How do we Caps handle disappointments?

i know we expect to be disappointed on some level and can handle that.

But how do you caps handle being disappoint in yourself when disappoint someone we care about deeply ?. i know we are our worst critic.

I did this just yesterday. Said something bad at the absolute wrong time. Their feelings were hurt and I felt like crap! I thought to myself, how am I suppose to help someone through a rough time yet say something to sink them into a deeper depression? I apologized repeatedly and didn't know what to do to make it better, which also sucked. I was just all wrong.

When I said it, I wanted them to get the point, but the way it was said, the words used, and the timing was just completely all off. I realized it was more about me being disappointed at their actions, which had nothing to do with me, then anything else, and I completely disregarded their feelings and it showed. I just blurted it out. ugh. I'll try to never do that again.

If it wasn't for them eventually getting over it, then I wouldn't have. I think if they were still hurt right now, I would be too.

yea apologizing like crazy wishing to take it back and cant. i just keep my distance as everything i say and do seems to make matters worst. yea i notice we can be so blunt and caught up in the moment we tend to disregard others feelings as we are caught up in ours without noticing at times. disappointments definitely our strong suit it affects our self image

i guess we wont forgive ourselves til the person forgives us? maybe?

I beat myself up too and really harp on it internally. Try to find a way to fix it, whether its for my own feelings or other people's. When other people disappoint, I kick myself for trusting them and thinking more of them - have to realize they are only human and so am I.

In my perspective, you just start to not believe in people anymore, many times you would say non rational animals are better since they dont lie about their feeling or something else.

For you, trust is everything.

And it really hurts when you feel someone is trustworthy and they betray that or you find out they are not. We feel we have such good intuition about people, then its hard to handle when we are wrong. It pisses me off when someone snow balls me like that and its hard to get over. Those relationships are never the same after the trust is gone. Doesn't matter if it is male/female/family/friends/co-workers, etc.

i totally agree trust is everything i dont have crazy trust issues im pretty open to trusting people of the show me a reason too.

me personal hearing someone say they dont trust me is like a glass shattering like what? this needs to be fix weird i know


and with the gym oh my i go crazy i wear my mind and body down i have to thats the only way im am able to sleep.


WE beat ourselves so much no one can knock us harder than ourselves

I know, its your "cross", I try to move you from that, wich is a very hard task.

very hard letting it go not that easy for us

im going through it myself im just in a place of indifference. i will just remain being me if we become friends again great, not i guess it just life.


eventually i will reach a point where i will no longer reach out because one side making a effort makes no sense.

its a sad day in the universe when something to great gets broken.

agreed @Metoo i guess its the not ready to say goodbye

and yea nowadays there's so much takers than givers. i will give til there is nothing more once i'm drained i'm drained then i'm gone.

Its funny when you reached that point it when people notice

very much so

Posted by truecap
And it really hurts when you feel someone is trustworthy and they betray that or you find out they are not. We feel we have such good intuition about people, then its hard to handle when we are wrong. It pisses me off when someone snow balls me like that and its hard to get over. Those relationships are never the same after the trust is gone. Doesn't matter if it is male/female/family/friends/co-workers, etc.

OMG ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ THIS!!! Dealing with this EXACT thing! I keep kicking myself for this one! The rat bastard played me like a fiddle! He put SO MUCH of his time, energy, self into me at first that I was smitten, and I let my guard down, thinking there's no way someone would spend so much energy like this if they weren't really into me. He did this until he got the goods, then switched up on me.

NOW I will forever doubt my "good intuition" that I thought I had, I think I've lost my faith in men after this one! I just don't know anymore...

Psycho-analyzing every situation, but deep down inside, I HAVE to accept that I just got the wool pulled over my eyes, period.

And live in that prison of WHYYYY until my depression passes

Yes, we not only beat the person up in our minds, but we beat ourselves up aswell when we are played. A ton of self doubt creeps in for me...as if Im moreso responsible then they are.

If a family member or good friend disappoints me, then I'll try not to rely on them anymore and I'll see if there is anyone else I can turn to instead of him/her. I have little tolerance for disappointment if you're not a person that's important to me, so there is a very good chance I'll just burn bridges with you if I don't think you're worth associating with anymore.

If I disappoint someone then I'll just keep my distance and/or I'll try to figure out if there's something I can do to remedy the situation. I'll also think more about what I did wrong and try not to do again.

The previous two comments ring very true for me as well. I would handle those situations the same way.