Cappy asking for favors all of a sudden..

I've posted before about a cap man I met a few months ago..to briefly recap I think he was trying to test me to see if I'd sleep with him right way (which I didn't). So then the sex talk stopped then he mentioned that maybe he shouldn't talk to me on a romantic level because he thought I'd be good for his business and didn't want the bond we already had to be messed up if we didn't work out. I told him that while I was flattered he thought I was smart enough to do business with him, I am not interested in being a colleague but a girlfriend (not in those words, but you get the gist) So we got thru that..now we have this..he strikes me as someone who is smart enough to do things for himself and to figure stuff out on his own. Which is why I found it odd that he asked me to do a few little favors for him today that he EASILY could have done on his own. LOL Of course I don't mind helping him as long as it's within reason, because I consider him a friend. At some points though I felt like I was auditioning to be his personal assistant lol. I guess I'm trying to figure out why he needs my "help" all of a sudden, I want him to know that I will help him and be there for him..but I'm also afraid that me helping him out too much may make me look like a push over or that I'll just jump at his will.. Am I right to be a little cautious?

Tell him to drop dead.

Posted by ScorpioFish
Tell him to drop dead.

Agree

PM

Hmm, but I'm rather fond of the guy..so nah.. 🙂

They don't call them users of the zodiac, dear.

But given your response, in typical Leo female fashion, you're just going to continue until it becomes trainwreck status.

...sooo whatever.

users of the zodiac for nothing*

If read right shes not a leo but a Taurus and this has not so much to do with using believe it or not.

You(Mintsprinkles) have boundaries. Some Caps are not use to women not bending believe it or not...arrogant, yes. He cant get you to wrap around his finger sexually, so he's going to see what he CAN get you to do. It seems like using, but this is for his ego. You cant tell him "no" or to "wait" and think he's not going to try to win some area since he is loosing in others.

Just my opinion. My Cap friend gets like this with me occasionally. I just tell him "no" to everything...problem solved...well somewhat. He still push from time to time.

This will eventually become a headache for you. You are dealing with 90% ego now.

Posted by lnana04
If read right shes not a leo but a Taurus and this has not so much to do with using believe it or not.

You(Mintsprinkles) have boundaries. Some Caps are not use to women not bending believe it or not...arrogant, yes. He cant get you to wrap around his finger sexually, so he's going to see what he CAN get you to do. It seems like using, but this is for his ego. You cant tell him "no" or to "wait" and think he's not going to try to win some area since he is loosing in others.

Just my opinion. My Cap friend gets like this with me occasionally. I just tell him "no" to everything...problem solved...well somewhat. He still push from time to time.

This will eventually become a headache for you. You are dealing with 90% ego now.

You would be correct I am a Taurus. Well I will mention that he HAS done little favors for me before, so maybe this is his way of me paying him back..meh whatever and like you said I do have boundaries, for now the little favors he asked for are little easy ones that only took like maybe 10 or 15 mins to do so not a huge chunk of my life is missing because of it. If it's gets to a point that it's annoying I'll tell him to either hire a PA or pay me 🙂

And I'm fully aware that he's used to getting his way, we've talked about it a few times.

Another thing...what's with all of the Capricorn hate around here? Are they that bad?

Establish your boundaries. You allow it, he will keep doing it. It will eventually get where you resent it. As long as he is doing things for you, then he's not using you. Just don't be the only one doing the favors.

Tease him about charging him so much for each favor and he'll get the hint.

And no we're not that bad, we're wonderful!!!! Lol!!

With the hate, I think the problem is that a lot of people don't take the time to get to know us and they don't give us time to get to know them. We are one of the most loyal signs there is, as long as you're worthy of that loyalty. Takes time to establish. And, yes, there are some bad caps, like every sign has, who will use you up and are too controlling.

I was hoping to get some feed back from actual Cappys so thank you lol.

One of the first favors he asked me was if I could put 10 bucks on his son lunch card, because he was still waiting on the pin for his debit card. When I went to the website it said the minimum was 30 bucks, he said he forgot the minimum (which I don't really buy) but I said I'd do it as long as he doesn't mind paying me back that much money. He said of course not, so I did it. I know he'll pay me back so not worried about that..another one was he wanted me to bargain shop for him an iPAD, because he said he needed one..again not a biggie, all I had to do was look up some craigslist ads and send him the links. The were was one more after that, but not a big deal. The first favor kind of threw me off, because I'm sure he could have asked his kids mom to do it..why me? $ 30 bucks is nothing to me and I know he'll pay me back ..it was just an odd request..well it was to me.

Part of me did think he was testing me to see if I'd help him out in a time of need type thing..I don't know..but like I said maybe it's my Virgo moon, but in the back of my mind I'm thinking "I hope this guy isn't asking me to do stuff for him because I like him" He did offer to get my hair done a couple of times..but I left it alone, because I wouldn't want to feel like I "owe" him. But he keeps saying WE need to get your hair done look into it...I did tell him I'd pay him back..but he didn't respond.

