is to the day I don't know where she stands... I didn't betrayed her... i feel super bad... because cannot understand how things came down to this low level... yeah mistakes were done, we both hurt each other, pretty badly, we both acknowledge that... I did apologized, and try to work things out... but she didn't let me... i give her time and space... (which was also good for me) and while I guess she made the decision for both of us that we are not going to be back to be friends.... My point is always been I guess there is something more that she refuse to tell me because otherwise I dont understand things as they are right now... not reasons to end a friendship, or even less to act like to teenagers in high school... How am I supposed to know what apparently I did wrong if Im not being told why am I being punished for life.

To finbuff: yeah you did warned me... I ended up not going anyways... I dont want to opening any wounds, I dont want to discuss anything from the past anymore (no point to it), I've said what I've needed to say... she said nothing... I don't get the part of not being civilized in occasions that cannot avoid bumping into each other... we share friends, we love them, they love us, non of us have been talking shit about each other to other people... I'm not a wound...

I dont know... I know is the same old record... all i know is i miss her in my life... I'm not used to people swiping thing under the carpet, and pretend like a chunk of your life never happened, even less I dont understand arrogant attitude...

FWP -do not expect empathy from someone who has yet ti grow up! Why are you beating yourself up about not being able to break the ive, she did not make any effort either. Let her sulk and continue living her life homding grudges, you do whatever is in your power to make things right jusr dont expect anything in return!

Posted by Starry22
FWP -do not expect empathy from someone who has yet ti grow up! Why are you beating yourself up about not being able to break the ive, she did not make any effort either. Let her sulk and continue living her life homding grudges, you do whatever is in your power to make things right jusr dont expect anything in return!

Wow this totally makes sense...

I usually don't hold grudges either

Well this is all weird is been a week since the incident and 3 days ago I got a text message from her saying "miss our friendship sometimes, sorry u felt awkward" (referring to the dinner the other night.... I was like blank stare...

I don't understand the message ( I mean i do, but is not like i miss us lets meet or so)... obviously she was meant to say she miss us... the "sometimes" to me sounded kind of, like she wanted to sound like is not affecting her in mayor way... and the rest is like she noticed it was awkward our interaction... but is not like miles and miles are separating us... missing each other has an easy fix for me... but then is when I guess she is stubborn, she might miss me but she refused to move an inch from her position....

I've never meet someone so contradicting...

Yeah, as painful as it sounds is true.

she moved on from our friendship because she didn't really cared as she said she did.... reason why all this long all i got is a stupid text message out of the blue that it only left the scar open... I call that cruelty... if you are no longer interested just don't say anything...