How do you, caps handle break-ups (being left)?

Just curious.

id assume how anyone else would handle it. it'll suck, hurt, blah blah blah but we'll get over it. what makes you ask? are you afraid of leaving him?

Yeah, I am out of it. Misunderstanding and lack of communication is so regualr it is not worth going on any more. One day great, the next boom! on the ground. But no fights, not even a particular reason. I gave up.

As we are functioning differently I just wonder how this affects you Caps. I had another Cap before this one, a great man but married. He lived far from his wife for 7 years but kept the marriage. We liked each other a lot, fireworks in bed etc but i tried and distanced myslef cos did not want to be a catalyser in their marriage. I hear from him from time to time I can tell his voice is trembling on the phone. He wants us to meet, go see places together, etc. My guess would be he still have some feelings.

Posted by asha
Yeah, I am out of it. Misunderstanding and lack of communication is so regualr it is not worth going on any more. One day great, the next boom! on the ground. But no fights, not even a particular reason. I gave up.

As we are functioning differently I just wonder how this affects you Caps. I had another Cap before this one, a great man but married. He lived far from his wife for 7 years but kept the marriage. We liked each other a lot, fireworks in bed etc but i tried and distanced myslef cos did not want to be a catalyser in their marriage. I hear from him from time to time I can tell his voice is trembling on the phone. He wants us to meet, go see places together, etc. My guess would be he still have some feelings.

He can have all the feelings in the world. He's attached to someone else so whatever to him.

As with this new or current Cap. He's probably going to go through the motions but he'll be just fine. Don't worry at all about him. Just do what you need to move forward.

Just be honest with him and he will appreciate that, no matter how much it hurts.

I'll leave unless the fishing line called love is in-between us then im grabbing you back.

Be honest with him about it all. Be honest with yourself about the way you feel. Make sure you have a proper reason for leaving...if it's something that can be solved...or, if its something that you guys can work through, think about your decision. If you break up, is this a problem that will come right back at you in the next relationship? Before you make that choice, be certain, be clear, and be definite.

Once you are honest with cap, depending on the way he feels, will either try to win you back, or be too hurt to do so. But generally, he will pick up the pieces after a while of moping aroud being sad.

I've never been left...so I don't know how I would handle it. But the one thing I understand is you cannot hold back personal growth. Whether it's you or your partner...if it's time to go, it's time. If they want out, the worst thing is to cage them in. No matter how much I will be hurting...if they are not happy with me, then I will be able to let them go.

I totally agree with everybody's statement. I have been feelin like the post above mines, if I feel they arent happy its easier to let em go, so I am in the same perdictment as you, I have been contenplatin on leavin my cap, lexi said itll get borin and fast, but not only that is wrong he has an aries moon which doesnt go with a virgomoon but both of us have the sag in venus,so it sort of balances out, but I cant get over the bs, no matterr how small the issues,so if its time to go and they dont worry bout keepin u then byebye

It all comes falling down....however it is then time to endure and be brave :]

We handle it stoically.

we will be wrecked just like any other sign but we will withdraw to not let it be seen.disappear for awhile to lick our wounds.

i personally got dumped twice first time,first bf it hurt bad,tears, writing i remember all the songs i listen to but after awhile it gets better. oddly after i move on he came back well attempted three times over three years he was a cap but i was over him.


second one now first gf scorp the irony hmm being a wreck is a understatement first true love and all that first person i let all the walls down for.still going through this process but as i said being a wreck depression,anxiety,pain sleepless night you know the drill scary place.but after we will slowly pick up the pieces.

even if we want to tell you how we feel after we regain our composure its going to be hard based on how hurt we are to let u know whats in its like back to being a loner.


we will analyze and internalize everything and see where we went wrong and what can be improved in us to be a better mate.it weird its like we get hotter to exes after a break up so i've heard still.

ILYB - Isn't love better than just empty sex? Or have you never been in love before?

One Cap friend was really infuriated after a break up. Not because of the break up itself but because the gf decided she would let everyone know about the details of the relationship and the break up. That was a bad move from her side.

what if the girl just need to talk to someone ?

hell with that if my head all sort of fucked im gnna clear it with someone thats been around to from the relationship or a close friend. not going into detail of every inch but clear enough to understand. and for you to get perspective

Posted by capgirl75
I agree with the other posters. I do appreciate honesty. I have had a really hard time with it, though, when someone has just "disappeared". I become obsessive, wondering what happened, and I analyze and internalize everything

This is meeee!!! lol I really struggle in that sense with not having a "conclusion" I"m beginning to realize there aren't any conclusions....