I guess I'll just go the with flow and see where it goes.

Posted by MellyMel909
He owes you money, yet is shopping for an iPad?

It's only like 30 bucks lol he has the money, he just doesn't have his debit cards and pin codes yet. He's not lying about that cuz I know he lost his debit card a while back he told me. Like I said, I think it was bullshit just to see if I'd do it..

Shoot, girl. Let him get your hair done. He owes YOU now, you won't be owing him.

If you're good at finding bargains (virgo moon is) then I don't blame him for asking you. However, next time, tell him to sit down, you'll show him where to go on-line to find them. See, then you're doing it together.... sitting close..... touching knees....yeah, uh huh, that would work....

😈

Posted by truecap
Shoot, girl. Let him get your hair done. He owes YOU now, you won't be owing him.

If you're good at finding bargains (virgo moon is) then I don't blame him for asking you. However, next time, tell him to sit down, you'll show him where to go on-line to find them. See, then you're doing it together.... sitting close..... touching knees....yeah, uh huh, that would work....

😈

Thanks! It's funny you say Virgo moons are good @ finding bargains..he's a Virgo moon as well lol so yea I'm really starting to think it was a ploy to see if I'd help him out lol I'm kidding of course..(ok maybe I'm a little serious) 🙂

Har, misread the blurb and read the rising.

Eh, still stand by what I said. The response you gave was pretty stupid considering the examples that you gave. You're already seeing something to watch out for in this individual, but because he makes you vagina tingle, you just want to keep him around.

Unless you don't keep him in check, it's gonna be trainwreck status. Why would you want to keep around a manipulative user who just sees you as a plaything for his wants and needs?

Also, how can you take the Caps' advice seriously if they admit that they have huge egos in the same breath that they say that they're so great?

It makes one believe that the statement is just a false or an exaggerated statement. :p

lol @ "testing." I only see this bullshit term thrown around the Cap forum. I'm sorry, but why would anyone want to be an experiment to someone else because they're secretly paranoid schizos?

Generally, I'm cool with these guys. I get along with them fine. In the romance/sex dept. all this shit you speak of is just stuff to watch out for, tbh. These air heads can justify the crazy all they want, but the reality is that you just need to pay attention. ..and stand your ground. I dunno about you, but all this stupid ass bs on their part- the pushing and manipulating to get their way for the sake of their "ego" gets old real fast. Nobody needs to deal with a little boy who pushes boundaries with women like he would his mother when he was 5. Ain't nobody got time for that.

I really don't think he was using her. He did offer to do something for her in return for her help but she refused.

rockyroadieicecream is right. Remembering right now 3 Cap women I knew, all of them used to do this "test boundaries" thing.
Poor Taurus people on the hands of this type of users, because I feel a lot of pleasure in providing for others. But what do we get back?
That is the reason Caps like Cancers, because they are passive males.
Hard working all day and just signing a deal where it says "Yeah baby I will give you all that I have, and if you don't want me anymore, you can take half with you"—? NEVER!!!!!!!!!!

Posted by FeelingShred
rockyroadieicecream is right. Remembering right now 3 Cap women I knew, all of them used to do this "test boundaries" thing.
Poor Taurus people on the hands of this type of users, because I feel a lot of pleasure in providing for others. But what do we get back?
That is the reason Caps like Cancers, because they are passive males.
Hard working all day and just signing a deal where it says "Yeah baby I will give you all that I have, and if you don't want me anymore, you can take half with you"—? NEVER!!!!!!!!!!

Caps do give back. Unfortunately, you must not have passed the worthiness factor. Caps are the most loyal friend you could ever have. Capricorns don't extend the benefits of our friendship with just anyone. A cap will hold out for only special people who actually deserve it. If someone is willing to take the time to get to know us and for us to get to know them, then you find out different. If someone is trustworthy and has integrity, then a cap can be the warmest, truest friend you will find.

I'm wondering if you appeared superficial in your pursuit of this cap co-worker and she saw through that. The way you presented yourself on here, you seemed as if you were only after a sexual relationship with her. Caps are very perceptive with people and I have a feeling she didn't think you were sincere with wanting to get to know her for who she is and thought you were only after one thing, Insincerity is a big turn off for a cap woman. We are all about friendship first. It just seemed to me like you were pushing for too much too soon.

I don't mean to be harsh, but we did tell you to slow down. But, you pressured her to the point where she began to doubt your motives, which could have made her uncomfortable which equates to the point where she had to ignore you.

Just don't be bitter against caps. Take your time with next one and you might see a different result.

Oh, and cap women DO NOT like passive people. I believe this point was re-iterated by a few of the cap women on your posts.