SagiSun, AquaRising, LeoMoon, LibraMars+Venus
@SunMoonStars
11 Years1,000+ Posts
Comments: 1 · Posts: 1685 · Topics: 200
Communication problems with Cap male
Congrats on your promotion!
Tell him your expectations about communication in a soft non-attacking way and tell him how that made u feel. He needs to learn about ur needs first and vice verca
If his ego got cracks because of your promotion than its his problem, he should man up and just say sorry and be a better boyfriend.
Congrats on that promotion 🙂
If his ego got cracks because of your promotion than its his problem, he should man up and just say sorry and be a better boyfriend.
Congrats on that promotion 🙂
Congrats on your promotion! 🎉🎉🎉🎉
How are you feeling about him now? Did you talk to him after about what you were expecting from him like he could be more sympathetic and cheer u up
How are you feeling about him now? Did you talk to him after about what you were expecting from him like he could be more sympathetic and cheer u up
Congrats on the promotion!! Awesome!
Although I get the whole grrrr part of where you're coming from re: emotional support.
I have to disagree somewhat with a couple of posters.
Firstly, yes you should have said in every word - "I need emotional support"and secondly in no way shape or form are people ever mind readers...
Men in particular are wired with a completely different info input-output and their emotional intelligence is completely different to ours and I think the fact he was so honest with you about breaking down to you his reasoning and response is in fact fantastic and gives you a clue about his communication style.
So yes, I think you should spell it out to him. I need emotional support from you right now regarding this situation.
If he can't give it to you hit up a close gal pal who's been in a similar professional situation and get the feedback you want from her- someone more likely to have an instinct for this... Seek many avenues of support. Don't rely on him for your inner strengths...
I was with a Cap for quite a few years and if I've learned anything from the experience it was that he needed my emotional quota spelt out in letters about two storeys high with runway lights and gerbils in formation crouching.
Just how they are, doesn't mean they don't give a sh*t ~shrug~
Although I get the whole grrrr part of where you're coming from re: emotional support.
I have to disagree somewhat with a couple of posters.
Firstly, yes you should have said in every word - "I need emotional support"and secondly in no way shape or form are people ever mind readers...
Men in particular are wired with a completely different info input-output and their emotional intelligence is completely different to ours and I think the fact he was so honest with you about breaking down to you his reasoning and response is in fact fantastic and gives you a clue about his communication style.
So yes, I think you should spell it out to him. I need emotional support from you right now regarding this situation.
If he can't give it to you hit up a close gal pal who's been in a similar professional situation and get the feedback you want from her- someone more likely to have an instinct for this... Seek many avenues of support. Don't rely on him for your inner strengths...
I was with a Cap for quite a few years and if I've learned anything from the experience it was that he needed my emotional quota spelt out in letters about two storeys high with runway lights and gerbils in formation crouching.
Just how they are, doesn't mean they don't give a sh*t ~shrug~
He thinks you're just being a drama queen over a job you're most likely not going to stick with, and like everyone else you'll just have to deal with it. It will pass.
Not defending him but that's what he's probably thinking, and didn't know what to say because that's how he dealt with it when it happened to him at his job.
Anyhow, congrats on the promotion. Kick ass!
Not defending him but that's what he's probably thinking, and didn't know what to say because that's how he dealt with it when it happened to him at his job.
Anyhow, congrats on the promotion. Kick ass!
Posted by DonnaElvira77Thank you for the reply! Yes he got very defensive. He isn't one to talk about feelings a lot unless he is drunk/buzzed in which case it all comes out.
And I really mean Feel in the gaps not fill in the gaps..feel
This is the guy who seems like a cold distant star, but then turns into the sweetest guy who will hug me and say "i love you" when wants me to stop snoring 🙂
Posted by truecapThank you! 🙂
Congrats on your promotion!
Posted by AquaNextDoorThank you! 🙂 yeah..i got to learn how to do that "soft non attacking way". He got very upset that I called him out and in hindsight my Saggy bluntness was bad. Embarrassed to say i said maybe i need more emotional support than he can provide. Yikes smh at myself.
Tell him your expectations about communication in a soft non-attacking way and tell him how that made u feel. He needs to learn about ur needs first and vice verca
If his ego got cracks because of your promotion than its his problem, he should man up and just say sorry and be a better boyfriend.
Congrats on that promotion 🙂
Posted by SamCancerGirlThank you! 🙂
Congrats on your promotion! 🎉🎉🎉🎉
How are you feeling about him now? Did you talk to him after about what you were expecting from him like he could be more sympathetic and cheer u up
Yes, i am spending the weekend with him and we are trying to find a happy medium, i think...
Posted by FyzaGemsThank you! 🙂
"Men"
Smh
Congrats on your promotion anyways! If u have difficulities on getting some emotional support from your man, try talking to yourself. I do that most of the time.
Oh well, we need expert advice most of the times.
😄
Maybe I will try that sometime.
Wagtail, Gobshite and Greentea, thank you for your messages!
Yes, sometimes I don't like having a leo moon for this reason. So dramatic especially if I am close to the person 😢
I still want to do a kick ass job and negotiate a great title/pay though even if this is less than six months. You just never know in today's world.
Yes, he is very genuinely baffled by what I wanted him to respond with. He just isn't wired that way. I asked if his exes had similar statements about him being cold and he said yes. Talking in person is definitely better, we are spending the weekend together. He really doesn't like that part of the "drama" is one of the boss guys making sexually questionable comments at me.
Yes, sometimes I don't like having a leo moon for this reason. So dramatic especially if I am close to the person 😢
I still want to do a kick ass job and negotiate a great title/pay though even if this is less than six months. You just never know in today's world.
Yes, he is very genuinely baffled by what I wanted him to respond with. He just isn't wired that way. I asked if his exes had similar statements about him being cold and he said yes. Talking in person is definitely better, we are spending the weekend together. He really doesn't like that part of the "drama" is one of the boss guys making sexually questionable comments at me.
Posted by bnr7013Thank you! 🙂
Oh, congrats on the promotion!!! Go have a cocktail....without him since he wanna be fancy 😉
Report back.
Only read OP.
First of all, congrats to your promotion! 🙂
Second of all, talk to him. People are so very different when it comes to these things, imo. I know many people (mainly guys) who think it's very annoying when people feel the need to respond to every text they get - there was no question, nothing was unclear, what's the deal with that? Personally, I like to rather answer one time too many if I'm uncertain about the other person't style of communication, but that's me.
Just talk to him about how he feels about these things. Imo. Good luck! 🙂
First of all, congrats to your promotion! 🙂
Second of all, talk to him. People are so very different when it comes to these things, imo. I know many people (mainly guys) who think it's very annoying when people feel the need to respond to every text they get - there was no question, nothing was unclear, what's the deal with that? Personally, I like to rather answer one time too many if I'm uncertain about the other person't style of communication, but that's me.
Just talk to him about how he feels about these things. Imo. Good luck! 🙂
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