Several of the Cap guys I know deal with break-ups in this manner (in these stages):

1) Grief
2) Cold Anger ( you can see it in their eyes but they don't release it, ie, they don't yell, break things)
3) Channel anger & energy into something productive. The ones I know hit the gym & emerge even bigger hunks than they already were. One Cap guy told me, each time he does a bench press with the heaviest weights he can handle,--at the part where he pushes the barbell away-- he imagines pushing his ex-gf away from him.

He really loved her. Needless to say, he now has a killer chest.

Good q...

I just know im devastated, but keep it as much to myself as possible. Esp with every yr I get older, i show my sad/mad emotions less n less.

If I'm the one who's been left, chances are I still am deeply in love with this person. I'd be crushed. My first love left me. I was numb for a month. Stoic indeed. Then when the feeling came back to me, I was completely heartbroken. Obsessive. I healed when I finally opened my eyes and let myself open up to someone else.

If my bf left me... He'd take a part of me with him.

Id be so crushed, id be mad. Id feel like a failure. I wouldnt want to keep in touch. Id be bitter if I tried. Id keep treading til I reached dry land. Continue with life seemingly unaltered, but prob desperately trying to heal. Getting out, being social, taking on some new goal... until I remember myself as a lively single person.

her cap bf was married—?

Hey, hey, what is happening here guys? Where did this come from?

My Cap was divorsed when I met him, a free man. And this is an old thread.

I was here more than 1,5 years ago complaining of his behaviour; other people were never involved. We are are steady now and he is the perfect gentleman and a very warm and sweet man.

Which cap?

What you mean which cap? I only had 1 cap in my life, this one.

Posted by asha
Yeah, I am out of it. Misunderstanding and lack of communication is so regualr it is not worth going on any more. One day great, the next boom! on the ground. But no fights, not even a particular reason. I gave up.

As we are functioning differently I just wonder how this affects you Caps. I had another Cap before this one, a great man but married. He lived far from his wife for 7 years but kept the marriage. We liked each other a lot, fireworks in bed etc but i tried and distanced myslef cos did not want to be a catalyser in their marriage. I hear from him from time to time I can tell his voice is trembling on the phone. He wants us to meet, go see places together, etc. My guess would be he still have some feelings.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Do you have amnesia?

Aaaa 🙂))

Totally forgot this one but it was not a relationship, just friends with benefits for me. I pulled back cos did not want to ruin a marriage, which was still alive altough only bearly (they were not living together). Now that I think back this Cap was a prick for wanting to be with another woman before resolving his marriage issues. I probably saved his marriage. Anyway I did not want to be a reason for anyone to suffer. Not badly done, ah? 😉

How about if a CAP does the breaking up? Ive heard yall have put a lot of thought into prior to the break up and your minds are made up. Is that true? Do you CAP women like or deal with sex with an EX after a break up. Lastly, does time make CAP women miss their EX or out of sight out of mind? My EX CAP was the best sex either of us have ever had. I can't shake the thoughts of that. Wonder if even phases yall?

Posted by capgirl75
If I do the breaking up, he's toast. If I've ended the relationship, it was not a decision I made on the fly. It's something I know I have to do. Sometimes I feel bad, sometimes it's just been that the person was not "the one" and as soon as I figure that out, I end it. Sometimes there has been no wrong doing on the other side either, I just knew it wasn't right.

You older and have had more life experiences, the one I'm dealing with is late 20s, wonder if that changes anything? Prolly not.

Posted by PP
How about if a CAP does the breaking up? Ive heard yall have put a lot of thought into prior to the break up and your minds are made up. Is that true? Do you CAP women like or deal with sex with an EX after a break up. Lastly, does time make CAP women miss their EX or out of sight out of mind? My EX CAP was the best sex either of us have ever had. I can't shake the thoughts of that. Wonder if even phases yall?

The best sex? Possibly the gift and curse of scorpio venus. At the end of the day though, nobody wants to be reduced to being "the best you've ever had." I think that may initially be the goal, but Im sure that box gets a little claustrophobic.

Some Caps have control and will not fall victim to sexual desires. She may miss you, but if its the sex, on either end, thats missed the most then she's probably gone for good. That is simply not enough reason to go back.

Posted by lnana04

Posted by PP
How about if a CAP does the breaking up? Ive heard yall have put a lot of thought into prior to the break up and your minds are made up. Is that true? Do you CAP women like or deal with sex with an EX after a break up. Lastly, does time make CAP women miss their EX or out of sight out of mind? My EX CAP was the best sex either of us have ever had. I can't shake the thoughts of that. Wonder if even phases yall?

The best sex? Possibly the gift and curse of scorpio venus. At the end of the day though, nobody wants to be reduced to being "the best you've ever had." I think that may initially be the goal, but Im sure that box gets a little claustrophobic.

Some Caps have control and will not fall victim to sexual desires. She may miss you, but if its the sex, on either end, thats missed the most then she's probably gone for good. That is simply not enough reason to go back.

click to expand

lol..i have scorpio mars and its a curse 🙂

I get upset initially (who doesn't?) but I get over it relatively quickly. I just accept that the person doesn't want me in their life anymore and I start looking for bigger and better things. I got broken up with by a Virgo this August (4 1/2 year relationship) and by October I was already courting another guy. I never try to get them to take me back or anything, nor would I ever take him back, or still have sex with him or anything. We can be purely platonic friends, but that's it.

ANGER & RAGE! Go OUT!!! Paint the town RED!!! RETAIL therapy!!! Cry (only on the inside though!) Then meet somebody else or maybe 2-3 & flirt your heart out to forget the PAIN!!! Drink!!! Cry again (inside only!) Reasure yourself that it was THEIR LOSS! Keep on Keeping ON! :p

A cappy gal would NOT recommend retail therapy. Too much buyers remorse.

"I??ve decide to be a Lesbian"

...Well you leave, you cry and sniffle like an eight year old, you laugh at yourself for being such a stupid sod, you pick up your guitar...you disgust yourself and drown in smoke and coffee. You sleep, you hate her...you love her...and there is just something inside that is ripping you to bits (could be your heart) and is trying to escape through your mouth...

Then you think...meh, this is doing no good!

So you decide to get together with her, take her to a crowded bar. You go into the bathroom and change clothes, put on a wig and two lovely balloons are protruding out of your chest while your mascara and lipstick really enhance your cheekbones...

You have scissors, ketchup and a sausage and you walk out back into the bar ("I want to be free" is on the radio and you can't believe your luck) you tell her how much she means to you and tell her that if she wants to be a lesbian it's ok with you, you will adapt to her circumstances. You apologize for your strange outfit, but you explain that with time, hormones and some money well...at least I wont have to shave 😉, you say that you don't mind, that she can be the man of the house if she wants, that we can adopt, it's no big problem, that you will give her everything, EVERYTHING!..."do you know what everything means?"

You show her the scissors and put your hand down your skirt..."cut off" your sausage and offer it as a token of love...

She refuses it...tells you your crazy, that your a sick bastard and walks off...and does??t even take your sausage with her (that was the most painful part of it all), your token of love...so y just left to rot next to a glass of half empty beer.

So eat it while finishing her beer and walk back home feeling utterly surprised that your master plan did not work...

But hell, you gave it your best shot..it still hurt, you still disgusted yourself and still laughed at your own reflexion...but you tried in your own twisted little way..somehow it made everything seem a little bit better...

I heard Caps, most of the time, always come back. Although they say it would take quite a long time, that's when patience comes in.

Posted by BeoWulf

Several of the Cap guys I know deal with break-ups in this manner (in these stages):

1) Grief
2) Cold Anger ( you can see it in their eyes but they don't release it, ie, they don't yell, break things)
3) Channel anger & energy into something productive. The ones I know hit the gym & emerge even bigger hunks than they already were. One Cap guy told me, each time he does a bench press with the heaviest weights he can handle,--at the part where he pushes the barbell away-- he imagines pushing his ex-gf away from him.

He really loved her. Needless to say, he now has a killer chest.

Spot on I must say!!